Hold Me Now It's My Turn
by YenGirl
Summary: For years Kaname had watched and waited, hungry for the love Yuuki had and growing lonelier and sadder with each passing year. But now that she was gone... "Hold me now, Zero," he whispered. "It's my turn." Yaoi. ZxK KxZ. COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1: The Teaser

**Author Notes:** I know, I know! Do NOT start a new story without first finishing your existing ones but I did – well, what can I say? The muses dictate my hand and my train of (pervy) thoughts! _-smiles- _I added a hint in the very last chapter of Hold Me and have to follow it up, so here is the sequel to Hold Me, my very first VK fanfic.

ZeroxYuuki was my first love (as far as VK pairings go) but I have since been hopelessly in love with Kaname and Zero as a couple. I just can't see Kaname with anyone else and generally do not like OCs as a main pairing but I agree they're fine as villains or supporting characters :D I read, write and adore both KxZ and ZxK but I want to try my hand at the latter hence Hold Me Now will be predominantly ZeroxKaname. It will have its usual dose of angst, OOC-ness and sappiness galore but I hope you all enjoy it all the same :D

**Spoilers for Hold Me:** Yuuki is Kaname's younger sister but remains human. Kaname agreed to give Zero his pure blood indefinitely after Yuuki decides that she loves Zero.

This sequel is set many years after Hold Me ends, after Yuuki passes away due to old age and natural causes. Zero is devastated and wants to end his life but Kaname is desperate to stop him, knowing that he finally has a chance to experience the love his sister had.

**Appreciation:** To everyone who wanted a sequel and/or commented on Kaname's loneliness in Hold Me, hope you enjoy this and don't forget to review.

**Warning:** Character death remembered (Yuuki's).

**Summary:** For years he had watched and waited, hungry for the love Yuuki had and growing lonelier and sadder with each passing year. But now that she was gone, Kaname could finally allow himself to hope. "Hold me now, Zero," he whispered. "It's my turn." Yaoi. ZxK KxZ.

**Rating:** 'M'

**Disclaimer:** Vampire Knight could only and does belong to the great Matsuri Hino.

-- Chapter Start --

This chapter is just a teaser to whet your appetites. I'm sure you'll recognise the (slightly edited) excerpts below from Hold Me :D

**Chapter 5: All Souls Day**

Zero looked wildly from one man to the other, before the pureblood's dark compelling gaze held his again. The fierce gaze had softened slightly with understanding and something faintly resembling respect.

"Yuuki will be fine, you know I would never hurt her." Kaname stood up with Yuuki in his arms, not really sure why he even bothered explaining his actions to the ex-human vampire, only there was a desperation in the suffering eyes that called out to him.

.

**Chapter 6: May I Have This Dance?**

The pureblood's gaze was steady on him. Zero returned his look, hesitated, then nodded his head once. Briefly. Kaname inclined his head in return, gracefully. Ichijo's face was almost comical in his surprise at he witnessed the subtle masculine exchange. Then the pureblood vampire turned and left the hall, followed by Ichijo. Zero stared after them for a moment before Yuuki tugged on his hand, and he only saw her and no one else.

.

**Chapter 14: Going Too Far**

Zero's jaw clenched even harder. The way Kuran walked - it just had to be a put on. _No one_, particularly a male, should ever walk _that _well, _that _gracefully.

.

**Chapter 17: Holiday Break**

They stared at each other for a long moment - the dark haired pureblood, dressed in white. The silver haired ex-human, in black. Mirror images of each other. Both of them loving Yuuki and reluctantly accepting that the other loved her just as much, if not more.

Then the pureblood sighed softly. "Sometimes, we hurt the ones we love, Zero-kun... even though it is the last thing we intended," he murmured, half to himself.

.

**Chapter 20: Yuuki's Decision**

"Promise me that you won't do anything stupid." Kaname's voice was harder now, compelling. And his meaning was crystal clear to both of them. He was telling Zero not to end his life because they both knew how it would devastate Yuuki. Zero found himself staring at the pureblood again, mesmerised. The stern look softened.

"For Yuuki. For her sake," Kaname murmured as he took a step closer. Zero wondered if he were dreaming - the pureblood was as close to pleading as he had ever seen him. There was a long moment of silence as they looked at each other. There was a world of things unsaid but somehow, they both understood. Everything they thought, or said, planned, or did - everything was for Yuuki. No one else.

…

No. The pureblood didn't need anyone to tell him that Zero hadn't deliberately drained Yuuki. Despite the ex-human's expressionless face, his anger and his moodiness, anyone who cared to look at him hard enough couldn't have failed to see, especially in recent months, that Zero Kiryuu was completely and irrevocably in love with Yuuki Cross.

…

Kaname paused. "My dear," he murmured, his dark eyes filled with sudden pain. "You have to choose - it's time."

...

"Choose between Kiryuu-kun... or me, Yuuki," he said.

…

"You - you wanted Yuuki to choose me? Why?" Zero asked dazedly. The world was spinning dizzily; nothing made sense to him anymore. Nothing except Yuuki trembling in his arms, still sobbing quietly against his chest as he leaned back against the wall. And that strangely compelling look in Kaname's eyes as he smiled.

_Because Kiryuu, I would only relinquish Yuuki to the one who loves her as much as I do._

…

Kaname's hand threaded through the silver hair, his eyes closing as he held the boy's head to his neck. He leaned forward, balancing his weight with his other hand pressed flat against the wall beside Zero's head. Even though his eyes were closed, his ears and senses were open and on alert, fully aware of his surroundings. He knew Yuuki was kneeling beside them now, her wide eyes taking in the sight of Zero's face buried in the pureblood's neck, a sight she'd never before imagined. Kaname tried hard to stop his body from trembling because giving blood was new to him. It meant giving in, betraying weakness and loss of control… but he knew it could also mean love... trust... understanding.

...

Zero looked at the floor as he licked his lips self-consciously, trying not to remember how Kaname's lean but strong body had trembled against his as he drank, and especially as he licked the swiftly healing puncture wounds on the pale skin. Zero's body was also shaking but it was from the pure rush of Kaname's intoxicating blood in his body, stabilising his body and his mind, driving away the impending shadow of madness.

...

**Chapter 21: Zero's Promised Absolved**

There was no reason for Zero to be rude to the young pureblood, just like there was no reason for Kaname to dislike Zero either. But still, the amethyst gaze resting on him now was almost fierce in its intensity and after a moment, the pureblood realised why - Zero had actually held out his right hand towards him.

"Kuran... sama," he said, a slight flush creeping up his pale cheeks. This was _embarrassing_... he could feel Yuuki staring at him. Heck, Takuma was staring at him too. But he'd struggled with himself just now as Kaname was talking to Yuuki and yes, this was what he wanted to say. From the heart.

Despite his habitual reserve, Kaname's eyebrows rose a little as his gaze dropped to the offered hand. There was an uncomfortable look on Zero's face now and the pureblood knew it hadn't been easy at all for the ex-human to say and do that. It took courage... and honour... two things Kaname understood and respected.

The pureblood reached out to grasp Zero's hand firmly in his own elegant one, his eyes warming with respect. "Just 'Kaname'... Zero-kun," he offered quietly.

.

**Chapter 26: Man To Man**

Zero flushed even deeper at the unmistakable meaning in Kaname's words and the pureblood smiled a little.

"You don't have to be embarrassed, Zero. We are vampires, you and I. Taking the blood of another person, whether human or vampire affects us psychologically, and it gets even more intense when emotions or feelings are involved."

Kaname made sure he kept his voice level and matter of fact. After all, Zero had taken from him once too, and would continue to do so indefinitely.

No need to freak the boy out.

...

After a couple of minutes of battling with himself, Zero finally forced his gaze to meet Kaname's again. "I can't tell you that, Kaname. But I promise you this - I will not take Yuuki's virtue until the day we are wed."

.

**Chapter 29: Promises and Vows**

The room was redolent with the perfume of the fresh roses and air conditioning kept the interior comfortably cooled. Again, Chairman Cross' eyes were suspiciously moist behind his glasses as the door opened and Kaname walked Yuuki down the four metre long carpeted aisle to where Zero stood waiting with Yagari, in front of the candlelit table. Kaname had Yuuki's small hand tucked into the crook of his right elbow and as they stepped up to the table, the pureblood raised his younger sister's hand to his lips, his dark eyes locking onto Zero with a brief flash of fierce protectiveness. Then Kaname smiled and stood aside, his gaze on the graceful figure of his younger sister, standing hand in hand beside Zero at the front of the table.

.

**Chapter 30: Epilogue**

It had been almost a year since he had last been here last but every time he set foot in here, it always felt like... home. A place that he felt safe in, a place that was still safe - a haven where little or none of the never-ending political dealings of the vampire world touched. Kaname was determined to keep it that way and even more so now, when Cross Academy was also the home of the people he cherished most in the world – his younger sister Yuuki, her husband Zero, their adopted father Kaien Cross and of course, little Yuko Kiryuu.

...

Standing in the doorway, Kaname watched them silently. He had deliberately hidden his aura and was enjoying the loving scene in the kitchen with a wistful smile on his face. It was good to know that Zero and Yuuki behaved like this when they didn't know he was around. Kaname knew that the young hunter loved his younger sister and their daughter with all his heart but witnessing their open affection for each other still warmed his heart. He knew he no longer needed to worry about his sister's happiness – she was brimming with it.

_Ah, I envy you your happiness, Yuuki..._

Without making a sound, Kaname turned around and walked back to the living room.

...

Halfway through the meal, Zero noticed that Kaname had stopped eating. The pureblood was observing each person seated at the table, taking a moment to study each of the familiar faces. When he came to Zero who was sitting beside him, he paused. The young hunter had raised an eyebrow slightly in a silent enquiry but Kaname only shook his head before resuming eating again.

_I envy you your happiness too, Zero..._

...

While waiting for Aido's family to arrive, Kaname and Zero had taken the opportunity to hold their blood sharing session. With his fangs buried in the pureblood's pale neck and their bodies pressed close together, Zero could feel that Kaname's trembles were a little more pronounced than before. After he had taken his fill of that rich, pure blood, the hunter licked the wounds on Kaname's neck closed and murmured his thanks. But when he asked if Kaname was OK, the pureblood had just shrugged before turning away to button up his shirt.

Yuuki didn't say anything and Zero cuddled her closer. "He has us, Yuuki... and he'll always be welcome here, you know that."

His words made Yuuki blink back sudden tears. She loved the fact that the two most important men in her lives no longer had any enmity between them. "You're right, Zero. But I do hope that he won't remain lonely forever... that there will be someone to love him some day."

.

-- Chapter End --


	2. Chapter 2: The Passing

**Author Notes:** Sorry for the long wait but it's the best I can do right now, what with my current 12 hour job. Here's the second chapter at last, my desperate inner KxZ fangirl (or ZxK fangirl rather) having successfully sat on my KainxRuka fangirl for now :D This is going to be a predominantly ZxK fic so be warned that Kaname will come across as OOC, clingy and needy. Can't blame him, he's been starved for love and attention from a certain hunter for years, poor thing :D

-- Chapter Start --

Thirty years had passed since Kaname Kuran relinquished the position of Moon Dorm Leader to his then assistant, Takuma Ichijo. The pacifist cause that the pureblood and the late Headmaster of Cross Academy, Kaien Cross, held dear to their hearts had grown steadily year by year, evidenced by the ever increasing number of Night Class students. This was a marked difference compared to the mere handful of nobles who attended in the early days solely to show their fierce support and loyalty to the young and charismatic pureblood leader.

Kaname had made a name for himself in the world of commerce and now had residences all over the world - palatial houses, luxurious villas, cozy cottages and penthouse apartments - but whenever he could get time off from his very busy schedule, he would inevitably spend most of them at Cross Academy. This school was the only place that he could remotely call home and up until today, there was always a room kept ready for him at all times. It wasn't in the Moon Dorms as one might suspect even though that building itself had been expanded over the years to cater for more and more vampire students. No; whenever Kaname came back to Cross Academy, he slept in his own room in the Chairman's quarters that had also been renovated to accommodate Zero and Yuuki's family.

To the vampire world at large, Kaname Kuran was a pureblood prince as well as an astute businessman helming a large conglomerate of companies with the very best legal and finance brains in both the vampire and human world working for him but to the Kiryuu family, he was someone completely different and they only saw that other side of him on the very rare occasions when he received telephone calls from one of his officers with matters deemed urgent enough to disrupt his precious vacation time. Kaname truly cherished the days he could spend with his sister's family. To him, the journey of traveling to Cross Academy itself was filled with longing and anticipation... like waiting to come home after experiencing a very long and draining day. Arriving there was even better... like stepping into a very comfortable pair of home bunny slippers... and being enveloped in the softest, most luxuriant fur coat ever only this garment was made of something far more precious than the rarest of mink. It was woven with unconditional love, full acceptance and all the laughter, camaraderie and teasing of a normal loving family.

Actually, if Kaname were painfully honest with himself, he might admit that those visits were always laced with the ever present tinge of bittersweet melancholy but he had had enough time to get used to the feeling and hid it well enough... most of the time. Outwardly, he was a loving older brother to Yuuki and an adoring uncle to Yuko and the male twins Ichiru and Isamu. To Zero who had once despaired of living long enough to win Yuuki's heart let alone become a husband, lover and father, the pureblood was the best brother-in-law one could hope for. Kaname hardly ever interfered in their family affairs, sided Zero more than he did Yuuki (in matters where she fretted over her husband's safety during his hunter missions) and only offered advice when asked. Kaname also took pains to attend as many of their family gatherings as he could, coming each time with lavish gifts and treats and never failed to send tickets for all expense paid vacations every year. The last was something that had taken Zero years to reconcile himself to even with the full force of Kaname's persuasive arguments and charming smiles amidst the background chorus of Yuko and the twins' voices clamouring for their father to "Please just accept the tickets, Papa!"

More importantly than that, the pureblood had always upheld the very important promise he made to the couple all those years ago and continued to give Zero as much of his pure blood as the silver haired hunter needed. By right, Zero should have needed these feedings less and less as his body grew stronger each year with the power of Kaname's blood. Besides, continuous improvements on the blood tablets had made it possible for him to ingest them in times of emergency. Still... there were unforeseen circumstances during some of his hunter missions that caused him injuries and he had required Kaname's blood to heal before blood lust set in. Thankfully, it was something the pureblood never seemed to begrudge him. Zero often chafed at the inconvenience it must have caused his brother-in-law because it seemed that Kaname would just drop whatever project or meeting he was immersed in at that time to fly to his side, ignoring Zero's gruff grumbles that he was just fine and hardly worth a fraction of the thousands of business dollars incurred by these interruptions. Kaname would predictably soothe away his grumbles with practiced ease or just ignore them as he laid bare his neck. Occasionally, the blood sharing would take even place on board one of Kaname's private jets in order to save time. Hanabusa Aido had helped design the comfortable and completely scent proofed room each jet had. They were extremely useful and both hunter and pureblood would sit there and chat quietly as the former rested and healed after taking in the latter's blood. Zero often suspected that Kaname needed the rest as well because of how... well, how uncharacteristically _shaken _he seemed to be after each transaction but it was something Kaname never admitted to despite the hunter's gently probing queries.

- o -

When Kaname came back to Cross Academy on this visit though, it was with heavy, sleep deprived eyes and an even heavier heart. He was worn out with grief, sorrow and exhaustion. There were no lavish presents accompanying him this time and he knew there would be no happy smiles or laughter to greet him either. Kaname had come home to give a final farewell to his younger sister.

It was a cold and drizzly morning when Yuuki Cross, beloved wife of Zero Kiryuu and proud mother of Yuko, Ichiru and Isamu was laid to rest. A large group of both Day and Night Class students from the renowned Cross Academy had followed the convoy of cars on the two kilometer walk from the school to the cemetery, making up a somber group in inverse images of their black and white uniforms. No one complained about the early hour nor the rain when it seemed like even the heavens were shedding tears for one dearly departed soul. Besides, a mere glimpse of the intense sorrow on any of Kiryuu family's faces would have nipped any complaints, however half hearted, in the bud.

The ceremony itself was short but it didn't feel rushed. Perhaps time had stood still for a moment... or was creeping along slowly as if loathed to to show disrespect by hastening the timeless ritual. The bereaved husband stood silently on one side of the freshly dug grave with bowed head, flanked by Yuko and her husband Tomi Aido on one side and Ichiru and Isamu on the other side with their respective girlfriends. All their faces were pale and drawn but Zero's was exceptionally haggard. Everyone who knew him were more than aware of the countless hours he had spent by his late wife's bedside, forgoing both food and sleep, unable to feel anything but desperate hope as he held her frail hands, talked to her endlessly, prayed for her recovery and remained in complete denial of the inevitable end.

Yuuki had been diagnosed with second stage cancer when she had just turned forty six. For the next three months, her family had put their lives on hold and rearranged their schedules to spend more time with her. Kaname had temporarily handed the reins over to his immediate officers and even given up on several lucrative acquisitions in order to spend more time with the Kiryuu family. He had flown the best doctors to Yuuki's side and footed every expensive medical treatment there was but long before Zero could accept the fact, Kaname had known of the futility. Human bodies were not made to withstand too much suffering after all and she... his beloved sister had certainly done her best to battle her debilitating illness. The last time Kaname had seen her and spoken to her was two days ago when they had finally discharged her from the private hospital she was in and taken her home at her request.

Now, Yuuki was left them all. Kaname was deeply saddened that she was no longer around, that the beautifully warm smile she graced everyone with was gone. He was saddened that her family had lost the most wonderful woman they had ever known and that her husband and children would have to go on living without her gentle loving presence and her innate sweet and caring nature. He was saddened that her life had been so cruelly cut short, even by human standards and that she had not lived to see her children have their own families. But still, Kaname was... he was glad that at least, Yuuki was no longer in pain. It had been immensely torturous to everyone who loved her, seeing her frail body struggle against the pain in the few short months she was in the hospital. Her heart was as strong as her determination but the slight body it was contained in didn't stand a chance. She didn't get to best her illness but at least she was at peace now and she had left the world two days ago surrounded by her husband and children, their tearful and repeated words of love filling her very last moments even as she struggled to voice the same to them. Yes, everyone else now had to contend with their grief and loss but... but at least, his beloved Yuuki was now at peace.

Kaname got down from his limousine and slipped on his sunglasses as he made his way to the crowd of people surrounding Yuuki's grave. He had intentionally muted his aura in order not to distract the Night Class students from the somber ceremony but the familiar group of nobles saw him and bowed briefly as he walked up to the other side of the grave. Takuma, Shiki, Rima, Aido, Kain and Ruka were there. Seiren had also followed Kaname in a second car but he kept his eyes and his attention on the small family standing on the other side of the grave.

The priest and the deputy Headmistress of Cross Academy spoke for Yuuki but neither Zero nor Kaname offered any eulogy. Everyone who knew them already knew how they felt about her and anyway, their hearts were too heavy with grief. Both men feared that they would break down and blubber like a child instead of doing her memory justice. This was not what she would have wanted and they knew it. There were so many things they wanted to say... but they had already said all those things to her in private and that was what mattered in the end; that she had heard the words and felt the love that had come from their hearts. At a signal from the priest, Yuko raised the bunch of white daisies in her trembling hands. She tearfully pressed a kiss onto each flower before casting the bouquet onto the coffin in the ground. It landed on the polished wood with a soft thud. Two more similar thuds followed as her twin brothers threw their own bouquets and that was when Zero broke down completely.

It was over. His very reason for living was gone and that meant his life was over. Yuuki had left him for good and would no longer be around for him to love and care for. Dear God, how was he to continue living like this, when there was no one to live for? Falling to his knees and completely heedless of the wet, muddy soil caking his crisp black trousers, Zero gave into the wracking sobs that tore from his hurting, aching chest. He had shed tears for the past few weeks when he was alone and had cried every night for the past two days but it seemed that he was not done yet. Upon hearing their strong and loving father break down, similar sobs started shaking the other three. As one, they crouched down beside Zero and clung onto each other, tears running down their faces.

"Dearest," Zero sobbed. "How could you leave me behind? How...? I have nothing more to live for now... nothing..."

Even a heart of stone would have melted at those broken words and many of those present started shedding tears as well. Kaname was no exception. He was more than capable of coldness and ruthlessness when it came to business and adversaries but his heart was softer than marshmallows when it came to this precious group of people and Zero's broken words caused burning tears to well up in his tired eyes as the knot of grief inside his heart tightened almost unbearably.

Zero was right. He hardly looked a day above twenty five due to his vampire side and regular intakes of Kaname's blood throughout the past thirty years, he still had his children and his career... but in a way, he _was _alone now. Kaname knew that feeling all too well. He had been alone almost all his life, not just now.

- o -

The funeral was finally over and everyone was starting to leave. Kaname followed silently behind Zero and his family, ignoring the group of nobles walking a respectful distance behind him. He paused as Zero stopped at another section of the cemetery. There were two tombstones here that were very dear and familiar to him and Yuuki. They were not the twin ones of couples but rather two separate graves placed very close by one another. Silently, Zero rested a hand on each stone.

Kaien Cross and Touga Yagari.

One a bachelor and the other a divorced man. Both had been fearsome and renowned vampire hunters even though one had retired earlier than the other. They were partners at one time and the best of friends after that. But only a few knew they had been lovers as well. Zero and Yuuki, of course... their children... and Kaname Kuran. No one told him that but then, they hadn't needed to. Kaname had seen how the two older hunters interacted around each other during the Kiryuu family gatherings, particularly when they were more than aware that there was a very astute pureblood in their midst. However subtle they were, Kaname was an expert at reading body language and he found that Cross wasn't as eager to hide their relationship as Yagari was. Kaname found his patience wearing thin when he attended a third family dinner and suffered the same simmering tension between the two older men, augmented by the very obvious way Zero and Yuuki were trying _not _to smile at each other. The pureblood finally hinted that he was very much aware of what was going on, thank you, and that he didn't consider it his business at all. Things went on much better after that night and even Yagari relaxed, going so far to keep his arm around Cross' shoulders when Kaname walked in on the two of them in Yuuki's kitchen one night. They were in charge of mixing the fruit punch... or were supposed to be - Kaname couldn't help noticing the rosy flush on the shorter man's face.

Kaname was reminded of that memory so many years ago as he stood there silently and continued to watch Zero. He could feel his heart was thudding almost painfully in his chest as the silver haired hunter lightly traced the engraved names on both the tombstones, one at a time, an affectionate but wistful look on his haggard face. Kaname couldn't help wondering at that look. He hadn't thought that Zero would accept the relationship between his sensei and his adopted father but he had indeed and it had to have been due to Yuuki's influence, direct or not. She was like that all her life... somehow, you just wanted to make her happy... no matter what it was that she wanted you to do... and Kaname had to swallow hard as tears threatened his composure again.

Finally, Zero roused himself and walked on with Yuko and the twins beside him. As they reached the cars, Kaname caught up with them and there was a round of tearful hugs between him, Yuko and the twins. Zero embraced Kaname as well and the pureblood took the opportunity to remind him that their next blood sharing was due. The hunter only gave an absent nod at that but Kaname was content and had to take a moment to compose himself before turning around to face the group of nobles waiting silently to offer their condolences to him. Takuma was the only one amongst them who dared to embrace Kaname and he stayed close to his friend's side as the other nobles stepped up. Kaname nodded silently as he accepted each of their wishes but spoke little. Now that Zero and his children had left, the pureblood longed to be alone and was profoundly relieved to finally gain the solitude of his limousine half a minute later, with the privacy of its heavily tinted windows and the partition kept up. With a relieved but tired sigh, he leaned his pounding head against the soft leather backrest, removed his sunglasses and closed his burning eyes, his mind full of the people he loved as his own family and his heart a heavy stone of grief sitting in his chest.

It was two minutes later when a sudden upwelling of emotion throbbed in that same heart, catching Kaname off guard and almost sending him reeling. He almost gasped at the suddenness of it and was thankful that he was already in his limousine so that no one witnessed his shocking moment of knee weakening revelation... of... of _hope_. He had suddenly realised that a door that always remained firmly shut and locked to him was now tantalisingly unlocked.

In fact, there was now a very real possibility that it could perhaps, one day even be... opened.

_Dear God. _

The knowledge both shocked and scared Kaname but at the same time, it thrilled him. It was something that he had always secretly, almost unconsciously yearned for but at the same time, it was also something that he hadn't ever dared to put into words before, not even in his own mind. He had known that it was impossible, that it was something he shouldn't even entertain lest it drove him crazy with wanting but...

Happiness such as he had never know before was now within his reach... if he but dared to take it.

_Dared?_

Kaname found himself mentally shaking his head at himself for being scared of something so trivial when practically everyone else in the world was scared of him. But this wasn't a trivial matter to him. No, not in the least. There were only two individuals in this world whose opinions mattered to him more than anyone else's and now, only one of them was still living. But it was this very person that... Kaname swallowed hard, feeling his skin prickle all over with goose bumps of shame and guilt at the admission he was now allowing to finally take shape in his mind.

He now had _hope_.

A stirring hope that he might no longer be alone in the years, no, centuries to come.

A heartfelt hope that he might at long, long last give expression to the suffocating, swelling emotions that had resided in his lonely hurting heart for far too long.

A yearning hope that he would finally know what it was like to exchange words and actions that spoke of intimacy, tenderness and closeness with someone else.

A burning, _shuddering _soul deep hope that Zero Kiryuu, well known vampire hunter and Level D vampire, faithful and loving husband to Yuuki Cross and wonderful father to their children might -ah, if all the stars in the universe would only take pity on this pathetic and lonely soul that was Kaname Kuran- one day look at him with the same look he always gave his late wife. Even if Zero was his one time perceived love rival and now brother-in-law. Even if he was as straight as an arrow. Even if he had never before harboured any faintly amorous thoughts whatsoever towards the pureblood.

So really, was it... was it so very wrong then? Kaname asked hesitantly, almost timidly to any beings who might have the ability and brazenness to pry into his thoughts at this very moment. Was it so horribly wrong to think of his own happiness on the very day of his only sister's funeral when all his waking and sleeping thoughts had been hopelessly centered on her husband for so many years even if he had tried his very best to deny and ignore them?

After all, he knew he would be the happiest man in the world if Zero would one day regard him with something more than just brotherly affection and friendship, even if it was only ten percent of the regard he held for Yuuki. In fact, Kaname could hardly comprehend how happy he would be if one day, his wildest dreams were to come true and Zero would come to care for him as much as he did his younger sister. It... it would likely be too much for his lonely heart to take in. In fact, it could very well be the death of him but as the limousine continued to carry Kaname back to Cross Academy, all he could think of was not how to win his latest merger but how to win Zero Kiryuu's love.

It really was much too soon to think of such a thing, of course - in fact, it was downright ridiculous! What would Zero think - what would his own sister think, if she knew? And their children! Besides, everyone now was grieving - Zero... no, Zero would think him mad... perhaps even demented... Kaname was already shaking inside from anticipating the hunter's bite in the next few minutes... so... no, anything more was just too soon... it was madness.

Pure madness.

But still... and here, Kaname couldn't help pressing trembling fingers to his eyes as a soft shudder of yearning shook him. But still, this was also the one thing he craved more than anything else in the whole world - Zero's love.

_Forgive me, Yuuki dear. But you've had your turn. Please... please let me now have mine._

-- Chapter End --


	3. Chapter 3: The Memories

**Author Notes: **I'm digging my own grave, I am, to be writing 2 stories while working 12 hours a day :D but I started this so here is the next chapter and thank you for waiting! The chapters won't be as long as my TOHOM ones but it's the best I can do with the very, very limited time I have now. Enjoy...

-- Chapter Start --

It was a matter of minutes before Zero and his family arrived back at Cross Academy. The school was still mostly empty since the staff and students had gone on foot and hence, not returned yet. Tomi drove the first car with Yuko beside him and Zero at the back. The latter was dimly aware that his son-in-law kept stealing glances at him through the rearview mirror throughout the short ride back but he ignored them, choosing instead to gaze out of the window. Ichiru and Isamu were following from behind with their girlfriends. Both cars drove straight past the gates and stopped in front of the Chairman's quarters. The five of them got down in silence and filed in through the front door, not saying anything. They had decided against having a wake and the house was silent as if it too, was missing its beloved mistress' presence. Yuko was still sniffling into a tissue crumpled in her hand with her other hand held tightly in Tomi's but from the others, there was no sound.

Zero was completely dry eyed now even though his composure was paper thin. He had broken down completely at the cemetery earlier but as embarrassing as that was and as uncharacteristic as it might seem to those who only knew him as a competent vampire hunter, he was still too numb to care that practically the entire school (and half of them vampire nobles at that) had witnessed his uncontrollable show of grief. Besides, his love for Yuuki was nothing to be ashamed and frankly, nothing mattered much anymore now that she was gone. Zero would willingly cry a river each and every day if that would bring her back...

_... manliness be damned!_

He had hidden his feelings from Yuuki many years ago, thinking that he had nothing to gain by letting her know. For one thing, Zero lived with the fear that he would one day lose control and drain her dry. For another, it had seemed pointless to confess his love for her; he had nothing to offer in comparison to Kaname Kuran, whom everyone, including Zero himself, believed would win her heart. But the day had come when Kaname finally forced Yuuki to make her choice in front of Zero and she had surprised them both by choosing her fellow prefect. Kaname had in turn surprised _them _by offering his supposed rival his pure, much sought after blood before disclosing the secret he had held for the past ten years - that Yuuki was actually his younger sister and fellow pureblood before their mother changed her.

Ever since that day, Zero had undergone a change that no one could have failed to notice, not even his dour sensei Touga Yagari. The silver haired boy had shed practically all of the angst and anger that had weighed him down for the past four years. He threw himself wholeheartedly into his hunter training and never failed to confess his love to Yuuki every single day and happily too. Only now, it felt like it still hadn't been enough. He really should have told her that every minute of every day, not just when he felt like it.

Now... it was too late.

Zero started a little at the gentle squeeze on his arm. He turned to see Yuko looking up at him with her wide amethyst coloured eyes red from crying and her lips trembling with a forced smile.

"Papa, why don't you sit down? I'll go make coffee for us all, OK?"

Ichiru and Isamu nodded at that but when they started towards the kitchen, Yuko waved them back.

"Tomi will help," she told them firmly. "You all sit down as well."

Yuko had met her brothers' girlfriends only briefly before this but she wanted them all to remain with her father. She had never seen him look so bereft, so... fragile. He was always cheerful and loving and he had remained strong and capable even when both their grandfathers had passed away, one after the other. No, she didn't want to leave her papa alone. At least, not now. Ichiru caught the silent message in her eyes and pulled his younger twin back but Zero had noticed the subtle exchange as well.

"No." His voice was just as firm as Yuko's and she glanced at him uncertainly. Zero forced a quick smile to his pale lips. It probably looked about as real as hers.

"I'm fine. Why don't you all go to town for supper? There's nothing to eat here."

Everyone immediately started to protest that they weren't hungry but Zero held up a hand, that brittle smile still on his lips.

"Go. Please," he added quietly. When they still hesitated, Tomi and the twins' eyes gravitating towards Yuko as if asking her to decide, Zero sighed.

"Kaname-oji-san will be here soon. I... won't be alone."

Really, it was almost comical how his children's faces seemed to relax a little upon hearing their beloved uncle's name. They knew of the long standing arrangement the pureblood had with their father even if they themselves had never personally witnessed it.

"All right," Yuko ventured after glancing at Tomi who shrugged. "But if you need anything, papa-"

"I'll call," Zero promised, still with that frozen smile on his lips. He was more than aware of the glances that passed between his daughter and her husband as well as the one that passed between her and the twins. It was inevitable. They all knew about the endless worry, the sleepless nights, the hopeless tears he had silently shed by their late mother's bedside. They had just seen how he had broken down earlier. By now, they had to be worried about his sanity.

Despite Zero's insistence that he was fine, it was a few minutes before he successfully got them to leave and he wondered inwardly if they intended to stay until Kaname actually arrived. When Zero could finally close the door behind them, he gave a long sigh and dipped his head, resting his forehead against the front door. He was alone at last. Truly and absolutely alone. Right now though, that was what he wanted. No matter how much he loved his family, he needed the solitude to calm himself before Kaname arrived. Their blood sharing sessions usually aroused feelings that were uncomfortable for Zero. He was always careful to keep them hidden from his brother-in-law who often seemed far more affected than he was. No sense in having them both go to pieces and even more mortifyingly, in each other's arms as well...!

Ignoring the goose bumps that had broken out on his arms, Zero straightened up and pushed that disturbing thought away. It was just something that came from blood sharing, that was all, what with the neck being such an erogenous zone... there was nothing to worry about. Zero turned around and started wandering through the house, his feet automatically carrying him past the living room and down the corridor to the bedroom that he and Yuuki shared. A very familiar path that he had trodden a million times before. This place. This house. It was his home. It wasn't the one in which he met Yuuki though.

Zero Kiryuu had arrived at the Chairman's house one cold winter's night, a thirteen year old boy still in shock but firmly believing that his life had ended. Having barely survived a vicious and traumatic incident that changed his life forever, he was stained with his own blood and betrayal and hatred poured from his eyes. And then Yuuki had opened the door...

Yes, it was the Chairman's house and it was his hand on Zero's shoulder but to the young boy standing silently there, it felt as if Yuuki was the one welcoming him into her home. There she was, a pint sized girl with a sweet heart shaped face, a pair of huge and compassionate eyes and long straight auburn hair that fell straight past her shoulders down her back. She had reached for his hand, taken care of him from that moment on and her straightforward determination to stay by his side had never failed to both infuriate and enchant Zero.

New tears blurred his vision but the hunter could find his way around his home blindfolded and when he reached his destination, his hand closed around the doorknob unerringly. He stood there in the doorway and the tears fell silently as he let the memories have their way, flooding his mind, heart and soul with momentous events that brought with them both swelling pride and bittersweet joy.

The frightening moments when he feared that his bloodlust would either kill Yuuki or turn her away from him... _no_. No. Zero shook his head and forced those memories away, deliberately choosing now to dwell on the happier times instead.

The moment in that empty classroom when Kaname had asked Yuuki to choose between them, wanting to know how deep her love for her fellow prefect was and the second that she had chosen Zero.

The moments of intimate conversations between Yuuki and him as they talked of their love and shared plans for their future, interspersed with kisses and embraces.

The moments of even more intimate pleasure as they continued to discover and explore each other's bodies, always with Zero's promise to Kaname in mind.

Yuuki's graduation day, looking radiant in her cap and gown with her face alight with pride and joy.

Their wedding night in this very room when they crossed the final boundary of sexual innocence hand in hand, lost in each other's love.

Their first pregnancy which had resulted in Yuko, an enchanting sprite with her father's colouring and her mother's temperament.

The twins and how Yuuki had insisted that one of them was to be named Ichiru as soon as they had learned that she was carrying boys.

Yuko's vampire fangs coming out at the age of five and a half and the startled cry from Touga Yagari who had been carrying her at that time and hence, became the unsuspecting victim of her first real bite.

Yuuki taking over as Headmistress of Cross Academy.

Zero's promotion on becoming a senior hunter as Touga Yagari finally retired.

Yuko starting school... and the twins...

Their tenth wedding anniversary.

Their twentieth.

Yuko's long awaited marriage to Tomi who openly declared that he had waited his entire life for her.

And then the day that their happy and loving world fell apart.

Shuddering, Zero whirled around and ran out of the bedroom. No, it was too much bear right now. He couldn't take... How could...? Why?! He just couldn't accept the fact that Yuuki had left him, really left him. Zero ran to the office which had once been Chairman Cross' and then Yuuki's when she had become the Headmistress of Cross Academy. He stumbled to the desk and sank down in one of the chairs facing it. But even in this room, there were memories to haunt him. A bittersweet smile appeared on Zero's pale lips as a particular one came to mind. He had confessed to a frantic Cross one morning that Yuuki had spent the night in his bed even though it had been mostly innocent. He remembered sitting in this very chair minutes after that, a teenager on the verge of adulthood - scared, angry, uncertain and embarrassed. Zero had fully expected to be chased out of this house and school at that time and was not even sure why he had spilled the beans on their 'sleeping arrangements' in the first place. Perhaps it was a silent cry to find out where he stood with them, a need to know that he _belonged_ somewhere.

To Zero's amazement, Cross had shown a surprising understanding and maturity in his choice of words and manner and the silver haired boy had left this very room in a daze, not quite realising that a potential explosion between rebellious teenage angst and righteous parental anger had been expertly defused by the same person whose eccentric mannerisms usually drove him up the wall. It was at that very moment that Chairman Cross truly became 'Father' to Zero. With his forearms resting on the desk and his trembling hands clasped tightly together, the silver haired hunter bowed his head as if in prayer.

"Father," he whispered brokenly. "Yuuki, your gentle princess is with you once again. Please... take care of her as you have done for so many years. You... and sensei together."

_Sensei..._

Another memory. Another wistful smile. The night Zero had found out just how close his father and his sensei were and by coincidence, in this room as a matter of fact. It had been almost ten years now since both men had passed on but Zero could still recall with clarity that night so many years ago. He and Yuuki had stumbled upon the unexpected sight of both older men kissing each other. Zero had been shocked and even a little disgusted at that time but Yuuki -with all her wide eyed innocent joy- has hinted how pleased she was as they resumed dinner. She wanted to let them know that they didn't have to hide their secret from her or Zero. Both men had turned to look at him then, their eyes silently asking for his acceptance if not his approval.

At that time, Zero had just won Yuuki's love a few days ago and learned that his one time enemy was actually Yuuki's brother and no longer his love rival but his benefactor in blood. Zero had hesitated only briefly before nodding, before he actually had a chance to think it out. Cross had blushed happily, Yagari had looked more relieved than he wanted to let on and the meal had progressed even more smoothly after that. Upon later reflection though, Zero realised that he honestly didn't mind and even if he did, it wasn't his business anyway. After all, neither men were attached to anyone else and they were ex-partners and the best of friends. So what if Zero had never thought they would be anything more than that? Having known first hand what it was like to feel all alone in the world and how immeasurably important it was to have at least one person you could trust and confide in, how on earth could he mind? How much more wonderful it was if that one person was also your lover, someone you could also share physical intimacy with as well as your dreams and fears?

Like he had with Yuuki...

Bless her - she had always looked for the best in people. Look at how she had never given up on him, when he himself had given up on life. Even now, Zero could picture her pretty laughing face during that dinner for it was obvious she found the whole thing amusing and adorable. Despite the ache that brought, another smile found its way to Zero's lips. There was no one else like her. There would be no one else like her for him and there was no one else he could even learn to care for even half as much. The bitter truth of that made the faint smile disappear and in its absence, new tears appeared. Sobs were once again struggling to get past Zero's aching throat but he choked them back. Life was cruel to snatch her away from him like this. Zero had known that he would enjoy a much longer life span now that his body was being regularly strengthened with Kaname's pure blood but he had always thought - or was it perhaps hoped? - that it was he who would go first - initially through madness and then later through one of his hunter missions. After all, just one moment of carelessness and it would be so easy for him to die. But no, cruel fate dictated that it was Yuuki who left him in the end.

That brought more recent and painful memories and they flew through Zero's mind in a dizzying rush of damning flashbacks - the unexplainable headaches, the sudden bouts of blinding pain, the endless waiting in the doctor's office... and then the bad news. Zero knew he had to be strong in front of Yuuki despite the cold fingers of fear that had gripped his heart, making it hard to breathe. But she was strong too. Yuuki had insisted on being the one to tell the children and Kaname. The pureblood had flown back immediately with his usual confident mask firmly in place and only Zero had seen the fear behind it. Then the never-ending rounds of tests and hospitals and more tests and hopes that were dashed again and again with each new treatment, each new specialist...

With his forehead resting on his hands, Zero was oblivious to the tears flowing from his eyes again. He was shaking, powerless to stop the continuous flood of memories from having their way. It was that night, that night when the sixth world renowned specialist had been unable to help them that, overcome with despair and with no hope left in sight, Zero had gone against his strongest belief, the one thing that he had never swayed from. It was something he had never once considered, not even when fine crows' feet started to appear at the outer corners of Yuuki's laughing eyes. It was something he had never once entertained, not even when she playfully hinted that others might soon start to wonder if Zero was her son instead of her spouse. It was something even Kaname himself had never mentioned and that night, Zero realised why.

That night, he had done the unthinkable. Choking back tears, he had left Yuuki and cornered Kaname in one of the small waiting rooms at the private hospital she was warded in. Zero had asked and then demanded and finally begged the pureblood to change Yuuki into what she once was. Anything, _anything _to stop the cancer from claiming her, anything to stop her from dying. But the only thing Kaname had done was shake his head with a world of anguish in his dark eyes. Zero's first emotion had been disbelief before shocked outrage made him snap, shouting words he had no right to say especially to Kaname who must have had the very same thoughts he had. The pureblood had sunk into a chair as if his legs could not keep him up. With his face hidden in his hands, Kaname explained in halting anguished tones that his mother's sacrifice to change Yuuki to human was final and completely irreversible.

Stunned and devastated, Zero had sunk into the nearest chair and stared at Kaname as the pureblood continued in that same trembling voice that even if the process was reversible, Yuuki was far too old to be changed and even if she wasn't, the fact that she was weak with cancer would have prevented it from being successful. Zero had jumped up then and railed bitterly at him, at life, fate and almost everything else for half an hour while Kaname took it all in silence, only standing up to clasp him on the shoulder in a hold that was almost painful once Zero had run out of words. The two men had clung to each other then, Zero shedding tears of hopelessness and Kaname fighting to hold his own tears back. In the pureblood's heart was a grief that in a way, went far deeper than Zero's. There was a part of Kaname that had always wanted his little sister back the way she was and he had known far sooner than Zero had that if Yuuki had remained a pureblood, this never would have happened. Never.

Neither men mentioned that scene once they had left the room. In their hearts, they felt they had somehow betrayed the woman they loved for it was something she had never asked of Kaname - to be turned into what she once was, knowing Zero's stand on this. No, she had remained as sweet and innocent as the day Zero married her and he felt horribly guilty for even thinking of wanting to turn her, of wanting her to be revert to a blood thirsty creature like him.

At length, the tears stopped but Zero remained where he was. Silence had settled in the office again, broken only by his laboured breathing and the ticking of the clock on the wall relentlessly counting away the seconds. The seconds of his life. The minutes. The hours. The days, weeks, months and years of his long, long life before he too, could finally rest beside his beloved Yuuki again.

Zero had no idea how long he sat there in a pained, numb daze. It had to be only be a few minutes but he slowly became aware that he wasn't alone any longer. Someone else was in this house. Someone was standing behind him in the open doorway. Zero still didn't turn around, he didn't need to. His hunter senses had long since grown used to this particular pureblood aura and even if they hadn't, his movements at this time would have been too slow to be of any help. Zero couldn't help wondering later if he had been unconsciously hoping that it would be an enemy standing there instead of a friend.

- o -

Kaname had intended to go straight to Cross Academy but the stunning revelation he experienced in the car had left him shaken and vulnerable. He knew it would be disastrous to go to Zero like this. Even a simple feeding session with the hunter would leave him trembling with longing and in the mood he was in, heaven alone knew what might happen. He might scare Zero or even disgust him. No, Kaname knew he had to calm himself down first. This wasn't the time to even hint of his feelings to Zero and the last thing he wanted was to have his brother-in-law find out accidentally and take it in the worst possible light.

It had taken around twenty minutes but at least Kaname now thought himself sufficiently composed. As he stood in the open doorway of the office, he allowed his traitorous eyes to trail longingly over the forlorn figure slumped in the chair. Yes, it would indeed be madness to even think of bringing up that topic now, when everyone's grief, even his and particularly Zero's was so new and raw. It was very, very much too soon to be thinking about his own happiness. Kaname felt his heart ache as he realised that as long as he had waited alone, he would have to wait some more. Months at the very least. Years perhaps. But as always, Zero's happiness came first and his own... a distant second.

Zero hadn't turned around but Kaname knew he had sensed his presence.

"Zero," he called out softly after a minute or so. "It's time for your feeding."

_I promise not to speak of my feelings but at least... I can have this one little comfort of knowing that you need me. I live for the moments when you hold me like I matter to you. You can have no idea how much I long for you... for your fangs..._

Zero closed his eyes tightly, feeling the tears soak his eyelashes and trail down his cheeks. His feeding. Kaname's blood. The magic elixir that kept him alive and kept him sane. Oh God, how unfair it was that while it was Yuuki's love for him that finally convinced Kaname to help him so many years ago, his own love for her just wasn't strong enough to save her life in turn. He took a deep breath and stood up before turning around. Kaname had braced himself, scenting the expected tears. He was holding himself back from wanting to just go over and hug Zero until the hurting stopped for both of them but it was the hunter's smile that stopped him in his tracks. It was as beautiful and fragile as it was frightening but it was what Zero said that robbed Kaname of his breath and made him feel as if his heart had stopped beating.

"Thank you, Kaname," Zero whispered. "I know I've said this before but I... Thank you. It - I know it can't have been easy being who you are, to – to submit to someone, to have someone bite you... again and again. I'm grateful for the years your blood has given to me. But... you no longer need to do so."

Zero paused and his smile grew more frightening to Kaname. It was even more beautiful this time but there was a finality about it that chilled the pureblood to the bone. He felt his heart stutter before speeding up with a sudden icy dread at what the hunter was going to say.

_No. Oh no, Zero, no - please, don't even think it. You can't - not when I've waited..._

Kaname felt his heart squeeze again when Zero's beautiful tear wet eyes hardened with an unmistakable resolve.

"I won't take your blood anymore, Kaname. Don't you see? Your obligation to me - it's over."

-- Chapter End --


	4. Chapter 4: The Promise

**Author Notes: **The next chapter. Thank you again everyone for your wonderful reviews and oops, the chapters are starting to get longer! _-is wondering if that's a good thing or not- _I'm sorry if this chapter's choppy in parts. Still, enjoy...

-- Chapter Start --

At Zero's words, Kaname felt his speeding heart lurch to a sudden stop for a small eternity before it resumed galloping again. He had already guessed a split second before that Zero was going to say something like this but actually hearing the words aloud made the shock that much more acute.

"No..." Kaname said softly, his breath hitching at the way his agitated heart was thumping hard in his chest. He couldn't seem to breathe, he couldn't seem to draw enough oxygen into his lungs. His mind was spinning, trying to process Zero's words over and over to see if there was possibly another less detrimental meaning to them but at the same time, he knew there wasn't. Zero didn't want to live anymore and it was understandable how he was feeling right now but then... how the hell was _he _going to live then?

Kaname knew he could survive indefinitely; he was a pureblood! Physically, he was practically indestructible. But mentally... ah, mentally he had survived the crushing, sometimes overwhelming feeling of being alone, of being above the rest all these years only by looking forward to the wonderful days off when he could sometimes even forget what he was... days when he would be treated only as an older brother and a much loved uncle. Kaname lived for his visits to Cross Academy. He lived for the hours when he could unwind in the undemanding company of Zero and Yuuki's family, enjoy the undivided attention of his nephews and niece and be spoiled rotten with delicious home cooked meals whipped up by Zero that Kaname inevitably swore would make him fat. Most importantly, he lived for the rapturous moments when he could hold his beloved hunter close to him, when he could forget reality and everything but the sweet familiar smell of Zero's scent, the enticing sounds of his hungry feeding, the steady beat of his heart against his chest and the knee weakening feel of those smooth sharp fangs embedded in his neck.

How was he to go on living if Zero were no longer here? He... he couldn't!

Besides, Kaname wanted so much more than just to have the hunter alive and taking his blood from time to time. He wanted to love Zero every moment of every day, really _love_ the hunter with everything he was capable of. True, Zero had been Yuuki's world and she had loved him wholeheartedly but that would be nothing compared to how _he _would love her husband given half a chance. Kaname would ensure that Zero would want for nothing for as long as he lived. He would be loved day and night. He would know that he was adored, cherished and worshipped, that he was respected as an individual, as a hunter, as a lover and most importantly, as an equal. Kaname himself would be happy to be anything the silver haired hunter wanted him to be.

Of course, that all depended on said hunter being alive in the first place.

"Zero - y-you can't be serious! Don't say that - you shouldn't even be thinking it!" Kaname found himself protesting, his usual eloquence having all but disappeared in the wake of this newest shock. Zero only nodded in reply. His tear wet and bloodshot eyes were still filled with sorrow but they had a dullness that was all too obvious.

"I have no reason to go on living, Kaname," he stated, his low voice husky with emotion. "You of all people should understand that. She was your only sister and I... I know you loved her too."

When Zero paused to swallow the inconvenient lump that had appeared in his throat, Kaname tried again.

"Yes! Yes, of course I did - I still do but Zero - please, you can't just..."

Zero only shook his head again before turning away. Kaname broke off and exhaled in frustration. This stupid, _stupid _inability to string a proper, persuasive and compelling sentence together just had to come in right _now _when the stakes were, to him, higher than they had ever been before. Kaname knew he had to get through to Zero. He just didn't know how. He should have expected this knowing how much the hunter loved Yuuki but in the frantic race to keep finding doctors and new treatments and then in the grief that swamped them all when they realised nothing could be done, the possibility that he might lose Zero as well had gone unnoticed.

But how could he stop Zero from wanting to give up on life? Zero was _family_. There was no way Kaname could just order him to live and expect that order to be followed with the unquestioning obedience of lesser vampires. Not Zero. On the night the hunter wed Yuuki, Kaname had vowed to himself that he would never impose his will on the hunter as long as his precious sister was loved and cherished. He had never had cause to regret that vow and in fact, he often found himself taking Zero's side over Yuuki's in the small family disagreements that he was sometimes pulled into.

But this...! Kaname was faced with a situation that was out of his control. It left him terrified and uncertain. This could not be happening... no, he refused to let it happen! To impose his pureblood will on this proud hunter who had accepted him as family and treated him like a brother all these years was tantamount to suicide as far as his unrequited love was concerned but there were other means. Emotional blackmail, for one. Yes. Zero was nothing if not just and honourable and that made the scales tip just a little bit in Kaname's favour. With nothing left to lose, the desperate pureblood strode forward and grasped Zero by his shoulders, long fingers gripping hard enough to spin him around.

"Don't, Zero! You can't just give up like this!"

Kaname didn't bother to hide the fear in his eyes or voice but again, Zero just shrugged. He tried to turn away but Kaname's tight grip prevented him and Zero frowned.

"Let me go," he said shortly. On any other day, Kaname would obey immediately but now, he just gave another shake that made Zero's frown turn into a glare.

"Stop it, Kaname!"

"I will not!

Kaname glared at him and Zero glared right back, completely fearless of the immense power that lay behind the crimson tinged eyes, of the aura in the air that was getting increasingly disturbed. What the hell did Kaname think he was doing, speaking to him as if he had done something wrong? Zero hadn't had this experience for almost three decades now. It left him feeling embarrassed and angry, as if he was seventeen all over again.

"Let me go! You're treating me like a child!" he shouted, forgetting that he was indeed starting to sound like one. Righteous anger was building fast inside of him, momentarily banking the grief tearing at his heart.

"I will do that when you stop behaving like one!" Kaname growled back, momentarily forgetting that he was shouting at the very person he would die for. Zero saw a glimpse of the pain and frustration in those reddish brown eyes and stared at him with despair replacing the anger in his own gaze.

"Why are you doing this, Kaname?" he asked dully.

_You should be relieved you have one less thing to do..._

"Because you're behaving like an idiot! You have so much to live for and you're forgetting all that!"

Kaname's words made Zero bristle again.

"I'm not! You're forgetting that Yuuki's gone! That I'll never see her again!"

Fresh tears welled up in Zero's eyes and his voice cracked at the end. It was the only thing that stopped Kaname from hitting him for insinuating that he had forgotten about his beloved sister.

"I haven't forgotten her at all!" the pureblood insisted raggedly, his own fangs lengthening rapidly in his anger. "How dare you tell me that to my face!"

He gave Zero another hard shake but to his consternation the hunter just stood there quietly and accepted it without protest. Kaname stopped before he injured him by accident; he wanted to shake reason into Zero, not break his bones... It was time for Plan B - lay on the guilt. He would have said or done just about _anything _to make Zero wake up and listen to him.

"There are other things you should care about, damnit!"

"Like what?" Zero asked in a dull tone that almost made Kaname explode with frustration.

"Like your children! Like your life! Your friends! Your career! Yuuki wouldn't want you to do this and you know it! She would want you to be happy, to go on living! What about Yuko? Ichiru? Isamu? You owe it to them to keep living, Zero! They've just lost their mother! How would they feel if they lost their father as well?!"

Zero's lips compressed into a thin line and he glared at Kaname again. He knew that, he wasn't stupid! He just... didn't want to hear about it - couldn't Kaname tell that it would only make things more difficult for him? The fact that Zero didn't bother to refute all that motivated the pureblood even more. Yes, guilt was the only thing that might have an effect on the hunter right now.

"You're taking the easy way out! That's being a coward! And what about _me_?" Kaname demanded. "You have an obligation to me as well!"

_Did you not even realise it, Zero? Am I... am I not family as well?_

Zero could only blink at him. "Obligation? What obligation?" he asked numbly. Kaname would have rolled his eyes if he weren't that angry... that hurt.

"I've _fed _you, damnit! My blood has kept you sane for years! It had prolonged your life! You shouldn't waste it by just... throwing it away!"

Kaname wished for a large piece of metal in his hands that he could crush to bits, to work off some of the frustration that was tearing at him. It was like pulling fangs to get through to Zero right now! Thankfully, a faint glimmer of comprehension mixed with guilt started to appear in the dull amethyst eyes.

"I... thought you'd be glad you don't have to anymore..." he mumbled. Unwelcome realisation was sinking in whether he wanted it to or not. Anger had dissipated. Zero felt the faint prickling of shame stabbing at him and sending colour into his pale and drawn cheeks. Kaname was right and he knew it - choosing to give up like this was the coward's way out. Zero didn't feel he had a right to live anymore but... how would Yuko, Ichiru and Isamu feel if they had to bury another parent now? He wouldn't have a chance to see them take the journey to parenthood, he wouldn't have the chance to see and hold their children, he wouldn't be able to partake in their joy.

Kaname was also right in saying that Zero hadn't spared a thought for him. Like it or not, the pureblood _had _invested a good part of himself in Zero's life. He was a pureblood - his very blood was sacred. Zero wasn't ignorant of the immense privilege he held in able to drink Kaname's blood whenever he needed it. He just thought that it was only for Yuuki's sake. After all, the pureblood had never offered him his blood until after his sister had made her choice all those years ago.

Kaname saw the dawning awareness in Zero's dull eyes and nodded his head grimly.

"You have so much more to live for, Zero. I wouldn't have let you bite me if I hadn't thought that... but it wasn't only for Yuuki's sake. It was also for yours."

The guilty flush in Zero's cheeks deepened and Kaname quickly pressed the very slight advantage he had gained. It was the only weapon he had left and he hoped it was strong enough. It had always been but now, he wasn't so sure.

"You need my blood," he said quietly. "Take it. For Yuuki's sake. For your children's. Take it, Zero. Please."

Zero's dull eyes did not light up but he hesitated and that one slight action caused knee-weakening relief to sweep through Kaname. He finally let go of Zero's shoulders. One hand went swiftly up to his tie, long fingers reaching for the knot in the length of silk and tugging it loose. In the next second, his jacket fell to the floor and all the buttons of his shirt were undone, his movements so fast they were blurred. By the time Zero blinked, Kaname had already tugged the collar of his shirt away from his neck, exposing his pale chest and the slender, tempting column of flesh that thousands would kill to just taste.

Kaname placed his hand over his neck and looked meaningfully at Zero. The hunter immediately shook his head.

"No..." he breathed. "No, Kaname, I don't want to-"

Kaname's lips tightened at this apparently pointless denial. He drew a fingernail decisively over his bite area and braced himself, every fiber of his being already taut with expectant delight. He hadn't had to worry about the scent of his spilled blood for years now, thanks to Aido's genius. When Zero's eyes didn't immediately turn crimson, true fear gripped Kaname for the second time. The amethyst eyes still had a clouded, apathetic look to them as Zero continued to shake his head in denial. After what felt like an excruciatingly long moment, he sucked in a trembling breath and those dull eyes finally morphed into red. Kaname let out the breath he had unconsciously been holding but it wasn't over yet - Zero wasn't about to give up without a fight. With a strangled sound that was part groan and part sob, he turned away and wrapped his arms around himself.

"No... go away!" he gasped. Kaname hissed again in frustration. The cut at his neck was already healing even though it was a deep one and he had to act fast. Quickly, he stepped forward, determined to put his neck right at Zero's lips if it came to that. When Zero felt Kaname's hands on his shoulders, he knocked them away.

"Damnit, Kaname!" he cried brokenly. "Don't! I - I shouldn't be wanting this! Not... not anymore..."

The last word was telling to Kaname and hope leapt in his heart. He drew in a shaky breath and waited... and waited... feeling the ticklish sensation of his blood slowly trickling down his neck. Zero choked softly as he fought his hunger, hating the dull insistent throb in his grown fangs. He tried to think of Yuuki. She was dead but he was still alive. They had buried her just a couple of hours ago while he... he had years, perhaps centuries of life ahead of him and no one to live them out by his side. He shouldn't be lusting after Kaname's blood like this! He shouldn't be interested in anything anymore!

But the siren call of Kaname's blood was too strong, too beguiling and Zero had grown too used to it by now to deny himself any longer. He was furious. He was starving. With unexpected speed, Zero swung around and launched himself at Kaname, hands reaching out to grasp the pureblood's shoulders. He was aiming straight for that beautifully tempting neck and the glorious elixir it contained, droplets of which were already making their way from the closing cut. Zero's weight sent Kaname staggering backwards, stopping only when his lower back met the side of the desk. With his legs on either side of Zero's hips, Kaname embraced the sobbing hunter and threw his head back and to the left.

Zero always bit him on the right side. _Always _the right side.

Kaname shivered with unconcealed delight as Zero's wet tongue traced hurried and shaky trails on his broken skin. Nothing affected him as much as Zero's touch and bite did. Then a familiar pair of fangs were driving deep into his sensitised flesh and Kaname uttered a surprised gasp of delight, knees again going weak almost instantly. His whole body was rejoicing in its close contact with the hunter, his heart was beating joyfully inside his chest. Right now, Zero was in his arms and his fangs were buried in his flesh - nothing could top this. _Nothing. _Fear of Zero leaving him had disappeared for now and Kaname was only conscious of a warm ache in his chest that made his eyes smart. It was OK... he was still useful... he was still needed.

Kaname didn't care one bit that this was the only thing Zero needed him for. It was enough. It _was_. He gave in to the trembles that shook his body but when a soft sob escaped his trembling lips, he quickly clamped his mouth shut. Zero didn't hear that. He was concerned only with the sweet crimson nectar flooding his mouth and setting his senses on fire. He drank the rich liquid deeply, almost greedily. Zero wasn't injured this time but the stress of the past few weeks had taken their toll on him and his body craved the surge of energy and power Kaname's blood always brought him. He couldn't deny his hunger anymore and Kaname knew it.

"Drink, Zero. I want you to want this," he whispered. "I want you to go on living."

_For Yuuki... for your children... and for me. Please, Zero... for me too._

Zero shook his head in protest and the feel of his fangs moving inside his flesh were more than enough to send sensation after sensation of shivery pleasure radiating out from Kaname's sensitive neck. He uttered a muted groan and tightened his arms around Zero.

_Oh God, I love it when you bite me like this..._

"I don't want to want this!" Zero insisted rather intelligibly. Kaname closed his eyes.

"But I want you to. Shh..." he whispered. His earlier anger had evaporated and in its place was supreme contentment and relief that his blood still held its allure for the hunter. Zero fell silent after that but he continued to drink almost sulkily, swamped by both guilt and delight. It had been _weeks _since he last fed from Kaname and that last time had been a hurried affair, cut abruptly short when a panicky Yuko had knocked on the door because Yuuki had almost passed out while washing the dishes after dinner. Zero truly hadn't realised until now how much his body had needed Kaname's blood to combat the stress of the past couple of months or so. It not only brought that familiar surge of energy, healing and rejuvenation but the feeling that nothing was insurmountable... that everything was possible.

But it wasn't, Zero's heart cried out in protest. _She _was gone, therefore the will to want to live on was wrong! He shouldn't be feeling this way, it was unforgivable! But when he was gulping down Kaname's blood and breathing in his familiar scent, it was so hard to stop. He continued to crave Kaname's blood like a drug even though the reason for remaining sane was gone. He was indebted to Kaname for this and right now, it was frighteningly more important than the want to join Yuuki in her eternal rest. Reason was fighting with despair and Zero couldn't handle both at the same time. Desperately, he closed his mind to the clash of mind and heart and instead, drank deeper to forget.

Kaname was aware that Zero was draining him rapidly but as always he refused to stop the hunter even when his legs started to tremble. After a couple of minutes, his head started spinning as well. He tried to remain strong and detached but it felt like years since he had held the hunter close like this. Zero wasn't letting up either and the delicious sensation of his lips moving against that sensitised neck made Kaname's body shake with longing and inevitable arousal. It was increasingly hard to control himself and he finally let out a soft moan. He felt lightheaded, shaky and aroused... almost helpless.

This time, Zero heard that moan. With a belated sense of shock, he realised he had given in to his vampire side once again, just after he had decided he wouldn't. A hot flush of guilt and humiliation stained his cheeks and Zero hurriedly slid his fangs free, earning yet another delighted shudder from his benefactor. Kaname's body mourned the loss of those fangs even as his brain registered faint relief. He was dizzy and had been embarrassingly close to feeling faint, something he knew would push Zero even further away. The hunter had never been proud of being reminded that he was a vampire in the first place.

Kaname's eyes blinked open and he shivered upon seeing Zero's bloodstained mouth, the amethyst eyes still retaining a faint reddish hue. As Kaname stared wordlessly at him, Zero realised he was still standing in the circle of the pureblood's arms and worse still, right between his legs. Quickly, he stepped back but Kaname's arms around his back prevented it.

"Uhm..." Zero started uneasily and Kaname quickly dropped his gaze and released him. He had to before he pulled the hunter even closer. Zero quickly took a step back, now feeling a strange reluctance to do so.

"Hey, you all right?" he asked softly. Kaname nodded but it was a few moments before he could compose himself enough to look up again.

"Yes, I - I'm fine." he murmured distractedly, wishing that Zero would wipe his mouth clean. Or better yet, allow him to do it with his tongue...

Kaname's gaze directed so intensely at his mouth was disturbing to Zero to say the least. He quickly licked his lips self consciously, making Kaname suppress another groan. It was moments like this when Zero couldn't help wondering if Kaname wanted to take his blood in return. Granted, his blood wasn't that powerful and in all likelihood didn't taste as good as a noble's but being the only person in the immediate vicinity... But as always, Zero didn't offer. He didn't think he could ever be as generous as the pureblood in this matter. The pain of the bite that changed his life was still much too real to him even though it had happened years ago.

Kaname straightened up cautiously, putting his weight on one leg at a time to ensure they were strong enough to hold his weight. The last thing he wanted was an undignified tumble onto the floor. Zero turned away, looking a little embarrassed as he usually did after a feeding. Slowly, Kaname used his handkerchief to clean away the slight stains on his healing neck. Zero had pulled away before licking the wounds closed and the pureblood was a little surprised to find his linen shirt miraculously unstained. It was proof that Zero had grown skilled at drinking cleanly over the years but to be honest, Kaname had been prepared for a rather messy affair this time. He eyed the hunter's back speculatively as he redid his buttons and picked his jacket off the floor, subconsciously repressing his own need for blood. It wasn't really that difficult, not after years of denying himself. He just needed to swallow a mouthful of blood tablets once he was safely inside his limo and he would be fine...

A familiar, slightly awkward silence had descended. It continued as Zero shoved his hands into his trouser pockets and wondered what to say. There was no mistaking how Kaname had reacted earlier which was one of the reasons why Zero never asked him outright for his blood. The pureblood's reactions always made him... uncomfortable. When a minute had passed in the same silence, Zero finally turned around.

"Thank you, Kaname" he murmured. "Are... you sure you don't mind?"

The pureblood looked surprised at this.

"Do you mean if I mind giving you my blood?" he clarified. When Zero nodded hesitantly, Kaname relaxed, feeling a smile appear on his face.

"I never have, Zero," he replied sincerely. Zero blinked at that but decided that the pureblood was just being diplomatic. He dipped his head and gave Kaname a sideways glance.

"I uh, took rather a lot..." he mumbled and the smile on Kaname's face widened.

"Take as much as you want," he whispered.

_Don't you know, Zero? I'm all yours..._

Zero gave a nod and shrug and another awkward pause followed. Kaname finally cleared his throat.

"What about you? Will you be all right now?" he asked. Zero grimaced; he knew what the pureblood meant.

"I... yeah," he said reluctantly, his voice still a little husky from swallowing that powerful, warm blood. "Well, no. But Yuko and the boys... I haven't forgotten - just that - Yuuki, she would have-" He broke off and inhaled carefully, feeling the treacherous tears prick at his eyes again. Kaname quickly reached out a hand and grasped his shoulder.

"I know you loved her, Zero," he said softly and carefully, "but I also know she would want you to be strong."

Zero didn't answer but slowly. he turned around and raised his head.

"I don't know if I can," he whispered. A single tear trickled down his cheek and Zero wiped it away with the back of his hand. "I miss her so, so much..."

He would never see her again. He would never get to hold her or love her.

"I feel so alone now," he whispered, his tone desolate, raw. Kaname nodded, feeling his throat constrict. He missed Yuuki too; her gentle presence, he understanding smile... She had been the one warmth in his life for many years before he found room in his heart for another. Zero wasn't the only one suffering.

"I know," Kaname said quietly, feeling his eyes grow moist. "but you'll get through this, Zero. We all will... in time."

Zero couldn't speak but he reached up to squeeze Kaname's hand on his shoulder, making the pureblood's heart leap in sudden joy.

"Thank you," Zero murmured and the quick brief smile he gave then was slight but sincere. There was a bit more colour in his cheeks now and Kaname took heart in that.

"Do you want to come stay with me for a while?" he asked impulsively. His apartment was huge. Besides, the children didn't stay at the school now and Kaname didn't want Zero to be all alone. His heart gave a sudden throb of longing - all right, _he _didn't want to be alone either. It would be pure heaven to have Zero near him, to join him for meals and to just... be with him. To know that he was sleeping in the next room. To know that he wouldn't have to hop on a plane just to see Zero's face or pick up the phone just to hear his voice.

But as Kaname had already half expected, Zero shook his head, his lips twisting wryly.

"You don't have to baby me, Kaname," he said. "I'm not gonna throw myself off a cliff."

"But... will you be OK here?" Kaname asked quickly even though he knew he shouldn't. Zero nodded.

"Yup. I... still have uh, some things to catch up on."

Zero didn't sound as confident as he wanted to because he didn't actually have anything to do. Despite the amount of time off he had taken, he wasn't keen on getting back to work right away. The Hunters Association hadn't quibbled about giving him another month off since they didn't want to lose one of the best senior hunters on their payroll. Kaname hesitated. The holes in his neck had already healed and his head had thankfully stopped spinning as well but he was still loathe to leave before extracting one more thing from Zero. To his everlasting relief, the hunter saw the question in his eyes and answered it with his trademark honesty.

"I'll try to live on, Kaname," he said. "You're right, I know that Yuuki would - I... well, I'll try. I promise."

The last two words were what Kaname had been waiting for. He reassured himself it was the best he could hope for as Zero saw him to the door. Kaname wanted to stay longer but he had put a lot of his work on hold for the past couple of months and needed to catch up. He was just about to get into the limo when Zero suddenly called to him.

"Hey..."

When Kaname turned around expectantly, Zero nodded at him.

"Don't overwork yourself, OK?" he said with a hint of a smile in his voice. "I know you still will but well... don't overdo it."

A smile trembled on Kaname's supple lips and lit up his dark eyes.

"I promise," he echoed Zero's words solemnly and both men shared a brief smile, knowing that Kaname meant pureblood standards and not human ones. Zero offered a slight wave as the limousine slid away. He had once thought the pureblood cold and ruthless many years ago but then he had been blinded by prejudice and fear. Now he knew he was wrong. Kaname had always treated him with respect and grace, grace that he felt was little deserved after that embarrassing ranting earlier on. Kaname had been suffering too yet he was still the stronger one of the two.

Zero couldn't help musing if that was because Kaname had someone special to live for. In any case, Zero knew he now had none... and the house was as silent as ever when he finally closed the door.

- o -

Once safely in the car, Kaname swallowed the tablets with mineral water from the mini cooler; he never cared for carbonated drinks since they tended to make him choke. He was more relieved than he realised to hear Zero's promise and to know what it meant for him personally. Kaname knew he couldn't always be with Zero and his family in person but he never had to depend on phone calls to know how they were doing. He always made sure they were kept safe especially the silver haired hunter who took his life in his hands everytime he went on a mission. With the same tentative hope uncurling in his heart once more, Kaname closed his eyes and offered a silent prayer to his beloved sister.

_Don't worry, Yuuki dear. I will keep him safe, I promise._

-- Chapter End --


	5. Chapter 5: The Invitation

**Author Notes: **Surprised that I managed to update? So am I! Guess the muse is raring to go LOL. My apologies in advance if this chapter is boring but things will start to pick up in the next chapter onwards _-smiles-_ Enjoy!

-- Chapter Start --

Yuko and her brothers stayed at Cross Academy for a couple more days but reluctantly left at Zero's insistence. He didn't want them constantly hovering around him as if he were senile and in need of a helping hand or worse, as if he were going to blow his brains out with Bloody Rose at the first opportunity. He might have considered it that day but not now. Not after realising what it would do to his children and not after his promise to Kaname. Yuko had also wanted to ease her father's sorrow by clearing out her mother's clothes and things from her closet and drawers but Zero wouldn't let her, saying that they would do it together. Perhaps later when the pain was not so new, so raw, so... devastating.

There was such a yearning look in Zero's amethyst eyes as he stared at Yuuki's dresses hanging in her wardrobe that Yuko's heart ached fiercely. She could smell the gentle perfume of her mother's scent clinging to those clothes and could only imagine what it must be doing to her father. Yuko loved her mother too of course, as much as her brothers did but she was aware that her father's love for Yuuki went that much deeper. With a visible effort, Zero closed the closet doors firmly and left the room without another word. Yuko swallowed. She reached behind her and felt her hand instantly enveloped in a familiar warmth.

"I'm worried about papa, Tomi," she whispered and felt his arm go around her waist in a comforting hug.

"I know, my dear," he sighed. "My parents would be more than glad to have him stay with them but-"

Yuko turned to offer her husband a sad smile.

"But he said no… as we knew he would."

Tomi wrapped both arms around her and rested his chin on her hair.

"He'll get through this, Yuko. We just have to be patient."

- o -

The Assistant Headmistress of Cross Academy had been promoted to Head when Yuuki couldn't take on her duties anymore. The former was a capable woman who was very diplomatic about using the office since it was situated in the Chairman's quarters where Zero lived. She took care never to intrude on his personal space. Hence, after his children left, Zero had plenty of time on his hands and no one to spend it with. He let his memories fill his hours as he went through each day, or rather night, weathering its daily monotony with stoic persistance, broken only with hours spent in the school gym, exhausting himself so that he would be able to sleep a couple of hours after that. Cross Academy was filled with students going to day and night classes but the bustle and noise seemed muted and distant as if Zero were in an almost sound proofed bubble that kept him apart from everyone else. He avoided the cafeteria and instead, cooked simple meals for himself with his usual efficiency but without an iota of enthusiasm. He ate even less than he cooked. He had promised Kaname that he would live on and keep his promise he would... but he didn't recall promising to be in the best of health.

Still, Zero wasn't totally alone. His family called him; Yuko every evening after dinner, Kaname an hour or two after that and the twins on alternate days. Zero was almost tempted to think they were of the opinion that if they disturbed him enough, he would be more willing to live on. A couple of work colleagues and friends also called to invite him out for drinks but he turned them down.

Kaname was completely unfazed by Zero's initial monosyllabic responses in the first couple of weeks. The pureblood persisted in making those nightly calls even though Zero told him - in as acerbic a tone as he could muster - that he was in exactly the same state of health that he was in yesterday and the day before that and the day before that one. Kaname had only laughed softly and replied that the negligible expense of a few telephone calls was well worth hearing Zero sounding a little more like himself again. The latter had smiled faintly at that and he had the strangest feeling that Kaname somehow knew he had.

None of them called in the morning, being vampires. To Zero, it was just as well because he had a very special appointment that he faithfully kept every morning. It would be more comfortable for him to come at night, of course. But Yuuki had loved the early morning sunlight and as always, he wanted to please her. This thought never failed to surface in Zero's mind each morning and a sad smile would quiver on his lips as he slowly made his way amongst the neatly arranged tombstones to her grave. After all, the early morning sun was so gentle on his skin that it felt almost like a warm caress. Zero made sure he woke up early each morning despite the few hours of sleep he had and would stop by the florist before going on to the cemetery.

He didn't mind waking up early. He didn't mind the morning sun. He didn't mind the solitary walk. He didn't mind spending hours at the side of his beloved. Not at all.

- o -

Kaname walked with his usual quiet as he made his way past the tombstones, his designer sunglasses perched firmly on his nose. He was careful to mute his aura since he wanted to observe Zero unawares and hence had told his driver to wait for him outside the main gates of the cemetery. Kaname's bite area in his neck had long grown used to the hunter's fangs and it signalled its owner whenever Zero was near. True enough, Kaname soon spotted the hunter sitting cross legged beside Yuuki's grave with one hand resting on her tombstone. A bunch of yellow daisies lay on the mound which had sprouted a thin layer of young grass.

Despite the morning light, Kaname slipped off his sunglasses to drink his fill of the heart warming sight. It had only been a month but he missed Zero. He missed him very much. He had intended to fly back two weeks ago but the backlog of work he had to plow through didn't permit it, even though he kept both rest and meals to a strict minimum. It wasn't that he had forgotten his promise to Zero not to overwork himself but he knew his limits. Besides, Kaname had planned to catch up on his sleep on the way here and he had done just that, partly because his body sorely needed the rest and partly because he didn't want to while the hours away fruitlessly getting himself excited at the prospect of laying eyes on Zero again.

Kaname had called the hunter every night to hear his voice and to gauge his mood. He was reassured to note that Zero's replies had improved from dully voiced monosyllables in the first week to short sentences in the second and finally to more normal sounding dialog last week. The fragile hope in Kaname's heart grew a little more each day as did the longing to see him again. And now that he was here, Kaname crept a little closer. He could see that Zero's mouth was moving as if he was speaking. Since there was no one about, it was obvious all his words were meant for the gentle soul resting here. Kaname found himself blinking away unbidden tears. Here was further proof of Zero's love for his sister if he ever had cause to doubt it. Despite what it meant to his own heart, Kaname couldn't help a surge of fierce satisfaction that Yuuki had at least had a life filled with love and happiness even if it was a short one.

Without really meaning to listen in, Kaname stepped closer and focused on the softly spoken words. Zero was reminiscing about the past, about the many happy moments he and Yuuki had shared. He skipped from one incident to another seemingly at random. Kaname caught a couple of anecdotes about Yuko's escapades when she was young; one of them being caught one morning sleeping soundly in her grandfather's bed and still sucking on her thumb. They had just celebrated Touga Yagari's birthday the night before and little Yuko had taken more than one sip of the champagne from her mother's glass. Both Zero and Yuuki had been puzzled and even a little panicky when they couldn't find their two year old in her room or anywhere else the next morning. They had finally knocked on their father's room door in desperation and a resigned looking Cross had opened it.

At this point, Zero smiled. Kaname couldn't help echoing the smile partly because of the wistful look on Zero's face and partly because he had a fairly accurate guess as to what was coming next. He wasn't wrong and Zero even chuckled a bit when he continued the story. Cross had pulled the door open wider to reveal Yuko sleeping on his bed with a shirtless Yagari lounging beside her. When he saw them, he crossed his legs and muttered something about having his 'birthday present ruined by a sleeping toddler' in a miffed tone, the gruff words offset by the gentle way his large calloused hand was caressing Yuko's fine silver hair as she slept on. Cross had flushed deeply and hushed him on the spot, Yuuki had gone into one of her merry peals of laughter and Zero had flushed as deeply as Cross while wishing himself elsewhere.

Kaname gazed at Zero now and treasured the smile on his face for its rareness. Soon enough, it faded and Zero continued speaking.

"Guess it was payback for how panicky we must have made Father feel that one morning huh, dearest? When I told him you had spent the night in my bed?"

Kaname's eyebrows rose a little at this revelation. It sounded like it had happened before Zero and Yuuki were married. He listened attentively as the hunter continued.

"I remember thinking how stupid I was for blurting that out. I remember thinking that Kaname would kill me if he ever found out."

At those words, Kaname swallowed hard. He couldn't deny that he had always been fiercely protective of his younger sister who was very innocent in many ways. He would likely have hurt Zero if he _had _found out and the realisation made the pureblood shiver. If he had injured Zero because of that incident, would he have regretted his actions? No... the truth was that he wouldn't have. Because Kaname wasn't in love with Zero then and perhaps this painful one sided love would never have happened. Right at this moment, Kaname didn't know if he should be thankful or not that it had turned out this way. Zero had fallen silent but his eyes were soft and unfocused as if he was still lost in his past.

"I'm sorry it sounded like I'd betrayed you, dearest. I guess... I just wanted to know if Father's love for one angry human boy turned vampire was strong enough to weather anything... even if we both know nothing much happened that night."

At those words, Kaname's lips parted in soft awe. Zero had not only honour but strength, physically as well as mentally. He had to be to have successfully fought his vampire urges for four years. He was strong, steadfast, loyal and honest to a fault. A wave of sudden longing for this wonderful person swelled in Kaname's heart. Thankful. Yes, he was thankful that he hadn't known what had happened then. He was thankful that nothing had befallen Zero Kiryuu and that he now knew what it was like to love someone other than Yuuki, even if nothing might ever come out of it. But - and Kaname inhaled softly as the ache in his heart swelled - he so, so wanted Zero to learn to love him too, the way he had loved Yuuki.

Zero had fallen silent again and even though Kaname waited, there were no more stories forthcoming. The smile on the hunter's face disappeared as his fingertips gently traced his late wife's name carved into the smooth marble.

"I miss you, dearest," he murmured. "So much... every second of everyday. I wish... well, I won't say that anymore because I promised Kaname. Yes, dearest, I promised him... but I just... don't know what to do now..." His voice trailed away and he lifted a hand to rub at his eyes. "I have too much time on my hands now. You know, when I think of all those missions that kept me away, how I could only stay a couple of days before I had to leave again-"

Zero broke off and shifted, drawing his knees up and resting his forehead on them to hide the tears that were flowing again. How he regretted all those hours spent away from his beloved. Of course, it was easier in hindsight to say what one could have done... but it didn't make the pain any easier to bear. Kaname felt his heart squeeze again. He too, regretted not being with his sister more often than he had but other than his work commitments, he also didn't want to intrude on their precious family time. He also didn't want them to how truly and pathetically lonely he was. Kaname started a little as he heard Zero's soft voice again. The hunter had lifted his head and dashed a hand across his eyes.

"Life has no meaning now even though I will try to live on," he whispered sadly. "Yuko... Ichiru and Isamu - they're as dear to me as ever but they're grown up now. They don't need me to hold their hand or listen to their nightmares or-" He broke off and shivered as he found himself once again staring into an abyss of forever, of living for a long, long time fortified on pure blood and no one to live for.

"There's no one to care for anymore..." he whispered so softly that Kaname had to strain his ears. Luckily, the gentle breeze brought the scent of Zero, the daisies and the words to him. Kaname found himself breathing just a little faster. Was it possible that Zero was starting to think of his future, at least a little? Was it possible that his small, slight hope, nurtured throughout the years would really have a chance now? Kaname had to stop himself from going over right now to pull the grieving hunter into his arms and demand to stay by his side.

_You _have _someone to care for, Zero - I've waited... and waited..._

But Zero shook his head then.

"There's no one I could ever care for," he whispered and Kaname felt the hope crumble inside him. No, it wasn't time yet. But he would wait. A determined light glowed in Kaname's dark eyes. He took a deep breath and composed himself then gradually unshielded his aura. It took only a moment before Zero had turned around, a little startled but not in the least bit alarmed. Kaname smiled quietly and stepped forward.

- o -

"Hey..." Zero's smile was wan but Kaname drank in the sight greedily, his keen eyes noting the shadows under those beautiful amethyst eyes, the hollows in those cheekbones. Zero was only an inch shorter than him but he had always been well built due to his hunter training. He was noticeably leaner now as though he had lost weight or had not been eating well or getting enough sleep. Kaname knew the signs all too well; he had never considered food or rest important but Zero wasn't him. Zero didn't have a pureblood's capacity in this matter. Perhaps it was time to issue that invitation again... and hope like crazy that it would be accepted this time.

"Zero," Kaname replied quietly. "How are you?"

He crouched down beside the hunter and pretended that his entire body wasn't quiveringly aware of the hunter. Zero shrugged, not in a hurry to go anywhere. He let his gaze rest on the enormous bouquet of white roses that Kaname was laying gently on Yuuki's grave. The pureblood was as smartly attired as ever in a fine caramel coloured linen suit. Zero couldn't help musing if he had ever seen Kaname in anything less formal than a shirt and trousers.

"You should know, you call me everyday," he replied dryly, glancing at the pureblood on his right. Kaname looked at him and just smiled. Zero blinked. He knew just how very good looking his brother-in-law was but the sheer power of Kaname's dazzling smile could still take him by surprise once in a while. Well, it was probably because neither of them had had any reason to smile in a good long while.

"Just making polite conversation," Kaname returned smoothly. Zero rolled his eyes but returned the smile. Kaname had wanted to ask if he came here everyday but it was already so obvious that the question would just sound stupid. Hence, the two men stayed there in a companionable silence for a while. Yuuki's grave was situated at a prime spot under a large and shady sakura tree so both of them were spared direct sunlight and the morning breeze was still cool enough to feel comfortable. Zero had taken to gazing off into the distance again so after a couple of minutes, Kaname stood up. Zero glanced up and stood up reluctantly, dusting off the seat of his jeans and unwittingly drawing the pureblood's attention to his lean hips and long denim clad legs.

"Zero," Kaname began carefully. "I'm going to visit one of my subsidiaries in Europe the day after tomorrow. They've run into a problem and need my help. Seiren's fretting because she's in the US taking care of other business and can't accompany me like she usually does. If you don't mind, would you - perhaps - consider accompanying... me..."

Kaname found himself stumbling to a stop and cursed inwardly. The words had been thought out and neatly arranged inside his head but the moment he said them aloud, it seemed as if his motive was as transparent as glass. Zero had already opened his mouth to reply and Kaname quickly held up a hand.

"I don't mean as a bodyguard per se," he added quickly. "But you did attend the necessary training for it and Seiren wouldn't keep insisting on wanting to fly back so... I thought-"

_Oh,_ very _articulately put, Kuran. It sounds like you're unable to manage your own bodyguard!_

Kaname very nearly cursed out loud. It was completely laughable how his usual eloquence flew right out the window where this hunter was concerned. There was now a wry twist to Zero's lips that Kaname recognised all too well. It was the same look the hunter gave whenever he suspected Kaname was going to say or do something he knew he wouldn't like.

"_Seiren _would be happy to have me accompany you?" he asked and snorted lightly at that. Seiren, that silent, slightly eerie and very loyal shadow of Kaname's who took her duties so seriously that no one else would ever dare aspire to take over her position?

Zero didn't ask that last question aloud but he didn't have to. Kaname read the meaning clearly in those amethyst eyes. He chuckled lightly, feeling suddenly carefree... almost... happy.

"It would be better than no one at all," he said candidly. "She trusts you, Zero."

It wasn't obvious to anyone else but Kaname could sense the very slight relief in Seiren whenever he announced that he was going back to Cross Academy. It was as if that place and its people there had her approval... at least in terms of his safety. Zero resisted rolling his eyes.

"Was that meant to be a compliment?" he shot back and Kaname smiled again.

"Coming from her, it is and you know it."

Zero had to crack a wry grin at that.

"You don't need a bodyguard, Kaname. I know it's just so I won't mope around but-"

Kaname quickly shook his head.

"It's more for the company than anything else, Zero," he said quickly and truthfully. "You won't have to actually _do _anything..."

That wasn't exactly the right thing to say and Kaname knew that the moment the words left his mouth.

"You mean I'd just be lounging about in my hotel bed without a single thing to do?" Zero demanded. Kaname blinked away the unexpectedly erotic images that filled his mind and shook his head again, inwardly cursing for the third time.

"No - no, of course I don't mean that! But I'll only be in meetings for one night and we can perhaps... visit the city and take in some of the sights. There are a few good restaurants there..."

Zero didn't look any more pleased than before. "Vampire establishments that would no doubt think I'm your lackey or something."

Even though his voice lacked rancour, Kaname was quick to protest.

"I never saw you as beneath me in any way, Zero," he started but the hunter was already shaking his head.

"Forget it, Kaname," he said lightly. "I know that or you'd never have let me marry Yuuki."

The mere mention of her name made Zero turn to look back at her tombstone with a suddenly thoughtful expression. He looked like he was silently asking her advice. Kaname held his breath and felt his heart start its inconvenient pounding again. Was it it possible that Zero just might accept his invitation no matter how badly he had put it? He waited silently, outwardly composed and at ease but a complete shaking mess inside, feeling as if everything hinged on the hunter's reply.

Zero wasn't at all keen to go but he remembered Yuuki saying more than once that she wished they could accompany Kaname on his trips. Despite his bodyguard, first class accomodations and packed schedule, it was obvious that her elder brother was still lonely. Very much so, judging from the melancholic look that would occasionally fill his eyes whenever he thought no one was looking. Zero had pacified her by promising that they would do so one day but there was always something to prevent that - his hunter missions, the running of the school, their children...

And Kaname had never asked. Not even once.

With an unexpected pang in his heart, Zero realised that despite his and Yuuki's resolve, it turned out that they had never accompanied Kaname anywhere after all. He didn't know if it was because of any inherent danger that the trips would pose for his family if they had but Kaname had never proposed and the years had slipped by so fast. With that realisation, a hot surge of shame mixed with a desire to please Yuuki prompted Zero to make a spontaneous decision on the spot. He turned back to Kaname before he could change his mind.

"Well, if you really don't mind then... yeah, why not?"

Kaname's brown eyes widened with shock. He had to put a tight rein on his suddenly galloping heart lest its uncharacteristic beating alerted the hunter to how strangely it was acting.

"Thank you," Kaname murmured as soon as he found his voice, slightly breathless though it was. "I - as my bodyguard, you'll be given a room next to mine. You won't have to do a thing of course - it's all just for- I mean..."

Zero grinned unexpectedly, fisting his right hand and punching the pureblood lightly in the shoulder.

"You're babbling, Kaname. I already said I'll go, didn't I? You don't have to thank me for it!"

The genuine affection in Zero's voice spread much needed warmth through Kaname's heart. He reveled in it but had to quickly dip his head as the warmth spreaded tellingly to his cheeks. Oh, for the love of - ! He was an alpha male in the vampire world! He was a pureblood prince! He _shouldn't _be feeling this way, so uncertain of one person yet so dependent on him at the same time. But Kaname knew that he was and hence doomed to suffer all the confidence crushing emotions of one in the throes of their first crush. Perhaps it was because Zero was indeed his first crush but the knowledge didn't stop him from suffering all the delirious feelings that came with it.

Kaname wanted so much to love Zero Kiryuu with all he had... but the natural male urge of wanting to take and possess the one he loved was warring with the equally strong yet contradictory urge of wanting to be loved, possessed and taken by him. It was all very confusing to say the least but Kaname knew he was very clear on one thing - he wanted to belong to Zero the way his sister had.

Wholly and completely.

Heart, body and soul.

-- Chapter End --


	6. Chapter 6: The Slip

**Author Notes: **I am as always inspired by **Blackened Wing**'s amazing stories and most of the time go around thinking her universe is the canon one! _-grins-_ So the idea about Kaname being a business tycoon and Zero pretending to be his bodyguard is from her imagination. Thanks, Vani dear! _-hugs-_

OK everyone, here is the next chapter with a very minor cliffie at the end _-innocent smile- _The next chapter will definitely need some work. Thank you again for all your wonderful reviews and I hope you continue to follow this story. Enjoy this chapter!

-- Chapter Start --

Two days later, Kaname and Zero flew to Europe in one of the former's private jets. They arrived at their destination at a quarter past five on a cold, dark and drizzly morning. Unsurprisingly, the staff at the small private airport were already on hand with large umbrellas to whisk them to a waiting limousine and they were driven to their hotel without delay. It was a large and modern vampire-run establishment Kaname had stayed at a couple of times before. Seiren usually took the room next to his sans adjoining doors but this trip was different because Zero would be coming along. With that thought in mind and a giddy mix of guilt, excitement and hope coursing inside him, Kaname told his secretary to book two adjoining rooms.

The half an hour ride to the hotel was as uneventful as the plane one had been. Zero appeared lost in his thoughts, spending most of it gazing out of the car window beside him even though little could be seen through the drizzle. Kaname sat beside him and remained quiet as well, glancing at the hunter from time to time. Perhaps Zero was thinking of Yuuki again or regretting his rash decision to come along? Well, it was too late to turn back now. Kaname's shoulders squared under the silk shirt he wore. Zero was here now and that was good enough for him. The pureblood was determined to enjoy every moment of the hunter's company, whether he chose to be taciturn or talkative... although if this was any indication the former was more likely, Kaname thought wryly.

At the hotel, they were received with the same efficient, respectful deference that the airport staff accorded them. Zero ignored the slightly shocked though polite nods he received. It wasn't at all common for purebloods to appoint vampire hunters as their bodyguards but Kaname calmly ignored the slight hints of uneasiness the staff displayed. As soon as they had checked in, they followed the hotel porter up one of the impressive lifts, Zero now gazing at the carpet under his shoes with his hands shoved into his trouser pockets. He only looked around at their plush surroundings when they arrived at their floor and were shown their rooms. Purebloods were of course attended to first and Kaname's leather suitcase was carefully deposited in the first room before the porter proceeded to switch on the lights and draw the curtains. They then went over next door where the porter put down Zero's smaller bag. He was about to prepare the room in the same manner when Kaname handed him a large tip, obviously wanting him to leave them alone. With a deep bow and profuse thanks, the porter obeyed immediately.

Kaname waited until they were alone before he turned around. Zero was currently frowning at a beautiful still water painting on the wall. Kaname took the opportunity to gaze at him for a little while longer, his eyes silently appreciating how good the hunter looked in his smart gray suit. He knew Zero didn't like wearing suits in general and was only adhering to social vampire customs expected of him - Kaname Kuran was a pureblood and hence, image was everything. This only made Kaname appreciate Zero's gesture even more. He allowed his eyes to trail slowly over unique silver hair, admiring how the soft shimmering strands complemented the light gray jacket, worn over a light yellow shirt. Kaname hadn't wanted to stare too much in the plane earlier; he had forced himself to go over the summary reports his secretary had packed for him. He wanted to clear as much work as possible so that he would be able to spend most of his time with Zero.

After half a minute or so, it was apparent that Zero was oblivious to his presence so Kaname finally spoke up. It was going to be dawn soon and he was tired but he wasn't quite ready to let go of the silent hunter's company just yet.

"The in-house restaurant downstairs is open twenty four hours," he remarked casually. "Shall we go down and find something to eat?"

Inwardly, Zero was berating himself for agreeing to come on this trip. It felt like he had been given a free first class ticket complete with swanky accommodation and absolutely nothing to contribute in return, just so that he wouldn't mope around at home and cause worry for others. A spoilt parasite was what he felt like. To make matters worse, he wouldn't be able to visit Yuuki for the next couple of mornings. It made a different kind of guilt swell in his heart and Zero abruptly turned around to face Kaname.

"I don't think I'll go down. Thanks," he refused shortly. Surprised disappointment flashed in Kaname's expressive eyes before he had a chance to hide it and that startled Zero. Wait - had the pureblood expected him to say yes?

__

Yuuki would have...

Out of nowhere came that thought and along with the reason why he was here in the first place.

"Uh, sorry. I'm just not hungry," Zero mumbled, trying to sound a little less guilty but feeling it even more when Kaname's gaze fell in that telling manner. _Crap. _Since when had he grown so adept at reading Kaname's feelings? After all, purebloods were masters of deception and his brother-in-law was no different, naturally skilled at hiding his feelings behind a calm, perfect mask. He had been that way even during his Cross Academy days, for heaven's sake! Or was it different now because Kaname didn't feel the need to put up a facade in front of someone who was practically family to him?

Zero's train of confused musings stopped when Kaname turned away.

"I see," he murmured over his shoulder. Something about the way those sculpted shoulders drooped beneath the well cut jacket pricked at Zero's conscience. He shouldn't bother, Kaname was probably just playing on his emotions but the hunter found himself opening his mouth anyway.

"So... you still going down?"

Kaname took a moment to compose himself. When he turned around again, his face was neutral. Devoid of expression.

"No," he replied softly. "I'll just call for room service then."

__

Like I do every single damned time I travel.

Kaname pushed aside that self pitying thought and told himself he was just being silly. Zero had a right to his own time as well and it wasn't fair to expect him to stick close to the pureblood for each second they spent at the hotel. That hadn't been part of the agreement. No, that had only been his silly, unrealistic, _pathetic _wish.

Zero blew out a sigh. The resigned tone in Kaname's soft voice was barely noticeable but it spoke volumes about far too many solitary meals... taken far too many times... over far too many years. This time, the guilt stabbed right at Zero's heart and it wasn't about abandoning Yuuki's grave but about not keeping Kaname company. Sure, the pureblood was a business tycoon, being alone practically came with the job and he was probably just putting on a show to get Zero to tag along but-

__

Oh, what the hell!

It still couldn't hide the fact that Kaname had sounded unbelievably lonely. Zero was here because he knew Yuuki would have wanted him to accompany Kaname. In fact, if she were here right now, she would have joined her brother without any hesitation and Zero would have joined her too, happy to go along with whatever made her happy. So why was he acting like a self-pitying hermit when it was that same guilt that had prompted him to come here in the first place? Zero stopped thinking before he changed his mind yet again.

"Let's go then. I'll have a drink while you eat," he offered in a rather awkward but sincere tone. Nothing was too much when it came to Yuuki and it wasn't as if he was going to be tortured or anything. For heaven's sake, it was just a meal... a meal that he wouldn't even have to pay for!

Soaring hope rushed through Kaname and he knew his eyes had betrayed him again when Zero's face registered surprise at his reaction. Kaname found that it was far more difficult to hide his feelings from the hunter now, compared to when Yuuki was still alive. It was pathetic but somehow... he found that he didn't really care either. He didn't care that Zero's offer had to be made solely out of pity and nothing else. He was starving for any form of attention from the hunter and he would take whatever crumbs he could get and with gratitude.

"Thank you, Zero," Kaname murmured as the grateful warmth spread a welcome glow in his heart.

- o -

The twenty four hour dining room was at the moment empty of diners, something they were both thankful for. Kaname was especially happy that he could relax and enjoy a meal with Zero without having to act as if the latter were his bodyguard. Right now, it was just the unobtrusive waiters and the two of them. The setting brought a return of his appetite and Kaname scanned the menu with something very close to happiness.

"What would you like, Zero?" he asked a minute later and looked up to see the hunter frowning at the drinks section of the menu.

"Coffee," Zero said decidedly. Kaname's brows drew together in concern.

"At least try the soup. It's been hours since your last meal, hasn't it?" he encouraged gently but Zero only shook his head with that stubborn look his family members knew all too well settling on his handsome features.

"I'm not hungry," he muttered, sounding almost rebellious now. Kaname's heart dropped a little but he took a fortifying breath and soldiered on.

"You should eat something. I can tell you've lost weight," he said quietly. As expected, the frown turned into a glare and for a moment that took him back to the past, Kaname felt like they were rivals again at Cross Academy. Had almost thirty years really flown past? After all, Zero looked pretty much the same as he had then, only better filled out now... and more damned attractive than ever.

"Don't mother me, Kaname. I don't need that," Zero said shortly. His words were tersely spoken and Kaname was brought back to the present none too gently. He bit his lip, the rebuke in Zero's voice clawing at his fragile happiness and chasing away his appetite. Without another word, Kaname looked down at the menu again, trying to ignore the hurt in his heart. Well, what he had expected? That Zero would immediately order a steak, tuck into it with gusto and thank him for it? With a resigned sigh, the pureblood decided to forgo food as well but Zero cleared his throat at that moment and Kaname looked back up.

"Actually, the chowder sounds quite good. I think I'll have some," Zero remarked. There was a faint spark of interest in his voice and a very slight flush to his cheeks as if he was trying to make amends for his brusque words earlier. Kaname had to quickly look down again to hide the painful look of hope that he knew was showing in his eyes again. He really was unable to shield his thoughts and feelings from Zero, especially when it was just the two of them like now. But once again, he didn't care. With that same warmth stealing through his heart, Kaname decided to order the chowder as well.

The meal was quiet but the silence companionable. Kaname enjoyed his food a lot more than he usually did, his appetite greatly increased by seeing Zero enjoy his soup and even calling for a side order of fresh bread and salad for the two of them. They finished with coffee and tea before Kaname lifted his hand for the bill. In the same comfortable silence, they walked back to the lobby, took the lift up and went down the corridor towards their rooms. Zero was just fishing out his key card when Kaname stopped him with a light hand on his arm.

"Would you come in for a while?" the pureblood invited politely, indicating his own room door. Zero hesitated briefly before he nodded. There wasn't anything he wanted to chat with Kaname but it seemed ungrateful to refuse when they both knew he had nothing else to do.

"For a few minutes then," he agreed reluctantly, trying not to sound ungracious. He stepped in after Kaname and turned around to close the door.

"Then I think I'll catch up on the news before turning in," Zero added, more to reassure himself than anything else. There was no answer from Kaname. Zero turned around only to see the pureblood looking at him calmly as he shrugged out of his jacket and placed it neatly on the back of the desk chair beside him. He then tugged at the knot of his tie, slid the length of silk out from under his collar and draped it over his jacket. There was nothing at all to indicate he was doing anything other than getting comfortable but Zero knew that determined look in those dark eyes quite well by now. He started shaking his head.

"No. Not now, Kaname. I don't need it!" he protested, ignoring the sudden tingle of anticipation in his traitorous fangs. Kaname didn't bother to answer. His gaze was even. Measured. Unblinking. Slowly but deliberately, he started flicking the buttons on his silk shirt open one by one and Zero huffed, rolling his eyes. He placed his hands on his lips and glared at the implacable pureblood.

"It's only been a month - far too soon to drink again," he stated matter of factly. "I don't want to, Kaname."

"But I want you to, Zero," Kaname finally broke his silence with those persuasive words, his nimble fingers having reached the last button on his shirt. Unbidden, Zero found himself staring at that slender but toned chest, half exposed by the creamy panels of the silk shirt.

"Why? I'm neither thirsty nor injured!" Zero ground out exasperatedly, hating how his body was already reacting to the invitation. Kaname knew it too and a brief flare of triumph burned in his eyes as he glimpsed the twin points of gleaming ivory in the hunter's mouth. Zero was nothing if not stubborn though. He folded his arms and turned his head away, pointedly ignoring the pureblood and forcing himself to remain aloof, detached and even grimly amused at what Kaname was trying to do. If Zero didn't know any better, he was tempted to think the pureblood somehow _liked _his bite, as atrocious as the notion was.

So what was Kaname going to do this time, huh? Force him? Even that wasn't necessary. All Kaname had to do was slice that pretty neck of his and Zero would be on him like a starving beast being offered a hunk of meat. The hunter uttered a mirthless chuckle. That was what he was, after all. What they all were no matter how they tried to dress it up with fine suits and polite manners. No matter how many years had passed, Zero knew he would never get enough of the rich, sweet nectar his pureblood brother-in-law had flowing in his veins. It astounded him that as usual, Kaname was the one to offer his blood. But then he always did... Zero almost never had to ask.

__

Come to think of it, I don't think I ever did.

This one small realisation made Zero pause but his rising thirst was fast commanding all of his attention, tempted by the sight of Kaname's pale throat, beautifully framed by the parted collar of his shirt. Zero pressed his lips together and shook his head in frustration.

"You never play fair, do you?" he growled as his feet carried him to the waiting pureblood of their own accord. Surprisingly, the latter nodded.

"Not in this," he conceded as Zero stopped in front of him, an arresting sight with eyes blazing crimson and fangs fully extended.

"You don't _have _to be this generous, you know," he muttered, now sounding torn between anger and puzzlement. "It isn't easy to let someone bite you, Kaname. You don't have to..."

Kaname didn't want to hear anymore. The need to feel Zero's fangs in his flesh was not one borne of the wish to submit or even the urge to be generous but the pure and elemental longing to be useful and needed by the one he loved.

"Generosity has absolutely nothing to do with this," Kaname whispered and closed his eyes as Zero's lips latched onto his bite area. Even during the flight here, Kaname had been anticipating the hunter's next bite and he trembled visibly as familiar fangs claimed his neck again. Yes, Zero was right in that it had only been a month but at the same time, he was also wrong.

It had been too damned long.

Kaname held onto Zero tightly, his breaths coming out in fast, shallow pants as the hunter drank his fill. Truly, nothing on earth could feel better than this, the pureblood thought incoherently. Zero's warm tongue caressed his skin as it chased after a stray crimson droplet and Kaname moaned softly. He quickly clamped his mouth shut after that but when Zero pressed closer and drove his fangs in even deeper, Kaname gave a shaky gasp. His thoughts were splintering into a thousand pieces - the feel of Zero's muscled body pressing against his trembling one was doing all sorts of things to his normally impeccable control. Desire flared suddenly within him, sending fire racing through his blood as it travelled downwards and caused aching flesh to swell between his legs. Kaname quickly took a step back but thankfully, Zero was still struggling with his guilt and didn't notice. With a sharp inhalation, he controlled his hunger and yanked his fangs out, accidentally tearing the holes he had made and pulling a surprised cry from Kaname.

"Damnit!" Zero cried out, his fingers digging deep into the pureblood's shoulders. "Don't - I don't want this! It's not fair that I should live when - when -"

He shook his head and uttered a choked sound. Despite how unbelievably good Kaname's blood tasted, the guilt in him was churning the contents of his stomach. Kaname shook his head as well, distress at Zero's pain filling his eyes and momentarily dampening his ardour.

"Don't, Zero. It's not wrong to need blood," he protested. "Don't feel guilty about this. Please."

__

Don't feel guilty about needing me in whatever way. Yuuki would not want you to.

The words were unsaid but perhaps Zero had heard them or was feeling just too worn out and confused to think anymore. He exhaled tiredly and dropped his forehead onto Kaname's shoulder, his breaths coming out in ragged pants as he tried to control himself. Kaname held him close without hesitation, wondering why it was that the one person he longed to give his blood to was so reluctant to take it when any other vampire would have given their right arm for just a taste. Why did Zero think it was something so hard for him to bear when it truly wasn't? It wasn't! But now wasn't the right time to say that and Kaname kept silent, content to just hold the hunter close. Minutes ticked past quietly and Zero finally raised his head.

"Sorry. Are you all right?" he whispered. Kaname nodded and Zero's eyes drifted to his exposed neck and then back to his face somewhat hesitantly, the intoxicating scent of Kaname's blood still lingering in the air.

"I mean just now... when I pulled away," he murmured, a faint blush colouring his cheeks. Relief flooded Kaname's aching heart at those words - how like Zero they were. Honest. Caring. And wonderful beyond belief.

"I'm fine, Zero," he replied with a calm he barely felt. "Look," he tilted his neck a little. "Already healed."

He fished his handkerchief out from his trouser pocket as he spoke, intending to wipe his neck clean. He was conscious of a twinge of regret - Zero had always licked his wounds closed but this time, he hadn't. Zero's amethyst eyes were still tinged with crimson and they followed the pureblood's hand involuntarily. He had left a few crimson smears on the pale creamy skin and on impulse, he leaned forward. Kaname's eyes widened at the unexpected movement and widened a little more as familiar twin stings bloomed in his neck again, sending a shiver all the way down to his toes.

__

Zero... was still hungry?

But the hunter only drew a token mouthful of blood before he slid his fangs free again. The slow and careful way he did it was evident of his regret at his earlier roughness and Kaname shuddered beautifully under the erotic sensation. He only realised why Zero had bitten him again when a warm wet tongue came into play - tthe hunter was licking his wounds closed after all. Kaname's eyes fluttered closed as he trembled under the gentle ministrations on his sensitised flesh for as long as it lasted. When the warm and careful mouth left his neck at last, Kaname couldn't stop the small sound of protest from escaping his lips.

"No – don't, Zero. I – please-" The words spilled out before he could stop himself.

"Don't what?" Zero frowned, absently licking at his lips and making Kaname shiver at the sight.

"Don't... don't go," he whispered. Zero's eyebrows raised in surprise.

"I'm right here," he pointed out quietly. He didn't know why but the vulnerable, almost lost look in Kaname's eyes was tugging at his heart again.

__

But he's always been like this after each time you bite him. Don't you remember?

From out of nowhere, that voice whispered a reminder and Zero's frown deepened. Had it always been like this for Kaname? Had he always looked this vulnerable after being fed on? But Zero had drunk from him for years... and it had never been this noticeable. Or had he simply not noticed? Or chosen not to notice?

Kaname moistened his lips nervously, feeling self conscious under that intense and unblinking amethyst gaze. Zero couldn't stop staring at him - he was mesmerised all of a sudden by how beautifully shaped Kaname's lips were as the pureblood licked delicately at them with a tapering pink tongue. Looking as if he was waking up from a dream, Zero blinked rapidly and gave his head a hard shake.

__

I'm crazy. It must be due to taking in his blood. Vampire hormones or something like that...

"I mean," Kaname whispered. "Don't leave me. Just hold me for a bit."

Kaname's arms were still around Zero, transmitting his soft trembles to the hunter. Could it be that Kaname was perhaps feeling cold after giving blood? The guilt in Zero's heart increased along with a certain sense of relief; it was something so easily explained and he was just getting paranoid over nothing. Kaname had to be feeling cold as a result of blood loss - simple and logical.

"All right," Zero murmured and stepped closer again, sliding his arms around Kaname's waist. It was a little awkward of course being who and what they were, but it didn't really _feel _wrong. Kaname's slender frame actually felt rather good in Zero's arms and he smelled just as good. All right, so Kaname always smelled good but right at this moment, he smelled... well, very good. Zero quickly shied away from his thoughts with a little mental jerk.

__

Whoa, strange thought - stop it, stop it!

"Are you OK?" Kaname whispered as he closed his eyes, leaned his chin on Zero's shoulder and savoured, really _savoured _the amazing feeling of having his arms full of the person he loved, of being able to hear and feel that person's heart beat next to his and enjoy the warmth of that strong body next to his. It was a moment before Zero answered.

"Yeah," he whispered back. A puzzled frown was still pulling his brows together; it felt strange to hug Kaname like this, for far longer than the usual perfunctory greeting or farewell hug they would give each other in the past but well, after not having someone to hug for a month, Zero realised he kind of liked it. At least, he did if he didn't think too much about what he was actually doing...

A rather awkward yet comfortable five minutes passed and Zero finally forced himself to stir. His legs were getting tired of staying in one position and now that reason was setting in, he was torn between increasing uneasiness at how strangely good hugging Kaname felt and surprised amusement at how strangely content the pureblood seemed to be.

"Hey, Kaname?" he asked quietly, wondering absently if the pureblood had fallen asleep; he was so still.

"Hmm...?"

The soft murmur was followed by a sleepy sounding yawn that drew Zero's eyebrows apart and up. Kaname shifted a little but didn't move away as Zero expected him to. Instead, he nuzzled even closer if that was possible. Despite Kaname being a fully grown male, it felt to Zero like he was hugging a much younger Isamu who was prone to bouts of clinginess in his younger days. A contented sigh escaped Kaname's lips; he was in seventh heaven. This was where he truly belonged, securely wrapped up in Zero's arms. He didn't want to go anywhere at all right now and probably wouldn't move away even if an earthquake occurred. Zero shook him a little, increasingly surprised that the regal pureblood wasn't pulling away.

__

Geez, give a pureblood an inch...

"Hey, you awake, Kaname?"

A small nod of the dark head resting on his shoulder answered his question and Zero felt a lock of silky hair caress his cheek, sending an unexpected tingle down his spine.

"Awake... and happier than I can remember," came the sleepy reply. Despite himself, a faint smile touched Zero's lips. It was kind of - well, sweet to know that Kaname was comforted by their embrace. Yuuki had truly brought them closer even though Zero bet she hadn't thought it would be anything this embarrassing. Or intimate. Thinking of her made his heart ache again so he quickly cast about in his mind for something else to say.

"You're gonna spoil me, you know," he remarked softly. "It's only been a month. Even in the past, I never used to need this much blood unless - unless I... you know, those times when I, uh, needed it."

A note of pained embarrassment had coloured his voice; Zero hated those incidents even though his pristine hunter records at the HA showed only successfully completed missions. His superiors had never found out about those times when he had somehow - until now, he still didn't know how he could have bungled up - underestimated the number of Es and hence gotten himself injured as a result, despite employing both vampire speed and skill. Zero had still completed the missions successfully so he never brought those incidents up with his superiors or anyone else especially Yuuki. He always made sure he was fully healed by the time he went back home. It was different with Kaname though. For one thing, Zero knew the pureblood wouldn't fret about him that much and for another... he already knew about those times being Zero's primary blood source and the first person the hunter contacted whenever they happened. Zero never even had to voice out what he needed; the pureblood seemed able to read his mind each time.

"Good thing the HA never found out," Zero added feelingly. He was thankful those attacks had only happened when he was working solo. It would never do to have his hunter colleagues blab about his apparent ineptitude or worse, witness his blood lust first hand. It had taken years to gain their trust and respect as it was...

Kaname nodded sleepily, feeling warm, safe and protected in Zero's strong arms.

"It's OK," he whispered. "I always made sure there were no witnesses around when those attacks happened."

Kaname was so contented with where he was right now that his brain didn't register the way Zero suddenly stiffened in his arms but he did blink his eyes open when the hunter abruptly pulled away. The puzzled frown knitting Zero's brows together caused a sudden and icy ball of dread to settle firmly in Kaname's stomach and brought him to full alertness in less than a second.

__

Oh God. Oh God, no - I didn't say that out loud, I didn't...

Kaname was suddenly trembling with a mixture of both guilt and dread, his heart pounding away in his chest and colour draining from his face. He didn't know if he could lie convincingly to Zero this time. Or ever.

"What are you talking about, Kaname? How on earth could you have made sure of such a thing?" Zero looked completely baffled.

Kaname swallowed hard, his wide eyes locked with perplexed amethyst ones. He had just committed the greatest slip of all and had no one to blame but himself. Zero was absolutely going to hate him for this.

-- Chapter End --


	7. Chapter 7: The Shock

**Author Notes:** Thank you everyone for your lovely reviews! Sorry for the long wait after that cliffie and I'm relieved I finally got this chapter coherent enough to post! It's a little short but it will have to do otherwise I'll never get around to posting it this week. Hope it's still enjoyable :)

-- Chapter Start --

"Kaname? How could you have made sure of such a thing?"

Kaname was silent. He had no idea what to say to stave off the impending disaster he knew was going to break over him. Besides, the guilt in his eyes was already too obvious.

"What did you mean about making sure there were no witnesses?" Zero persisted.

Kaname swallowed as his usually clever and resourceful mind spun around endlessly but kept coming up with blank. He knew his deer-caught-in-the-headlights look had pretty much given the game away but even if it hadn't, Zero couldn't have misread the guilty and miserable vibes emanating from him for anything else. In a matter of moments, realisation started to dawn in the hunter's amethyst eyes and Kaname watched it happen with a sort of fatalistic resignation. He was in big trouble and he knew it. A part of his mind rationalised that he should be relieved that there was now one less secret to keep. Another part scoffed at this idiocy and insisted that he shouldn't fear or even care what a mere Level D thought of him but Kaname knew better. Zero had never been that to him. Never. Not even when the hunter was his perceived love rival back in their Cross Academy days or when everyone thought his days numbered. If Kaname had thought that he never would have let his only sister get as close to Zero as she had.

"You knew. You knew about those attacks..." Zero whispered at last. Kaname gave a jerk of a nod, looking for all the world like a condemned man.

"You knew because you were behind them," Zero added in a voice that shook, that stated he couldn't even believe what he was saying. He was pale and looked rather like he was going to be sick. Kaname's eyes widened.

"No! No, Zero - I didn't organise any of them!" he protested. "They were real HA missions, I just - just uh... drew a few more Es... to the scene... that's all!"

Kaname snapped his mouth shut, horrified at how horrible it sounded when said out loud.

"You _arranged _for all those extra Es to attack me?" Zero demanded. His fangs were starting to lengthen in his outrage and he was trembling, his skin crawling with goose bumps of shock and betrayal.

_No wonder there were more Es than reported. The HA couldn't have made the same mistake so many times. All these years, I kept wondering why... all those Es that popped out of nowhere... they were because of you - __Kaname!_

Truly, the very last person on earth anyone would ever suspect.

"What the hell, Kaname - did you want me to die?" Zero exploded and the look of horror in his eyes stabbed Kaname right through his wildly pounding heart.

"No! You were never in danger of getting killed!" he protested earnestly. "Trust me! You were safe, Zero, I made sure of that!"

For the second time, Kaname froze. He had made another slip, one as big as the previous one. One that was just as unforgivable.

_Shit... I didn't say that one out loud, I didn't!_

"How could you have been sure of that?" Zero demanded, his brows knitting together. "You weren't there!"

Then his eyes widened.

_Oh my God. The only way Kaname could have made sure of that was if... if..._

"You _were _there. You were there all along," Zero whispered as he stared at the very uncomfortable looking pureblood. It was then that everything finally fell into place for Zero, every single little thing that had always niggled at him before, everything that he had puzzled over before shrugging it off as mere coincidences or pureblood super powers.

Why Kaname had insisted that he had ensured Zero's safety each time.

Why he could always be contacted despite his very busy schedule.

Why he always seemed to know the reason he was being contacted.

Why he could reach Zero in a matter of minutes.

Why the attacks only happened on his solo missions.

And finally... why no one from the HA had ever found out.

All the damning facts fell into place for Zero like a handful of seemingly random jigsaw puzzles assembled together at top speed by unseen hands. Kaname saw it clearly in the shocked eyes staring back at him. For an unforgivable second, he even thought about denying everything but he had already said too much and even that very brief hesitation was telling in itself. In the end, Kaname could only nod miserably.

"I hid my aura," he admitted softly. "I _had _to be there, Zero. I had to make sure you were not in any real danger."

Inwardly, Kaname crumbled. He had as good as stripped Zero's pride away from him and he knew how precious that hunter pride was. How could he even think of begging Zero's forgiveness now? Kaname had employed subterfuge, pure and simple. He was good at it, it was inevitable in his business dealings but he had hated having to use it against Zero. In the end though, Kaname had hated the alternative even more - the weeks and months of waiting for Zero to need him. The periods in between the feedings that grew longer and longer over the years as the hunter's condition stabilised and strengthened. It was easy enough for Kaname to turn a blind eye to his less than examplary actions when snugly nestled in Zero's strong arms, when he could pretend he was both important and needed. It wasn't quite as easy to deal with the guilt once Zero left but Kaname always managed by promising himself never to interfere with the hunter's missions again. Only of course he did. Time and time again.

Now that he had confessed though, Kaname felt a strong compulsion to come clean tugging at his heart. He didn't want this to be between them anymore. He felt as if he was obeying a call that went unseen and unheard... as if Zero was his master. And like a slave who had no other choice, Kaname simply stood there and waited for his master's wrath to break over him like a tidal wave. But when minutes ticked by slowly and Zero still looked like he had turned to stone, Kaname finally broke the silence.

"Not all of them, Zero," he said, too miserable to try to sound persuasive. "I didn't interfere with all of your misssions, believe me. Just - just only..."

The words trailed away when Zero continued to stare at him with those stunned, betrayed eyes.

"So how many missions, Kaname?" he whispered at last. "Just how many missions _did _you interfere with?"

Kaname swallowed past a raw aching throat and looked away.

_Guilty. So very completely, irrevocably and unredeemably guilty._

"A few," he admitted reluctantly. Zero knew an evasive answer when he heard one - he had raised three children after all. He straightened his shoulders, folded his arms across his chest and narrowed his eyes. When he next spoke, all shock had disappeared from his voice; it had now taken on a clear steely quality his three children were not unfamiliar with. Zero very rarely took that tone of voice with them which was why it had never failed him in the past. In fact, hearing it directed at himself for the first time almost made Kaname wince.

"How. Many. _Times_, Kaname."

The pureblood's beseeching gaze faltered and dropped. It was utterly ridiculous. Completely unheard of. He should never have to back down from anyone. He was a _pureblood _- he didn't have to take this from anyone, not even a fellow pureblood! In fact, he should _obliterate _anyone who even tried... but this - this person, this man who stood before him now with his muscular arms folded immovably across his chest and that fierce glare shining in his eyes, this unique hybrid of hunter and vampire, of two opposing species perfectly melded into one being, nurtured and strengthened by his own pure blood for decades... Zero Kiryuu was truly the one man in this world that Kaname Kuran could not challenge even if he had wanted to.

His heart simply would not not allow it.

In the end, Kaname drew a trembling breath and looked back up, braving that stern and icy look with more determination than he had thought he would need. At this moment, it truly would have been easier to face a horde of rampaging Level Es. Ds. Cs or Bs. Hell, even those of his own stature.

"Eighteen times altogether," he finally confessed. He had kept track of this secret as the years went by and the number steadily increased. Having to finally disclose his actions made Kaname's cheeks burn with shame. Quickly, he dropped his head to allow his long wavy hair hide his blush.

"Eighteen times!" The words exploded from an incredulous Zero and Kaname flinched.

- o -

"But - but why would you _do _such a thing?"

Kaname's initial fear that Zero would simple bolt from his room - probably after decking him a good number of times - had been unfounded after all. True, the shocked hunter looked as if he had just been stabbed for the second time in the back by a most trusted ally but ten minutes later, he was still in the same room with Kaname. Zero had spent the first minute or so opening and closing his mouth as though he wanted to say something but wasn't quite decided what it should be. He then shook his head and spent the remainder of the time wearing a path in the luxuriant carpet beneath his feet as he paced up and down, ran both hands through his hair repeatedly and generally looked like he had just been given irrefutable proof that the earth was flat after all... but he was still here. So far.

Zero was utterly and completely bewildered, something that was actually in Kaname's favour since it served to cushion the betrayed anger the hunter felt. Their heated rivalry so many years ago had long since given way to genuine trust and affection and the feeling was mutual - Zero would have bet his life on it. Kaname had never failed to treat him with respect and grace ever since the first time he had fed him. It was completely astounding that the regal and gracious pureblood would actually stoop so low to do such a reprehensible act that didn't make any sort of sense. After all, Zero was married to his only sister and he knew Kaname would do anything for Yuuki. Anything! Even bare his precious pureblood neck to keep his brother-in-law alive, sane and strong.

So why...? _Why?_

To think that Kaname had secretly endangered his life! Deliberately! And not only once... or twice... but eighteen. Almost twenty separate times over the course of twenty over years! Astounding. _Unbelievable_. Zero's pacing stopped abruptly. He swung around and fixed Kaname with that same angry, hurt and betrayed glare, one that cut the pureblood's heart up inside.

"How could you _do _such a thing, Kaname? What gave the right to interfere in those missions? Did you want me to die, is that it?"

Of course Zero didn't honestly think that Kaname actually wanted him dead since it would devastate Yuuki but he just couldn't think of any logical reason to explain the pureblood's strange actions. Kaname felt each one of Zero's accusing words slam into his pounding heart with all the force and accuracy of Bloody Rose being fired at him from close range. Outwardly, he looked composed if a little pale and shaken but inside... oh inside, he was a mess of guilt and hurt.

"No, Zero! No, I never wanted that!" Kaname protested immediately, his slightly breathless voice utterly sincere. Didn't Zero know that he would rather kill himself than do that? No, of course he wouldn't... but this so wasn't the right time for a confession of love. It would be taken in the worst possible light.

"Zero, look - you were never in any real danger. Trust me on this," Kaname added as calmly as he could. "I made sure of that. It's just that you have no idea..."

He closed his eyes, his slender body giving a small but telling shudder. His usual eloquence had deserted him again but it was time to confess. Not _everything _but Zero deserved to know the truth about some of it. It would likely freak him out no end but it might also make future feeding situations a little more bearable for Kaname. For one thing, he wouldn't have to hide how he felt each time Zero bit him... that is, if the hunter could still bring himself to do so after knowing the truth. It was a frightening thought. With another shiver, Kaname pushed it away just as he pushed away the panic trying to claw at him. He would _not _go to pieces now. He would not.

"Let me explain," he said quietly. Zero shook his head, his lips pressed into a thin line of disgust or anger - Kaname couldn't quite tell. Possibly both.

"Please, Zero - I want you to know why," Kaname persisted, hating the quiver in his voice. It was weak and he couldn't afford to be weak now. He had to stay calm. Commanding. In control of the situation even though it was slipping away from him and he felt like he was dying inside.

"No!" Zero shouted. "I don't want to know why you tried to have me killed!"

"I never said that!" Kaname shot back, his voice rising despite his resolve. He was desperate to be believed. "That wasn't the reason why I got those extra Es!"

Zero fisted his hands tightly. He was shaking. Nothing made sense - nothing! To think he had respected Kaname all these years, thinking him different from the usual arrogant pureblood, thinking how damned lucky he was to have such a generous benefactor as family. To think that he had followed Kaname on this trip because he had thought the pureblood lonely - hah! It certainly looked like Kaname had way too much time on his hands.

"So you did it just for kicks then?" Zero asked flatly. Kaname's eyes widened even more. What - just for kicks?

"No, Zero, no... why would I do that?" he replied despairingly. Oh God - Zero hated him, he knew it... he could live with Zero's anger or scorn but not hatred. Please, not hatred. Kaname had wealth, power, assets and access to everything in life but it all meant nothing to him if he didn't have Zero's regard and respect.

"And what about Yuuki?" Zero continued, his voice still shaking. "Did you even think about her at all? How she would have felt if she'd known?"

Zero couldn't believe it - Kaname had to have known how it would tear his sister apart if she had found out what her beloved brother had done to her husband. Kaname closed his eyes and gave a small nod, a barely audible sob escaping his lips.

"I did," he whispered. "I did think about her, Zero. I thought about her all the time. But you just have no idea, Zero. What it was like..."

What what was like? Despite the hot waves of anger beating away at him, Zero's mind caught onto the fact that Kaname had said those last few words a couple of times now. It aroused his curiousity since Kaname always seemed so in control of himself. Besides, none of this made sense - if Kaname hadn't wanted to kill him, then why would he go to all that trouble? And where did he get those Es anyway? Surely he hadn't... created them... Everything in Zero rebelled against that revolting thought. No. Surely not... and yet...

_All right. Get a grip, Kiryuu. You're no longer that seventeen year old boy. You know Kaname better now and you know his views._

Zero took a deep breath and exhaled, placing his hands on his hips. He decided that Kaname at least deserved the chance to explain his actions. He owed the pureblood this much, having drunk his blood for so many years now. Besides, he just couldn't turn away from that haunted look in Kaname's dark eyes, the look that suggested he had suffered through his own actions.

"All right," Zero finally said. "I'm listening, Kaname. So tell me."

Sudden and knee weakening relief swept throught Kaname but he still hesitated. Zero said he was prepared to listen but the angry expression on his face said it would be very hard to convince him. Still, nothing quite like the truth to set one free... or to seal one's doom, Kaname thought resignedly.

"Zero... I know that what I did was inexcusable. But it really was very hard not to - to interfere," he began quietly, willing his voice not to shake. He didn't quite succeed.

"Why?" Zero asked shortly, his eyes demanding nothing but the honest unvarnished truth from his brother-in-law. Kaname inhaled deeply and fisted his hands tightly by his sides, praying that he could still salvage the situation. He felt like his very sanity depended on it.

"Why? Because I crave your bite," he confessed simply.

_I have craved it from the first time you claimed me with your fangs._

-- Chapter End --


	8. Chapter 8: The Explanation

**Author Notes: **Hello again! This is the rest of the chapter that I didn't manage to get ready last week. I'm suitably chastened after inflicting two cliffhangers in a row on you all so I promise that this chapter doesn't have one. Enjoy... and thank you all again for your wonderful reviews! _-bows-_

- Chapter Start -

"W-what?" Zero whispered, thinking he had heard wrongly. Very wrongly. Of all the possible reasons he had expected Kaname to come up with, this one... well, this one wasn't even in the list!

"I... crave your bite," Kaname repeated bravely but with rapidly eroding confidence. It was obvious from Zero's expression that the hunter didn't believe him one bit. Kaname felt his cheeks flush at having to state a simple fact that was common knowledge to apparently every other vampire except the one standing before him now. Vampires were affected by another's bite, pure and simple. It didn't matter whether that bite was gentle or rough, consensual or forced, whether it was given by a lover or an enemy, done in anger or out of love, to strip pride or offer comfort, to bring humiliation or provide sustenance, whether out of friendship or due to hatred. In short, it was impossible for a vampire to be bitten particularly, on the neck, and remain completely unmoved.

"You're crazy," Zero stated with conviction. His eyes gave away the fact that he thought the pureblood was lying.

_Really, is this the best Kaname could come up with? Puh-leez!_

Kaname just shook his head silently, his eyes wide and sincere.

"You're crazy if you think I'm going to fall for that," Zero repeated, having decided to be frank. His pride was still smarting. He had expected Kaname to come up with a much, much better reason that this! Did Kaname honestly expect him to believe that he had upped the difficulty level of his missions so many times just for this - this nonsensical craving? The whole thing made even less sense than before!

"I'm telling you the truth," Kaname insisted. "No matter how or why you bite me, I want it. Ever since the first time you bit me, I have wanted it more and more. Why won't you believe me? It's the truth!"

The pureblood's soft voice had taken on a rare sulky edge that went against Zero's paternal vibes. He glared sternly at Kaname.

"Are you telling me you found out about those missions and interfered with them just to get me to drink from you?"

"Yes!" Kaname insisted and glared right back. Honestly, was his beloved hunter dense or what? What would it take for him to believe?

Zero almost growled at what he thought was a blatant and disrespectful lie. Honestly, did the pureblood think he was a child? He was a father who had three of his own, damnit!

"You surely can't expect me to believe that crap, Kaname!" he shouted, exasperated beyond belief. "Just tell me the truth!"

And Kaname finally snapped.

"I am! I did all that because I craved your bite, Zero! I wanted you to go on biting me and you did it less and less with each passing year! I hated that!"

It was a good thing all the hotel rooms were sound proofed because Kaname was also shouting, his disturbed aura making several things in the room rattle. Zero opened his mouth to retort but nothing came out except for a strangled sound. Kaname ignored it and ranted on. He had come to the end of his tether and since he had started confessing, he might as well make a good job of it.

"I long for your fangs, OK? OK? God help me, I wanted you to bite me all the time! I still do!"

Zero's mouth fell open. Kaname shuddered after that rather immature outburst, trembling arms going around himself as if he feared he might explode if he didn't physically hold himself together. He was baring a secret he had held close to his heart for so many years to someone who would in all likelihood hate him for divulging it. Still, it was too late to turn back. The words had been said and they couldn't be taken back. Zero closed his mouth after a few moments but continued to stare at Kaname, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed. He was embarrassed at Kaname's words and he was torn between shock, consternation and even horror at what the words meant. The whole thing went against everything he had believed in. How could anyone actually like being bitten by a vampire? And to think that that someone was no mere vampire but Kaname Kuran. A _pureblood_.

It was amazing. No. It was mind boggling. Too mind boggling to be true.

Zero inhaled sharply. From all the emotions swirling inside of him, he picked anger, letting it rise to the fore and swamp the others before he actually started believing in this crap. This was Kaname Kuran he was dealing with, for Pete's sake. Kaname was a pureblood. Purebloods were masters of deception; why should his brother-in-law be any different? Zero pushed aside the strange unwanted guilt gnawing at him. So what if Kaname had never been the typical arrogant pureblood who thought all lower class vampires beneath him? It had to be a lie! And even if it was true - and it wasn't - Zero shouldn't feel guilty about this. It was never his intention to make anyone crave his bite, never! Heck, he hadn't even known about it up until a minute ago! All right, so if this was true then perhaps Kaname was just suffering from some sort of strange vampire addiction towards bites...

Well, tough. It wasn't his problem.

"Yeah well, get someone else to bite you when I don't need to!" Zero snapped back. "Surely I'm not the only one holding that privilege!"

Kaname's eyes widened and filled with distress and pain. He looked as if Zero had punched him in the gut. Kaname knew he should be furious at this allegation... but the only thing he felt now was an overwhelming hurt that eclipsed every other emotion. Did Zero really think he went around offering his neck to everyone he met?

Zero exhaled and shook his head in self disgust. He had crossed the line and he knew it. He knew it even without the warning bells clanging loudly inside his head. A pureblood's blood was sacred. Taking even a drop of that precious elixir by force was a crime punishable by death. Implying that purebloods gave their life nectar freely to anyone other than their chosen mate was a grave insult and in many purebloods' opinion, only a slightly lesser crime than the previous one.

"I'm sorry," Zero apologised steadily. His amethyst eyes showed genuine remorse and his earlier anger was now swamped by regret. "I shouldn't have said that."

The Kuran bloodline was one of the purest - pure blood in its most undiluted form. Being offered that powerful and precious liquid even once was a great honour in itself but Kaname had given his freely to Zero for so many years without any obligation whatsoever. Zero knew that what he had said was both unwarranted and unfair. He was no longer a stranger to Kaname's generosity and graciousness but the pureblood once again managed to surprise him when he only shook his head instead of tearing him apart.

"You are the only one to have ever bitten me, Zero," Kaname insisted huskily. The words sent a thrill of wonder, awe and uneasiness tingling down Zero's spine, making him shift uncomfortably on his feet. It was so much easier to deal with a genially smiling Kaname Kuran who brought his family expensive treats than an earnest one who looked like Zero alone had the power to detemine his destiny.

"Perhaps it's because of that but I..." Kaname paused to run his tongue over his dry lips, catching Zero's unwilling attention. "You were getting stronger and stronger each year. My blood had not only stopped your descent to Level E, it had also stablised you to the point where you needed less."

It was something they already knew from the start since Zero's condition at that time had only just begun to deteriorate. Kaname just hadn't anticipated his growing dependence on Zero's bite. He couldn't help musing how ironic it was that anyone else would have wanted more and more of his blood regardless of how powerful they got but not this annoyingly stubborn, innately honest and immensely wonderful individual standing before him now.

"I didn't think of the repercussions that your bite would cause me," Kaname admitted hesitantly. He wasn't used to stating his feelings like this... he wasn't used to sharing his uncertainties with anyone. But if he had to, then there was no doubt in his mind that he was talking to the most suitable candidate there was. "I didn't expect to become dependent on it at first. I only realised it when your feeding schedule went from once every two months to once every three. At your request."

Goose bumps prickled on Zero's skin and he resisted the urge to shiver in response. He knew purebloods had a much greater mental capacity than others but to be able to recall what he considered a trivial detail... Kaname saw Zero's reaction but pressed on doggedly, ignoring the dull ache of remembrance in his chest.

"Later on, the schedule changed again from every three months to four. That meant only three times a year. Again Zero, at your request."

Zero bit his lip before nodding. Yes, he vaguely recalled saying something to that effect in the Chairman's study one rainy night after licking the wounds he had made in Kaname's pale neck closed. The pureblood had looked dismayed but in the dim lighting, Zero thought he was only imagining it. After all, why would anyone be dismayed at having a reprieve?

"Kaname, I only wanted to-"

"And then, you said you only needed my blood twice a year... and a couple of years after that, only once... just to maintain your condition as it was."

Kaname continued as if he hadn't heard Zero. He tried hard to keep his voice steady but it shook. He could remember Zero's words as if they were spoken just yesterday. He could remember the decided tone in the hunter's voice as if Zero was completely unmoved at the prospect of taking less of Kaname's blood.

_Only once a year, Zero. Dear God, how did you expect me to survive on that?_

Zero shook his head slowly. Guilt and unease were swirling inside his stomach even though he didn't know why he should feel this way.

"I didn't know. Kaname, I swear I didn't! I just didn't want you to think that each time you visited us, you had to let me bite you. I thought you'd be pleased!"

"Pleased? Well, I wasn't."

Kaname's expression turned mutinous, supple lips shaping into an almost pout. At any other time, Zero would have thought it funny and perhaps even teased the pureblood about how a pout didn't sit well on such regal features but the last thing he felt like now was teasing. Or smiling.

"Zero," Kaname's eyes begged Zero to believe what he was saying. "I never felt that I was forced to let you bite me. I... I missed our feedings."

There was a shy yet yearning tone in Kaname's soft voice that made butterflies of panic flutter in Zero's stomach. Again, he shifted uneasily, amethyst eyes darting around the room.

"Uhm... but-"

"I wanted you to bite me each time I came back to Cross Academy. In fact, I expected you to and each time you said you didn't need my blood, I felt... hurt."

Such a pathetically mild word that couldn't even begin to explain the crushing waves of disappointment, pain and inadequacy that flooded Kaname's heart at Zero's refusal. It was such an intimate thing to confess and Kaname flushed beautifully but when he saw the the panic and chagrin in Zero's amethyst eyes, he quickly ducked his head. God, the hunter must think him such a pathetic addict!

Zero swallowed. The sight of Kaname standing before him with head penitently bowed and silk shirt unbuttoned made him think that the pureblood was perhaps awaiting punishment of some sort from him. Ridiculous. For all the betrayed anger that had swamped him eariler, Zero had never felt less like punishing Kaname right now.

"I honestly didn't know," Zero said earnestly. "I swear I didn't, Kaname. It was hard enough for me to say no to your offer but I thought-"

Kaname's head came up abruptly, eyes wide and lips parted in shock.

"What did you say?" he whispered. Caught by surprise, Zero mentally backpedalled.

"Uh, I mean I shouldn't take advantage of-"

"No! Repeat what you said just now. Please, Zero," Kaname half demanded, half implored. His heart was beating fast in his chest but he suppressed the hope, not wanting to be crushed for the umpteenth time. Zero looked embarrassed again as his gaze skittered away from Kaname. Finally, he sighed and turned back to the anxiously waiting pureblood.

"Oh, for the love of...! Look Kaname, it wasn't because I didn't want your blood anymore, all right? Geez, I thought you knew that! I mean, how could anyone resist?" Zero sounded exasperated as hell which he was at that moment. Did Kaname seriously think he didn't want that delicious, precious and intoxicating elixir anymore? He would never tire of it! Never!

"I just thought-" Zero broke off and exhaled when he realised he was starting to sound like a broken record. Kaname didn't care. He just shook his head and closed his suddenly smarting eyes on a prayer of utter thankfulness. Thank God Zero still wanted his blood. Thank God he had that at least. It was all right. He was still useful. He was needed.

"Uhm, Kaname?" Zero's worried voice made the pureblood open his eyes again.

"I know what you thought, Zero," he spoke quietly. "You thought I was submitting to you whenever you bit me, that it was something I had to bear because of the promise I made you and Yuuki. But you're mistaken. I have never felt that way."

The same yearning was back in those dark eyes again. Zero couldn't help wondering if Kaname had something else he wanted to say that he was deliberately holding back.

"So all this... was why you interfered in my missions then?" Zero asked, already knowing the answer but wanting a confirmation nonetheless. It astounded him that Kaname Kuran, the perfect pureblood business tycoon who seemed to want for nothing, had done all this just because he wanted Zero to bite him. Kaname simply nodded.

"It was the only reason, I swear," he admitted, sounding almost shy. "I admit I wanted to get you injured but only just enough to need my blood to heal. I swear to you, Zero... your life was never in any serious danger."

It was hard enough for Kaname to watch and wait for those E talons to tear into his beloved hunter's flesh before he could intervene from where he was hiding. It would have been too suspicious to have those Es self-disintegrate so Kaname used his powers to only slow down their responses, letting Zero kill them on his own. Besides, Kaname found it thrilling to watch the hunter's speed and grace in action. If the pureblood felt any additional guilt about causing the eventual death of those Es later on, he still felt it a small price to pay for the sweet ecstasy of having Zero feed hungrily from his neck afterwards.

For the next few moments, Zero could only stare at Kaname. It seemed a small eternity before he nodded slowly, digesting what Kaname had said. The pureblood gave a slight deprecating shrug.

"I hoped so much that you would never find out, that you would never know what I had done. But now that you have..." Kaname paused to swallow hard. "Please, Zero. Don't hate me for it," he added in a barely audible tone. Again, goose bumps prickled on Zero's skin and he had to resist the strange desire to soothe away the stark pain in those dark eyes.

"But Kaname, why didn't you ever tell me? You never said a word!" he burst out, exasperation and guilt creeping into his voice despite himself. Kaname shook his head, a sad smile hovering on his lips.

"What was I to tell you?" he asked softly. "That your wife's elder brother, a successful pureblood who seemed to have everything he wanted, was secretly addicted to your bite? It would have freaked you out."

Zero couldn't deny that - it _would _have freaked him out. What Kaname said made complete sense now but when Zero thought about how the pureblood had kept this secret inside him for years, driven to underhand tactics out of sheer desperation, he honestly didn't know what to think.

"It was wrong of me. Do you think I don't know that, Zero?" Kaname asked sadly, his gaze haunted. "But the truth is that I love the feel of your fangs in my flesh. I crave it."

_I also crave the feel of your arms around me... but now isn't the time to tell you that._

With a soft hopeless sounding sigh, Kaname turned around. He blinked hard, trying hard not to give into the shameful moisture pricking at the backs of his eyes. Behind him, Zero felt again that same pang in his heart. Damnit, why did the pureblood keep inciting these strange feelings of - of _compassion _in him? Kaname had intentionally caused him to be hurt during those missions, for God's sake! But it was no use. Zero just couldn't stay angry at at the pureblood right now.

After a few moments of awkward silence, Kaname finally turned his head. Without realising it, Zero found himself studying that familiar perfect profile, pale creamy skin contrasting against the solid dark blue of the satin drapes that covered the windows. He had known this gentle, generous person for years now. But honestly, how much did he know about Kaname Kuran... not the face he presented to the world but the person he was inside?

Not much, actually.

At that moment, Kaname turned to face him completely and Zero was once again struck by how beautiful the pureblood was... and how vulnerable he looked right now.

"Zero?" Kaname's voice was still subdued. "I hope that you will continue to take my blood, regardless of whether you need to or not. With no strings attached."

He felt that it was too much to ask for Zero's forgiveness right now but he would be content if Zero still considered his blood worthwhile. The hunter's lips twisted in a wry smile. Was there another Level D around with such a generous benefactor? Zero didn't think so and he nodded. It had never occured to him to refuse in any case. Warm gratitude shone in Kaname's eyes and the shadow of a hopeful smile hovered on his lips. It was at this moment that Zero suddenly realised how exhausted the pureblood looked. Confessing his actions in the past had to be a big burden off his shoulders but far from looking relieved, Kaname looked tired and none too steady on his feet.

"It's late. You should get some rest, Kaname," Zero's voice retained a hint of fatherly strictness and brooked no refusal. He still had a million questions to ask the pureblood but decided that they could wait. Besides, didn't Kaname have his meetings to go to? This was a business trip after all. Kaname nodded without bothering to argue. He was grateful to get a reprieve. He hadn't slept much in the past few days what with anticipating Zero's company on this trip and numbing fatigue had caught up with him at last.

"Get some sleep. I'm going to turn in too," Zero added. At the door, he paused again before looking over his shoulder. "I'll see you later, OK?"

Kaname knew from his tone that Zero hadn't quite let him off the hook but he didn't care. His traitorous heart that had leapt at those words and was now beating rapidly and hopefully inside his chest. Zero wanted to see him again... Zero didn't hate him... it was amazingly, _wonderfully _all right. Kaname felt weak kneed and almost light headed from the sheer relief sweeping through him.

"I have my meetings tonight but I will call your room when I return," he replied. "If... I may?" he added almost shyly. Hope leapt bright and hot in his eyes when Zero gave a small smile and nod.

"Make sure you do that," he agreed. Kaname happily memorised the beautiful sight of Zero's unexpected smile. This smile was _special_. This smile was for him. Kaname felt his heart fill with a sweet longing that was starting to feel as familiar and dear to him as Zero's scent and he smiled back.

"Sleep well, Zero," he said softly.

_I love you._

- Chapter End -


	9. Chapter 9: The Details

**Author Notes: **Thank you again for all your reviews! :D I'm so relieved I managed to get this out as two weeks of school holidays start here (that means even less free time for me). Enjoy this chapter!

- Chapter Start -

After Zero entered his room and closed the door, he leaned back against it and shut his eyes. Then he filled his lungs full of air and released it all in one long, gusty sigh. Slowly, he opened his eyes and looked around the beautifully appointed furnishings without seeing any of it. All he could see in his mind's eye was Kaname. Heck, all he could think of right now Kaname. Zero felt like he was one really, really confused hunter... and it was solely the fault of the earnest and beautiful pureblood next door who had pulled the rug completely out from under his feet.

_Beautiful? Crap!_

Zero blinked before shaking his head hard. What the _hell _was wrong with him now? He had never thought Kaname beautiful before! All right, so he had but only for the first few seconds he laid eyes on Kaname each time he came to visit; the pureblood's features were physically perfect after all. Perhaps Zero was just unused to spending this much time alone in his company. Or... it could very well be because of what Kaname had said. No. It _was _due to what he had said. Zero shook his head for what had to be the thousandth time in the past hour or so. Who would've ever thought...? And when had the Kaname he had known from before - that charismatic and supremely confident pureblood - changed into this trembling and vulnerable creature who had felt so unexpectedly good in his arms? Zero groaned and ran unsteady fingers through his much ruffled silver hair. He didn't know what to think!

Truly, Kaname had stunned him speechless, scared him spitless and boosted his modest ego sky high all at the same time.

Despite being alone, Zero's cheeks warmed at that last thought. Now, just who was the one spouting nonsense here? He took a fortifying breath and made his way to the attached bathroom, resolved not to think anymore about Kaname. He was going to brush his teeth, change into his pyjamas and then he was going to hit the sack. End of story.

- o -

_A few hours later..._

When Kaname returned to his hotel room after the meetings, he didn't bother to switch on any of the lights. He had slept reasonably well earlier considering the emotional upheaval he had gone through but he was still tired. After grilling the persons responsible for the problems his subsidiary had run into and making contingency plans, he was mentally exhausted as well. Emotionally though, he felt numb. Perhaps it was because he had kept secret his feelings for Zero for so long or perhaps it was because the hunter hadn't actually fainted from shock but the eventual outcome (and the lack of physical violence accompanying it) had felt a bit of an anti-climax to Kaname. It was possible that the actual realisation that Zero now knew of his craving and hadn't gone stark raving mad would sink in a little later.

For now, it was three in the morning and Kaname was done with the business part of his trip. He and Zero were only due to fly back the next day so that meant he had a good many hours of free time to spend with the hunter. Despite his exhaustion, Kaname's lips tilted in a small smile and his eyes sparkled with anticipation. He didn't have to share Zero with anyone anymore, even if that person was his own beloved sister. Kaname still missed Yuuki very much - even thinking of her caused a pang in his heart - and he missed Yuko and the boys too but it was absolutely lovely to know that he was alone with Zero on this trip, something he had never experienced before.

As Kaname shrugged out of his jacket, he wondered absently if perhaps this time he would finally discover something about Zero that he didn't like but he found that a very unlikely possibility. The only thing he found annoying about the hunter so far was the latter's reluctance to drink his blood.

And speaking of Zero...

Despite knowing that he shouldn't, Kaname found himself standing at their adjoining doors in an instant, one hand already on the doorknob. He had unlocked his side as soon as Zero went back to his room earlier but he wasn't sure if the other end was unlocked. If Zero truly were his bodyguard, both doors would remain unlocked at all times but they had never discussed this aspect and Zero wasn't here to guard him. But he _was _just next door... and that was temptation itself. Kaname knew that what he was about to do was an invasion of privacy and yet he couldn't help himself. Just a peep, he told himself. Then he would take a shower before calling Zero's room extension.

- o -

When the telephone on the bedside table rang, Zero was already awake. He had awakened with a start a minute or so earlier, his hunter and vampire instincts working in sync to tell him that someone was in his room. When he opened his eyes though, he was alone. There was just the faintest click of a door to know that his instincts had been right but Zero knew his life wasn't in danger and told his galloping heart to calm down. He decided to remain in bed for a while longer, stretching lazily and enjoying the feel of the fine linen sheets sliding against his bare arms and legs. Zero let the phone ring a couple more times before reaching over to pick it up, already knowing who it was and wondering why Kaname didn't just remain in the room if he wanted to say something. The pureblood could be so darned formal sometimes.

"Yeah, I'm awake. You back already?" Zero said by way of a greeting even though it was rhetorical. Then he glanced at his watch. "Breakfast? Uhm... where? The in-house restaurant?"

At Kaname's reply, Zero's eyebrows went up. "I thought you didn't like room service," he replied bluntly.

"I don't," Kaname replied candidly. "But I thought you wanted to continue our conversation earlier."

It was a very taboo and intimate topic that neither of them wanted anyone else to overhear. And speaking of intimate... Despite his calm tone, Kaname's stomach started to fill with butterflies. Zero now knew that his bite was most welcome but he still hadn't a clue as to exactly _how _it affected his benefactor. Kaname couldn't help wondering if he would finally get the punch he had expected earlier once the hunter learned of this most interesting fact.

"OK. Give me five minutes to hit the shower and I'll be right over," Zero replied decisively. Kaname released a breath he wasn't aware he was holding.

"Use our adjoining doors," he offered.

"All right, see you soon," Zero replied and hung up. Kaname hung up as well and cautiously relaxed since there was nothing in Zero's voice to indicate he knew the pureblood had been in his room earlier. Kaname closed his eyes, remembering how beautiful the hunter had looked when he was asleep. Zero was dressed in a short sleeved T-shirt and boxers with the covers tangled about his legs and Kaname had longed to slip into bed and snuggle up to the hunter. He stood by the bed for a couple of minutes with his aura muted but when Zero stirred, Kaname had to move quickly to avoid being caught.

Six minutes later, there was a quiet knock on the adjoining door and Kaname glanced up instinctively from the newspaper, his heart suddenly tripping over itself.

"Come in," he invited. When Zero opened the door, his expression turned chagrined. Crap - Kaname was dressed as casually as he was, barefoot and clad in one of his black silk robes, belted at the waist. Zero was wearing one of the hotel's white terrycloth bathrobes. He shrugged and ran a hand rather self consciously through his freshly washed hair. He never bothered to comb it since the fine strands usually fell where they liked once dry but he now wondered if his hair looked messy. Then he realised he wasn't supposed to care how he looked and forced his hand down. The pureblood was seated in one of the two cushioned armchairs placed next to a small table at the far corner of the room, already laid out with fine china and linen.

"Our breakfast is already here."

Kaname gestured gracefully to the trolley placed next to him but his eyes were on Zero. The hunter's cheeks were still a little flushed from his hot shower and his silver hair was damp and sticking up here and there as if it had just been roughly toweled dry. In short, he looked absolutely _wonderful_. Zero walked over and sat down in the other armchair with his gaze carefully averted from Kaname because their robes made them look as if they had just gotten out of the shower. The same shower. At the same time. Instead, Zero leaned nearer to the trolley and pretended he was interested in the food. There were a few covered dishes on the top shelf and the aroma of the freshly brewed coffee in the coffeepot on the second shelf was enough to make his stomach rumble appreciatively.

"Help yourself, Zero," Kaname invited. He crossed his long legs with his usual elegance, a movement that Zero caught out of the corner of his eye. He was glad his gaze was still on the laden trolley. Quickly, he busied himself by taking off the domed covers. "Mmm, smells good," he commented casually and a small smile appeared on Kaname's lips.

"I'm glad you think so," he responded, leaning forward to reach for the silver coffeepot. When Zero quickly jerked back, Kaname's heart sank and his gaze fell. He told himself it was only to be expected after shocking the hunter with his involvement in those missions. The pureblood was too busy chastising himself to notice that Zero was biting his lip in chagrin. The hunter hadn't meant to be that obvious but it was hard not to sit so close to Kaname and not think about what he had said... how the pureblood longed for his bite all the time. Zero still didn't know what to say to that and in the slightly awkward silence that followed, Kaname poured coffee for him. It was something he did whenever he had dinner at Cross Academy regardless of the hunter's embarrassed protests. Zero knew very well what the rest of the vampire community would think about a pureblood serving someone not of his class and younger than him but Kaname always ignored his protests and Zero finally gave up after Yuuki gently reminded him that Kaname probably appreciated the chance to serve someone else for a change.

When Kaname handed the cup to Zero, he expected the latter to start firing questions at him immediately but Zero only accepted the coffee with a nod, his amethyst eyes still not quite meeting the pureblood's. He took a sip of the piping hot liquid, set the cup down on the table and then helped himself to the food, making a sandwich from freshly grilled ham, slices of cheese and those of tomatoes. Kaname wasn't sure if he should be relieved or worried. He reached for a piece of toast and buttered it, his gaze sliding to the hunter from time to time. The meal went on for a couple of minutes in the same silence and Kaname finally couldn't take it anymore. Later, he would wonder if this was how Zero dealt with his children in the past but for now, he put down the rest of his toast. The squirming butterflies in his stomach weren't taking too kindly to it.

"Zero? Are you still angry with me?" he asked softly. Zero was chewing his sandwich in a preoccupied manner but he looked up and shook his head decidedly. The shock and betrayed anger that had swamped him when he first learned of Kaname's interference had pretty much disappeared. There was still some confusion and resentment but it was mostly caused by his smarting pride and both were tempered by this - this ridiculous compassion he kept feeling for Kaname. It was hard to stay angry at someone who had confessed his sins in that sincere shaky tone of voice, all the while looking as if he expected to be severely punished for it.

It was true that Zero had never before known nor cared what it was like to be a pureblood, having spent half his life thinking they were evil arrogant beings. He knew that Kaname was different but then, the pureblood was only related to him by marriage. Zero also knew that he was one of the very, very few persons that Kaname trusted... and yet he hadn't really known him all these years. Some friend, some relative he had turned out to be... all wrapped up in his happy little world, concerned only with his perfect life in being able to provide a comfortable living for Yuuki and his children. Zero realised he hadn't spared a single thought about how his wife's only relative had felt all these years. Of course, he could in all honesty say that it wasn't really his business in the first place... and that purebloods were notoriously private... and that they had been perceived love rivals at first... but his honesty wouldn't allow him to. Kaname Kuran wasn't some distant relative he saw only once a year during at Christmas. He was Yuuki's only and much cherished elder brother. He was Zero's primary blood source. He was someone his children adored.

In short, Kaname was someone very important to his family. This last thought brought a new wave of guilt and Zero put down his sandwich. He had felt guilty earlier for not being able to visit Yuuki's grave and now he felt guilty for not understanding Kaname for the past twenty over years. Just who was he supposed to feel guilty for next? And why should he feel guilty when he hadn't planned all this in the first place?

_Confusing. That's what all of this was, confusing as hell._

"Do you hate me now that you know?" Kaname asked again, his voice even more subdued than before. Zero sighed and shook his head.

"I don't hate you, Kaname. I wouldn't be sitting here eating with you if I did," he replied patiently. Kaname nodded but looked like he still expected a yes. Zero's gaze dropped to his sandwich and with another sigh, he pushed away his plate. He didn't feel like eating anymore.

"But why me?" he asked after a moment. "Why do you crave _my _bite?"

"I told you - perhaps it's because you are my first," Kaname replied. Zero's cheeks tingled with unexpected heat. He quickly looked away, lips pressed tightly together. Drat Kaname for his particular choice of words and the very wrong images it brought up! Suddenly, the bite that had happened so many years ago in an empty classroom just moments after Yuuki had chosen him against Kaname and with her as their sole witness took on a whole new meaning that Zero had never thought of before. It made that incident even more amazing to him in retrospect.

On that day, Kaame hadn't hesitated to kneel down in front of him. He had offered his pureblood neck with his usual implacable calm and neither Zero nor Yuuki had thought about it being his first bite, something most vampires considered to be as significant as their first sexual experience. Zero's eyes unfocused slightly as he relived that moment again in his mind. It had happened so long ago but he could still remember Kaname's slender body trembling against his while his senses were awash with so many other sensations - the laundry fresh scent of the pureblood's black silk shirt, the silky waves of his dark hair against his cheek, the unimaginably glorious, intoxicating taste of his blood... as well as the immense awe and gratitude that despite everything, Yuuki loved him...

Zero blinked and looked at Kaname again, reading shy uncertainty and a silent request for understanding in those open, trusting eyes. It was truly amazing. Zero honestly didn't know how Kaname could have kept secret a craving like that for so many years, with only those soft trembles hinting at how he was affected whenever he was bitten.

"Also, your fangs, Zero. They feel so good to me," Kaname admitted and this time, Zero's mouth fell open.

"Feels good?" he repeated. "_Good_? But why? And how can it? A bite is painful and - and degrading!"

"Painful? Degrading?" Kaname repeated, a frown marring his smooth brow. Then he shook his head. "No, Zero. Never that."

"But - but..." Zero shook his head in turn and spread his hands helplessly. "Kaname, how could it be otherwise?"

_Wait - what?_

Kaname was stunned but his adept mind quickly seized hold of Zero's surprising words and analysed it. Well, the hunter's opinion was logical, seeing as how no one else had bitten him ever since the female pureblood who had turned him with her bite - Shizuka Hiou. It was a given that she hadn't been gentle then but to have imprinted such a painful and hateful experience on a young boy like that... Despite his own sufferings, Kaname felt his heart constrict with compassion. He was forever grateful that Zero's path in life had crossed with his and that they were no longer enemies but he had always felt sorry for the budding vampire hunter who had suffered for four years before he finally found stability, acceptance and love. Kaname had no doubt at all that Zero had continued to drink Yuuki's blood over the years. The hunter might think himself more hunter than vampire but Kaname was observant enough to catch the little hints that they both indulged in this regularly, something that Yuuki was clearly more than agreeable to. Kaname now took a deep breath and fixed his gaze on Zero who again looked like the world had turned upside down and he didn't know which way was up.

"You only think that because of your own experience," Kaname began gently. "Just that one time. I know, it had to have been horrifying. Painful. Disgusting. Particularly since you were brought up to hate vampires. But what you said isn't wholly true, Zero. For example, there's a world of difference in how you bite me compared to how Shizuka bit you."

Kaname ignored Zero's sharply indrawn breath at that name and simply continued, his tone reassuring and matter of fact.

"Your bite has never been painful or cruel, Zero. I have no doubt at all that Yuuki thought the same."

Zero stared at him, his emotions caught by the way Kaname had said that - in that matter of fact tone of voice as if biting your loved one was a natural and affectionate act that one shouldn't be embarrassed about. His words evoked another memory that flared as brightly in Zero's mind eye as if it had happened only yesterday - he and Yuuki had almost been attacked by a rogue Level E while out in town one evening and Yuuki had admitted to being scared of the sight of fangs after that. Her words had torn Zero up inside thinking she had hidden her fear of his bite all this time but Yuuki was quick to lay his fears to rest, saying that the only thing that caused her pain was his own guilt at having to bite her to sate his blood lust. That night had ended in happy tears for both of them and Zero found himself blinking rapidly at the memory. He couldn't believe he had forgotten about that time. His heart gave a throb of remembrance and with it, a surge of longing and love for Yuuki. He drew a trembling breath.

"I never wanted to cause her pain, you know," he said huskily. This time, it was his own words that caused yet another memory to emerge. Zero felt the sting of a guilt that was more than twenty years old and swallowed hard. "But there was that one time when I lost control... and I-"

Kaname immediately caught onto what Zero was talking about. "When you started to fall to Level E," he murmured. Zero gave a single nod, his eyes stinging and his throat tight with a regret that should have long been put to rest.

"I was so sure you wanted to kill me then," he admitted in a whisper. "I - I would have let you, you know."

It wasn't the words but the absolute certainty in Zero's voice that floored Kaname.

_Dear God... _

If he hadn't controlled his anger that time and if Yuuki hadn't begged him not to, he might have gone to confront Zero in the furious state he was in and heaven only knew what might have happened then. A cold shiver of fear traced up Kaname's spine at the thought.

"That was different, Zero. You were falling," he insisted, thankful all over again that nothing had happened that night. Zero only shook his head and wiped the back of his hand over his eyes.

"I'm stable now but I still need blood every once in a while," he mumbled, his voice shaking a little. "My fangs still break skin each time, Kaname. My bite causes pain - how can you say it isn't hurtful and degrading to my victim? How can you even like it?"

This time, despite Zero's obvious guilt and pain, Kaname couldn't help but smile. Really, was that all a bite was to Zero? A mindless act of sinking teeth into food to get sustenance and nourishment where emotions were not considered part of the equation at all?

"Victim? Surely you don't really believe that, Zero," Kaname chided gently. "If you did, you never would have bitten Yuuki again after I promised you my blood but you still did. I know you did."

Yes, Zero drank Yuuki's blood regularly even though he didn't need to. It was an intimate and private act between them and Yuuki - bless her loving soul - had always convinced him that she wanted him to each time. To his embarrassment, Zero found himself blushing. Kaname stayed silent but his eyes devoured the sight of Zero's enchantingly pink cheeks and found himself torn between amusement, adoration and sheer unadulterated envy. Yuuki hadn't had a long life but it had been one rich with love and happiness while he...

"You bit her because of the closeness it afforded you both," Kaname said as steadily as he could. He didn't quite know how it happened but in the past minute or so, the tables had turned and he was now the one in control of the conversation. "You bit me because you needed to. I know you have never bitten either one of us with the intention to cause pain or to be cruel."

Kaname was determined to make Zero believe in what he said, so much that the hunter would never again doubt how very welcome his fangs were. There was no uncertainty in Kaname's voice now as he held Zero's tear filled gaze with his own compelling and intense one, the sincerity in his voice holding the latter's very soul captive.

"To Yuuki and I, your two very willing donors - _donors_, Zero, never victims - that made all the difference in the world."

Despite his control, Kaname's soft voice turned husky at the end. Yuuki had never openly spoken to him about Zero taking her blood but he knew they both shared the same view. He knew she would want her husband to know and believe in this as well. Zero gulped, finding his vision once again blurring for absolutely no reason. His throat was also swelling for the same non-existent reason.

"But Kaname... I..."

Kaname shook his head, silencing the confused hunter. The pureblood's earlier shame and guilt at having confessed his part in interfering with Zero's past missions had faded completely and he was once again filled with confidence. It was way past time to educate Zero on this fundamental fact that apparently every vampire knew except this very special one sitting opposite him now. Kaname only hoped it wouldn't freak Zero out too much.

"Zero, you are a vampire. I'm sure you know that biting someone can be a sensual experience and that it is very easy to get sexually aroused by it."

Well, _that _got Zero's attention all right - he flushed deeper, sat up straight and glared furiously at Kaname. Well, _that _may be true when it came to Yuuki and him - so many times, tasting her blood had ended in a sexually intimate session for both of them but it was always at _his _initiation, not hers... wasn't it? So what the hell was Kaname saying now? That he too found Zero's bite - to put it in his own words - 'a sensual experience' that left him - oh, God forbid - 'sexually aroused'?

Flustered beyond belief, Zero didn't know whether the involuntary shudder that shook him now was embarrassment, shock or disgust. Perhaps a mix of all three. After all, Kaname was a man and his brother-in-law, for Pete's sake!

"Kaname! You're not saying that when I - uh, I mean that you get - uhm, get..."

Kaname nodded solemnly, holding the hunter's shocked and almost horrified gaze with his calm one.

"I am, Zero. Each time you bite me."

_I find it a sensual experience that leaves me sexually aroused beyond belief._

- Chapter End -


	10. Chapter 10: The Truce

**Author Notes: **Hello everyone and thank you for all your wonderful reviews! _-beams- _I'm so happy you like my Kaname _-huggles him- _LOL it's a miracle but somehow, I've managed to snatch minutes here and there during this school hols so here is the next chapter! Enjoy...

- Chapter Start -

Zero felt his stomach drop to the carpeted floor at the combination of Kaname's words and the utter conviction in those dark eyes. His own eyes widened in shock.

"W-what?" he finally whispered past dry lips. His brain had retained the two phrases Kaname had said - 'sensual experience' and 'sexually aroused' - and was busy chattering the words back at him, over and over again. Kaname quickly nodded before he lost his nerve.

"Your fangs arouse me each time, Zero. Your bite has the power to affect me that way," he admitted steadily.

__

I know it's risky telling you this but still, I want you to know.

"I - you... b-but that's impossible!" Zero blustered, his face going from pale to red and back again, his fingers digging into the fabric covering the arm rests of his chair. A small part of Kaname's mind decided absently that he probably would have enjoyed the rather amusing sight if he weren't so nervous about the hunter's reaction.

"No, Zero, it isn't," Kaname countered as calmly as he could with his heart pounding away in his chest. "That's why I long for you to bite me all the time. That's why I couldn't take it when you reduced the frequency of your feedings over the years. That's why I... arranged for those Es. I - Zero, surely you must have suspected something of this sort?"

It was obvious from Zero's dumbfounded expression that he hadn't. Kaname already knew that but he was desperate for the hunter to believe his words - he had just laid bare his second last secret and was feeling horribly vulnerable. Kaname felt like he could possibly die if Zero scorned him now. Zero was in fact opening his mouth to deliver a scathing retort when the pained doubt in Kaname's dark eyes made him close his mouth again. He shifted uncomfortably in his chair instead. He had never before considered the possibility that Kaname might be feeling this, of all things, even though he had just learned this morning that the pureblood craved his bite.

But this - this very latest revelation! It put a very different slant on the agreement they had.

On how things stood between them. On how things had always stood between them, with Kaname being Zero's well off, powerful and generous blood donor.

On how they saw each other. On how they had always seen each other, with Yuuki being the one who had first brought them together.

On their friendship, now that they respected each other's strengths and character.

And most importantly, on the taboo feeding sessions that up until now had been the main backbone - or discourse, if you will - of their relationship.

"You're joking, Kaname. And it isn't funny," Zero said flatly, predictably choosing denial over the terrifying possibility that the pureblood was actually serious - he couldn't be! Kaname swallowed past a painfully tight throat. Had he honestly expected Zero to nod calmly as if they were just discussing the weather?

__

I knew it. He thinks me a freak.

"I'm not joking, Zero! Why would I even joke about something like this?" Kaname protested, striving to keep his voice steady. His hands were trembling and he clenched them tightly in his lap.

__

Why would I risk your scorn and put my pride on the line if it weren't completely true?

Zero pressed his lips together as if he had heard the silent plea. It was true - a pureblood didn't made jokes about being dependent on anyone else, much less a hunter and a Level D. But it wasn't right! So perhaps it was only uh... well, could vampire hormones would be the culprit, perhaps? After all, he couldn't deny he wasn't affected when he bit Yuuki...

"All right, so you're just confused then," Zero came at it from a different angle but he was starting to panic and he knew it. "Look, it's hormone-related, isn't it? I knew it! I just never - damn, we - no, I should have used cups or something-"

Zero broke off abruptly and glared at Kaname again when the pureblood gave a little gasp before uttering a surprised chuckle. Kaname couldn't help it - his stomach was all tied up in knots and he was shaking with nerves but what Zero said sounded like something Yuuki would have said!

"Damnit, this isn't funny, Kaname!" Zero insisted through clenched teeth. The pureblood quickly schooled his features. "I know," he began soothingly but Zero had started speaking again.

"Look, it's not funny and it's wrong. In fact, we shouldn't even be having this discussion in the first place!" he spoke tersely. But again, that strange raw hurt flashed in Kaname's eyes and Zero paused. Damnit, why did chastising the pureblood make him feel like a heartless bastard each time? Who was the one who had just gotten the shock of his life here? In fact, who was the one who had gotten nothing but shock after shock ever since he got here?

Zero reluctantly took in the faintly mulish cast to Kaname's lips that suggested the pureblood had told him the truth despite already knowing the other's reaction. That, more than anything else stopped Zero from going on with his tirade even though he felt he was fully justified in doing so. So could that mean this whole confusing thing about bites, addictions and being sexually aroused was true then?

Zero didn't want to consider it for even a second but there was a very small part of his conscience that had already known this. He had just never given it the chance to be processed by his conscious mind and had instead squashed it flat each time it arose... usually when he had sunk his fangs deep into that pale, tender neck and felt its owner's response. Zero groaned and sank his head into his hands, pushing long fingers through his hair and gripping the damp silver strands hard. What a mess!

Kaname stayed silent, his anxious eyes resting on the bent silver head. After half a minute of silence, Zero looked up and leveled an accusing glance at the patiently waiting pureblood.

"How could this have happened, Kaname? And why didn't you tell me?" Zero's gaze narrowed accusingly but Kaname merely sighed and spread his hands helplessly.

"Believe me, Zero. If I had known this would happen, I wouldn't have offered in the first place," he answered quietly. Zero opened his mouth and shut it again. He uttered a sigh before slumping back in his chair and closing his eyes. Kaname's fingers found the tie of his black robe and fiddled with it. He was usually very articulate but right now, his mind was a complete blank. Finally, Zero sat up again and eyed the pureblood with a thoughtful frown.

"If this is true," he began slowly, his tone warning Kaname not to make an issue about how he was accepting it as the truth. "If this is true, Kaname... then I had Yuuki to go back to. I always had her to return to. But you - well, you must have had..." Zero broke off, his embarrassment showing in the flush on his face. He hunched a shoulder. Heart to heart talks with Yuuki were easy enough with the love and wholehearted trust they had between them but this was different. He and Kaname didn't _have _talks, much less heart to heart ones.

__

Nope. Just very intimate sessions that had both your bodies pressed close together while you pushed your face into his neck...

Zero shifted uncomfortably as that small bit of his conscience perked up again, gleefully pointing out this fact and reveling in the truth being noted at last. Zero scowled at it but Kaname saw his reaction as a a warning that the hunter would accept nothing but the honest truth from him from now on even if it was horribly embarrassing and degrading. But as always, Kaname felt the need to obey this man and his lips twisted in a humourless smile.

The honest and simple truth was that Zero held his heart in the palm of his hand... and didn't even know it.

"What did I have, Zero? I had cold showers. I had cold showers and as many blood tablets as I needed."

__

And my right hand as a last resort whenever neither of those methods worked.

Zero read those silent, deprecating words in the eyes looking back at him and his mouth fell open. Then he closed his mouth and gulped. He truly hadn't thought much about Kaname and female companionship but surely the pureblood must have had someone - or rather, a lot of someones - to... well, to be with? Purebloods were rare and prized and Kaname was a real catch - there had to have been thousands of female nobles if not purebloods lining up - or fighting each other fang and nail - to throw themselves into his arms!

What was up with all those cold showers? And blood tablets?

Kaname saw the patent disbelief in Zero's eyes and quickly dipped his head to hide the blush flooding his cheeks again. Zero's reaction made him feel inadequate. Lacking. Old fashioned. Stupid. As if there had to be something seriously wrong with him for not taking full advantage of all the privileges his blood gave him and for wanting only one person's affections. It sounded so stupid when one put it like that. No, it _was _stupid but it was also the truth - Kaname just didn't want anyone else's affections but Zero's. He didn't want anyone to hold him or love him except his beloved hunter. Kaname's blush made Zero even more uneasy. He didn't like the way this conversation was going and he didn't like the strange urge inside him that made him want to lean closer, put the tips of his fingers under Kaname's chin and tip that face up to-

No. It was time to change the topic. Way past time.

"So - uhm, all those times you sicced those extra E's one me, they were because...?"

Kaname's flush hadn't dissipated but he raised his head obediently and gave a single nod. A warm swell of hope was slowly unfurling inside his battered heart because Zero was still here and miraculously, he didn't sound angry. In fact, he sounded curious more than anything else.

"Yes. I swear there was no other reason," Kaname replied quietly. Zero stared at him, unable to tear his gaze away from the strangely beguiling sight of a rosy cheeked Kaname. He was still a little horrified at the pureblood's startling revelation but he was also... impressed, however reluctantly. Zero honestly didn't know if he would ever have the guts to say something as embarrassing as this if the tables were turned but there was nothing but transparent honesty in those dark eyes. Once again, Zero was forced to face the fact that Kaname Kuran trusted him a whole, whole lot.

It was dangerous to both the giver and the receiver of such trust. It was dangerous for a pureblood to give that much trust to someone who wasn't his mate and yet... here he sat - Zero Kiryuu, a hunter and a Level D, holding in his most unwilling hands, the knowledge that Kaname Kuran craved his bite and found it arousing and alluring. The sheer power of what that meant terrified Zero - why wouldn't he be? And yet... a part of him couldn't help but find it paradoxically fascinating. To know that you had the power to render such a powerful, exalted, sought after and beautiful being helpless and weak kneed... practically yours to command as you wish... to do as you would... Kaname blinked and wet his lips nervously under Zero's unblinking and intense scrutiny.

"Zero, can you truly say that you are unmoved each time you feed from me?" Kaname asked at last. His calm tone belied how anxious he was that Zero would not deny whatever it was he felt each time he latched onto his donor's neck. Kaname just wanted the hunter to admit that he wasn't the only one left trembling and full of longing from each encounter. Zero tore his gaze away from the earnest looking pureblood. His mind was conjuring up all sorts of strange ideas and even stranger images from Kaname's words.

"That's different!" Zero protested and the words were telling in themselves. "I - I never wanted to..." he floundered and even though Kaname was relieved at what the words meant, the smile that hovered on his lips was sad.

"You wouldn't be betraying Yuuki's memory by admitting to your vampire side," he said quietly. Zero set his jaw and folded his arms across his chest, the need to be honest warring with the need to protect his love for Yuuki. But really... why did he need to do that? At least, why was there the need to pretend when he was talking with the very person who loved her just as much as he did?

"I loved her too, you know," Kaname prompted very gently. Zero gave him a startled glance before nodding. "All right," he murmured. "All right, so it can be uh... arou - uh, affecting..."

Kaname found himself torn between a smile and a sigh as how stubborn Zero could be. Any other vampire would have exulted in the power they held over him and taken full advantage of it but Zero still looked like it was a curse more than a privilege. Still, admittance was the first step towards... acceptance perhaps? Kaname's heart begged for more but he refused to let it hope any further than that. Not now when everything looked so uncertain and he still felt like he had laid himself bare.

"That's all I need to know for now, Zero. Thank you," he murmured but instead of being appeased, Zero looked even more annoyed.

"This is wrong so don't thank me!" he insisted. "I'm not supposed to feel anything when we - I mean, I'm only supposed to feel like that with Yuuki!"

Kaname sighed. Acceptance was apparently still a long way off and there was no way to force it closer. Still, at least he still had the feedings to look forward to.

"You will continue to take from me, won't you?" he asked quietly. Zero hesitated before he nodded slowly and pretended not to see the relief in Kaname's eyes.

"I don't have a choice, do I?" he answered bluntly. Kaname flinched and looked down again. He might be Zero's only donor now but the hunter didn't quite have to put it quite like that, as if it he were being forced - Kaname's thoughts broke off when a warm hand squeezed his briefly. Zero had leaned forward, his amethyst eyes steady and sure.

"Look, I didn't mean it like that. I am grateful, Kaname. You've never hesitated to give me your blood all these years. But..."

"But what?" Kaname asked when Zero broke off, looking uncomfortable again.

"But what do you intend to do about... it?" the hunter asked, speaking carefully. Kaname frowned. "About what?"

Zero sighed and folded his arms. "Your feelings," he elaborated grumpily. Kaname's lips twisted wryly - trust Zero to make it sound like he had a contagious disease!

"Nothing... I guess," he answered hesitantly.

__

It's up to you, isn't it?

Zero's eyebrow raised sceptically. "Nothing?" he repeated.

"There's nothing much I can do about it, is there?" Kaname countered a little stiffly, pride rearing its head at last. But relief was there as well - now that Zero knew, at least Kaname didn't have to hide how he felt anymore. He could fully enjoy having Zero feed from him and perhaps even let his feelings show more openly.

__

Even if I will have to deal with it the way I always have. Alone, while Zero goes back to-

Kaname inhaled sharply as the realisation hit him at last - Yuuki wasn't here anymore. Kaname felt his heart speed up as a ray of hope unexpectedly beckoned to him.

"What about you?" he asked Zero carefully in turn. The hunter frowned at him. "What about me?" he asked shortly.

"How will you deal with your own feelings?" Kaname asked, still speaking in that carefully neutral tone.

__

Oh...!

Zero's eyes widened. The next time he bit Kaname, he would feel the pureblood trembling again and know for sure how and why Kaname was reacting to his fangs. Worse, he would also feel similar emotions and would have to deal with them himself now that Yuuki was gone. It was something that was rather frightening, highly embarrassing and yet strangely intruiging. Which again, was completely wrong!

Kaname saw the conflicting and uneasy thoughts mirrored on Zero's face and leaned forward swiftly, reaching out for the other's arm. He wanted to reassure Zero that he didn't have to feel guilty about continuing to take his blood but in his urgency, Kaname had moved too fast. Zero panicked. To be honest, he didn't even know why he should since they were just sitting down and talking but all he could think of at that moment was that Kaname was a pureblood male and having confessed how much he craved and was aroused by Zero's bite, might actually force Zero to drink from him and in the throes of sexual excitement might actually forget himself and even... jump... him...

Zero practically leapt out of his chair in his haste to put more space between him and Kaname. In a heartbeat, he was standing on the other side of his chair, eyes wide and both hands thrown up in a purely defensive gesture.

"No!" he said, more sharply than he had intended. "Not now, Kaname!"

Kaname froze on the spot with one hand still outstretched, his wide eyes fixed on Zero's upflung arms with horror.

_Oh God._

Did Zero think that he was about to - to _attack _him? The sheer impossibility of that stunned Kaname and left his heart pounding again in his chest. He felt almost sick with dread.

__

Oh God. No...

Yes, he was a pureblood with untold powers and strength. Yes, his very word was law to every other vampire who wasn't a pureblood... but he was as helpless as a baby in Zero's arms! Kaname swallowed, his breath hitching hard in his tightly swollen throat. Did his beloved hunter now think that he was nothing but a depraved monster who would just take whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted it?

"No, Zero, no!" Kaname protested shakily. "I... I'm not going to do anything!"

Kaname tried to make his voice reassuring but it was trembling. He swallowed again, fighting the pain clenching his heart in vice like grip. For a moment there, Zero had looked like he was actually afraid of him and Kaname couldn't believe how unbelievably painful he found it.

"I would _never _hurt you," he whispered, his eyes wide and beseeching. "I would never force you to do anything you didn't want to..."

Zero caught hold of himself and felt a cold wave of self disgust wash over him, leaving his face hot with embarrassment. He toook a deep breath and shook his head.

__

Get a grip, Kiryuu! You're acting like a child - Kaname's a pureblood but he's never attacked you!

It was true. Kaname could have jumped him during any of those missions when he had been injured and weakened but all the pureblood had done was feed him and stayed with him until he healed before secretly dealing with his feelings by himself.

"Sorry," Zero said hoarsely. It was true he had had one shock after another but he hadn't meant to make Kaname feel this guilty. "Look, I didn't mean to-" He broke off and flushed uncomfortably again. Kaname quickly shook his head.

"No. Don't apologise, Zero," he said softly. "None of this was your fault. It was mine and mine alone."

Zero shook his head again. "It's not your fault, Kaname," he insisted. "And I didn't mean to imply that you would - uhm, you know..." he drifted off, not knowing how to put it into words. Kaname forced a small smile and a shrug - he would love for the hunter to jump _him _but the very idea would likely make the hunter jump right out the window instead. Kaname took a deep breath, still trembling at how unbelievably hurt he had been by Zero's mistaken assumption.

__

Don't ever look at me like that, Zero. Please, please don't.

"It's all right," he said, his voice still shaking a little. "But I would never hurt you, Zero. Please believe me."

Zero only gave a jerk of a nod before forcing himself to move forward to sit in his chair again. In the awkward silence that followed, Kaname felt something hot prick at the backs of his eyes. Why did it have to turn out like this? He couldn't deny that he had hoped Zero would be curious enough to put his words to the test by insisting on another feeding session but judging from his wide eyed expression, it was far too soon.

__

I've bungled up. Again.

"I still want you to take from me, Zero. But it doesn't have to be right now," Kaname said softly. He was lying but it didn't matter. All that mattered right now was ensuring that Zero had nothing to fear from him. "It's OK."

Zero should be relieved at this reprieve but strangely, all he felt was annoyance. He bit his lip and looked away, angry at having behaved like a child and having to be reassured like one. The silence that followed was even more awkward than before. Kaname decided it was time to let the topic drop even though it wasn't fully resolved yet.

"Let's finish our breakfast, shall we?"

Zero nodded again and the rest of the meal was completed in that same awkward silence, neither of them meeting the other's gaze. Appetite had deserted them both and they merely went through the motions of chewing and swallowing for appearance sake, the food sticking in their throats. Kaname poured Zero a fresh cup of coffee. He knew that he should be happier than how he was feeling now. After all, Zero was still here with him and appeared to have accepted what he had learned so far but well, now what? They still had a good few hours before flying back and Kaname didn't want to spend those hours by himself. He waited until after Zero had finished his sandwich before broaching the subject.

"Zero?" he spoke carefully. "We still have some time before we go back. How about going out for a while?"

Zero hesitated. It was in all likelihood an innocent offer but he couldn't stop thinking about how Kaname was affected by his bite and it now threw a very different slant on everything the pureblood said or did. But that wasn't being fair to Kaname, was it? Zero decided that he was just reading too much into things.

"I... OK," he agreed. It was still better than staying cooped up in the hotel room with their adjoining doors.

"We'll just drive into the city and see if there's anything interesting going on," Kaname elaborated casually. Zero recognised the offer for what it was and nodded. For the first time in the past half hour, he relaxed enough to even give a small smile and Kaname's heart swelled with sheer, sweet relief.

"All right," Zero agreed and his smile turned self-deprecating. "I... sorry I over reacted earlier, Kaname," he apologised. Kaname could have hugged the hunter in sheer joy.

"You have absolutely nothing to apologise for," he said huskily. "I know I've given you shock after shock since we got here and yet you're still speaking to me."

Zero slanted him a wry look. "What else would I be doing?" he returned dryly and Kaname couldn't help smiling at that. Miraculously enough, it dissipated the awkwardness between them and both men relaxed a little.

"Let's get changed then?" Kaname suggested and Zero nodded.

"Give me five minutes," he said and stood up. Kaname nodded and watched the hunter enter his room through their adjoining doors before leaning back in his chair and closing his eyes. All things considered, he should be very happy that Zero hadn't bolted from his room and had even agreed to go out for a while but the heart is never satisfied with what it has attained so far, especially a heart that has been starving for so years.

__

I'm thankful, I truly am. But Zero, will you hate me if you know how I truly feel about you?

- Chapter End -


	11. Chapter 11: The Waiting

**Author Notes: **Hey everyone! I've not forgotten about these two boys either _-smiles- _Thank you for your patience, enjoy reading this chapter and watch out for the next one!

- Chapter Start -

_The next morning..._

As was his habit over the past month, Zero got up early despite the little sleep he had. He wanted to visit Yuuki. He had been away for only a couple of days but with all that he had learned, it felt as if a week had passed. There was a dull, heavy ache in his heart that he knew would never completely go away no matter how much time passed but it seemed a little less heavy, a little less acute this morning. Quietly, Zero made his way past the neatly laid out graves. He knelt down beside a very special one and laid down the bunch of white daisies in his hand.

"Hello dearest, I'm back," he murmured softly, reaching out to touch the young blades of grass that had grown on the ground. "I miss you so much and I'm sorry I couldn't visit over the past two days. I followed Kaname, remember? He had a meeting and oh, you wouldn't believe what he-"

The words were there... right there on the tip of his tongue and just waiting to be said out loud but Zero's voice faltered. He flushed with embarrassment and looked down instead. There was an uneasy lump of guilt in his heart and he knew why that was. He needed to talk to someone and he wanted that someone to be Yuuki. After all, they shared everything, they always had since the day Yuuki declared her love for him with Kaname as her witness. It was that same day that Zero finally found hope to go on living. Hope, love and a solution to his impending fall to madness. But right now, the words just couldn't be said out loud. Zero wasn't quite sure why. Yuuki would never condemn her beloved nii-san if she knew. To her, Kaname could do no wrong. And even if deliberately causing her husband to be injured by those Level Es was undeniably wrong, she had always been a loving and generous soul. It wouldn't be difficult to earn her forgiveness once she knew of the true reason why her brother did that. Being human, she had never experienced the pain of blood lust but she did understand loneliness, the need for companionship and a sense of belonging.

Zero sighed and dipped his head, oblivious of the cool morning breeze flirting with his silver hair. He so wanted to tell Yuuki about the revelations he had learned during the trip. He had probably found out more about Kaname in those few hours than he had over the thirty odd years they had known each other. The pureblood wasn't just this omnipotent perfect being who looked and behaved like he wanted for nothing and needed nothing save for the occassional visit to see his younger sister and her family. He was very, very human in that he was lonely and that he had cravings and needs. Nothing out of the ordinary, really, if you stopped to think about it - everyone had needs, even leaders and people whom others looked up to, placed on pedestals, worshipped and obeyed without question. But the extraordinary thing was not that Kaname was like everyone else but that those needs were centered around and inextricably linked with Zero, and that he needed the hunter to assuage them. Zero felt his cheeks burn even hotter at the thought. He took a deep breath and tried again - very haltingly - to explain to Yuuki how Kaname had felt all these years but he had no idea if the disjointed and often mumbled words made sense to her, if she could hear them. Zero finally fell silent, his fingertips gently traced his beloved wife's name engraved in the unforgiving marble.

"Yuuki," he finally murmured, "I swear I didn't know... honest to God, I never knew just how he felt all these years about me biting him. I'm sure you didn't either, otherwise you would've told me. To think we've been so happy all this time while he..."

_While he suffered in silence._

Zero paused to swallow a sudden lump that appeared in his throat. Nothing could affect him like guilt could. He was a softie, that's what he was... Zero roused himself and shook his head wryly, a hint of a smile on his lips.

"Funny, huh? A Level D hunter sympathising with a pureblood?"

But he knew and he knew that Yuuki felt the same way he did, that Kaname wasn't _just _a pureblood. Just like Zero himself wasn't _just _a Level D. Not to each other. They were related by marriage and connected by a very gentle soul whose love had brought them closer to one another. But more than that, they were now bound by an act that had started out of love for that same special soul and had now grown to something that left one of them helplessly dependent on the other and the other scared and confused. Still, Zero couldn't help thinking that Yuuki would have accepted it more easily than he had if she were still here.

"You've always known, haven't you, dearest, that Kaname is more than just your brother and more than just my benefactor?" Zero frowned as he searched for the right words to say. He didn't realised that in speaking to Yuuki, he was also trying to clarify the confusing whirl of emotions inside him.

"I mean, he's always been there for us but we've not been there for him. He's never said it but I know he's protected us all these years from the other purebloods... those who would harm us if they knew of our importance to him. He's..."

Again, Zero paused as he searched for the right word to say. It was as if Yuuki could really hear him and he wanted her to understand how he felt. He needed her to understand how he felt even though he himself wasn't quite sure what it was.

"He cares for us very much. He's a good person," he finally concluded softly. Zero knew he was talking to the last person in the world who would disagree with him on this and yet, that stupid warmth in his cheeks refused to subside. Was it because Kaname was a pureblood, the natural enemy of a vampire hunter? Was it because he had never really praised Kaname in front of Yuuki? Or was it because he _was _a hunter, trained to believe that there was no such thing as a 'good' pureblood even though he knew there was? Or was it because Kaname was just so darned... _appealing_, something that had never bothered Zero before?

Zero continued to absently trace the engraved words on the tombstone as he thought back to those hours in the hotel room. Kaname had looked so lost, earnest and even almost helpless as he tried to explain his actions, as he gave the reason for them, as he pleaded for Zero to believe him, as he tried to get the hunter's assurance that he would continue to take from him. Zero closed his eyes as his body gave a strange little shiver. Strange because it wasn't borne of disgust. He couldn't help finding the images of Kaname like that disturbingly attractive and incredibly, undeniably compelling.

Zero did understand now why Kaname deliberately got him injured in those missions. He did believe the pureblood's words that that was the only reason why those Es were there. He did intend to go on taking that pure blood for as long as it was offered. But he still had no idea what to do about the additional baggage that would continue to come along with the feedings and the emotions that would inevitably arise. There was no one he could go to now. The very thought of visiting someone who would want payment for her services was an abhorrent thought for him. Yuuki... he could never forgive himself if he did that, especially if there was no love involved. He didn't want to even contemplate a meaningless transaction like that. But even more abhorrent was the other alternative, that of Kaname and himself er... assuaging each other's feelings - no! Completely out of the question! They were related for God's sake and they were males!

No. The only viable outcome was for each of them to take care of their own problem. Zero nodded his head grimly to himself, having come to the only conclusion he could accept.

_I'll have to deal with it myself, the way Kaname always have. End of story._

Zero realised it was getting hotter now. The sun was steadily climbing in the sky so he got up reluctantly and brushed off his pants. He had some grocery shopping to do.

"I'll come back to see you tomorrow morning, dearest," he said softly as he gazed at the picture of the sweet heart shaped face embedded into the marble before walking away. He felt calmer now after telling her what had happened. Anyway, there were a few days left before Kaname's next visit so there was no point in thinking about what would happen when the pureblood did turn up.

But again, there was that stupid warmth tingling in his cheeks! Zero scowled as he made his way to the gates. He wasn't going to think about Kaname anymore, he wasn't!

- o -

_Four days later..._

Zero gulped down the rest of the water from his bottle before running a hand over his sweaty forehead. Phew! Enough. He looped his towel around his neck, switched off the school gym lights and closed the door before heading back to the main quarters. He had just completed another grueling regime of running, jump rope skipping, push ups and crunches - an hour and a half of non stop physical exertion. His muscles ached and his entire body was trembling with exhaustion, indicating he had punished it enough. But the trouble is, it wasn't enough. It still wasn't _exhausting _enough to make him forget about Kaname Kuran or the things he had said that turned the hunter's world upside down a week ago.

Zero frowned without realising it as he made his way back to the Chairman's quarters. Things had actually gotten a little better in the past few days. For one thing, he could walk around the school and even take meals at the school canteen without his memories overwhelming him. There was still a sweet, sad ache in his chest each time he came across a certain spot in school that held sweet memories for him but he could and did still walk past that place with his head high. He could actually think of what to cook for his next meal... and eat all that he cooked. But Zero still couldn't stop thinking about that dratted pureblood... and the things that he had learned.

Actually, the rest of that trip with Kaname had actually been pretty uneventful. After getting changed, they had gone to town and spent about half an hour watching a few street acrobatics who were actually normal class vampires making use of their natural strength and agility to either earn a living amongst the unsuspecting humans or just for kicks. Kaname had been careful to mute his aura completely - the last thing he wanted was draw attention to himself by having the other vampires bow to him.

After that, they had taken an early lunch at an uptown cafe frequented by vampire nobles before leaving for the airport. There was the usual round of bowing and scraping for Kaname and speculative, curious glances for Zero who again pretended to be Kaname's bodyguard. Nothing out of the ordinary... except that Kaname was back to his usual composed and implacable self. There wasn't a hint of the insecurity he had openly shown Zero earlier. Kaname didn't mention anything about his past actions or reactions that had stunned the hunter. It was as if those shocking conversations had never taken place at all! Zero, grateful to be spared anymore embarrassing conversations, had responded in kind, playing his aloof but watchful bodyguard role to perfection. Even when they had boarded Kaname's private jet, they merely exchanged casual words before Kaname buried himself in paperwork, leaving a rather nonplussed Zero to leaf through a thriller, sip his orange juice and glance curiously at the pureblood from time to time.

Zero _was _relieved. It just felt a bit strange... as if Kaname's shy revelations had never taken place at all. By the time they landed and got into the waiting limousine though, Zero's relief was mixed with a dash of annoyance. After being persuaded to believe that Kaname lived for his bite and had even resorted to underhand tactics to get it, it was... well, a bit of a letdown to be so completely ignored for the past two hours or so. The slightly miffed hunter brooded over this as he kept his gaze on the window beside him, hardly taking in the scenery that flashed by. It was only when the limousine stopped right outside the Chairman's quarters in Cross Academy that Kaname brought up the topic again. By that time, Zero was feeling more than a bit annoyed. He muttered a brief, ungrateful sounding 'Thanks for the trip' and reached for the door handle. Kaname was quicker, his hand closing over the hunter's arm. Zero stiffened at the contact and swung around, his heart suddenly leaping into his throat.

"Yes?" he spoke. His eyes filled with instant wariness when he saw how intently Kaname was watching him.

_It... wasn't a dream._

"I'm not going in with you, Zero. I'm not going to ask you to bite me now," Kaname reassured him quickly. There was a small, deprecating smile playing about his lips as he spoke.

_Even though I would love it if you did._

"Oh," Zero muttered. He felt somewhat foolish but strangely relieved at the same time that Kaname had brought the topic up himself. It made Zero feel a bit better, that he hadn't actually been crazy enough to dream about Kaname craving his bite. Zero couldn't deny the trepidation that had started to fill him as they neared Cross Academy, wondering if Kaname would make his move then. But once again, the pureblood surprised him.

"Zero, promise me that you will call me the instant you need to feed, regardless of when, where or why," Kaname continued, his dark eyes silently adding emphasis to his request. "Anytime, Zero, call me anytime at all."

_Call me even if you don't need to feed. Just call me._

Zero nodded slowly. Their driver already gotten down from the limo and was standing outside Zero's door with one hand on the handle. The windows were fully tinted so Kaname ignored him and kept his hand on Zero's arm. He wasn't finished yet.

"I will be here on Friday night... and will leave on Sunday," he added. Zero caught the meaning in those dark intent eyes. It was now Sunday night. Kaname was going to give him five days' reprieve and no more. He wanted... no, he _expected _to be bitten then. Zero's lips quirked in a wry little smile as his brain came to this conclusion - he couldn't help it. He was in such an enviable position, wasn't he? If only he could get rid of the ever present guilt that flooded him each time and feel that it was a perfectly normal urge rather than a curse.

"I know what you mean, Kaname," he replied quietly. Kaname nodded slowly. In truth, he ached for Zero's bite. He had been suffering in silence for the past six hours or so but he also knew that Zero needed the time to absorb and accept what he had learned. Kaname knew he had shocked the hunter deeply - Zero actually jumping up and moving away from him earlier was ample proof of that. That act alone had hurt Kaname far more deeply than Zero's stunned words of denial. Kaname was adamant that the hunter would not have any other cause to be afraid of him in future. He repeated to himself numerous times over the past few hours that the present situation wasn't actually too bad. Zero hadn't gone mad or run out on him or vowed never to see him again. Kaname told himself that he could wait a few days more if it meant that he would get his reward then. The word 'reward' made Kaname's lips quirk in a wry little smile as he came to this conclusion - he couldn't help it. Zero's bite felt like more and more of a treat to him. If only he could get rid of the hunter's ever present guilt and make him feel that it was a perfectly normal urge than a curse.

Both Zero and Kaname were looking at each other and read the deprecating thoughts in each other's eyes at the same time. For a moment, they were both stunned. Then they started smiling and shaking their heads. In a matter of seconds, the awkwardness that had started to build up between them dissipated. Zero glanced at the heavily tinted window beside him. There was no way the driver could see or hear him so he decided it was safe enough.

"All right. I promise to bite you on your next visit, Kaname," he answered the silent, hopeful question in the pureblood's eyes. Kaname's resulting smile was bright and unbelievably sweet. Despite himself, Zero's breath caught in his throat and his cheeks tingled with warmth. He had seen Kaname give similar smiles to Yuuki in the past but this time... _this _time, Kaname's smile was for him alone. Zero found himself treasuring that smile. He didn't know why... he just did. Even the pang that squeezed Zero's heart at the thought of Yuuki seemed a little less tight than before.

"Zero," Kaname's eyes glowed fervently. "I would get the driver to drive around the school and come right back again if... if that would count as my next visit." He darted a shy glance at the hunter as he spoke, not bothering to hide the longing in his voice. Zero quickly ducked his head, his face growing even hotter. Trust Kaname to make him feel like a schoolboy all over again! He lifted his head and scowled at the pureblood.

"It doesn't and you know it," he retorted but Kaname only shrugged, still smiling. Zero shook his head resignedly. He was just about to turn towards the door when Kaname did something that floored him completely. The pureblood leaned forward and pressed his lips to Zero's warm cheek in a swift kiss, pulling back before the hunter could react.

"Take care," Kaname whispered. Zero gulped and stared at him, his eyes going wide.

"Wh-what the hell was _that _for?" he blustered, one hand automatically going up to rub at his cheek. Hell, he could still feel the imprint of those soft lips... Zero scowled heavily at Kaname but again, the pureblood only smiled.

"Just a salutation," he murmured. Zero muttered something that sounded like a "Hmphh!" before he fumbled at the door handle, almost falling out of the car in his haste to put some room between him and this beautiful, confounding creature who always managed to stun him speechless. At that moment, Zero almost regretted the promise he had made.

_Almost._

- o -

Zero blinked when he found himself standing outside his bathroom. Today was Friday and it was already ten o'clock at night. Zero hadn't called Kaname all week, not because he hadn't thought about it but because he hadn't wanted to disturb the pureblood. Or more truthfully, he hadn't wanted to seem... lonely. Zero hadn't wanted to seem that desperate for company. Surprisingly, Kaname hadn't called him either. He could have been too busy or he could have forgotten. But then again... and Zero's just only slowing down heart started to speed up again in an annoyingly treacherous way.

Kaname had never forgotten a promise. That meant that he was going to turn up tonight. Unless he was dead.

Zero had never forgotten a promise either. That meant that he was going to bite Kaname tonight. Oh, he was _so _dead.

- o -

At eleven, the sleek black limousine drove past the Cross Academy gates. The school grounds were quiet since the Night Class nobles were in session and the school prefects were doing their job, making sure none of the Day Class students broke curfew. Kaname uttered a happy little sigh and folded up his newspapers. He took a few calming breaths but his stupid, hopeless heart persisted in its erratic, excited beating. He had come home after five long torturous days. Yes... Kaname did indeed think of Cross Academy as home even though he had many luxurious houses and apartments in his name... because home was where Zero Kiryuu resided.

Kaname sat up a little straighter, passing his tongue over dry lips with almost giddy anticipation. Zero had promised to bite him tonight and Kaname could hardly wait. He had planned well for this visit and was prepared for any excuse the hunter chose to throw at him.

If Zero insisted that they ate first, then fine. Kaname had medium rare steaks, freshly baked pizza, Caesar salad, Chinese takeout and both red and white wine waiting in the boot of the limousine. All them of them were properly packed - kept either warm or cool - and ready to served at a moment's notice.

If Zero insisted that his blood donor was shower-fresh, then fine. Kaname had scrubbed himself thoroughly from head to foot and was wearing clothes fresh from the laundry. He swore he had never felt so clean in his life.

If Zero insisted that there was a movie or a game he wanted to catch on TV first, then fine. Kaname had no problems at all waiting as long as he got to share the sofa with Zero. As long as after that, he got his reward of feeling Zero's fangs deep in his flesh once more, of feeling his blood being drawn with care and most especially, of feeling Zero's strong arms around him while he fed. Kaname would do anything to feel both desired and needed by his beloved hunter.

_As long as you keep your promise, Zero, I would do anything you ask me to._

- Chapter End -


	12. Chapter 12: The Reward

**Author Notes: **Hello everyone! Sorry for not updating earlier, been completely swamped by work (check out my profile if you want to read my grouses :)) and didn't have energy to do more than crawl into bed each night for the past one week, completely drained. Thank you once again for your wonderful reviews that made me want to do nothing but hide myself somewhere to write _-smiles- _In fact, I had already written half this chapter two weeks ago but it's finally completed now.

Oh, the Akira in this story isn't the same one as in TOHOM but I just can't think of another name right now _–is resigned to the fact that all Kaname's drivers are henceforth named Akira-_ :D Anyway, enjoy this chapter!

- Chapter Start -

Zero was sitting on the sofa with the TV remote in hand when Kaname's presence brushed very lightly across his senses. That meant that the pureblood was approaching Cross Academy and hadn't muted his aura. The Night Class students might not yet be aware of his presence but then, they hadn't taken Kaname's blood regularly over the past thirty years like Zero had, and straight from the source too.

Zero stopped flicking through the TV channels at once, his body tense with awareness. He had been channel surfing for the past ten minutes, unable to concentrate on any of the programs or commercials he came across. He was also hungry after physically exhausting himself in the gym but he hadn't cooked anything either. It wasn't that the fridge was bare or that he didn't know what to cook. Zero just wasn't sure if Kaname had already eaten or if he had brought something for the both of them. Kaname had a habit of bringing food from top class restaurants or gourmet food shops if he happened to drop by the school when it was close to mealtimes. In fact, it had become something of a family tradition for Yuuki and the children to enjoy the sight of Zero telling Kaname off each time, saying that family members didn't do that sort of thing and it was no trouble for him to whip up something extra. And as was always the case, the pureblood's charming smiles would end up making Zero sound like a fussy housewife. An ineffectual one as well, since he often found his words drowned out by his children's exclamations of delight and chorus of thanks.

Zero decisively pressed the 'Off' button on the TV remote and set it down carefully on the coffee table. In the sudden silence, he took a deep breath. He realised his fingers were trembling very slightly and huffed in exasperation. Oh, this was ridiculous! He was acting as if Kaname was here to take him out to dinner or something! This wasn't the first time the pureblood had come to Cross Academy specifically to feed him so there was absolutely nothing for Zero to be nervous about. But that was before he knew how Kaname felt about his bite...

Zero exhaled and rubbed his face with his hands before pushing his damp hair away from his forehead. He had taken his shower fifteen minutes ago without giving his body a chance to cool down completely. As a result, there was a thin layer of perspiration on his skin, making his cotton T-shirt cling to his chest and back. He shrugged philosophically at this - no doubt Kaname was going to turn up on his doorstep shower fresh and smelling like a million dollars. Zero couldn't recall the pureblood smelling anything less than clean and delicious each time he fed from him.

_Wait - delicious? Where the hell had _that _come from?_

Zero groaned and rubbed his face with his hands again. He was going mad. He had to be. Why else was he behaving like a nervous teenager on his first date? He had taken Kaname's blood for years, for Pete's sake! Decades even! He had also spent a good part of those years steadfastly trying to reduce the frequency of his feedings so he wouldn't feel so guilty about trespassing on Kaname's goodwill but the trouble was, it hadn't abated his longing for that delicious, potent nectar in the least. In fact, he wanted it even more now that he realised Kaname was perfectly willing in this matter. The mere thought of placing his lips against that soft, sweet smelling skin... feeling the enticing, quickening pulse just below that... hearing the sweet rush of warm liquid propelled from that pulse with each heartbeat... sinking his fangs into that tender flesh... feeling the sensation of skin breaking and muscle tendons parting... experiencing the inevitable shiver running through that slender body next to his, hearing that soft, sharp inhalation from his donor... sucking that rich, warm and intoxicating liquid into his mouth and letting it slide down his throat, dousing the fire in his veins and quenching the thirst in his soul...

_Dear God!_

It was more than enough to make Zero's fangs throb sharply with remembered longing. Yuuki's neck had been just as soft and sweet smelling, her skin just as creamy smooth. Her blood had to be the sweetest Zero had ever tasted, partly because of her heritage but mostly because of the love and trust they shared with each other and the comfortable knowledge that sensual intimacy would inevitably follow. So why, _why _in God's name was he now hungering for Kaname's blood instead of hers?

What was this irresistible pull that his blood had that Yuuki's didn't?

And why, _why _was another part of Zero's body stirring to life at the knowledge that he was going to get that pure blood very, very soon?

Zero gave another groan and dropped his head into his trembling hands.

Was it because Kaname's blood not only tasted extremely good but also contained the promise of power as well as the ability to heal, to stablise and to strengthen?

Was it because of the deliciously taboo aspect of it, of knowing that they were both indulging in something that others must never, ever find out?

Or was it simply because Yuuki was no longer here but Kaname was and had left Zero in no doubt of his utter willingness?

Zero shook his head in utter bemusement. Yuuki had never denied him access to her blood or her body. She was always sweetly giving in both aspects and had even insisted that he bit her during both her pregnancies. Zero only agreed on the condition that he took a little each time and strictly for the intimacy it gave them both, not for the purpose of healing from injuries or to quench his blood lust. In fact, when Kaname found out that Yuuki was pregnant, he had reminded them both that the privilege of providing Zero with large amounts of blood was his and his alone so that Yuuki's health would never be compromised. Zero could still recall the brief but meaningful look he had traded with Kaname then. It was an unspoken agreement between them that Yuuki never found out about her husband's mission-related injuries if they both could help it.

For now though, all Zero could think about was that Kaname had arrived and that he both wanted and expected to be bitten. Tonight. The very thought sent a shiver of awe through Zero's body. He had come so close to losing hope twice - the first time when he was falling to Level E and the second time when Yuuki passed away. Kaname had saved him both times with the promise of his pure blood. Zero knew he could from now on depend on Kaname for as much blood as he could wish for, and as often as he wanted it, to hell with 'why'. The very thought of this was more staggering than finding out he had won the lottery. Any lottery.

_What did I ever do to get a privilege that any other vampire would kill for?_

The only answer Zero got was the sudden chime of the doorbell. His heart jumped from his chest into his throat, gone from slightly fast to hyper speed in less than a second. He jumped up and bumped his knee hard against the side of the coffee table.

"Shit!" he cursed, bending over to rub at his smarting joint.

Kaname was here.

- o -

Kaname's face lit up with a warm smile when Zero opened the front door. The pureblood drank in the sight of the hunter framed in the doorway with silver hair still damp from the shower, dressed in a round necked T-shirt and jeans, and smelling of a most glorious mix of shampoo, soap and warm, pure... well, er... warm, pure _Zeroness_. At that moment, Kaname didn't care that his extensive vocabulary had just gone down the drain. It was all he could do to not step forward, throw his arms around the hunter and beg to be bitten right there and then.

"Hello, Zero."

Kaname's words came out sounding just a little bit breathless but Zero only nodded. Damn, Kaname looked as good as he ever did, dressed in a black silk shirt and cream linen trousers. He smelled even better. But it was the shyly eager hope in those brown eyes that made Zero's heart trip over itself. It was obvious Kaname had kept the hunter's promise close to his heart... the promise that was now hanging over Zero's head like the proverbial Sword of Damocles.

"Hey, Kaname. Come on in," he returned as casually as he could, wishing somewhat exasperatedly that Kaname would look his usual implacable and confident self so that everything was back to status quo.

"Have you had your dinner?" Kaname asked politely without moving from his spot. Zero shook his head.

"Nope. I wasn't sure if you'd already eaten or not so I thought I'd wait for you," he replied with his customary frankness. Kaname's smile widened and Zero realised he had given the correct answer. Then it hit him that Kaname must have brought something with him since he could now smell a most appetising aroma wafting out from somewhere.

"Thank you. You don't have to cook anything because I brought some food," Kaname said and finally stepped aside. He watched happily as Zero's amethyst eyes widened at the sight of Akira, Kaname's uniformed driver, carrying four large boxes, all piled up on top of one another. Dangling from one hand was a cloth bag printed with the distinctive name of an exclusive winery. The bottommost box was a cardboard one with the logo of a famous pizza chain printed on all four sides. Zero lifted an eyebrow at this.

_So that's where the mozzarella smell is coming from._

Despite his considerable load, the driver managed a respectful bow to Zero.

"Good evening, Kiryuu-san," he chirped with a wide smile. "Good to see you again."

Zero was still a little taken aback by the tall stack of takeaway food but he managed a smile and a nod. He knew Kaname's driver quite well by now, a middle aged and jovial Level C vampire who considered Zero's spacious kitchen as his second home and had whiled away many happy hours entertaining Yuko and the twins or enjoying a slice of Zero's cheesecake with a cup of freshly brewed coffee.

"Put the boxes on the dining table, Akira-san," Kaname said. The driver nodded.

"Yes, Kuran-sama," he replied before stepping adroitly past Zero. The hunter blinked and swung back to Kaname.

"There's enough food there for two days, Kaname! Is someone else coming or are you expecting a blizzard to hit the school?"

Kaname shook his head and stepped forward, filling his lungs with Zero's familiar, soft scent and feeling his heart surge with longing.

"No one else, Zero. I just wasn't sure what you felt like eating," he said with another breathtaking smile. He had his overnight bag with him but had left his work briefcase back at his apartment. Kaname had no intention of even thinking about its contents until after this weekend. In fact, he had no intention of stepping outside the school grounds until Sunday night itself unless Zero had a mind to take him out for dinner in town. Otherwise, Kaname was quite content to spend the next forty eight hours holed up in the Chairman's quarters with his beloved hunter. He didn't need anything or anyone else.

Zero hunched a shoulder when he saw how expectantly Kaname looking at him. Damn, the pureblood smelled even better up close. He looked squeaky clean too. A random thought flitted through Zero's brain - perhaps the pureblood thought he wouldn't be bitten if he hadn't showered? Zero mentally scoffed at that.

"Well, let's eat first, shall we?" he suggested a little awkwardly. "Don't want all that food to get cold," he added. Kaname nodded. He knew it would be too much to hope that Zero would drag him through the door and pin him against the wall for whatever reason.

"Good idea," he replied smoothly and turned to acknowledge Akira who was standing silently nearby.

"I'll be here on Sunday night to pick you up, Kuran-sama?" he asked. Kaname nodded in reply, his traitorous eyes again sliding to his beloved hunter.

"Good night then and have a good weekend. You too, Kiryuu-san."

For some reason, Akira's polite and utterly innocent words sent a flood of colour into Zero's cheeks. He looked away and scowled, missing the older man's sudden look of consternation, thinking he had said something wrong. He had extended his sincere condolences to Zero and his family a month back and he, too, missed the gentle mistress of the Kiryuu household who always treated him like a trusted member of the family. Perhaps he shouldn't have wished her grieving husband a good weekend, then?

Kaname shook his head in silent reassurance and indicated with a tilt of his head that Akira should leave. The driver nodded and complied but couldn't help sending another worried look over his shoulder at the silent hunter as he let himself out the door. Kaname found himself smiling faintly. Everyone who knew Zero - truly knew him - couldn't help but love him. It was already obvious his driver and group of loyal nobles were no different.

Kaname himself wasn't too worried about that scowl. He was determined to have an absolutely wonderful weekend even if all Zero did was bite him and then ignore him. With another little sigh of anticipation, Kaname turned around but Zero had disappeared and there were faint sounds of crockery and cutlery coming from the direction of the kitchen. The pureblood shrugged and decided to make himself useful by opening one of the wine bottles.

- o -

"Ahh, that was good!"

Zero licked his fingers clean and leaned back in his chair, sighing in satisfaction. He lazily rubbed his full stomach with his clean hand. It had never occurred to him to pair triple cheese pizza with red wine but he had to admit the combination was unexpectedly delicious. Perhaps it was the vintage that made all the difference. He and Kaname could only manage one of the steaks, as tender as the meat was. For some reason, Zero had felt like eating pizza and after that, he only had room for half a steak and a helping of the crisp Caesar salad.

Kaname watched him quietly, wiping his long elegant fingers on one of the paper towels. He had long since grown used to the mismatched plates and lack of linen napkins in the Kiryuu household. In fact, he had even eaten a slice of the cheesy, greasy pizza with his fingers. It was something he only did in Cross Academy though.

Zero sensed Kaname's gaze on him and looked up. He raised an eyebrow in question.

"Did you already have something earlier, Kaname? You hardly ate anything."

Kaname blinked. A generous slice of pizza, two bite sized pieces of steak, a spoonful of salad and two glasses of wine surely couldn't be called 'hardly anything', could it? He raised an eyebrow at Zero in turn.

"I ate a lot, Zero," he reassured the hunter but the thoughtful amethyst gaze remained on him.

"You sure?" their owner asked sceptically. "You ate even less than usual and that's saying something."

Zero often teased the pureblood about how he seemed to be on a perpetual diet all the time and accused him of being too used to fine food to find his cooking palatable, something that Kaname would immediately veto, assuring Zero that his food was delicious and inevitably taking second helpings to appease the hunter and Yuuki.

Now, Kaname almost squirmed under Zero's questioning gaze. He had indeed eaten less than usual but that was only due to the excited butterflies taking up precious room in his stomach. He was so looking forward to having Zero bite him that he couldn't possibly concentrate on something as mundane as food despite the world class steaks, world renowned pizza and very expensive wine. Kaname knew that the only reason he still looked reasonably composed now was because of the very tight rein he was keeping on his emotions. Otherwise, he might very well have mortified them both by throwing up his dinner all over the table.

Zero finally shrugged and stood up, suppressing a groan as his stomach protested its unusually heavy load. He hadn't eaten this much since... well, since Yuuki was diagnosed with cancer actually. Zero frowned as he suddenly realised how long ago it seemed. Was it only a matter of months since his world fell apart?

_No. Don't think of that. Not now. _

"Well, let's get all this cleaned up, shall we?" he remarked abruptly, reaching for Kaname's plate and stacking it on top of his own. Kaname stood up as well, quelling the sudden excitement spiking through him. He reached for the wine glasses, noting the faint tremble in his fingers.

_Soon. Soon._

- o -

Soon was exactly fifteen minutes later. Zero only needed ten to clear the dining table and wash the dishes since he didn't do any cooking. Kaname had wanted to assist but Zero waved him away and said he would appreciate a hot cup of tea after all that pizza. Kaname didn't protest but obediently turned towards the kettle - obviously, he wasn't to be trusted with the dishes. He couldn't help wondering if perhaps Zero thought him as clumsy as how Yuuki used to be. The thought made Kaname smile even as it twisted a familiar pang in his heart. He turned to look around the familiar kitchen and saw that nothing had changed.

Yuuki's pink heart shaped porcelain mug that Kaname had more than once heard Yuko complain about how hard it was to clean was still placed next to the other mugs on the shelf. The large, dented baking pan that made its appearance on the dining table during special occasions with a stuffed roast turkey, black pepper chicken or orange duck sitting in it was still on the topmost shelf. There was obviously a story in how the pan got dented, since Kaname had seen Yuuki and Zero direct a laughing glance at Cross in the past who would respond with a sheepish smile and a shrug. Kaname still harboured hope that he would get to hear the story one day. But for now, he reached for the canister of tea bags.

A comfortable silence fell in the kitchen as Kaname made the tea while Zero efficiently washed and dried the dishes. In a matter of minutes, he was wiping his hands dry on a towel. When he turned around, Kaname was already sitting at the wooden table with two steaming mugs in front of him.

"Thanks," Zero gave the pureblood a small smile as he walked over and reached for his mug. It struck Kaname then that while there may not be reciprocal love between them right now, there was at least honest trust and respect, two other qualities that a healthy relationship - whether between friends or lovers - would need to survive. After all, how many vampire hunters would willingly turn their backs on a pureblood for even a second let alone for so many minutes? And how many purebloods would quietly obey a hunter's order to make drinks for them instead of taking it as a personal insult?

Zero blew the steam off his tea and took a sip, confident in the fact that Kaname knew exactly how he liked his tea. Zero liked the familiarity it implied. Everything was status quo. Expected. Anticipated. It was only Kaname's craving for his bite that threw everything right off. And speaking of that craving... Zero found himself studying the slender, dark haired pureblood sitting in front of him. There was a tenseness about those slender shoulders that said something was off. Or perhaps it was the way Kaname was worrying his lower lip with those white teeth that indicated he was preoccupied with something. Zero blinked when he realised he was staring very intently at Kaname's mouth. That pair of lips had pressed a soft kiss on his cheek exactly five nights ago and Zero hadn't been able to forget about that moment ever since.

"Kaname, are you thinking about - you know... my bite?" he asked suddenly. Kaname's head snapped up. He had been studying his mug, wondering if he dared to remind Zero of his promise or simply wait until the hunter brought it up himself when the problem was taken right out of his hands. He met Zero's questioning look head on and nodded mutely.

_I haven't been able to think of anything else, actually..._

Zero sighed. Well, no time like the present, right? It was time to bite the bullet, so to speak. Only it wasn't a hard shiny bullet he would soon be sinking his fangs into but a soft, tender... Again, Zero's fangs gave an excited throb at the thought.

"All right, come on then. Let's go to the study," he offered, hoping he didn't sound too eager and trying not to notice how Kaname's eyes lit up at his words.

The study was where most of their taboo sessions took place. The Headmistress used this room as her office during the day but it was vacant at night since she didn't live on the school grounds. It was pretty much the only room that afforded Kaname and Zero their much needed privacy. With his heart beating excitedly once more, Kaname followed Zero down the hall. The hunter ushered him in first before he followed. Even though there was no one else around, Zero still locked the door as a matter of habit. When he turned around, Kaname was standing beside the sofa.

The last time they had been in this room, Zero had bitten him after the pureblood had all but forced him to. This time though, there was no denial in the hunter's amethyst eyes as he walked towards his waiting brother-in-law. Kaname willed his hands to be steady as he started unbuttoning his shirt. The slow but deliberate way Zero was advancing towards him reminded him of a hunter stalking its prey. Kaname swallowed at how true that phrase was. He was Zero's prey after all, but a most willing one. His heart beat faster as his shaking fingertips pushed the last button through its hole. His shirt hung open, exposing his pale chest that was rising and falling more rapidly now.

Zero's gaze fell to Kaname's waist and travelled upwards, staring at his chest and throat almost greedily. When he reached the pureblood's eyes, Kaname's throat went dry. Zero's eyes were crimson toned and twin ivory points showed between those parted lips. He took one more step and then he was directly in front of Kaname who almost stopped breathing. Zero inhaled slowly, pulling the pureblood's scent deep into his lungs. It was a soft and alluring scent that somehow made his heart ache. Damn, did Kaname have to smell _this _good, this unbelievably sweet? He saw the pale slender throat work as the pureblood swallowed.

"Zero," Kaname murmured. "Bite me, please."

_I can't stand it a moment longer..._

Zero nodded. He wanted to believe he was just keeping his promise but he wanted to bite Kaname. God help him, he wanted to. He raised his hands and rested them lightly on Kaname's shoulders, feeling the tense muscles beneath his palms and absently stroking them with his fingers. The dark chocolate gaze was fixed on his face with a haunting mixture of want and desperation.

"Please," Kaname whispered. His blood was humming madly through his veins now, begging to be drawn. He licked his dry lips and exhaled softly, his warm sweet breath brushing the hunter's face.

"Hush," Zero whispered absently. In his mind, Kaname was getting himself all worked up over nothing more exciting than an ordinary bite. But still... there was something incredibly flattering about the pureblood's open longing. Zero's gaze fell again and this time, it focused on the vein pulsing madly under that pale, perfect skin. Instinctively, Kaname tilted his head to the left, eyes sliding shut as his heart continued to hammer hard inside his chest.

_Now. Please now..._

Zero took a half step forward, pressing his chest lightly against Kaname's. He fitted his face into the familiar crook of that tender, exposed neck and inhaled again. Slowly. Deeply. Yuuki had smelled sweet, very sweet and he adored her flowery scent but Kaname... ah, Kaname smelled both exquisitely sweet _and _wonderfully intoxicating at the same time. It was impossible of course - how could anyone smell better than Yuuki? But when it came to Kaname, nothing seemed impossible. After all, he already gave his precious blood freely and repeatedly to a vampire hunter - what could be more impossible than that?

So if the impossible... was possible... then perhaps Zero could be forgiven if he allowed himself – just for once - to enjoy this impossible privilege given to him and only him. Couldn't he? After all, he thought distractedly, there were times too many to count when he had sunk his fangs into this waiting neck without so much as a prepatory lick. Of course, he had been in pain and bleeding from Level E injuries during most of those times and suffering from blood lust as well but still... it hardly seemed the right etiquette especially in light of who his benefactor was. Zero wasn't aware that he was reasoning with himself, that he perhaps needed to make up for those sessions somehow even if Kaname never complained... or at least take the time to enjoy this one, if nothing else.

With a reverence he seldom showed to the pureblood, Zero licked Kaname's neck, passing his tongue slowly and languidly over that silky skin, tasting the sweetness he had come to expect. He did it again and again, ignoring how his heart was starting to pound in sweet, sweet anticipation of where this was leading to. Kaname shuddered at the unexpected ministrations, his skin breaking out in goose bumps and his breath coming out unevenly past his lips. Automatically, his arms came up, trembling hands sliding up Zero's toned arms in a need to touch the hunter's solid warmth and to seek support for his shaky legs at the same time.

The mere thought that he would very soon be claiming Kaname's neck made Zero's jaw ache fiercely. He really should prepare Kaname a little more... but no, it was enough. Enough preparation for now. With the characteristic suddenness Kaname had come to crave and adore, Zero's control finally broke. He drove his fangs deep into that waiting neck and claimed it as his own once again, making its owner gasp sharply with delight.

For the next few moments, Zero was completely lost in the taste, texture and feel of Kaname's blood. He didn't drink greedily but he took large mouthfuls and savoured each one in his mouth before he swallowed, as if he were imbibing a wine that was infinitely more precious than the one he had taken at dinner. Each draught of this precious, precious liquid brought the same bright burst of energy that made his heart pound and his every nerve end tingle in joyful awareness. His fingers tightened instinctively onto Kaname's shoulders and he pulled the pureblood closer to him. Kaname allowed it willingly, his hands sliding around to Zero's back as he pressed his face into the hunter's muscled shoulder, struggling to keep silent as his entire body trembled and rejoiced in the sheer delight of being needed by his beloved hunter.

_As much as you want, Zero. Take as much as you want._

- Chapter End -


	13. Chapter 13: The Request

**Author Notes: **Hello again, everyone! Thank you once more for your lovely reviews. Sorry to keep you waiting but I've had a madly busy end of month time. Anyway, here is the next chapter and again, hope you enjoy it :)

**Appreciation:** If there's any part of the blood drinking that reminds you of **Blackened Wing**'s fabulous stories, it's because I am still inspired by her. Otherwise, this chapter would've been finished in less than 500 words!

- Chapter Start -

Over thirty years had passed since that fateful evening but Kaname could still recall it as clearly as if it had happened only last week. He particularly remembered the emotions that had run through him then - his surprise during class changeover when he noticed that neither of the two School Prefects were waiting outside the Moon Dorm Gates to keep the Day Class girls in check... his consternation when he leaned that Zero was once again suffering from a blood lust attack... his growing fear for Yuuki when he next learned that she had gone after Zero... his profound relief when he found Yuuki unharmed in that empty classroom... his reluctant admiration when he saw that Zero was still trying to push her away despite his obvious suffering... his respect and even awe when he realised it meant that Zero truly loved Yuuki more than life itself. All of these hit Kaname one after another but it was the total combination of all of them, witnessed with his own eyes, that sealed the decision he had been mulling over for the past couple of weeks.

Kaname decided right there and then that he would feed Zero his blood not once, but regularly and indefinitely to stop his descent into madness and stabilise his condition once and for all. It would of course save Zero's life but Kaname never suspected it would change his own as well. Even though he admired Zero's tenacity, will and sheer stubbornness, his decision was made for Yuuki's sake alone. Over the years though, Kaname was very thankful for another reason. Pressed close to Zero and feeling like the most wonderfully needed and important person to him right now, Kaname closed his eyes and breathed a heartfelt prayer of gratitude for his decision that evening so many years ago. It had caused him countless sleepless nights and endless hours of hopeless longing... but throughout the years of loneliness and pain, he was still thankful, thankful that Zero was alive, that his condition was stable and that he was now... available.

Zero was thankful too. He always was when he got to drink Kaname's blood, knowing what an honour it was. But this session was _different_, somehow. Not only because he now knew how his donor felt but because of the reason why he was feeding from him now. For so many years, Zero had bitten Kaname solely to heal from injuries or to keep his condition stable. During the former sessions, he was bleeding, in severe pain and could only think of slaking his blood lust as fast as possible. During the latter sessions, he was often conscious of his family members just a few feet away with only a locked door separating them and hence did his best to keep the feedings short and impersonal. He kept his feedings even shorter when Yuuki chose to be present, the only witness her husband and brother allowed. It always felt a bit strange for Zero to bite someone else in Yuuki's presence even though she maintained she enjoyed seeing how close her husband and brother had become.

But this time... was different.

Zero was biting Kaname not to heal himself or to quench his blood lust but to keep a promise that he knew would give the pureblood pleasure. There was no pain wracking his body and no blood lust to contend with. There was no one outside the door to distract him and no one waiting for them to be done either. There was just him and a helpless, trembling, soft skinned creature in his arms. There was all the time in the world for Zero to focus on the very pleasurable task he was currently engaged in. There was even time to indulge his curiosity about a recently acquired knowledge, and to perhaps even... put it to the test a little. Just a bit of experiment, really, nothing more than that.

If Zero had taken a moment to actually think about the meandering direction his mind was heading, he would have flushed bright red and quashed his impulse on the spot. Unfortunately for him and fortunately for Kaname, the two glasses of wine Zero had drunk at dinner earlier made him feel that that it was entirely rational to seek some proof that what Kaname had shocked him with last week was real. For what was probably the first time in his life, Zero deliberately used his tongue as he drank. Usually, he merely utilised his fangs while he drank and his tongue came into play to clean Kaname's neck only after he had finished. But now, Zero experimented a little. He started off by tentatively licking the skin near the puncture wounds he had made. He guessed somewhat hazily that Kaname would enjoy that even if he wasn't really aware that puncturing the skin would render it extra sensitive, what more for a pureblood who had been bitten repeatedly by the same pair of fangs and at roughly the same spot.

"Unhh...!" Kaname's knees shook at the unexpected bone melting caress. He sagged even more completely against the hunter, long fingers clutching desperately in the back of Zero's soft T-shirt to keep himself from falling into a quivering heap at the hunter's feet. His whole world had been centered solely on the sensation of those familiar fangs in his flesh, on that beloved scent surrounding him, on that strong, steady heartbeat against his own and on that hard, muscled body he was pressed up against but oh God, that tongue...! That naughty, _wicked_, wonderful tongue!

Zero instinctively braced his back to take more of Kaname's weight, which wasn't at all too much for him. He tried again, giving the pureblood's neck another slow and languid lick. He was rewarded with another shudder and another breathless moan. Heartily encouraged, Zero swallowed the delicious nectar in his mouth and teased Kaname's neck again and again, his lips unconsciously moving against the same area at the same time as he slowly gathered another mouthful of blood. The delicious shudders that rippled non-stop though the pureblood and the even softer, drawn out moans that followed were immensely gratifying. So gratifying in fact that Zero even smiled to himself.

_Interesting. Oh, this is _very _interesting. _

It was only meant to be a short test but Zero found he didn't want end his experiment anytime soon, not with the lovely responses he was getting. Leaving his fangs buried in Kaname's neck, he swept his tongue over the damp, sensitised skin again and again, making the pureblood shiver helplessly each time as his knees buckled further.

"Ze-Zero...!" Kaname gasped breathlessly at last. He didn't know if he could stand anymore of this. His legs were shaking so much, he was on the verge of falling despite his tight grip on the hunter's shirt. That softly gasped entreaty reached Zero's ears and he paused. Slowly and almost sensuously, he slid his fangs free, earning another delicious shiver from the oh so wonderful smelling creature in his arms. The rich powerful pure blood was setting Zero's blood tingling and making him feel alive, vibrant and powerful but conversely, it was blurring his mental faculties. It seemed unimportant right now to remember that this trembling person clinging to him so desperately was someone with untold power and command, someone who could take control of your body and your mind, someone who could kill you with nothing more than a single thought... or worse, order you to kill yourself.

All that mattered right now to Zero was that he had the power to render such a beautiful creature undone. He felt empowered. Triumphant. Gratified. Right this very minute, it didn't seem to matter much that that creature was a vampire, a pureblood, his brother-in-law and above all, a male. No, none of that mattered at all. Not right now.

"Hmm, you liked that, huh?" Zero finally murmured, his voice husky with the heady warmth of his donor's blood. Kaname lifted his head a little to peep up at him and his heart leapt at the small, mischievous smile that tilted Zero's crimson stained lips.

"Uhm..." Through the thick fog clouding his brain, Kaname debated whether to say yes or no but belatedly realised that his hesitation was answer enough when Zero's low, amused chuckle sounded. The pureblood blushed and squirmed a little in embarrassment. He didn't just like that, he loved that! He also wanted Zero to continue drinking from him and not _ever _stop, to hell with the consequences! As if hearing that silent wish, Zero obligingly fitted his mouth to that bite area again but found to his consternation that the puncture wounds had already closed - such was a pureblood's healing speed.

_Oops._

"Sorry," Zero muttered before sinking his fangs into Kaname's neck again.

"Unhh!" Kaname groaned softly as he pressed hard against Zero, almost sending the hunter stumbling back before he regained his balance. The feel of Zero's fangs penetrating him again was a sensation that was one half pleasure, one half pain and so wonderful Kaname's body almost spasmed in response. Zero resumed drinking again but this time, he drew the pure blood in equally appreciative but very carefully measured mouthfuls. He didn't want to drain Kaname and he didn't need anymore. He just wanted to prolong this session, which was turning out to be far less intimidating than he had feared and a lot more fun instead. Kaname's responses were just too darned appealing and amusing. A small part of Zero's mind tried to remind him that this was probably because the pureblood wasn't making any attempt to hide his responses this time and that should mean something else was likely to happen... but Zero didn't really hear that.

Panting softly, Kaname's head lolled a little more to the left. He felt shaky, lightheaded and aroused all at the same time, a good part of the remaining blood in his veins having flowed downwards to pool thickly in a certain area. Kaname distantly realised that this wasn't a good thing in light of how skittish Zero had been but before he could force his shaky limbs to move away, it was too late. He was pressed so close to the hunter from chest to hip that Zero couldn't help noticing the slow but insistent throbbing against his inner thigh. It didn't come from him. At least, he was pretty sure it didn't. Not yet, anyway. With a gasp of shock, Zero yanked his fangs out abruptly, ignoring the small gasp of shock coming from Kaname.

"What the - !"

Zero gripped Kaname's shoulders and pushed him firmly backwards, automatically supporting him at the same time. He looked down and felt as if a bucket of cold water had been dumped on his head. There was no mistaking the sudden bulge in the front of those close fitting linen pants that hadn't been there before. Zero's head jerked up again and his wide, crimson toned eyes met Kaname's guilty looking ones accusingly. A long moment of silence crawled by, broken only by their somewhat uneven breathing. It was Kaname who broke eye contact first, his gaze dropping to Zero's blood stained mouth and chin. He stared at the arousing sight as if his very life was at stake, willing his legs to hold his weight at the same time.

_I should have known he wouldn't like that._

"Geez, Kaname," Zero muttered at length. He suspected he was blushing, judging from the heat he could feel pulsing in his cheeks. "You weren't kidding when you said you'd get aro- uhm... affected, huh?"

Kaname shook his head silently, still staring intently at Zero's lips. It was nothing to be embarrassed about, he told himself stubbornly, despite how hot his face felt. He had already explained it all to Zero, hadn't he? So what if the hunter's response wasn't very reassuring? It was only to be expected, wasn't it? Kaname kept silent. He had a feeling Zero wasn't likely to accept whatever he said now. Zero realised belatedly that he was still holding onto the pureblood's shoulders and started to let go but Kaname's face came up and his slender fingers clamped onto the other's wrists urgently.

"No - don't stop," he implored huskily.

Zero's gaze skidded away. His behaviour mortified him and he felt like he had only narrowly escaped making a fool of himself. What the hell had he been thinking? That it would be fun to experiment? Why on earth should he think that? Hadn't he been shocked speechless just a few days ago when Kaname admitted that he had deliberately caused his injuries in those missions so that Zero would need his blood? Hadn't he been just as shocked when told that Kaname craved his bite and found it arousing? Hadn't Zero promised himself that whatever emotions that inadvertently arose within the two of them would be dealt with in private and most importantly, separately? How on earth could he have forgotten all of these and in less than a week's time?

Zero shook his head, utterly disgusted with himself.

"OK, that's it. I've had enough," he said shortly, trying to tug his hands free at the same time. The frown on his face and the thin line of his lips spoke volumes. Kaname's heart screamed in protest. It was obvious that Zero regretted his earlier light hearted teasing but Kaname couldn't let it go... not when the hunter had given every indication that he was enjoying himself fully and not when Kaname had finally felt like he was being rewarded for his patience. He had thrilled to every moment that bite and never wanted it to end.

"No!" he protested again, too agitated to weigh his words. "Please, Zero - I've waited five days for this! Don't stop now! You can't!"

Zero only glared furiously at him and shook Kaname's grip off, flinging his hands off the pureblood's shoulders at the same time.

"Why the hell not!" he very nearly snarled back, crimson eyes glinting dangerously. Light hearted teasing had swung to blind anger - that was the trouble with Kaname's blood; it whipped up one's emotions so easily that lust could morph to fury in an instant. Kaname opened his mouth and closed it again, torn by frustration in wanting to say what was on the tip of his tongue and knowing that it couldn't be said. Not now. Not when Zero was in this mood.

"Because I still want you bite me, Zero," Kaname muttered at last. "So... don't stop now."

Perhaps it was the slightly sullen tone of his voice or perhaps it was because he hadn't said 'please' but Zero's eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Don't tell me what I can or cannot do, Kaname," he warned in a low growl, his mind balking at what it perceived was a direct order from a pureblood. If he could think about this rationally, Zero would remember that Kaname had never really ordered him to do anything but he was still reeling from how much he had enjoyed teasing the pureblood just moments ago.

"No! I meant, I just wanted-" Kaname kept his voice reasonably soft but Zero shook his head adamantly, folding his arms defensively across his chest. He ignored the dejected slant to Kaname's shoulders and hardened his heart stubbornly. He had promised to bite the pureblood but he hadn't promised anything else and he sure as hell hadn't promised to be extra polite about it!

"Nope. Enough is enough, Kaname," he stated tersely. He looked and sounded angry and immovable but inside, he was more confused than anything else. It wasn't really because of Kaname's reaction since Zero already knew about that. Granted, he still thought it a little weird but it was his own reaction that was making him so uneasy now. Zero realised he had enjoyed biting Kaname so much that it wouldn't take much more to make him feel the same way the pureblood did - sexually aroused and in his presence as well. No. It was utterly unthinkable and Zero exploded again, the words tumbling from his mouth before he could stop them.

"Damnit, Kaname, I've bitten you like you asked me to! I've kept my promise and you've had your fun! What more do you want from me? Geez!"

_Fun?_

Kaname froze as his mind latched onto that one totally unexpected word. His eyes went wide and his mouth fell open in utter shock. Oh God, what had Zero said? Fun? What did he mean by that? After a second, Kaname snapped his mouth shut. He swung about about and walked swiftly towards the desk, stopping beside it. Breathing deeply, he ducked his head, hands also clenched into tight, shaking fists by his sides. For a tense half minute or so, innate pureblood pride and anger fought a fierce battle with love and hurt inside him, making several things on the desk and around the room rattle. Kaname felt as if he couldn't breathe, couldn't think. Zero's words had stabbed right at his heart and at a moment when they were least expected. He just wasn't prepared for them.

"Had my... fun?" he repeated numbly. Dear God, did Zero think him so frivolous that he was just - just enjoying himself? No doubt he was but each time Kaname asked Zero to bite him, he also left himself wide open and felt mentally and emotionally vulnerable. It was a situation no pureblood should ever find themselves in, especially in front of a hunter and yet Kaname allowed it each time. Because he trusted Zero... and loved him... and wanted him...

Kaname swallowed painfully, his throat and chest swelling up with a hurt too deep to put into words. Each time he thought Zero couldn't possibly verbally wound him anymore, he was wrong. Did Zero think that this was just a - a sort of game to him, the one thing that could literally bring him to his knees?

Zero had involuntarily taken a step towards Kaname but froze as the pureblood's aura swelled almost painfully in his senses. His hunter instincts kicked in instinctively, warning him to stay away from the emotional pureblood.

"Kaname?" he asked instead, hating the uncertainty that coloured his voice. It was not so much from fearing Kaname but from the dawning realisation that he had spoken more harshly than he had meant to. Kaname heard the hesitation in Zero's voice. He wasn't sure if the hunter regretted what he had said or was merely afraid of him now but it was what he needed to pull himself together. Kaname took a deep breath and then another, forcing the storm of emotions inside him to calm down. Giving into his anger wouldn't do either of them any good. It wasn't the first time Kaname had had to do that... ignore his own hurt and think of others but he did it again. Taking slow, deep breaths, focusing on compressing all the anger and the hurt inside him into a ball that he made as small and tight as he could. He pushed it to the back of his mind. Slowly, the almost tangible waves of power in the room receded, leaving behind an expectant silence.

"I'm fine," Kaname finally murmured after he was sure he had gotten his voice under control. His throat felt raw.

_Yeah and pigs could fly. Sure they could._

Somehow, Zero knew Kaname would say that. He exhaled in frustration, dragging his hands through his hair. He had gone too far. Again. He had shouted at Kaname when it was he who had promised to bite him and when it was he who had started teasing the pureblood. A twinge of regret pricked sharply at Zero's conscience. He couldn't see Kaname's face now but his posture was similar to that of a child who had been slapped without knowing what he did wrong.

"Look," Zero reined in his temper with difficulty and tried to speak calmly. "We're supposed to deal with our... ah, feelings by ourselves and not drag each other into it, right? I thought we'd already agreed on that!"

He exhaled again and Kaname peeped over his shoulder cautiously. Zero was now looking at the floor with his hands on his hips, shaking his head. Kaname waited uncertainly, biting his lip. Pureblood protocol demanded that he gutted Zero for this... or flung him into the nearest wall... or at the very least shook him until his fangs fell out but really, what was the point? It was he who had deliberately caused Zero to be injured many times in the past when it hadn't even been his fault in the first place, just so that Zero would need his blood. How could Kaname even think of hurting the hunter now despite what he had said? It wasn't his fault that his regal pureblood brother-in-law turned into a quivering mess of jelly each time Zero's fangs came anywhere near his neck.

Kaname wasn't the only busy chastising himself. Zero's shoulders sagged as guilt followed regret and both gnawed ceaselessly at his conscience. He felt like crap. What on earth had made him blow up at Kaname like that? It wasn't the pureblood's fault he was affected by his bite when he had so generously given of his blood for so many years now. Zero looked up and saw the hurting look on Kaname's face before the pureblood quickly turned away. It made Zero feel a thousand times worse. He hadn't meant for his words to have come out quite _that _way. Yes, Kaname had obviously enjoyed being bitten going by those ecstatic moans and all but it wasn't strictly in that 'fun' sort of sense. And Zero _had _taken enough already but he wanted more... he would always want more and - and - oh, what the hell!

"Look, I'm sorry, OK?" Zero finally admitted gruffly. Kaname turned a little but didn't look at him directly. He gave a barely audible sniff of pureblood pride and held his head high. Outwardly, he looked icily remote but inwardly... oh, he was frantically wondering if he could get away without having to blink his eyes to get rid of some very humiliating moisture that had gathered there.

He wondered why on earth had he looked forward to this weekend.

He wondered what had made him believe that Zero could ever feel a tenth of the way he did.

He wondered what an utter fool he was to have even hoped.

He... he was confused and miserable.

"Kaname, turn around."

_No, I won't._

"Kaname, please."

_I - I can't!_

"Just look at me, will you?"

_I, uhm... give me a minute._

Zero sighed at Kaname's silence, feeling guiltier than ever. Hesitantly, he walked closer and stopped behind Kaname. Taking a chance, he reached for the pureblood's nearest shoulder, finding it tense and unexpectedly fragile under his palm. For a moment, he was just thankful that Kaname didn't obliterate him on the spot but then he frowned. Kaname didn't pull away from his touch but he wouldn't look at him either. For some reason, this almost made Zero smile. There were times when his brother-in-law's behaviour reminded him of the twins when they were younger. Zero just wasn't sure why that sort of behaviour was downright annoying in his children but strangely appealing in Kaname.

"Hey, look at me," Zero requested again. His voice had taken on a cajoling, almost tender note that tugged mercilessly at Kaname's heartstrings. He stubbornly shook his head. He should get out right now while he still had a little bit of pride left. He didn't need Zero to bite him anymore. He could survive this. Hadn't he survived being alone all these years? Kaname's body tensed as he tried to force his unwilling legs to move, to carry him out the door and away from Zero.

"Kaname, come on. Turn around now. Please," Zero's voice softened even more and Kaname gulped. He blinked rapidly, cursing his useless legs that didn't want him to go anywhere except right into Zero's arms. He finally took a deep breath and looked over his shoulder. Zero's eyes were now twin pools of solemn amethyst filled with remorse, his anger having vanished as suddenly as it appeared. He tugged more insistently at Kaname's shoulder and the pureblood finally allowed himself to be pulled around, his eyes again doggedly fixed on the hunter's bloodstained lips and chin. Zero licked his lips self consciously, his free hand digging into his jeans pocket for a clean handkerchief.

"Look, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that," Zero apologized more steadily this time as he wiped his mouth and chin clean, looking Kaname straight in the eye. "It's not your fault you ah... feel that way."

It still felt a little awkward to mention that but Kaname simply stared back at Zero. After a few moments, he nodded. He appreciated Zero's honesty. He knew it wasn't easy to apologise. Kaname swallowed once more and found that he could forgive Zero anything... even tearing out his heart with unintentionally cruel words.

"It's OK," he finally whispered, not trusting his words to go above that.

Was it? Zero didn't think so but there was it again - Kaname's graciousness. Zero nodded in turn, not knowing what to say. He started to turn around but Kaname took a step towards him.

"But what I said stands, Zero. I - I want you to take more."

Zero sighed with a mix of exasperation and resignation. He somehow knew Kaname would insist on that - what was that again about giving a pureblood an inch? But in the light of what just happened, it seemed churlish and even a little ridiculous to refuse what every other vampire would consider a great honour and privilege. Zero was aware that Kaname was making himself very vulnerable with that just that statement and he still felt guilty about having shouted at him earlier. There was a sheen in those expressive brown eyes that Zero didn't want to decipher and there was a strange longing in his heart to obey Kaname that he didn't want to understand. He felt uneasy about the whole thing and compounding it was the simple fact that he hadn't wanted to stop either. Oh, why was such a simple act of drinking blood turning out to be so complicated?

"Are you sure?" Zero finally asked, his eyebrows knitting in concern. "You're only going to make it worse, you know."

There was no need to explain what 'worse' was.

"I'm sure," Kaname agreed quickly, following it up with a nod of his head. Zero shook his head reply, a rueful smile tilting his lips despite himself. Kaname stared at it, mesmerized. He was starting to hope again and there was no use telling his traitorous heart not to. It simply wouldn't listen to him anymore. Zero on the other hand was wondering absently to himself if he would one day laugh about all this. Yuuki would have laughed already if she were here, he was sure of it. She had always told him that he was reading too much into things and should take them at face value more often. Zero took a deep breath and ignored the by now familiar ache in his heart. He made up his mind that this was probably one of those times.

"All right. Just a bit more and that's it," he said firmly, his tone brooking no argument. It was a tone his three children were very familiar with but it looked like Kaname-Oji-san wasn't. Or had never paid it much heed.

"For tonight, you mean?" he asked, his eyes starting to sparkle with renewed hope.

"What?" Zero looked startled. "No! I meant for this whole weekend!"

"No. For tonight only, Zero."

The hunter scowled in reply but Kaname could be stubborn when he wanted to be. He hadn't waited five days, packed his overnight bag and come all the way here for just one feeding session. It was out of the question!

"Why are we even having this conversation?" Zero mumbled half to himself. He glanced at Kaname who shrugged as if to say 'hey, you're the one who started it'. Zero tried to glare at him but unforgivably, his mouth started to quirk again. He placed his hands on his hips and shook his head, looking chagrined.

"You know, if anyone could hear us now, Kaname, they'd think us both mad," he finally remarked. The pureblood hesitated before allowing himself a cautious shrug.

"Perhaps," he murmured. It wasn't as if he cared too much about it. Zero gave a martyred sounding sigh.

"All right but don't blame me if you pass out on the floor," he finally warned, not knowing what else to say. He had given up and knew that Kaname knew it too judging by the happy smile he sent Zero.

"I won't," the pureblood promised a little too quickly. Zero rolled his eyes a little.

"Fine. If that happens, I'll just leave you on the floor then."

Of course Zero wouldn't do that. There was a sofa just a couple of feet away but he thought it prudent to give the happy looking pureblood a final warning. Just in case. Zero wasn't quite sure what the just in case was for. Kaname only shrugged in that same careless manner and with another sigh, Zero took a step closer. Kaname tensed expectantly, his heart going into overdrive again. This time though, Zero stopped about a foot away. When he bent forward at the waist, Kaname finally realised that this was as close as Zero was going to get and that he meant to put some space between them this time. The pureblood's heart rebelled at this.

_No! This was not how it was supposed to be!_

Kaname's body had already cooled down. There would not be any physical evidence to embarrass Zero this time so there was no reason for him to stand so far away. Kaname took a quick step backwards and Zero straightened up with a frown when he found his target unexpectedly moving further away.

"Do you want me to bite you or not?" he asked, sounding confused. Kaname bit his lip.

"I do," he replied honestly. "But I - I want you to hold me at the same time."

There. He had finally said it, to hell with how pathetically dependent it sounded. Of course, he had already said it before, in the hotel room where Zero had bit him almost a week ago but this was different. Zero knew how he felt now, would he perhaps also guess the true reason behind it? Kaname found himself torn between wanting the hunter to know... and fearing he would find out anyway.

Zero's eyes widened, fairly shocked that Kaname had actually said that out loud. He had said that before, hadn't he? Why else would the words sound so familiar? Zero stared at the very serious looking pureblood who looked so utterly and deliciously appealing with that black silk shirt hanging off his right shoulder, exposing even more of that faintly blood stained neck and pale chest. Zero shook his head hard to clear it. He was going mad again. That's it, no more gorging himself on pure blood after this, no matter how tempting it was. It did strange things to his head, messed up his thinking and made rationality and logic fly right out the window. And speaking of illogical...

"You want me to _what_? But - why?" Zero sounded bewildered. Then he recalled something and pounced on it desperately.

"Are you cold, Kaname? Is that it? Did I take too much?"

Kaname wavered. Damn Zero for making it so difficult to be honest! He was sorely tempted to use the hunter's guilt to his advantage but the last thing he wanted was to make him feel even worse right after apologising for his earlier words. He didn't want Zero's guilt or his apologies. He just wanted the hunter to think nothing of biting him and to do it as often as he wished. Hoping fervently that Zero would not reject him this time, Kaname decided to be honest... or at least at honest as he felt Zero would accept.

"No, Zero," he replied softly. "No, you didn't take too much and no, I'm not feeling cold."

_Just pathetically in love... and longing to feel your arms around me again._

Zero's eyebrows knitted as if once again, he had read the silent hope in Kaname's eyes. He opened his mouth to speak but Kaname gave a quick shake of his head to stop him. He gazed at the hunter, willing him to understand, willing him to accept, willing him to go along even if none of this made any sort of sense.

"Zero, you held Yuuki when you drank from her each time. I know you did," Kaname continued as steadily as he could. He was taking a risk by mentioning his sister's name but he had no choice. Zero's eyes widened. He tried to speak again but Kaname shook his head once more. He had to say it before he lost his nerve and with it, his chance of being held by his beloved hunter. He held Zero's uneasy, confused gaze with his own earnest, open one and hid nothing from him this time.

"You held Yuuki each time you took from her," Kaname repeated quietly. "So please... hold me now, Zero. It's my turn."

_It's my turn at long, long last._

- Chapter End -


	14. Chapter 14: The Understanding

**Author Notes: **Hello again! Thank you as always for your wonderful reviews, they inspire me so much! Hope you still like this very soft version of Kaname, I'm having so much fun writing him, really! _-hugs him and sees Zero trying hard not to mind- _Hope you enjoy this chapter :D

**Appreciation: **Thank you to **Schattengestalt **for reminding me of a crucial part in Hold Me, I can't believe I'd forgotten about that!

- Chapter Start -

Zero swallowed. He wanted to tell Kaname to stop messing with his head already but he didn't. The Kaname he knew would never joke about such a thing and besides... the chocolate eyes fixed upon him looked far too serious for that.

"W-what?" Zero stammered instead, his brain still insisting that he had heard wrongly. He must have. He was already more or less reconciled to the fact that Kaname craved his bite but not about wanting to be held each time he was bitten. Why would he want that? And what about those last three words - 'it's my turn'? What did they mean? It was Kaname's turn? For what? For being held the same way Zero had held his sister in the past? But why? All Zero needed to do was stick his fangs into Kaname's neck and the latter would - _should _- be happy, right? Kaname had never said anything about being held, only about being bitten. OK, so he had asked Zero to hold him in that hotel room last week but that was because... uhm, that was only because he was cold, right? But he had just said he wasn't feeling cold! So then why did he still want to be held?

Zero's head was spinning with questions that he didn't know the answers to, or perhaps he already subconsciously knew what those answers were but just didn't want to believe them.

"You want me to _what_?" he asked again, sounding and looking confused. "Why? You said you weren't cold!"

His mind had latched determinedly onto this assumption and refused to consider any other alternatives. Kaname wet his lips nervously, aware of how his action drew Zero's attention to his mouth. He gave a jerky nod.

"I'm not cold," he reassured Zero. "But I - being bitten feels good when you... hold me at the same time. I - that's all."

The halting explanation only deepened Zero's frown. Kaname braced himself for the refusal that he knew was forthcoming. Zero wouldn't fall for that explanation, it was far too simple! Besides, that wasn't all - far from it - but Kaname was too nervous to say anything else. Perhaps if he were already nestled in Zero's arms with his face happily buried in one of those broad shoulders, he might have said more but with Zero staring at him as if he had half a mind to publicly declare him mentally unhinged, that sentence was about all Kaname could manage.

"Zero, look... it doesn't matter why," he murmured softly with an earnest shake of his head. "Just hold me, that's all I ask."

_Oh, that's _all_? Geez...!_

An uneasy blush crept up Zero's face. He was on the point of refusing when a distant memory surfaced in his mind. Zero froze. There was a time many years ago when he hadn't held Yuuki while taking her blood. It was after he had confessed to the late Kaien Cross that he and Yuuki had slept in the same bed a couple of times. Their adopted father had been surprisingly understanding about it but an abashed Zero, still struggling with his body's embarrassing reactions whenever he held Yuuki close, had tried hard to keep his distance from her after that. It hadn't lasted long, of course - Yuuki's innocent and hurt reaction was enough to make Zero change his mind. The moment she shyly confessed how meaningless and cold it felt when he bit her without holding her at the same time, Zero's resolve crumbled. He had never thought her generosity or her blood meaningless in any way. He never wanted her to feel that her priceless gift was unappreciated, not even once. He treasured her heart, her body, her soul and her blood with all he had. Yuuki was very innocent then but she trusted Zero implicitly and he knew it. He willingly shouldered the responsibility of ensuring he never went too far with her. He almost did once... and the suffering he went through haunted him for months after that.

In actual truth, Yuuki found Zero's physically aroused state more amusing than anything else. She saw him only as her adopted brother then whereas Zero knew he was already in love with her. But after that thankfully brief episode, he held Yuuki close each time he drank her blood… throughout their courtship and throughout their marriage. He adored it each time and she enjoyed it too but being human, Zero knew that it was the closeness and trust she appreciated more than the sensual aspect of it.

But the person standing before him now wasn't human. He was a vampire. A _pureblood_. The very act of allowing someone to feed from him directly was a very private and intimate action even if there was only friendship or respect involved. It would doubtlessly be sensual and even more intimate if the elements of love and care were added. Therefore...

_Oh. Shit. _

Zero cursed inwardly as he finally came to the reason behind Kaname's request. The pureblood rendered himself vulnerable each time he bared his neck for Zero. Since the latter was still the only one Kaname fed, it made sense that he would want to be held by Zero at the same time simply to counteract the feelings of being vulnerable and defenseless. Giving his pure blood to one who was not his mate was strictly taboo but Kaname still did it because Zero was someone who had loved and cherished his only sister, someone whom he himself trusted and respected.

Zero's heart sank to his stomach. He wished he had understood this earlier. Honestly, he derided himself, did he have to get so uptight over every little request Kaname made? What was a mere hug or even two compared to the unlimited amount of precious, precious nectar that Kaname had given him over the years? Any other pureblood would have demanded his firstborn, his blood, body and his eternal servitude in return. At the very least.

The more he thought about it, the more Zero's heart swelled with guilt. He felt like smacking himself in the head for not coming to this conclusion earlier - it was so obvious! Besides, with the pureblood looking at him like that, Zero found the rest of his hesitation swiftly melting away into nothing. It would have taken a heart of stone to not grant that shakily voiced request and that was something Zero didn't have.

"Do I... look bad? Or smell bad?" Kaname hazarded a couple of random guesses when Zero continued to stare at him. Kaname was pretty sure that wasn't the case, though. All purebloods looked and smelled good. Besides, he had washed himself so carefully before coming here. Zero blinked and then rolled his eyes. Of all the reasons Kaname had to choose from, it would be these two utterly preposterous ones.

"Believe me, Kaname, if everyone looked or smelled even half as good as you, perfumes and cosmetics would be a thing of the past," he reassured the pureblood somewhat dryly. Kaname allowed himself a small smile at that.

"Then why won't you hold me?" he persisted.

"I didn't say I wouldn't - because it's... uh… wrong," Zero finally mumbled. Damn Kaname for asking all these awkward questions, and at the point when he was already amenable to his request!

"Wrong?" Kaname echoed with his eyebrows up, sounding genuinely surprised. "Why is it wrong?"

_How can something that feels so wonderful be wrong in any way?_

"Because! Because we're not lovers, that's why!" Zero huffed, his face flushing even hotter at having to say those words. He folded his arms across his chest and set his jaw. At times like this, Kaname could be more tenacious than a bulldog!

But there was another reason why Zero still hesitated even though the pureblood's request was getting more and more appealing by the minute.

_And because I'm lonely... but that didn't mean I should hold someone else. It isn't right._

The simple fact was that Zero was lonely and very much alone. The past month or so had made him realise this more than anything else. But so what? Everyone who lost a loved one was lonely, right? That was life… Zero was only feeling it acutely now because his children were away, picking up the threads of their own lives after having had them disrupted. That didn't mean that he should be thinking of anything or anyone else right now. Yuuki had left him less than two months ago and he was still grieving for her. He wanted to do the right thing, to respect her memory and remember his love for her. He refused to do anything that he felt might betray Yuuki's memory. So what if his arms had felt empty in bed and his pillow was often damp with tears before he was exhausted enough to fall asleep for a couple of hours? That was life. It sucked... but you just had to accept it... and go on living. You owed it to your loved ones who were still living, who still needed you.

Kaname could tell that Zero was lost in thought but he didn't know what they were or if they would end up granting his request or not.

"Zero, are you saying that only lovers have the right to hold and comfort each other?" he persisted. Zero blinked, pulled from his misery. He scowled at the question but Kaname had him there and they both knew it. The pureblood continued to hold Zero's increasingly discomfited gaze with his innocent one and Zero again felt somewhat foolish, as if he were making a big fuss about nothing. Perhaps he was because try as he might, he just couldn't come up with a single plausible reason as to why he shouldn't grant Kaname's request. Not when the outcome would comfort them both and not when he already knew Yuuki wouldn't mind if she knew. Besides, there were no witnesses to see what they were doing and Kaname would hardly blab about something so private to anyone else.

In fact, the more Zero thought about it, the more he realised he wanted to hold Kaname. It would make the pureblood happy and at the same time, help to ease the empty, hollow ache inside his own heart. Zero had hesitated mainly because he hadn't understood where Kaname was coming from earlier. Besides, a little voice in Zero's mind whispered slyly, it wasn't as if holding the pureblood was any sort of hardship, was it? He melted into Zero's arms each time as if he belonged there. The thought made Zero flush and he shifted uncomfortably. He didn't know why he was thinking such things. They weren't... right.

"Zero," Kaname murmured softly. The look of quiet confidence on his face had vanished, leaving behind a haunting wistfulness. Kaname decided that if he couldn't appeal to Zero's sense of logic, then he would appeal to his heart instead. Pride had no say in this matter. He would do just about anything to feel the hunter's warmth around him again.

"Is it so repulsive to hold me?" Kaname asked plaintively. "Do you hate it so much?"

Zero glared at him again, wondering if Kaname was being deliberately obtuse this time.

"Don't be an idiot, how can holding you feel at all repulsive?" he growled and could have bitten out his tongue at how that had come out. Kaname quickly ducked his head to hide his sudden smile.

"Actually, the way you hold me feels very good," he confessed softly, peeping up at Zero who gave an uneasy, embarrassed smile, his skin breaking out in goose bumps. He didn't think Kaname had probed his mind but once again, he had managed to read his thoughts.

"It does?" Zero mumbled. Kaname nodded solemnly. Zero gave a frustrated groan, hands clenching into fists again.

"All right! All right, you win!"

After all, there wasn't much difference between embracing someone and pressing your body close to his while you took his blood, was there?

Kaname stared at Zero, stunned. He had expected the hunter to dig in his heels for a lot longer but Zero had agreed without so much as an argument! The look of wonder on Kaname's face made Zero scowl again. He stepped forward and grabbed Kaname's shoulders, dragging the slender pureblood unceremoniously towards him. It wasn't the politically correct way for a Level D to treat a pureblood but Kaname only gave a small sob of joy as he raised his arms and locked them tightly around Zero's waist, pressing his body as close to the hunter's as he could and almost sending him stumbling backwards again, uncaring as to what Zero would think of his behaviour.

This time, Zero was extra careful when he bit down. He guessed it probably wasn't very pleasant for Kaname to be pierced so many times within the space of a few minutes. He also didn't want Kaname to actually pass out in his arms, the way Yuuki once had. That was a nightmare Zero never truly forgot. As soon as Kaname's pure blood coated his fangs, Zero's senses rejoiced in the familiar, utterly delicious taste and immediately clamoured for more. He slowly drank a couple of mouthfuls and started to withdraw his fangs. Kaname immediately pressed harder against him, silently begging him to continue. It was impossible to resist the pureblood when he pushed his neck right up against Zero's lips and murmured incoherent sounds of encouragement. Zero gave in and happily took more. He only realised he had taken a bit too much when Kaname started to sway in his arms. Zero stopped immediately and slid his fangs free, alarm bells ringing in his head.

"Unh... more..." Kaname moaned breathlessly. His head was spinning but in a delightfully muzzy way. Zero ignored him and carefully licked the wounds closed before cleaning Kaname's skin of the faint traces of the delicious blood that remained.

"No. Enough is enough, Kaname" he said firmly. The pureblood shook his head and then had to lean more heavily against Zero as the room spun again. He didn't want Zero to stop because that would mean the end of the hug too and he still hadn't gotten his fill of those strong, caring arms.

"N-no, not enough," Kaname protested breathlessly, too embarrassed to voice out what he actually wanted.

"Don't be silly!" Zero scolded, guilt threading through his voice. "You're on the verge of fainting already!"

Kaname bit his lip. He hated it when Zero felt guilty on his account but he didn't know how else to get the hunter's caring warmth.

"I know but I - uhm..." Kaname blushed and squirmed a little. A breath of warm air brushed his forehead as Zero sighed.

"Look, I'll still hold you for a while longer. That… uh, is what you're asking, isn't it?"

Kaname nodded gratefully, cheeks delicately flushed. He didn't dare look up and he didn't know whether to be pleased or embarrassed that Zero had guessed his wish so accurately. He simply burrowed his face into Zero's shoulder again, arms slipping down to curl around the hunter's waist. They stayed like that for a while more, Zero uneasily conscious of how completely Kaname was leaning against him. He couldn't reconcile this shy side of the pureblood with the side the vampire world saw. In fact, Zero couldn't believe this was the very same person whom he had known for thirty over years...

Was this honestly his regal, aristocratic, compelling brother-in-law whom all lower ranked vampires would bow to with their right hands placed reverently over their hearts whenever he entered a room? Zero had been to enough vampire functions as Kaname's supposed bodyguard to witness this sight and it never failed to slam home the fact that he was now related to someone very powerful. So how could this trembling, helpless being nestled against his chest and clinging onto him as if he feared Zero would disappear be that very same person who could command the respect and obedience of vampires with a single look? Honestly, which picture was the true Kaname Kuran?

Zero's heart and mind roiled with confusion. He could feel the slender body pressed close to his. He could hear the slightly erratic heartbeat against his own. He could trace the shallow and uneven puffs of Kaname's breath dampening a particular spot on his T-shirt. That only made the difference more startling. Zero realised he was holding Kaname as closely as how he had held Yuuki in the past. In fact, if he had just drunk her blood, they would be kissing right after Zero had licked his lips clean. The sure certainty of that made his eyes burn. It was Kaname's blood that lingered on his tongue now and not hers but the memories surfaced nonetheless. Memories of many, many loving bites, followed by just as many kisses and caresses. Memories of him loving and worshipping Yuuki with his body, bringing sweet release to both of them before falling asleep in each other's arms.

Zero almost broke down right there and then. He held Kaname even tighter as he sucked air into his lungs, desperately fighting the emotions that threatened to swamp him. There was no one to kiss anymore and no one to make love to and care for. He couldn't even imagine loving someone else after having loved and cared for the same person all these years. But right now, he was filled with an overpowering need to touch someone, to bring and draw comfort from that someone. The only person within reach was the one he was already holding in his arms. It was someone who wouldn't mind being touched by him. It was someone who in fact, _wanted _to be held by him. Zero drew deep, shuddering breaths one after another, as he fought against the inevitable. In the end, he did the only thing possible. With a shaky sigh, he surrendered to instinct and trusted that it would turn out all right.

Zero raised his head, automatically licking his lips clean. His eyes were blurring again but he ignored them and touched his mouth to Kaname's hair, savouring the caress of the silky strands against his lips. That felt good... very good. Zero breathed slowly and deeply, in and out, inhaling the fragrance of Kaname's shampoo with each breath and drawing immense comfort from the familiar, clean scent. He rubbed his cheek against the soft wavy locks in slow, almost cat-like movements, drawing pleasure from the light caresses and finding the texture of Kaname's hair so very like Yuuki's. His hands mirrored the movements, running slowly up Kaname's slender back and then down again. The pureblood was so much taller than Yuuki but they shared the same delicate bone structure, the same graceful form. The warmed silk of Kaname's shirt whispered against Zero's palms as well as Kaname's back and the pureblood shivered in pure delight at the unexpected caresses.

_Zero, that feels so, so good..._

Kaname was in paradise - enjoying, reveling and thrilling to every single moment that this sweet embrace afforded him. He didn't know why Zero was actively touching and caressing him now when he had balked earlier and he didn't care. He felt safer than he ever had even though he was weak with blood loss because he was with someone who would keep him safe from harm. He was with someone who had the power to make him the happiest person in the world.

In fact, the only thing marring the perfection of this moment was the growing throb of Kaname's fangs. It was inevitable seeing that Zero had taken a lot of his blood this time. This was the main reason why Kaname always carried his blood tablets with him. It was the only thing other than simple rest that took care of his thirst each time after he fed Zero. He had never drunk from anyone else ever since he left Cross Academy, not even Seiren. It wasn't because she or the other nobles of his inner circle hadn't offered. It was just that her blood wasn't... _his_.

Kaname knew very well that the only blood he cared to have was the one he would probably never get to taste. Zero had never fed anyone before and until very recently, had always associated a bite with pain and humiliation. There was no way he would ever feed his pureblood donor... unless it was perhaps a situation of life and death. To Kaname though, that still wasn't quite as important as gaining the hunter's love. He was tempted each time of course, seeing as Zero's neck was only a few inches away but as always, he fought down his emerging blood lust with the practiced ease of one who had denied himself the same for years. He would willingly have gone without food or water just to remain right where he was but there was something else he couldn't ignore - Zero's emotions. The raspy sounds issuing from the hunter's throat, the way his chest heaved and the unmistakable salty scent of tears eventually dragged Kaname from his stupor. He lifted his face from Zero's shoulder.

"Zero? Are you all right?" he asked softly. The concerned voice was almost too much for Zero. He shuddered again as new tears threatened to overflow.

"I miss her," he whispered raggedly. "Oh God, I miss her so damned much..."

_Yuuki._

Kaname's heart ached. He now knew why Zero was holding him so tightly. Kaname found himself caught between understanding and heartbreak. He should have known it wasn't him Zero wanted in his arms but there was nothing make believe about his grief. Kaname's arms tightened around him in an instinctive urge to offer comfort. Zero was the strongest person he knew and his tears, far from unmanning the hunter only made Kaname love him even more.

"I know," he whispered back. "I miss her too."

"I miss holding her in my arms like this," Zero whispered hoarsely. "I miss it so much. I haven't held anyone like this since... since..."

_I held you._

The resultant silence held a note of questioning awkwardness. The last time they had hugged someone was exactly five nights ago and that someone had again been each other.

"Since you held me," Kaname finished Zero's sentence in a whisper, his heart breaking with the combined weight of his grief and Zero's. His fangs had ceased to throb now. Thirst was forgotten. The only thing that mattered was Zero's grief. Kaname had waited a long, long time for his beloved hunter to be free but if it would make Zero smile again, Kaname would willingly sell his soul to bring Yuuki back. Since he couldn't, he offered the only comfort he could.

"Hold me anytime, Zero," Kaname whispered. "Anytime at all."

_You don't even have to ask. Just grab me. Anytime. Anywhere. _

This time though, Kaname's words brought only gratitude to Zero. He felt his throat swelling in response. Kaname was probably the only person who would most understand him right now. He wouldn't fault him for those tears, not when they were for the girl they both loved with all their hearts.

"...I will..."

The whisper was so soft it was barely audible but Kaname heard it. He inhaled sharply, eyes going wide in sudden joy. He wanted to say how pleased he was but his throat was too tight for words. Kaname just squeezed his eyes shut and burrowed his face in Zero's shoulder again. There was something else to be thankful about - his remembered grief at losing Yuuki had tamped down his arousal so Zero would have no cause for alarm. Kaname gave himself up completely to the hunter's warmth, shiveringly aware of each tender kiss pressed onto his hair, each shaky breath that he could feel, each drop of the warm, precious liquid that fell from those beautiful amethyst eyes. He didn't dare to caress Zero's back in return or even shift against him for fear that the embrace would end so he merely kept still and enjoyed the warmth of the hug and the feeling of being needed for as long as it lasted.

- o -

It was almost an hour later before Zero roused himself. He was dry eyed now and his arms and legs were growing numb. Kaname was still slumped against him and his weight, while not much, had succeeded in making Zero's back protest.

"Kaname," Zero murmured, giving the pureblood a little shake.

"... mmm?"

"Hey, wake up. I can't hold you like this all night. Come on, that's enough. Let's get you to your room."

Zero gave the pliant pureblood in his arms another shake. With a muffled groan, Kaname blinked his eyes open and raised his head from its very comfortable position on Zero's shoulder. That movement made his head spin again so he pressed his face to that same shoulder. He inhaled deeply, filling his lungs full of Zero's soft scent. He wanted to go to sleep dreaming of it. A quizzical smile tilted Zero's lips at Kaname's action. Yuuki had loved sniffing him too and Zero had to quickly blink away a sudden and strange image of himself as a very tasty bone, being sniffed all over by two dogs with silky brown fur.

"I think you'd better go lie down before you fall over," Zero muttered. He decided Kaname's blood was solely to blame for that very odd image as well as how clingy the pureblood was now.

"I'm fine," Kaname insisted sleepily as he took a step towards the sofa. Zero would have none of that. He took a step backwards, forcing the pureblood to take his own weight before he fell. Kaname grumbled at him and then was pleasantly surprised to find an arm sliding around his waist. He leaned gratefully into the hunter's side, nuzzling and sniffing his arm.

"Hey, cut that out," Zero protested embarrassedly but Kaname didn't seem to hear him.

"And you're going to your room. We're in the study, remember?"

Kaname pouted again. He didn't want to walk anywhere. Besides, the sofa looked very comfortable.

"I think I'll rest here first," he decided.

"Oh no, you're not," Zero vetoed immediately. He started pulling Kaname towards the door. "C'mon, I'll walk you to your room."

There was an amused and resigned note in Zero's voice as he half coaxed, half pulled the sleepy pureblood out of the study. Kaname's room was further down the hall, a few feet after the late Chairman's room. That was Zero's study cum weapons room for the past ten years. He had had to have the room double and then triple glazed after Kaname complained of the presence of hunter weapons disturbing his sleep. Kaname's room was actually part of the new extensions built to the quarters. He never had to sleep in the Moon Dorms since he left school. It wasn't a very large room and the attached bathroom was only a quarter of the size of the one in his penthouse apartment but Kaname wouldn't trade it for the world. It was proof that he belonged to this family.

Zero pushed open the door with his free hand. He found the light switch and flipped it on, bathing the room in a soft yellow glow. Zero rarely entered this room, even when Kaname was away. He didn't want to invade the pureblood's privacy which was why all their feeding sessions in Cross Academy took place in the Headmaster's study. The room was already prepared for Kaname's visit, courtesy of the Moon Dorm maids.

"Kaname? You all right?"

Kaname looked up at the concern in Zero's voice. He only realised his eyes had betrayed his thirst when he saw Zero's eyes widening in alarm. Quickly, he pulled the pureblood towards the bed.

"Shit, I've taken too much. I knew it but you just had to insist, didn't you?" Zero scolded again. Kaname quickly shook his head and then wished he hadn't when the room spun again.

"I'm fine," he insisted doggedly and wasn't surprised when Zero muttered something that sounded like "Hmmph".

"Sit down," he ordered. "I'll get your tablets."

Kaname sat on the bed obediently, watching Zero as he strode over to the dresser. There was always fresh water and blood tablets kept ready for Kaname's visit. He dropped two white tablets into a clean glass and filled it with water.

"Here." Zero was back at Kaname's side in seconds. He proffered the glass but had to help hold it when he noticed the fine trembling in Kaname's elegant hand. Thankfully, the tablets – refined and improved over the years - worked almost instantly. Kaname relaxed as the fierce throbbing in his fangs ceased a little and the dry, stabbing pain in his veins started to ease up. His body would soon do the rest.

"I'm fine," Kaname murmured again. "Zero, please don't-"

"Good. Get some rest, I'll see you later," Zero cut in somewhat awkwardly, still feeling that he shouldn't have promised Kaname he would bite him again this weekend. It was far too soon – what on earth had made him think it was all right?

The initial buzz Zero had gotten from Kaname's blood was dissipating, leaving him physically and emotionally wrung out. He didn't want to do anymore thinking or remembering. In fact, the thought of catching a few hours' sleep now sounded very good. Carefully, Zero eased his arm from Kaname's waist and the pureblood looked up immediately.

"I think I'll go take a nap too. Come on, get into bed," Zero prompted, wondering why Kaname was looking so expectantly up at him. Surely he wasn't expecting to be tucked up in bed…

"You're fussing again," Kaname said wryly but he obediently slipped off his shoes and slid his long legs under the covers. When Zero turned to go, Kaname looked up again.

"Wait."

Zero looked back at him enquiringly and Kaname gave a small, deprecating smile.

"Come closer..."

Zero's face wore a perplexed frown but he leaned down obligingly. That was all the encouragement Kaname needed. Gentle fingertips brought that beloved face closer to his and Kaname pressed a reverent kiss onto Zero's nearest cheek. He didn't use vampire speed this time but to his surprised elation, Zero didn't pull away. He even allowed the kiss and merely glared down at Kaname after it ended.

"What the hell-" he started but Kaname shook his head with another smile.

"Just a thank you," he murmured, brown eyes wide and deceptively innocent. Zero's frown deepened suspiciously.

"What for?"

"For keeping your promise," Kaname whispered as if he were imparting an important secret that no one else should hear. His heart was leaping inside his chest, thrilled that Zero hadn't slapped him or bolted from the room. In fact, he had sounded more resigned than annoyed. Could it – could it possibly mean that Zero was perhaps starting to get used to being touched by him? Kaname felt a laugh of pure happiness bubbling up in his throat and quickly swallowed it. If that was the case, he was going to touch Zero a lot more often... starting this weekend. As soon as he woke up, in fact.

"Oh. Right," Zero mumbled. So what if he had kept his promise? He was the one gorging on all that glorious pure blood, it only made sense that he should thank Kaname, right? And if that was the case, whispered that same sly voice in his mind, then he should be the one giving Kaname a -

_Whoa! _

Zero broke off his wayward thoughts, vexed with himself. He straightened up abruptly and spun around, making for the door.

"Sleep well," he threw over his shoulder before hastily letting himself out of the room and shutting the door behind him.

"You too," Kaname whispered. He had caught the brief but very promising flash of interest in Zero's eyes before he turned away. Kaname slowly buttoned up his shirt before lying down, gratefully resting his still spinning head on the pillows. The tablets had taken the edge off his thirst but he still needed to rest and let his body replenish the blood it had lost if he wanted Zero to bite him again later. No ifs though, Kaname definitely wanted Zero to bite him again. He grabbed a spare pillow, turned onto his side and hugged the pillow tightly to his chest.

Letting out a tired but happy sigh, Kaname leisurely relieved every moment of the past couple of hours in his mind, starting with how wonderful Zero looked when he opened the door. The highly anticipated bite had gone far better than Kaname had hoped and even Zero's brusque words earlier were forgotten. Kaname hugged the pillow tighter as he recalled how delightfully Zero had teased his neck earlier and how wonderfully delicious it had felt to be the recipient of those warm hugs, those tender kisses and gentle caresses. Kaname was aware that it was Yuuki Zero longed for and not him but it was still better than nothing. At least it was him Zero turned to and not someone else…

With that encouraging thought in mind and a very sleepy yawn, Kaname closed his eyes and snuggled deeper under the covers. The very last thought that crossed his mind just before he drifted off to sleep made him smile again.

_The best thing is, my weekend has only just begun._

- Chapter End -


	15. Chapter 15: The Acceptance

**Author Notes: **Hello, I'm back! Thank you all so very much for your lovely, lovely reviews! _-squeals- _I'm so happy that you like Kaname here, I am! _-ignores regal, pureblood glare aimed at the back of her head- _I initially didn't have any idea of what to write for this weekend but after struggling with it, I now have. More or less. Hope you won't find it too boring _-cringes- _As for when will Zero open his eyes, well, he will get there but he's walking towards it and not galloping at full speed so it wiill take some time. Enjoy this chapter!

**Appreciation: **My grateful thanks to **Pink Bead Girl **for giving me endless inspiration when I don't have the time or energy to continue.

- Chapter Start -

When Zero next opened his eyes, it was still dark. At first, he thought he had slept the whole day through. He sat up quickly and brought his wrist up to squint at his watch. It was an hour to dawn so that meant he had slept for five hours. It was hardly adequate rest for an adult but still more than the couple of hours' of restless sleep he had been surviving on for the past few months. It could have been due to his bout of gruelling physical exercise or the rich food and expensive wine he had had after that or even the very hearty dose of pure blood right after but it was most likely a combination of all of them. In any case, Zero was pleased that he had slept soundly. He felt pretty good right now except for a mild headache brought on by the alcohol. He yawned, ran a hand through his hair and decided that he might as well get up. He wouldn't be able to fall asleep again so soon and besides... it would soon be time to visit Yuuki.

With that bittersweet thought in mind, Zero swung his legs onto the floor and stood up. He linked his fingers together and stretched his arms high above his head before leaning to the right and then left and lastly, forward. The stretch in his neck, shoulders, back and legs felt very good indeed. Zero had swapped his jeans for a pair of running shorts before sleeping and didn't feel like taking a shower just yet. Perhaps after a hot cup of coffee to chase the headache away first? Yes, that sounded good. Kaname might like one as well. And speaking of the pureblood...

Zero carefully reached out with his senses but Kaname's presence was very quiet as if he was fast asleep. Well, it wouldn't hurt to make sure, would it? Zero wouldn't normally dream of invading the pureblood's privacy like this but the memory of holding a helpless, trembling creature in his arms just a few hours ago was a very compelling one. He just wanted to make sure that Kaname was all right... even though there was no reason to suppose that he might not be. Deciding against wearing his slippers, Zero made his way to Kaname's room barefoot, flicking on one of the shaded table lamps in the living room on the way and trying hard not to talk himself out of it. He had never before checked up on Kaname like this especially after knowing the pureblood was asleep. It was - if nothing else - a gross invasion of privacy. It was also a risky one since there was no telling how a just awakened pureblood might react to the presence of someone else in his room. Still, Zero felt... compelled. Yes. Compelled and with reason. After all, Kaname has been so clingy and vulnerable earlier, it was only logical and perhaps even expected that he should go check...

At this point, Zero stopped thinking before he got himself confused again. He could feel his face warming up and knew why that was. They had both behaved very uncharacteristically earlier - Kaname asking outright to be held and Zero complying with an hour long embrace. He still wasn't quite sure what to make of this 'holding Kaname while biting him' thing. If it was going to be a recurring theme in their future feeding sessions, it was going to be at best, comforting and at worst, awkward. _Very _awkward.

Before he knew it, Zero found himself in front of Kaname's room door. He took a deep breath, closed his fingers around the door knob and turned it silently. The door was unlocked just as he knew it would be. Zero slipped inside, leaving the door slightly ajar so that some of the dim light from the living room spilled in. His eyesight had grown more keen after feeding on Kaname's blood for decades but he still couldn't see in almost total darkness, the way the pureblood could.

Well, Kaname was definitely asleep. Zero stopped by the bed and gazed down at him. He could make out the long hair spilling over the snowy white pillow in dark waves and a portion of that creamy profile and perfect nose. The rest of Kaname was hidden against the pillow or under the covers. He looked completely relaxed and deeply asleep.

A surprised, almost tender smile curved Zero's lips without him realising it. Once, the fact that he could creep up on Kaname unawares like this would have been a strange and even disturbing thought but now, not really. Zero knew that Kaname regarded Cross Academy as a safe haven so it made sense that he could fully relax here. In fact, Zero suddenly found himself wondering if Kaname slept as soundly in one of his numerous homes... perhaps not. Zero had always known that it wasn't palatial bedrooms or luxurious bed linen that made for sound sleep, but the people who lived there, bringing with them comfort, safety, love and most of all, a sense of belonging. It was obvious Kaname felt very safe here and Zero took pride in it, feeling it was a tribute to how he and Yuuki had made the pureblood a part of their family. The hunter felt his throat start to swell with remembered grief and quickly diverted his thoughts.

Perhaps Kaname was exhausted since his body was hard at work regenerating the blood it had lost? That was the most obvious reason, wasn't it? Zero's heart gave a guilty twinge at this but he ignored it. He had taken a little too much earlier but he rather thought that Kaname had asked for it. Or begged even.

Perhaps Kaname was just catching up on sleep then? That was a very likely reason too. Zero knew all about the pureblood's habit of burning both ends of the candle _and _the middle at the same time. He often treated sleep and food as optional rather than necessary. No doubt he had felt compelled to finish off a whole month's worth of work in order to qualify himself for a weekend off. Typical Kaname...Zero shook his head slowly, still staring down at his slumbering brother-in-law who looked... well, he looked - uh, there had to be a word one could use other than 'endearing' but right now, Zero just couldn't think of any. And no, one did not apply the adjective 'adorable' to a full grown pureblood either!

Zero's smile turned into a scowl. That's it - no more thinking about Kaname! He turned around abruptly and made for the door, annoyed at his wayward thoughts and unaware that one chocolate eye had blinked open sleepily and was now looking at him. Zero made his way to the kitchen, huffing to himself and belatedly remembering his need for coffee. He set the percolator going before rummaging in the refrigerator and cupboards, taking out milk, butter, flour and eggs. It was actually the equivalent of midnight for vampires now but since he was making coffee, he might as well whip up some pancakes to go with it. For one thing, it would give him something to think about which was better than thinking about Kaname all the time. For another, it would give him something useful to do. For a third, Kaname would probably be hungry when he woke up and would want something to eat.

Damn, he was _still _thinking about Kaname! Zero glowered down at the innocent looking eggs as he methodically cracked them one at a time into his favourite mixing bowl. He measured the other ingredients and added them to the eggs, stopping in between to pour himself a cup of fragrant, bitter coffee. He was fine with instant but right now, he felt like having something stronger to get rid of his headache. Besides, pancakes went so much better with freshly brewed coffee and Kaname always enjoyed the latter with generous lashings of butter and maple syrup. Zero went back to the refrigerator to check if he had the syrup. He didn't but there was wild honey in the cupboard and Kaname enjoyed that too, so that was fine.

Oh God, he was doing it _again! _Zero groaned, ran his hands through his hair and told himself it was hopeless. He finally let his mind wander where it would and it happily pounced on the subject of Kaname. The pureblood would inevitably complain that he would have to get new trousers tailored each time Zero made pancakes but he managed to put away almost as much as the twins just the same. The frown on Zero's brow eased into a smile as he efficiently blended the ingredients together with an egg whisk. He was remembering the time his then six year old twins challenged Kaname-Ojii-san to a competition as to who could eat the most number of pancakes. Zero's smile turned a little wry as he recalled how that competition had turned out. Ichiru had stuffed the last bite into his mouth, intelligibly declared himself the winner and then promptly shot out of his chair to rush off to the bathroom where he threw up his breakfast into the toilet. Isamu had followed him there and came back to the table a moment later to announce himself the new winner running off again to see if his older twin was all right. Yuko had shaken her head in regal disdain as she continued feeding herself precise mouthfuls of pancake while informing her uncle that she was going to officially disown her younger brothers. Yuuki was trying hard to hold back her infectious giggles while comiserating on what a shame Zero's pancakes had been wasted before going to look in on the boys. Kaname hadn't said anything at all but Zero could tell from the way he was looking down at his plate that Kaname felt he was somehow to blame. Zero had ended up reassuring him that the twins had never needed encouragement in the first place. They were both duly punished, of course. Zero could still recall Isamu piping up to ask if Kaname-ojii-san was going to be punished as well for taking part in the competition. His father had to quickly intervene before Kaname could answer; he had a feeling the pureblood was going to agree to it which was of course completely ridiculous.

But... that was the Kaname Kuran they knew. He never behaved like a typical pureblood in front of them. It was a good thing too since Zero would never have put up with any sort of arrogant, selfish or calculating behaviour in his home but on the other hand, there was no call for Kaname to behave in such an opposing manner either, was there? And therefore, piped up that annoying voice in Zero's head again after having bided its time, there was no reason for him, Zero, to feel guilty about what had happened earlier either, was there?

_But it's not guilt I feel!_

Zero had already rationalised his actions in his mind before he hugged Kaname earlier. He was OK with that. He was. Kaname had needed the comfort of a hug from someone he trusted and Zero had needed the warmth of having someone in his arms. It had worked both ways and it had felt unexpectedly, _wonderfully _good. Zero just didn't know _why _it felt that good. He sighed as he lit the stove, placed a non stick frying pan on it and added a small knob of butter. He wasn't guilty, he was just... confused. Confused and uneasy because he knew, he just _knew _that that hug was going to set the precedent for all future feeding sessions to come. That meant that each time he bit Kaname, the pureblood would be in his arms, trembling, begging for more and generally making Zero feel like he belonged there when he... didn't.

_Oh, for Heaven's sake, lighten up, Kiryuu! _

Zero took a long, deep breath and exhaled it out. He was making this into a big deal again. All right, no more acting uptight. He understood Kaname's need for reassurance and he was cool with this, right? He needed to be cool with it before Kaname woke up because there was just no telling what the pureblood would get up to once he awoke. Oh, you mean other than wanting to be bitten _again_? asked that sly little voice with a nasty sounding snicker. Zero clenched his teeth and pretended not to hear it, telling himself it was a good thing Kaname's blood wasn't high in calories otherwise he would soon be the plumpest hunter in the HA!

He glanced at his watch before pouring in a ladle of batter. Actually, he shouldn't be surprised that Kaname was still sleeping. Once the pureblood got his head into his punishing work schedule, he would focus on it to the point of forgetting all else. If Seiren was around, she would quietly and unobtrusively supply take away but that could only go so far - she would never dream of reminding the pureblood to rest or reprimanding him for not eating. Even Yuuki wouldn't dare to offer anything more than a gentle reminder. No. The only person who would dare tell Kaname what to do in no uncertain terms was Zero himself.

Of course there could be another reason why Kaname was this tired. He could have simply been out painting the town red and Zero made a face at the unwelcome double meaning that phrase implied. He knew this wasn't the case though. Kaname guarded his privacy jealously and appeared to have little social life. There were the usual vampire gatherings and gala evenings that he attended but they were kept to a strict minimum and accepted only when it wasn't prudent to decline or when given by the nobles of his inner circle. Otherwise, Kaname spent all of his rare holidays at Cross Academy. He seemed very contented in the presence of his sister and her family instead of jetting off to exotic locations or hobnobbing with other purebloods and nobles. Granted, it wasn't as if there were truckloads of purebloods to hobnob with, and ambitiously simpering nobles were a right pain in the neck. Besides, Zero had always believed that being treated like family was anytime better than having to be on your guard or being fawned over. Still... it seemed an odd way for a pureblood to spend his off days, didn't it? It kind of looked as if... as if Kaname didn't have anyone else to be with. Perhaps he just preferred being with people he trusted and loved, people who would not bow and scrape before him but would treat him like a real person, stuff him with tasty home cooked food, include him in jokes and arguments and generally pretend he wasn't an exalted pureblood.

Yes, that was it - Kaname simply wished to be treated as a normal person. He needed someone to look after him and to make sure he didn't run himself into the ground. He needed someone he could relax and unwind with. Now, that wasn't so strange, was it? Zero mentally asked that voice in his head.

Oh yeah? back came the answer immediately. Well, what about someone who would also bite him frequently, someone who would give him warm and unreserved hugs whenever he bared his neck and someone who would willingly proffer a cheek whenever he got into one of those cryptic "Just a...' moods? And most of all, what about someone who would find a way to erase the wistful loneliness that had haunted those dark eyes for so long and replace it with laughter and happiness?

Zero froze in the midst of flipping the pancake over, feeling suddenly hot and cold all over. Then he scowled darkly. Kaname had only been here for a few hours and he was already wrecking havoc on his thoughts! It was bad enough for Zero to have anticipated his visit for the past five days but now this! Worse still, his nonsensical thoughts were making him blush like a teenager. Damnit, why did he keep _thinking _these strange thoughts about Kaname? Why couldn't he stop thinking of how delicious Kaname had felt in his arms? Why couldn't he just brush off those kisses?And why was Kaname acting this way around him when he had never done so before?

Zero wasn't a prude but he wasn't an overly demonstrative person either. He freely dispensed hugs and kisses to his wife and children but this was Kaname - another man! Zero bit his lip. So what if his adopted father used to do it to his sensei all the time? That was different - they were lovers! They had a reason to act close and intimate... the way he and Yuuki used to do all the time. Zero blinked rapidly to clear his blurring vision. He slid the golden pancake onto a clean plate and poured more batter into the pan, thinking furiously and forgetting all about putting Kaname out of his mind. It was a lost cause anyway.

So perhaps it was a just a vampire social custom practised by the upper echelon then? But it couldn't be, Zero had never seen any vampire dare to put their face too close to Kaname's. Not even Takuma. No French air kisses, not even from those snooty French aristocrats who had predictably looked down on Zero during one of those long drawn out vampire gala dinners he attended as Kaname's pretend bodyguard.

No. As far as he knew, he was the only receiver of those kisses. Zero hung his head, willing the sudden surge of heat in his face to dissipate. Perhaps Kaname thought it was perfectly normal to peck his brother-in-law on the cheek now and again as long as he could come up with an excuse no matter how flimsy but but Zero didn't. So he should put a stop to them _right now _instead of wondering how would Kaname explain away his next kiss because somehow, Zero knew that they would keep on coming. After all, he hadn't exactly told the pureblood off, had he?

Zero huffed again and flipped the pancake over. Wait - Kaname had also given similar affectionate gestures kisses to Yuuki and the children in the past, hadn't he? Zero frowned absently, ignoring the familiar sweet pang in his heart as he searched his mind for those happier memories. Yes, Kaname was always openly affectionate to them but he had never before kissed Zero nor had the hunter ever expected it. He was happy enough having Kaname on 'their' side as it were...

So perhaps the pureblood was just kissing him because he was there and the others weren't? Zero found that he didn't quite like that idea either. He slid the cooked pancake onto the plate, still thinking hard. Could it be that Kaname was just lonely and wanted someone to be with him and take care of him? He already had directors, managers, executives, lackeys, chauffeurs, housekeepers and housemaids at his disposal - all of them skilled, intelligent, highly trained and perfectly capable to helping him manage his professional and personal life but apparently, it wasn't enough. He still wanted someone whom he could and did trust one hundred percent.

Someone who wasn't already attached.

Someone who didn't have a hidden agenda.

Someone who wasn't interested in getting a share of his name or his power, riches or connections.

Someone he could let down his guard with, someone in whose presence he could even fall asleep.

Someone who would only have his best interest at heart because that was exactly how he had treated the pureblood for the past thirty over years.

In other words, someone like Zero Kiryuu who had never given a damn about Kaname Kuran the pureblood but who cared a lot about Kaname Kuran, his brother-in-law and blood donor. Zero stared unseeingly down at the pan. Yes, he did fit the image of that 'someone', didn't he? Granted, he was very much interested in Kaname's blood but that was iffy since it was willingly given and gratefully received. So if that was the case then - then -

"Good morning, Zero."

Zero swung around, startled into almost dropping the plate in his hand. Damn, Kaname had awakened? When? Had he known that Zero had entered his room? Could he read his mind now? All these questions zoomed around Zero's head as he stared wordlessly at the pureblood, automatically taking in the freshly showered appearance, pristine cream linen shirt and soft wool pants in a dark chocolate shade. Damn, did Kaname have to dress like a GQ model all the time? And look even better? whispered that sly voice in Zero's head that appeared to have taken up permanent residence there and had no intention of ever moving away.

"How're you feeling?" Zero asked quietly, stoically ignoring the snickers echoing inside his head. Kaname didn't seem angry or suspicious though. He gave a dazzling smile, his face relaxed and happy. Despite the few hours of sleep he had, he looked well rested and was back to his confident self once more, a far cry from the trembling creature who had begged Zero to hold him earlier.

"As right as rain," Kaname assured him, coming further into the kitchen. He noted that Zero was dressed in the same T-shirt and a pair of running shorts. The short type. Kaname just only managed to keep his gaze above Zero's neck. The hunter was beautiful of course and the rest of him was lithe, toned perfection - Kaname would have been quite happy to stand in the kitchen doorway just ogling him from head to toe. He only wished he had dared to pull Zero down to him earlier when he was standing so close to the bed... but that probably would have made the hunter bolt like a frightened deer.

Zero nodded cautiously. He didn't say anything though. There was a bit of awkwardness between them given how intimately they had acted earlier so he just turned back to his pan.

"You must be hungry, right?" he said casually, not really needing a response. An instant later, a soft and warm pressure touched his cheek. Zero jumped in surprise, his sharp intake of breath now laced with a delicious whiff of Kaname's freshly showered scent. Zero _had _been half expecting that kiss but perhaps a little later, not right now! Kaname's lightning fast action had caught him completely off guard. In fact, Kaname had been counting on the element of surprise and was already holding the laden plate when Zero let go of it.

"I am hungry and the pancakes smell delicious," Kaname smiled.

_But you, my dear Zero, smell even better._

"Damnit, do you have to stand so close and what do you call _that _one?" Zero hissed at him. He rubbed his cheek, hoping he wasn't flushed... too much. Kaname merely gave an elegant shrug, not looking in the least bit perturbed.

"Just a hello," he murmured and handed the plate to Zero. "Besides," he added casually. "A simple kiss like that doesn't have to be quantified, does it?"

Kaname tilted his head as he regarded Zero with another smile but inside, he was on on tenterhooks waiting for the hunter's reply. Zero dropped his gaze as he took back the plate and set it down. Then he sighed before giving a shrug.

"I guess not," he said very softly. So much for wanting to put a stop to it - Zero stoically ignored the by now hysterical laughter echoing inside his head. He glanced up to see Kaname's delighted smile and quickly looked back down again. He supposed he _could _live with those impromptu kisses... _if _forced to. After all, Kaname would hardly do that sort of thing in public and there _were _worse things the pureblood could demand from him. Besides, it really was too little a thing to quibble about. Zero shrugged aside the uneasy thought that letting a pureblood have an inch probably wasn't the wisest thing in the world.

Kaname could have hugged himself, the pancakes and Zero with joy. His head had stopped spinning, he had had sufficient rest for now, Zero had cared enough to peep in on him, he had kissed the hunter again and was still alive. Even better, Zero seemed reconciled to that gesture, the fluffy golden discs smelled delicious and would be heavenly drizzled with butter and maple syrup and washed down with that fragrant hot coffee... Kaname took a deep breath and let it out happily as he went to pour himself a cup.

Life was beautiful. Now the only thing he needed to worry about was getting Zero to bite him again.

- o -

Kaname ate a stack of pancakes that would have surprised Ichiru and Isamu if they had seen it. Zero had guessed correctly, donating blood made for an increased appetite. He smiled in quiet satisfaction as he watched Kaname spread butter liberally on his fifth pancake, looking a little like a child on Christmas morning. Zero made a note to himself to cook more whenever he bit Kaname in future.

"Looks like I'll have to feed you more often," Zero remarked casually. Kaname looked up, still chewing. His lips were glossy with a coating of butter and honey and something in Zero's heart stirred at the sight. No male should ever have lips like that, it wasn't... fair. Kaname swallowed his mouthful when he saw how intently Zero was staring at his mouth.

"Excuse me?" Kaname asked carefully, telling his heart not to be too hopeful. Zero blinked and looked a little flustered.

"Uh, I meant how do you manage to stay so thin?" he asked a little more exasperatedly than he meant to. Kaname shrugged.

"It's not the fault of your cooking," he hastened to reassure Zero but the hunter wasn't appeased.

"Uh-huh," he nodded. "I bet I know why - you hardly eat anything unless you're at Cross Academy, am I right?" He pinned Kaname with an almost smug look and Kaname gave a half pout before he realised what he was doing.

"I eat everyday," he said and the almost defiant note in his voice made Zero smirk inwardly. He gave a wise parental sort of nod.

"Just enough to keep one alive. I thought so," he countered. Kaname only shrugged again.

"It's enough for me," he replied simply. Perhaps it was the acceptance in his voice but Zero suddenly remembered what Kaname had said to him during last week's trip, about wanting to call for room service if Zero wasn't going to join him for a meal. And about what it had implied - eating all alone in an impersonal if luxurious hotel room with only his notes and work for company... time and time again... trip following trip... year after year...

"Well, eat up," Zero said briskly. "You need food so that your body can recov-"

"I'm fine," Kaname cut in quickly. He didn't want Zero to feel guilty again. "I rested enough and -"

"That's not what I meant," Zero interrupted but Kaname wasn't finished. He didn't ever want to hear that guilt in his beloved hunter's voice.

"Zero, would it make you feel better if I told you that some of my happiest memories of Cross Academy are of you biting me?"

The utter seriousness in Kaname's dark eyes and the words themselves made goose bumps ripple all over Zero's skin. He stared at Kaname, stunned, all guilt - imaginary or otherwise - forgotten.

"Yeah?" he finally mumbled. Kaname nodded.

"Yes. So please..." he continued, reaching across the kitchen table to lightly touch Zero's hand. "Stop feeling guilty. Please stop feeling guilty about needing or wanting my blood. Stop thinking that you shouldn't bite me. Stop feeling like you owe me. You owe me nothing. Nothing at all. In fact, if anything... I owe you."

_Ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous._

Zero stared back at Kaname, his throat closing up. He knew that Kaname was touching his hand and that they were once again talking of that taboo secret between them but all he could do was stare at the pureblood as if he had never seen him before. A minute ticked silently by and finally, Zero cleared his throat.

"Kaname, I..." he began huskily but Kaname shook his head and reluctantly withdrew his hand.

"Don't ever stop wanting my blood, Zero," he said quietly.

_Don't ever stop wanting a part of me. Any part at all._

Zero swallowed once more and nodded. He took a deep breath, let it out slowly and realised two things. The first was that he had been carrying a burden on his shoulders ever since he woke up, however unconsciously. The second was that Kaname's words had lifted it off for him... perhaps for good.

"How do you do it?" Zero asked impulsively. Kaname's eyebrows went up.

"Do what?" he asked. Zero bit his lip.

"Read my mind," he said simply and gave a tentative smile. Kaname smiled back, relieved.

"Trade secret," he whispered mischeviously, turning Zero's smile into a reluctant grin.

"Egotistical pureblood," he shot back but the pureblood only laughed softly, his eyes sparkling and his heart so full of joy that he could hardly contain it all.

"So you'll bite me again, Zero? And soon?" Kaname asked before he could help himself. Then he stopped abruptly, eyes widening in dismay. He could have bitten out his tongue... but miracle of miracles, Zero only pinned him with a half hearted glare.

"You're never going to let up, are you?" he scolded in a half amused, half resigned tone. Kaname shook his head, not trusting himself to speak in case he said something else wrong. Zero exhaled and nodded.

"Well, later. I have an important appointment to keep first," he said softly. The now wistful smile on his face told Kaname what it was.

"I'm coming with you," he invited himself. He didn't intend to let Zero out of his sight and besides... he wanted to visit Yuuki too. Zero nodded again. He hadn't expected Kaname to say anything else.

"And then... after that?" the pureblood asked tentatively. He was being pathetic again but he didn't care.

"After that, I'm going to catch the morning news," Zero warned him. "Think you can survive that long?" he teased with a rare, playful smile. Kaname wanted so badly to smile back but he fought to keep his face straight. He pursed his lips thoughtfully, unaware of how it made Zero stare at his mouth again.

"I think I can," Kaname replied seriously. Zero nodded back gravely.

"You'd better eat that last pancake then," he warned. "So that you'll be ready."

Kaname released his smile and beamed at him before reaching for the plate, his heart alight with joy.

_If you say so, Zero. But I've been ready for years._

- Chapter End -


	16. Chapter 16: The Worry

**Author Notes: **Hello and thank you all so much for your most encouraging reviews! _-blows everyone a kiss- _What with being understaffed for the past two months and it being the year end school holidays, I was hard pressed to find time to work on this chapter but at last, it's done... Merry Christmas or Season's Greetings to everyone! Enjoy...

- Chapter Start -

The early morning air was cool and crisp, promising a bright and sunny day ahead. The sun was just peeping over the horizon, spreading gentle rays of gold when Kaname and Zero reached the cemetery. They got down from the car and walked past the gates in a comfortable though bittersweet silence, the grass beneath their shoes wet with dew. Zero had first driven them to the early morning market in town and he was carrying a single perfect lily while Kaname held a dozen white rosebuds tied with a wide silver ribbon. With his eyes hidden behind his sunglasses, Kaname felt safe in glancing sideways at his companion every now and again. Zero had showered and was now wearing a clean black T-shirt paired with black jeans. Kaname's gaze lingered longingly on the damp strands of silver hair, wishing he could just reach over and touch them, wishing he could let the silky strands slide through his fingers without running the risk of Zero thinking him mad.

__

One day... I will.

For now though, Kaname was more concerned with how sombre Zero looked, so different from the smiling man who had teased him over the pancakes earlier. Kaname had enjoyed their banter very much. He was especially thrilled that Zero could even tease him about biting him - something that had seemed almost impossible a mere week or so ago. But Zero was not smiling anymore and his melancholy mood was affecting Kaname who had his own grief to struggle with. He missed Yuuki too, very much. He wished that she hadn't died so young and left her family bereft. He deeply regretted that he hadn't managed to save her even though he had done all that he, his money and his connections possibly could. And yet... Kaname inhaled shakily, willing the stinging in his eyes to go away. And yet... out of that bitter loss, a most unexpected silver lining had appeared - Yuuki's passing had given him the opportunity he hadn't thought he would ever have - the chance to earn Zero's love for himself.

__

No, I won't ever give up this chance. No matter how long it takes.

With that resolve, hope returned in a sudden rush of warmth and a small, almost secretive smile appeared on Kaname's lips. Almost of their own accord, his shoulders straightened and he inhaled again, deeply this time. He could detect the various fresh scents around him that held the promise of a new day and he delighted in the fact that amongst them was the soft scent of the man walking beside him. Kaname moved a little closer to Zero and let his bouquet brush lightly but deliberately against the other's jean clad leg, causing the delicate buds to release a light cloud of fragrance between them. Kaname didn't dare look at Zero when he felt the other's enquiring gaze shift to him but he should have because there was a small smile on Zero's face as well.

The hunter's gaze slid briefly over the elegant pureblood walking beside him, his legs easily keeping up with Kaname's unhurried, graceful strides. Zero had thought he would be loathe to share this very private, very precious time with Yuuki with anyone other than their children but it felt... nice to have someone else with him this morning. Perhaps it was because he had had enough of his own morose company for now or perhaps it was because that someone was in all likelihood the only one who could understand and share his grief over losing the most precious girl in their lives. After all, Kaname was the only other man who had loved Yuuki just as much, even if not exactly in the same way.

A couple of minutes later, the two vampires neared their destination. Kaname slowed down his steps, silently signalling to Zero to go ahead. Yuuki had been Kaname's younger sister but Zero had been her husband and the father of their children - that relation transcended any sibling bond, however close. When Zero looked back at him, Kaname tilted his head in a courteous 'You go first' gesture. To his surprise, Zero grinned and shook his head once before tilting it in a clear 'Come on here' gesture instead. He didn't wait for Kaname's response before turning around. That selfless gesture alone was enough to make Kaname's breath hitch in his throat as he stepped closer, fiercely glad that he had come here with Zero instead of on his own.

"Hello, dearest," Zero murmured as he knelt beside the tombstone with the picture of that sweet, beloved heart shaped face embedded in the smooth polished surface. "Kaname arrived here last night. We're a bit early today but I'm sure you don't mind, do you?"

Zero was already used to talking to Yuuki as if she were really here. Perhaps he would have felt a little silly if someone else were here with him but somehow... he knew that Kaname wouldn't mind. Indeed the pureblood didn't. He sank down gracefully beside Zero and placed the roses gently on the young grass covering the grave.

"Hello, Yuuki," he greeted huskily, feeling that bittersweet ache in his heart swell. "It's good to be back in Cross Academy. I miss you so much..."

- o -

The two vampires stayed there for almost an hour. Zero would have stayed longer if he were alone but he noticed how Kaname was trying to avoid the slanting rays of the rising sun without being too obvious about it and suggested that they leave before other visitors came. In the car, Kaname again found himself glancing repeatedly at Zero but the hunter didn't notice and seemed lost in thought as he drove them back to Cross Academy, absently lifting a hand at the watchman's greeting at the main gates. He didn't even glance in Kaname's direction as they got down from the car and went back inside the Chairman's quarters.

Immediately, the heaviness in Kaname's heart returned tenfold. He told himself he was just being silly but the fact of the matter was, Zero's mood affected him - then and now... perhaps even more than ever. Zero had promised to bite him after watching the morning news but with the subdued mood he was in, Kaname wasn't sure if that was going to happen. Zero might feel even less like feeding if the morning news was bad - who on earth would have an appetite after hearing about road accidents or natural disasters? With a sigh, Kaname removed his sunglasses and pocketed them, unconsciously worrying his lower lip as he watched Zero. He was more than adept at showing a calm and capable, even ruthless facade when chairing a meeting or dealing with subordinates but dealing with Zero was another matter altogether. When it came to his beloved hunter, Kaname couldn't think with his head at all... only with his heart. To make matters worse, he couldn't guess what was going to happen next. This made the whole thing unpredictable, nerve wracking even... but most of all, exciting. Deliriously exciting.

Seemingly oblivious to Kaname's hopeless gaze and tumultuous thoughts, Zero glanced at the wall clock and went to sit down on the sofa. He reached for the TV remote lying on the coffee table automatically as though this was something he did every morning without fail. With a silent sigh, Kaname finally turned and went to his room to wash his hands. Two minutes later, he was still standing in front of the sink, feeling uncharacteristically indecisive. He caught himself staring pensively at his worried reflection in the bathroom mirror and smiled wryly to himself. If any other pureblood could catch him now, they would laugh their heads off before licking their fangs and closing in for the kill. Kaname shook his head.

__

No. I will not lose hope.

He took a deep breath and nodded resolutely at his reflection. It was OK. If Zero wanted some time alone to think of Yuuki and remember the happy times they had shared, that was fine with him. It was more than fine, it was... expected. Kaname would just find something else to do, that was all. He gave a fleeting thought to his briefcase back at his apartment. Work was out of the question but he could make himself useful here. Perhaps he would start off by going into the kitchen to make a pot of tea. After all, he had the whole weekend to spend with Zero, what was a lost hour or even two? He was sure Zero had no intention of spending the next forty plus hours going about his home with his fangs permanently buried in the pureblood's neck as much as Kaname would want him to. That would hardly be practical, would it? Kaname had to smile at the rather silly mental picture his mind insisted on showing him. He was just being paranoid, that was all. Kaname took a deep breath, ran his wet fingers through his hair and walked back out.

Zero was occupying the centre seat of the sofa, a slightly worn but comfortably padded leather three seater. Kaname hesitated. There were other equally comfortable chairs placed around the coffee table but his eyes kept straying to the two available seats on either side of Zero. Both were equally tempting... but no. Kaname forced himself to go the kitchen instead where he boiled water, made the tea and carried out the two steaming mugs. He was a little hesitant to rock the boat but he remembered his resolve. Quietly, Kaname skirted around the sofa and sat down on Zero's right, placing the mugs on the coffee table at the same time. He could feel the moment the startled amethyst gaze shifted to him but he was careful to keep his eyes on the TV, pretending it had caught his interest. In actual fact, he had no idea what the man was talking about and was mentally counting down the minutes until the news finished.

"Thanks," Zero said softly as he reached for his mug.

"You're welcome," Kaname murmured. He wanted so badly for Zero to reassure him that he hadn't forgotten his earlier promise but he just couldn't get the words to come out without sounding utterly selfish and fixated on his own petty needs. Perhaps he was.

__

In fact, perhaps I should have asked Zero to bite me before going to visit Yuuki...

But then Zero would want to go to the cemetery before the sun got too hot and that would cut short his session with Kaname. It definitely wouldn't be as glorious as last night's. Kaname sipped at his tea, desperately wishing he knew how to get back the playful Zero who had teased him over the pancakes earlier. Zero wasn't shy about teasing him in the past but that had always been about food or his work schedule and there was always Yuuki or the children around. This... this was different. Zero wasn't teasing Kaname to get him to eat more... or ease up... or to amuse someone else. He was teasing Kaname about biting him solely because he wanted to and Kaname found it utterly, _wonderfully _precious. It showed that Zero was interested in life again or at least a part of it and it was something Kaname had dreamt of for years - getting Zero to bite him not because he needed to feed but because he _wanted _to. For the fun of it. No, not fun per se... but for the sheer pleasure it gave both of them. Kaname took another gulp of the hot tea and tried to think of something else, something that wouldn't cause his heart to race.

The ten minutes it took the newsreader to conclude his task passed painfully slowly for Kaname. He and Zero were both silent as they stared at the screen, occasionally sipping at their tea instead of talking. As soon as the news ended with a cheery good morning, Zero set his empty mug down and reached for the TV remote again. His hand wasn't as steady as before and he knew why that was. He had barely heard what the newsreader was droning on about because he was too conscious of the pureblood sitting quietly beside him, staring at the TV as if seeing it for the first time. Zero pressed the 'Off' button, the screen went blank and the detergent commercial was cut off midway. The resultant silence seemed overly loud in the living room.

Zero stared down at the remote in his hand, still wondering why Kaname had chosen to sit right next to him instead of taking one of the other chairs. Was it merely so that he could look straight at the TV more comfortably instead of at an angle? Or was it because Kaname wanted to sit close to him? Zero wasn't sure which reason he preferred to be the truth and why that was. All he knew was that Kaname's close proximity was playing havoc with his concentration. All throughout the news, Zero couldn't think of anyone else but him, and the promise he had made the pureblood. In fact, going to visit Yuuki with Kaname had reminded Zero of so many other things... in particular, how the pureblood had stood by them all these years. Kaname could have chosen to disown or ignore Yuuki since she had chosen to stay by the side of a Level D and a promising vampire hunter. He could have chosen to concentrate solely on building his business and getting as much power, prestige and pleasure as he could... but he hadn't. The pureblood had changed seemingly overnight - going from a stern and remote love rival to a caring benefactor. He had continued to protect both Yuuki, Zero and their family as it grew and visited them as often as he could. He had treated Zero far better than the latter could have ever expected and had genuinely loved all the Kiryuu offspring even if none of them were nobles or even normal class vampires. All this... because he loved Yuuki.

Zero chanced a second sideways glance at the stiffly sitting pureblood on his right. Kaname hadn't stopped staring at the TV screen even though it was now blank. It could only mean one thing - he was thinking of the exact same thing. Zero put down the remote control. He took a deep breath and exhaled loudly, causing Kaname to blink and look at him.

"Well," Zero began and then paused. Kaname was wearing a slightly abashed expression that confirmed Zero's suspicions.

"I guess... you probably think me pathetic," Kaname started hesitantly. The calm and assured air he had on earlier had vanished completely. Zero glimpsed the shadow of vulnerability lurking in those dark eyes before Kaname quickly looked down. Did their visit to Yuuki's grave do that? Zero thought that they had gotten along quite well this morning, judging by the happy smiles sent his way over the pancakes but the look on Kaname's face now reminded him more of how he had behaved last night. Zero tried half-heartedly to suppress a protective instinct that was rearing up inside him. The voice inside his head wasn't helping either - it piped up to remind him that it was high time he kept his promise to Kaname. As if he needed any sort of reminder.

"Well, no..." Zero began again but he fell silent when Kaname shook his head.

"Be honest, Zero," he said wryly. "I haven't been able to think of anything else for the past ten minutes except for you biting me again."

There, he had said it. Right after he promised himself he wouldn't. Right after he promised himself to give Zero time. Pathetic _and _selfish _and _fixated on his petty needs. Kaname gave Zero a rather embarrassed smile and quickly turned back to the TV, willing his hands not to shake as he clasped them tightly together, elbows resting on his knees. He knew Zero was staring at him and suddenly wished that he wouldn't - so much for wanting Zero's attention earlier!

Zero found his unease melting away to nothing at Kaname's unexpectedly shy behaviour. He was even reluctantly enchanted with the faint blush painting Kaname's perfect cheekbones. A crooked smile tilted Zero's lips and he shrugged - he was the same, wasn't he? Honestly, who on earth could possible concentrate on something as mundane as yesterday's happenings when there was a pale tender neck just inches away, housing the most delicious blood in the world, available and completely his for the taking?

When Kaname heard a soft chuckle, he swung back to Zero, lips parting in surprise and then parting a little more at the sight of those amethyst eyes looking at him with gentle amusement once more.

"In that case, consider us both pathetic," Zero remarked, rolling his eyes a little. "I couldn't think of anything else either," he confessed with a touch of his customary frankness. Kaname sucked in a breath, his traitorous heart quickening its pace.

"Really?" he asked in a hushed tone. Zero nodded gravely back and Kaname smiled, shoulders sagging in relief.

"I thought that you had..." he started impulsively and then stopped, wary of saying the wrong thing again. When Zero raised an eyebrow, Kaname shrugged deprecatingly.

"I thought that you had changed your mind," he admitted softly. Zero frowned uncomprehendingly at him.

"Why would I change my mind?" he asked, looking perplexed. "I promised, didn't I?"

"I know but..." Kaname began and then shrugged. "Forget about it. I'm glad you haven't changed your mind."

It was a beautiful day. The blasted sun was starting to slide far too bright rays past the cracks in the heavy drapes at the windows but Kaname had never felt more like smiling. God, he _was _pathetic...

"This is all your fault, you know," Zero grumbled half heartedly as he got to his feet. "For wanting to be bitten. Again."

__

Oh, so now it's my fault?

Kaname pouted and Zero immediately found his eyes drawn to the pureblood's lips. It was completely unfair how perfectly shaped they were and it was completely crazy how fixated he was on them.

"Damnit, don't do that!" he exploded suddenly, frustrated beyond reason. Kaname blinked up at him in surprise.

"Don't do what?" he asked, looking and sounding utterly bewildered. Zero made a frustrated gesture with his hand, not even knowing why he was suddenly feeling so edgy.

"That thing with your lips! Don't do that!"

Kaname blinked again. Then he realised what Zero was saying and looked down.

"Sorry," he mumbled, now staring down at his hands. Zero ran both hands through his hair, cursing himself for over-reacting. For the hundredth time.

__

Geez, what the hell is wrong with me? You want Kaname's blood, don't you? He wants you to bite him, doesn't he? Just - just do it!

But that would mean initiating another intimate session between them, one with very close physical contact. It wouldn't be the first time but Zero felt a little bit uncomfortable about it because he had just returned from Yuuki's grave. He would be embracing her brother very tightly in a minute or two. They wouldn't be doing anything wrong of course and it wasn't Kaname's fault - Zero's honesty refused to let the pureblood feel bad about this - but it was just that - oh God, if he thought about it anymore, he was going to end up a basket case! This was just a simple feeding session, Zero told himself sternly. Nothing more than that.

Not yet, sang that annoying voice in his head suddenly. Zero flushed and scowled heavily. That was it - no more thinking. Period!

"Forget it," he stated shortly. Kaname's heart sank.

"You mean, you don't... want to?" he asked, looking and sounding completely crestfallen. Zero's eyes widened as he realised that Kaname has misunderstood his words. Again.

"No! No, I want to, I just meant... uhm..."

Oh God, he had almost confessed to hearing snide voices in his head! Zero stumbled to a stop, horrified but his expression only made Kaname feel worse.

"Would you rather... bite me later?" he forced out past a painfully tight throat. Zero shook his head immediately.

"No, I didn't mean that," he started but Kaname was also talking, his words spilling over themselves in an unstoppable way that mortified him.

"It's fine - I'm fine with it if you want some... that is, if you would prefer- later perhaps... or-"

Zero shook his head, aware that Kaname was rushing into another misunderstanding and not wanting it to happen again.

"Nope," he replied firmly. "I want to bite you, Kaname. Now."

When Kaname only stared at him, Zero jerked his head in the direction of the study, his mouth set in a straight line.

"Let's go," he said abruptly, fed up of hearing that taunting voice in his head. To the uncertain pureblood looking at him though, it felt as if the hunter considered it more of an ordeal than a treat. Kaname remained seated, unsure of how to respond. He adored Zero's bite whether it was hungry and desperate or gentle and teasing but he never wanted it done in anger or reluctance because then it would mean nothing. No, it would mean less than nothing...

It took Zero a few moments to realise what Kaname must be feeling and why he was looking so apprehensive. He sighed, feeling again that strange ache in his chest. There had to be something wrong with him to find the sight of an unsure Kaname so appealing but right now, Zero didn't want to ponder about that. It would make him uneasy all over again. Instead, he placed his hands on his hips and tilted his head, giving Kaname the look he usually reserved for the twins.

"Oh, so who's the reluctant one now?" he asked with one raised eyebrow. Kaname stood up immediately as Zero had known he would.

"Reluctant? What's that?" Kaname deadpanned in return, making Zero grin. All of a sudden, his heart felt lighter and he didn't even know why. All he knew was that he was one very lucky hunter turned vampire turned hunter. His fangs were already throbbing in anticipation and that meant he was well on the way to being spoiled...

"Well, let's go then," he said and Kaname rejoiced to hear the gentler tone in Zero's voice. "It's going to be hot soon and that means all good vampires should be in bed, right?"

Kaname nodded, trying to push away the very pleasant images Zero's words invoked. He would happily stay in bed all day if the hunter were there too.

"I don't think I can fall asleep again so soon," he murmured but followed Zero obediently out of the living room. Zero stopped in front of the study and reached for the doorknob. He froze when Kaname's hand closed over his. Zero twisted his head to look over his shoulder, startled to find Kaname standing just behind him.

"Use my room this time," Kaname whispered huskily, his eyes regarding Zero steadily. Zero stared at him. Kaname's room? Why the hell did those words sound so... inviting? Even almost... seductive? It was just a different setting, another location, that was all. Zero ignored the way his heart was speeding up all of a sudden.

"Why?" he asked bluntly. Kaname raised a shoulder in an elegant shrug, looking very innocent.

"Why not?" he asked back. Zero's raised eyebrows said he wasn't buying it.

"_Why_, Kaname?" he asked again. He let his hand fall to his side, took a step back and folded his arms across his chest. Kaname started to pout and thought the better of it.

"Because the study always seems so impersonal," he murmured reluctantly. When Zero's eyebrows remained sceptically up, Kaname shrugged again.

"Just this once?" he asked hopefully. Zero found his suspicions weakening under the gaze of those soulful dark eyes. Alarm bells were starting to ring in his head but he shrugged and decided to ignore them.

"All right, just this once," he agreed and found himself ignoring something else - the demonic snickers echoing inside his head.

- o -

Kaname's heart was beating painfully fast when Zero closed the door behind them and found the light switch. It lit up the comfortable room with a warm yellow light meant for vampire eyes. When he turned around, Kaname was standing beside the foot of his bed, already halfway unbuttoning his shirt. Zero found himself regarding the pureblood curiously even as he walked closer.

"Do you really want me taking more so soon, Kaname?" he asked. Even then, he knew his question was rhetorical since his fangs were already elongating in anticipation. Kaname nodded once, his dark eyes fixed on Zero's face, appreciating how attractive he looked. Zero may not like being a vampire but there was something about those crimson tinted amethyst eyes and those sharp points in his mouth that made Kaname's mouth dry. Those fangs would soon be penetrating his flesh and driving deep... a shiver of delicious anticipation shook Kaname's lean frame.

"It's never too soon," he replied breathlessly, almost shaking with excitement as Zero closed the gap between them, standing only six inches away from him. They were well into each other's personal space now. They could smell only each other's scent, feel only each other's body heat and Kaname couldn't stand it anymore. He shrugged his shirt off and tossed it onto the bed in a single, decisive gesture.

"Bite me, Zero," he said, his words an erotic mixture of both plea and command. "Bite me now."

Zero blinked, both at the words and how attractive Kaname looked with his lips slightly parted and that dark hair lying on those pale, perfect shoulders, chest heaving slightly. This time, there was no hesitation at all on Zero's part with regards to the 'holding' bit of their arrangement. He wanted to... and he did. Zero grasped Kaname's arms and pulled him close until the pureblood was pressed up against his chest. He felt the soft, surprised exhalation that brushed his ear and knew it could only mean that Kaname hadn't been sure that he would be held this time. Zero couldn't help smiling at the fact that he had managed to catch the pureblood off guard but Kaname got his own back a moment later. He took advantage of how close his lips were to Zero's cheek and pressed a deliberate, warm kiss onto the silky, slightly downy skin. When Zero drew back a little to regard him, Kaname offered a quick smile with his heart still thudding away in his chest.

"I like kissing you like this, Zero," he murmured shyly. 'Love' or 'adore' was more like it but Kaname didn't want to freak Zero out and he sure as hell didn't want anything to disrupt this feeding session. To his relief, Zero only shook his head resignedly. He even gave a ghost of a smile before pulling Kaname close again. The pureblood rejoiced silently, shivering in delight as the hunter's cotton T-shirt brushed his bare chest and puckered his nipples. He slid his arms around the hunter's trim waist, relishing both the warm body contact and the irreplaceable feeling of being needed. This was how he had endured all those years... this was worth the lonely weeks and months of waiting. Yes - fully worth it, no matter how desolate he felt each time it ended.

Kaname's words made Zero flush hotly. He wished Kaname wouldn't say such embarrassing things but he was too preoccupied with the bare neck in front of him to think anymore of it. Without a word, Zero lowered his mouth and started tasting Kaname's smooth, silky skin. He started off with a slow and languid lick across a delicate collarbone, earning another soft inhalation of surprise from its owner. Then Zero started working his way from the base of Kaname's neck right up to his ear, creating a slow trail made up of nothing but light, teasing licks...

"Aahh!" The mere touch of Zero's tongue was enough to make Kaname tremble. He tightened his arms around Zero, eyes closing in bliss and head lolling to the side, focusing solely on the utterly exquisite sensation of being in Zero's arms again and being the centre of his world... for now at least. It was moments like this when Kaname was more than happy to sweep everything else aside, unimportant and unworthy of his attention.

It was pretty much the same for Zero but he controlled himself this time. He knew he had taken a little too much last night and fast as a pureblood's healing speed was, he didn't want to abuse this special privilege. This time, he told himself firmly, he was biting Kaname solely for the pleasure it gave them both, not to slake a non-existent thirst. Besides, with the way Kaname was quivering so very deliciously in his arms, all Zero could think was about giving him pleasure, comfort and reassurance. He gathered Kaname even closer to his chest in a warm hug, revelling in how the pureblood seemed to fit so perfectly into his arms... and trying very hard not to think of why that could possibly be wrong.

Kaname was mindful too, not to overstep the boundaries he knew were there... on Zero's side at least. He was careful to keep his hips from toucing Zero's, knowing how his body would respond but his legs shook as Zero's lips and tongue teased his neck again and again.

"Zero, p-please...!" moaned Kaname at last, his shaky fingers grabbing fistfuls of the back of Zero's T-shirt. His entire being was aching and burning for the hunter's fangs. The moment Zero gave in and sank them in with that characteristic suddenness of his, Kaname gasped sharply, almost seeing stars from the sharp burst of pleasure flaring in his sensitive neck and flaring outwards. He clung even tighter to Zero, panting softly, his heart racing in his chest. He wanted to get closer to the hunter... closer still... Forgetting his earlier caution, Kaname pressed as much of himself against the hunter as he could, sending Zero stumbling back a couple of steps before he recovered his balance.

Zero didn't think anything of it at first - his brain had shut down and all his senses were rejoicing in this very enjoyable activity, in the quivering warmth pressed against him, in the delicious scent and taste that filled his senses and mouth. It was only after half a dozen or so very careful swallows that Zero became uncomfortably aware of just how much pleasure Kaname was deriving from his bite. The moment Zero realised it, he couldn't ignore the insistent, growing pressure against his lower abdomen and he couldn't pretend it was anything else - it wasn't as if Kaname carried a gun in his pocket. Zero pulled his fangs out immediately, earning another shudder from the still oblivious pureblood. Zero grasped Kaname's upper arms and pushed him a little further away while keeping him steady at the same time.

"Shit," Zero mumbled. He felt as if his face was on fire. It had felt wonderful to hold Kaname close but it was a shock to the senses to feel something twitching - twitching! - against him. He had felt it once before and again, it was strange and unnatural.

"Umm, more..." came the soft, plaintive moan from Kaname. Zero shook his head and realised Kaname didn't see that. He gave the pureblood a shake instead.

"Kaname, you're - uh, you know," he grumbled. Kaname's eyes blinked open hazily at Zero's rather put out tone. He saw the grim look on the hunter's face and the rather pointed way he was looking down. Kaname glanced down himself and could have cried in frustration. He had forgotten!

"I... s-sorry," he mumbled breathlessly.

Zero gave a non-commital grunt and shrug. He could feel his face was still hot. Kaname chanced another peep at Zero and his still thudding heart sank at the scowl that said Zero wasn't at all happy right now. The hunter's eyes slid away. He didn't feel like drinking anymore. It was one thing to offer a brotherly hug, it was an altogether different thing to feel something that wasn't at all brotherly. Of course there was another reason why Zero didn't want them glued from neck to hip. He would probably die of shame if he one day forgot to control his own body and started displaying the same evidence of arousal regardless of how inevitable or even expected it might be. It would be a betrayal of his love for Yuuki, no matter how Kaname tried to insist it was a natural reaction. How could it possibly be natural if Zero had never even looked at another female other than Yuuki? She had truly been the most desirable woman in the world to him all these years. He couldn't imagine another soul more beautiful, adorable or desirable. Zero steadfastly ignored the taunting voice in his head that was now trying to voice out a name. No. As far as Zero was concerned, there was no one who could take Yuuki's place. Ever.

But Kaname on the other hand...

With a twinge of guilt in his heart, Zero glanced at the very disappointed looking pureblood. He couldn't very well fault Kaname for this but he didn't know what else to say either. After a sigh, Zero bent his head once more and started licking the wounds on Kaname's neck closed. They were already healing but Zero cleaned off the bloodstains on the creamy skin with his tongue, feeling even guiltier about cutting the session short. Kaname stood docilely within the circle of Zero's arms, miserably nursing a pang of regret that this session had ended so soon. It shouldn't have ... it should have lasted for an hour at least... he should have been more careful to keep his lower body away from Zero's... Kaname's throat was tight with regret. He promised himself that he would extra careful the next time Zero bit him. They still had the rest of the weekend. He would give Zero a bit of time but come this evening... yes, Kaname told himself determinedly. He would get Zero to bite him again... somehow... and he vowed that the hunter would find no excuse to cut it short this time.

When the slow, careful strokes of Zero's tongue ceased, Kaname finally looked up, his hands still curled around Zero's broad shoulders. The hunter's face was glowing with the pure blood he had ingested but he still looked a little embarrassed as he quickly licked his lips clean, his gaze not quite meeting Kaname's.

"Well, you - uh, need to...?" he muttered, jerking his head in a subtle movement towards the attached bathroom. His eyes slid again to the bulge in Kaname's pants and then quickly darted away.

"I'll go take a shower," Kaname murmured and reluctantly let go of Zero whom he knew was avoiding looking at him. Kaname hurried into the bathroom, feeling aroused, flustered and regretful. It wasn't as if he could hide how he felt... and in any case, a part of him didn't want to. He didn't want to hide anything from Zero. It wasn't typical pureblood behaviour of course, but it was only for Zero. When it came to his beloved hunter, Kaname just wanted to give him everything... his love... his passion... his body. But it was too early.

Kaname shut the bathroom door quietly and turned to lean against it, running trembling hands down his face. It was still too early. He gave a despairing sigh that sounded almost like a sob. It was much too early. Kaname wrapped his arms around himself, swallowing hard. He couldn't... no, he wouldn't expect Zero to forget about Yuuki so soon. It was only right that he let the hunter grieve for her properly and in his own time. Kaname would never want to force Zero - ever. He knew that or at least his head did but his heart was another matter altogether, having waited for so long.

_Dear God, please... how much longer do I have to wait? _

- Chapter End -


	17. Chapter 17: The Setback

**Author Notes: **Hello again! _-is suffering from headache, cold, scratchy throat and bloodshot eyes- _But still, the show must go on no matter what! LOL talk about dramatics! Thank you so much as always - your kind reviews made me dig for minutes here and there so here is the next chapter. Sorry for the typos that I'm sure are in there, will get to them in a day or two. In the meantime, enjoy...

- Chapter Start -

For the next minute or so, Zero remained right where he was in Kaname's room. The only difference was that his hands were now shoved into his jeans pockets and he was frowning at the closed bathroom door. He couldn't really hear anything but there was no mistaking Kaname's disappointment, so palpable he could almost feel it in the air. What he _could _feel now was the same familiar twinge of guilt twisting in his heart. Kaname probably didn't realise it but the funny thing was, he wasn't the only one disappointed. Zero had looked forward to biting him again - he wasn't lying when he said he could hardly concentrate on the news. He wasn't disappointed at first either - Kaname's reactions had been as appealing as before and Zero had enjoyed himself holding the pureblood in his arms and delighting in that pale neck right at his lips.

Then of course, he had overreacted - again.

Now, he was suffering from familiar pangs of guilt and soon it would be followed by the need to apologise - so what else was new?

Zero exhaled and spent the next few moments cursing under his breath with his eyes squeezed shut. Then he swung around and stalked out of Kaname's room, raking his fingers through his hair and giving the silky strands a good tug to relieve his feelings. The next thing he knew, he was in the kitchen with no memory of having walked there.

_Again!_

Zero gave a small growl of sheer frustration as his feet carried him right up to the kitchen sink. He looked down into one of the still wet stainless steel basins, uneasily aware that he was still fretting about how Kaname must be feeling now. Zero had known how his bite would affect Kaname so why the hell did he let it bother him so much? Was it simply because he didn't like the idea of someone else other than Yuuki finding his bite sensual and arousing? But surely that had to be much, much better than having a donor who was terrified of you, right? Then why had he stopped so soon? Zero stubbornly asked himself those questions even though he already knew the answers.

The main reason was because Kaname was a man. Zero knew that but feeling another male's hard erection pressing against his still left him a little... squeamish. It wasn't right. It wasn't! And besides... Zero felt his face flush. He knew that if he had continued biting Kaname and forgot to rein in his own emotions, he too might be similarly affected, might even - God forbid! - exhibit the same shameful display of arousal as Kaname had. So far, that was only a theory since Zero had only gotten aroused while drinking from Yuuki, never from Kaname. Of course, the fact that he was almost always either injured or distracted while drinking from the latter probably played a part.

Still, it was a mortifying thought. Zero's flush deepened as he imagined Kaname giving him the same accusing sort of look he had given the pureblood earlier. It would be no less than he deserved but Zero was sure he would probably die of shame anyway. Therefore, it was imperative that he not lose himself completely to the sensual, vampiric delights of blood drinking. Kaname was the helpless one when it came to this so Zero reasoned that it fell to his lot to be the one in control. He had to be particularly careful because of how willing his donor was.

Even from that first time so many years ago, there had never been any admonishment from Kaname to be careful, to not take too much, to not make a mess, to be properly respectful and humble, to be down-on-your-knees grateful - nothing. _Nada. _There had only been inhumanly swift responses in coming to his aid, little or no explanations required, very controlled tremors, gracious 'you're welcome's and easy smiles that took away the awkwardness.

But now it was different. There were the more obvious trembles, the verbal pleas to take more and not stop, the shy confessions about how welcome his bite was, the aching vulnerability in those expressive, dark eyes that got to Zero each time and the knowledge of the sheer lengths the pureblood had gone to to get what he wanted. And finally, the irrefutable proof of Kaname's words - just in case all of the above weren't enough - the honest reaction of his body, cementing once and for all how Kaname craved his bite.

Zero gave an involuntary shiver and rested his hands at the edge of the kitchen sink, his head hanging low and his cheeks pulsing hot at the thought of that male hardness pressing against him. It wasn't Kaname's fault he got aroused but it wasn't his either. Perhaps... Zero looked up unseeingly at the kitchen drapes. Perhaps they just needed to be more careful, that was all. Surely there had to be a way for him to give Kaname what he wanted without being reminded too obviously of how it affected him? Zero took a deep breath, turning this thought over in his mind. Slowly, he nodded to himself. Yes, he could do that. It could be something as simple as a change in position, in fact. It also looked like he owed Kaname another apology, this time for cutting the session short. Still, Zero promised himself he would bite him again later on and this time, do a proper job of it. He was determined that Kaname would find nothing to complain about this time.

- o -

Kaname came out of his room some twenty minutes later, dressed in a clean shirt and feeling calm and composed once more. He found Zero in the living room talking on his handphone.

"Why? Worried that your papa can't take care of himself?" Zero was asking. Kaname was pleasantly surprised to hear the teasing note in the hunter's voice; it wasn't long ago that he sounded like he detested phone calls, when he sounded like he would never smile again. Kaname also knew who Zero was talking to having instantly recognised Yuko's laugh over the phone - she had inherited her mother's infectious giggles.

"Well, since you're bringing a roast duck, I guess you can," Zero said next, sounding as if that was the only reason he cared to have. He chuckled a moment later, echoing Yuko's laugh. They were such innocent words and spoken so lightheartedly... but still more than enough to make Kaname's heart sink to his stomach. He didn't need Hanabusa Aido's brains to deduce that Yuko and likely Tomi and perhaps even the twins were dropping by Cross Academy to see their father for lunch. They should, Kaname knew that. He was glad they loved their father and wanted to see him, he was very glad but-

_Why this weekend?_

Kaname suppressed the petulant complaint the moment it formed in his head. Yuko and the boys had every right to come home to their father whenever they wanted to. In fact, they had more right than he did. Kaname knew Zero needed their support and love no matter how independent and strong he might appear in front of them. For that alone, Kaname felt a wave of shame over his initial reaction. It was petty and selfish. He wasn't a selfish person, not by pureblood standards anyway. He had put aside his own needs for years, he had freely shared that which every vampire craved with Zero. But now when he finally had him all to himself, and Zero seemed to enjoy biting him and when Kaname had planned that the next feeding would go perfectly...

_Why this weekend?_

Kaname bit his lip as the words echoed petulantly through his head again.

"All right, we'll see you this evening then."

Zero set his phone down on the coffee table and turned around. There was a small smile on his lips, making Kaname wonder if he had forgotten their earlier awkwardness.

"Yuko and Tomi are coming this evening. They're looking forward to meeting you again," Zero announced. Kaname was quick to force his frozen lips into something he hoped resembled a smile.

"That's... great. Are the boys coming as well?"

Zero shook his head, looking a bit regretful.

"Nope, maybe next time," he replied. "Yuko's bringing lunch so I don't even have to cook anything."

He folded his arms across his chest, pretending to look offended. "Does everyone think I can't cook anymore? First you show up at my doorstep with a mountain of food and now it's Yuko's turn!"

Kaname tried another smile, a more successful one this time. He was sure Zero had never cooked a bad dish in his life and could still recall the late Cross singing praises of his son's culinary skills, happily aware that they surpassed his own.

"I'm sure they just didn't want you to go to any trouble. So - they're just joining us for lunch?"

Zero shook his head, sending Kaname's hopes crashing down even further.

"No, they're staying the night and only leaving tomorrow evening... about the same time as you, actually."

_But - but that's the entire weekend!_

Kaname's shoulders almost slumped. He quickly dropped his gaze before Zero saw the crushing disappointment he was sure was mirrored clearly in his eyes.

"That's great, Zero. I'm looking forwad to seeing Yuko again and Tomi too, of course," he added with as much enthusiasm as he could muster, his voice sounding horribly wooden to his ears.

"Yeah, at least you won't be bored with only me for company!" Zero quipped before turning towards the dining room. "Luckily I have some lettuce and cherry tomatoes. I think I'll make a salad to go with that duck..."

Kaname had nothing to add to that, he felt as if he was suffocating in disappointment and could hardly breathe, let alone think of a coherent reply. A few steps later, Zero paused to look over his shoulder. Kaname didn't seem as enthusiastic over his only niece's visit as he had thought which was strange, since Yuko held a special place in his heart. Zero took in the slight droop to Kaname's graceful shoulders and his smile faded. Now he remembered what he owed the pureblood - a perfectly executed biting session that would be long enough to satisfy even Kaname... but how could they do this with two other people in the house? The annoying voice in Zero's head head piped up at that very moment, echoing each word of his promise right back at him.

_All right, all right! As if I could forget..._

Zero sighed and turned around again.

"Hey, Kaname?"

The pureblood looked up automatically and had to swiftly mask his feelings when observant amethyst eyes searched his features closely, their owner walking back to him.

"You all right?"

Kaname nodded mutely. He didn't miss the very swift glance Zero directed at his hips before looking up at him again, a faintly embarrassed look on his face.

"Look, what happened earlier..."

This time, self preservation came to Kaname's aid. He was a pureblood, for Heaven's sake! Besides, how could he begrudge Zero's children from visiting him? There wasn't anything he could do about it except once again play his usual gracious and accomodating self even though he had never felt more like - like throwing a tantrum, complete with kicking furniture, stamping feet, clenching fists and screaming himself red in the face. Such a tantrum would probably destroy Zero's home though, Kaname realised. At times, being a pureblood sucked...

Gathering his impeccable control around him like a familiar cloak, Kaname raised his head proudly and met Zero's searching gaze unflinchingly.

"I'm fine, Zero. You don't have to -"

Zero smiled and shook his head only once and that was all it took for Kaname to falter.

"Kaname, please - let me finish. I apologise for stopping so soon," Zero said, his words sounding a bit stiff. "I know you didn't mean to - uh, but well, I still want to bite you," he added. Kaname stared at him, fixated on the slight flush on Zero's cheeks, aware that stupid, _stupid _hope was once again soaring through the thick cloud of disappointment still threatening to suffocate him. The way Zero was looking at him now... as if there was no other person in the world... Kaname swallowed and nodded, not even trusting himself to say a word.

"As soon as Yuko and Tomi leave, all right?" Zero promised, his voice now slightly husky with embarrassment but his honest gaze still resting on Kaname's face. The pureblood had to swallow again, his throat having swelled with emotion.

"I... for how long this time?" he whispered, hating himself for sounding so pathetic. To his relief and wonder, Zero only smiled again, a slow and absolutely heartstopping smile that made Kaname's heart skip a beat before racing on at top speed.

"Until it's time for you to leave," Zero whispered back, a hint of that mischevious twinkle in his eyes. "Or pass out," he added absently. Kaname simply nodded again, his somewhat hazy brain making a frantic note somewhere to tell Akira to come later. Much, much later.

"Thank you, Zero," he murmured almost shyly and that made Zero blink before he frowned.

"Don't thank me, Kaname," he muttered, sounding bit exasperated. "I'm the lucky one, remember?"

Kaname smiled, not even caring that it felt shaky even to him. He didn't want to argue with Zero but the hunter was wrong. Abolutely wrong. Zero reached out to clap Kaname on the shoulder before turning around again.

"I'll go make that salad," he threw over his shoulder. "Why don't you go catch some sleep? I'm going to bed myself in a while, it's getting hot."

"All right," Kaname whispered and obediently did as Zero asked.

- o -

Yuko and Tomi arrived at Cross Academy about an hour after sunset, their journey made possible only by the heavily tinted windows on their car. By this time, Kaname had had a good rest and more than enough time to pull himself together. He was still disappointed but Zero had made him a promise and Kaname held it close to his heart. Besides, he was genuinely fond of Yuko and she adored him in return. Yuko had inherited Zero's unusual colouring and her mother's sweet features. She had been a friendly, talkative child and a rather bossy older sister to her brothers but had since grown into a thoughtful and kind woman. In Kaname and Zero's besotted eyes, her beauty was second only to Yuuki's.

There was a genuine smile on Kaname's face as he stepped out the front door with Zero and watched the hunter greet Yuko and Tomi, the former with a long close hug and the latter with a warm handshake. Then it was Kaname's turn - he too, hugged and kissed his only niece and shook Tomi's hand just as cordially. It was Zero's turn to watch and he smiled at Tomi who never failed to amuse him by flushing and bowing to Kaname despite the pureblood telling him not to each time. Seeing Kaname plant an unreserved and noisy kiss on Yuko's cheek caused a strange pang in Zero's heart. Surely he should be pleased - it showed that his regal brother-in-law wasn't shy about showing his affections to his other relatives, right?

Zero resolutely pushed that strange thought out of his head and ignored the annoying voice that was jabbering something at him again. Instead, he went to the car to help unload the food. Other than the roast duck, the young couple had also brought Chinese fried rice, a nice bottle of merlot and even a quart of butter pecan ice-cream, thoughtfully provided by Yuko who remembered her uncle's sweet tooth. When Zero saw the wine, he turned to Kaname with a raised eyebrow and the pureblood smiled back at him. This time though, Zero was careful to drink sparingly.

Lunch was a cheerful enough meal and the roast duck was delicious - the skin golden brown, thin and crispy, the meat underneath tasty and succulent. Kaname at most of it without tasting, drinking his fill of the handsome hunter who sat opposite him, apparently oblivious to his besotted gaze. It was a few moments before Kaname realised with no small amount of shock that he was being watched and turned his head sharply to see Yuko looking at him. There was a swiftly masked curious look in her round amethyst eyes that made Kaname want to squirm in his seat. He gave her a quick smile, she returned it and they both resumed eating again.

Yuko and Tomi were careful not to mention Yuuki but it was Zero who brought her up a few minutes later, casually mentioning that Kaname had accompanied him to the cemetary that morning. Yuko frowned at the way her father said that.

"Have you been going there every morning, Papa?" she asked carefully. Zero smiled and nodded calmly, taking a sip of his wine.

"Every morning," he replied with a faint note of pride in his voice. He thought it prudent not to mention the two days last weekend when he had followed Kaname on that business trip. Yuko gave a sad smile, her eyes darting momentarily to Tomi's.

"I miss her too, Papa," she said softly, reaching out to squeeze her father's hand. "But you don't have to go there each morning, right? Kaname-ojii-san is here, why don't you take him to town tomorrow? We can all go, I'm longing to have a sundae at Sweet Treats!"

Along with her laugh, Yuko had also inherited her mother's love for sweets. Zero turned his hand up and squeezed Yuko's hand in return, his smile turning wistful.

"I know, Yuko... but there's nowhere else I'd rather be," he murmured. Kaname put down his fork, the sudden lump in his throat preventing him from swallowing his food.

"Besides, Kaname wanted to go as well," Zero added, glancing up at the pureblood who quickly nodded his head.

"I'm glad I did," he murmured with another quick smile at Yuko. Tomi refrained from saying anything, his round blue eyes darting between the two men. Kaname Kuran had proved to be a far more approachable pureblood than others but Tomi knew his place and would never dream of overstepping his boundaries despite his father being one of Kaname's most trusted nobles. Yuko gave a shrug and a smile.

"I want to visit Mama too. We'll go with you tomorrow, Papa, OK?" she said tremulously, glancing at Tomi who immediately nodded his agreement.

"We'll all go," he chimed in. Zero looked again at Kaname who nodded. He had himself well in control now.

"All four of us," he agreed.

- o -

After the meal, Yuko dished out ice-cream for the four of them and later insisted on doing the washing up. Tomi had brought a DVD of the latest blockbuster movie and the four of them spent the next two hours relaxing in front of the TV. Tomi and Yuko sat next to each other on the sofa with Zero occupying one of the armchairs on the side. Kaname sat opposite Zero, only half concentrating on the movie. He was far more interested in sneaking glances at the hunter who appeared absorbed in the fast moving action on the TV. Kaname's control over his expression and body language was usually impeccable but perhaps because he was in the Chairman's quarters - a place he considered home, he was unaware of Yuko's increasingly curious gaze turning towards him now and again.

Yuko had seen the movie before and with her taste running more towards romance than action, found herself glancing at her father and her beloved uncle instead from time to time. They both were, after all, very easy on the eyes - much better looking than the hero in the movie. It wasn't long before she noticed how Kaname's eyes kept returning to her father instead of remaining riveted to the screen the way Tomi's was. Yuko's mind absently pondered on this as she looked back at the TV screen, where an exciting and rather over the top car chase was going on. A minute or so later, she glanced sideways at Kaname once more. Yes, he was still peeping at her father. This made Yuko chew on her lower lip thoughtfully. The first couple of times this had happened during lunch, she thought she was simply imagining things. Then she decided that Kaname-ojii-san was probably worried about how her father was holding up. A few minutes later, she doubted that was the sole reason and began to suspect that it had something to do with the taboo feeding sessions the two of them had shared over the years - it was the only real link they had between them.

Now, Yuko began to wonder if it could be something else. Something deeper than mere concern or a shared secret. She didn't know what to think of it. It had to be only her imagination but there was no mistaking the brief flashes of soft yearning she could see in her uncle's dark eyes. A hopeless sort of yearning one would never imagine a pureblood to exhibit so openly even if he was unaware of it. Could it be... no, of course not! Yuko absolutely refused to believe what her eyes were trying to tell her - that her beloved Kaname-ojii-san was - for some strange reason - staring at her father as if - no, it _was _ridiculous! Tomi would say with that aggravatingly patient air of his that she had read too many of those sappy romance novels and gotten her brain mixed up. For good.

Yuko tried resolutely to put it out of her mind but barely two minutes later, she was again sneaking glances her uncle. He was looking at the TV this time but before Yuko could tell herself that she had been dreaming, his eyes flicked over to Zero. Again, she saw that strange look of yearning flash in his eyes. Yuko closed her eyes briefly, feeling confused and uneasy as a mad giggle tried to escape her throat.

Her beloved Kaname-ojii-san was for some strange reason attracted to her father.

Her _father_.

But why? And since when? And _why_, for goodness' sake? Yuko bit her lip and crossed her arms, getting more and more vexed by the minute as she stared at the screen without taking in a word of what anyone was saying. She had to be dreaming, she had to! Her parents had the best kind of marriage in the world, the kind that made other people sigh and wish that their own marriage was the same or that they would have the same sort of happiness one day. But like her mother, Yuko had often wondered about her uncle's apparent loneliness. She hardly knew anything about his private life, only that he didn't seem to have anyone else but them in it. What she did know was how her beloved uncle's fatigue just seemed to fall off his shoulders the moment he stepped into their house and how his dark eyes would light up as if he was genuinely glad to finally be home where he belonged. Yuko, like her parents and brothers, had always been fiercely proud of that and welcomed her uncle each time he visited but she had thought that it was because he didn't have a family of his own.

Now, she couldn't help wondering if it was more than just being with his sister's family... if there was one particular person in their household her uncle had been drawn to over the years, only that none of them - certainly not her honest and upfront father - had ever noticed. Yuko glanced sideways at her husband and found his eyes still riveted to TV, now showing a tense dialogue between the hero and his enemy. She honestly didn't know what to make of this. Perhaps she had read too much romantic nonsense after all.

- o -

The next morning, the four of them went to the cemetary, Yuko carrying a bunch of white and pink daisies and Tomi - who had inherited his father's love of sleeping - marching alongside her and manfully acting as if getting up early in the morning was something he did everyday. This time, it was Kaname who felt just a bit out of place. He found himself lagging behind as the other three went on ahead. Seeing Zero with his daughter and his son-in-law reminded Kaname that despite the genuine and very warm welcome he got whenever he visited Cross Academy, he was still not quite part of this family. He was Yuuki's older brother but with her gone now, it felt as if the link that made them family had somehow... disappeared. Perhaps he was just being silly and paranoid but Kaname retreated to the shade of the nearest tree and waited there instead, leaving Zero, Yuko and Tomi at Yuuki's grave. Tomi gave a couple of glances towards Kaname but he didn't walk over. Kaname was glad he didn't... he wasn't in the mood to play genial pureblood right now, not when he was still longing for the most of today to already be over. To Kaname's surprised pleasure, Zero came over after a few minutes and the pureblood chastised himself when he couldn't hold back his pleased smile.

"You all right?" Zero asked quietly as he stopped beside Kaname. The pureblood nodded, feeling a well of nonsensical happiness bubbling up inside of him at the hunter's proximity. Zero gave him a searching glance.

"You've been very quiet this morning," he remarked. Kaname quelled the bubbles inside him and raised an elegant eyebrow.

"Have I ever struck you as the chatty type?" he asked dryly. Zero shook his head and shot a glance at Yuko and Tomi before turning back to Kaname, a strangely secretive look on his face.

"Yuko just told me that she and Tomi have changed their minds and are going off earlier this evening, around half past seven," he said quietly. Kaname's eyes lit up and he smiled happily.

"Really?"

"Yup, so we'll be able to - well, you know... you can get that long session you wanted," Zero replied softly, almost mumbling his words. There was a slight flush to his cheeks and Kaname stared at him, entranced. Then he smiled again.

"A very long session, Zero. I told Akira to come two hours later," Kaname said calmly. Yuko had been secretively looking at the two men under the tree out of the corner of her eyes and she knew the exact moment her father told Kaname the news. It only confirmed her suspicions while making her more uneasy at the same time. Tomi on the other hand was completely startled to hear Zero's laughter ringing out in the quiet cemetary and swung around just in time to see his father-in-law punch a smiling Kaname Kuran in the shoulder.

- o -

_Almost twelve hours later..._

After having an early breakfast in town at the Sweet Treats cafe, Yuko and Tomi dropped Kaname and Zero back at Cross Academy with Zero grumbling that he didn't see how anyone could call having two chocolate covered sundaes 'breakfast'. The young couple then left with a still warm chocolate cake resting on the backseat, Zero's thanks for the roast duck.

The two older vampires waved Yuko and Tomi off before going back in. As soon as Zero closed the door and turned around, he wasn't surprised to find Kaname staring at him, not bothering to hide the shy longing in his eyes. Zero shook his head ruefully but he was smiling as he walked towards the pureblood.

"Now, Kaname?" he asked softly and the pureblood nodded eagerly. Zero took a step closer and that was when his handphone rang. They both froze at the soft beep. Zero sighed as he fished the offending item from out of his back pocket. He frowned when he saw the name and looked up at Kaname whose expectant look had changed to one of wariness. Zero mouthed 'Sorry' to him before turning around and pressing the 'Receive' button on his phone.

"Kiryuu here."

- o -

The duration of the call was only two minutes but its effect on Kaname was profound. Both vampires were silent after Zero hung up. The hunter didn't need to explain anything; he kept the volume low but Kaname was close enough to hear the voice at the other end. Two Level Es had been discovered going on a rampage in a town about fifty kilometres away. Unfortunately, most of the hunters at the HA were either already out on other missions or on well deserved breaks.

"My apologies, Kiryuu-san. I know you officially still have one more day of leave left but with only three rookie hunters around..."

"I understand."

"... and well, you did have a-"

"It's OK, I understand," Zero repeated firmly. Kaname felt his aching heart thud right down to the floor. The irrational question of 'Why now?' was echoing around his mind but again, there was no help for having the worst luck in the world... was there?

"I've rested long enough. Anymore and I might get rusty," Zero replied. There was a pause and another hesitant apology but Zero brushed it off with his usual honesty.

"Thank you. It's fine. Just give me a few minutes to get my gear. I'll be at the HA in -" Zero paused to check his wristwatch, "... in half an-"

He looked up at Kaname and stopped in mid sentence. Kaname quickly shook his head and smoothed out his expression but Zero glanced again at his watch, the genuine regret on his face making Kaname feel just a tiny, tiny bit better.

"I'll be at the HA in forty five minutes' time," Zero said firmly, his eyes still on the silent pureblood. "You can give me the details when I get there, OK? Bye."

Zero pushed his phone back in his pocket, frowning. As soon as he opened his mouth though, Kaname beat him to it.

"Don't apologise, Zero," he murmured. "This isn't your fault."

Zero smiled wryly. "But the timing stinks, doesn't it?"

Kaname shrugged and nodded, too disappointed to even think of a witty comeback. Then he sighed and pulled himself together.

"You need to get ready," he said quietly. He would go with Zero if the hunter allowed it... which he never had. Zero looked down for a moment. It wasn't his fault and yet... he was again feeling guilty towards Kaname. Yet no matter how reluctant he felt at leaving the pureblood, he couldn't delay on this mission. Every minute spent here was putting the public at risk. Zero knew that, it had been drilled into him since young but the forlorn look on Kaname's face rooted him to the spot. He... didn't want to leave the pureblood.

Kaname was looking at the coffee table, at the sofa, anywhere but at Zero. He had told Akira to come at two in the morning and now felt very foolish, having now obtained a total six hours of free time and nothing to fill it with. Zero would be leaving soon and there was no point in staying here any further.

"Hey, if you want, we can still-" Zero started but Kaname shook his head and turned away.

"It's OK, Zero. You need to get ready. I - I'll call Akira to come earlier, he's probably in town already."

The jovial driver had been known to while away his time at the Sweet Treats cafe in town as well. Kaname swung around suddenly to look straight at Zero, his dark eyes haunted.

"Just... be careful, OK?" he whispered.

_I get scared each time you go on a mission but now that I... please, Zero, be careful._

Zero nodded. He was touched by Kaname's concern and at the same time, a little uneasy. Kaname had never said anything like this to him before - it was usually Yuuki's job to worry.

"Why?" he asked with a lifted eyebrow. "Are you going to sic more 'Es on me?"

Zero had only said that as a joke, as a way to ease the strange awkwardness between them. He thought that it would even reassure Kaname that he was OK with what the pureblood had done in the past. To his consternation, Kaname inhaled sharply and even took a step back as if Zero had hit him. His dark eyes widened in distress.

"No!" he protested. "No, of course I won't!"

Zero's eyebrows went up. He quickly raised a placating hand.

"Easy, Kaname," he soothed. "I was only-"

He broke off when Kaname took a step closer to him and reached out, placing shaking hands on Zero's shoulders, his face pale with shock, his dark eyes earnest and intent.

"Zero, believe me," he begged. "Please believe me. I know I used to - but I won't ever now."

Zero nodded. He _did _believe Kaname, he was only joking. Or attempting to, since it was obvious his audience thought he meant it.

_Stupid joke, not even funny..._

"Zero, you must believe me," Kaname murmured, looking almost on the verge of tears. Perhaps he would have taken Zero's joke in the light hearted way the hunter meant it but after suffering two successive setbacks that had delayed Zero's next bite and then for the hunter to remind him of his shameful acts in the past just when he was feeling so horribly crushed...

Kaname felt again the combined, suffocating weight of all the accumulated guilt over the years heaped one on top of the other inside him, each damned time he gave into his weakness and lured more Es to where Zero was... all for the sake of getting what he craved.

_Stupid, selfish craving..._

"It's OK, Kaname. I was just... oh, hush," Zero implored, deeply regretting that he had made that stupid joke in the first place. He hadn't quite realised Kaname's guilt ran _that _deep, that he felt _that _bad about his actions. He should have realised.

"It's OK," Zero whispered. "It was just a joke."

Kaname wrapped his arms around himself. He was shaking almost violently but he forced himself to lift his head so that he could meet Zero's eyes.

"Zero, I swear to you, I will never again do that again - never! Please believe me!" he begged, the words coming out rushed and shaky. Zero nodded quickly, his throat swelling with emotion.

"I do, Kaname," he said earnestly, his voice husky. "I believe you. Please - please don't..."

Kaname nodded once, tightly. He half turned away, releasing one hand to half cover his face.

"I hated myself each time I drew those Es there," he murmured. "If you only knew... how desperate I was, how I felt each time you said you didn't need to feed..." He lowered his hand and wrapped it around himself again. The trembles shaking him were getting worse. He hated letting Zero see him like this, so desperate, so needy and pathetic but then again, Zero was the only one who could make him like this whether deliberately or not. Zero's heart gave a squeeze so hard he almost gasped out loud. He could no longer turn away from Kaname when he was like this. No, not even if his life depended on it.

"Come here," Zero said gruffly. He took two large strides forward and grabbed hold of Kaname's arm, swinging him around almost roughly. When Kaname only looked up at him with a soft gasp, Zero cursed and pulled the pureblood into his arms, holding him as tightly as he could.

"Forget what I said, Kaname," he said huskily, pressing fervent kisses onto the dark silky hair and not caring what Kaname thought of his actions. "I want to forget so - so you do that too, all right? I don't ever want to talk about that again."

Kaname nodded as he buried his face in Zero's broad shoulder, hands clutching desperately at the back of Zero's T-shirt. He was perilously, mortifyingly close to tears but not caring what Zero thought of him. Zero gave him a little shake while still holding him tightly.

"Promise me, Kaname. Promise me that you'll forget all about that," he demanded in a fierce whisper. It had come as such a shock to learn of the part Kaname had played in his past missions but in the relatively short space of time, Zero had somehow become reconciled to Kaname's actions and right now, he wanted nothing more than to comfort the shaking pureblood in his arms. Nothing mattered more than that. Kaname nodded again, almost choking on the mortifying sobs he was trying to keep down.

"I p-promise. I... thank you, Zero," he whispered. They held onto each other, Zero all the while aware of the relentless ticking of time as he hushed and soothed Kaname. When the shivers had lessened somewhat, Zero released him reluctantly.

"You all right now?" he asked softly. Kaname nodded, not quite daring to look up. He didn't want Zero to see him like this, such a miserable mess with his eyelashes spiky and his face flushed. Kaname was unaware that far from showing expected disgust at this uncharacteristically weak sight of him, Zero was actually looking at him with a tender look in his eyes. He wished fervently that it wasn't yet time for him to go yet. He wished that the HA hadn't called him, had called anyone else but him. He wished that Kaname could stay here for a couple more days and get all the biting, hugs and attention he craved and all the home cooked food he could eat.

"I have to go get ready," Zero whispered reluctantly, bitter regret filling his heart. It was ridiculous since he would only be gone a day or two at the most - why on earth was he acting as if he was jetting off on a month long trip? Kaname nodded obediently and stepped back but a second later, he caught at Zero's arm.

"Zero, when you finish your mission," he started breathlessly, his heart beating quickly inside his chest. "You will have a couple of days' leave after each mission, won't you?"

Zero nodded silently. Kaname moistened his lips with the tip of his tongue, once again capturing Zero's attention.

"When you finish your mission, come stay with me," Kaname invited huskily. "We can go to my country villa up in the mountains... or - or anywhere you like."

Zero regarded him in silence and Kaname bit his lip, feeling his fragile confidence crumble. And then oh wonders of wonders, the edges of Zero's lips twitched and he looked down, shaking his head. Why did he feel like Kaname had read his mind once again? Well, grab it! whispered that sly voice in his head. It's what you wanted, isn't it? To take care of Kaname?

How on earth could he forget? thought Zero dryly. He looked at the hopeful pureblood and knew that come hell or high water, nothing was going to make him say no.

"And why is that, Kaname?" he asked instead. This time, the tender look in his eyes was echoed by the equally tender note in his voice. Kaname's heart melted and soared at the same time.

"For a change of scene," he managed to reply back. But the real answer he let show in his eyes and knew that Zero could read it as well as if he had said it out loud.

_Because I don't want to be alone. Not anymore._

- Chapter End -


	18. Chapter 18: The Anticipation

**Author Notes:** Hello everyone and Happy Valentine's Day! It's probably past that for some of you (myself included) but hopefully still counts. Thank you again for your wonderful reviews, alerts and favourites. I wish I could write faster to thank you all but a monthly update is the best I can do right now. My apologies, the action I mentioned to some of you will only appear in the next chapter. Hopefully, I'll post that one before too long. In the meantime, enjoy this one...

- Chapter Start -

Zero heaved a weary sigh as he trudged to the doorstep of his house. It was almost midnight. The Headmistress of Cross Academy would have long since left the Chairman's quarters for her own home. In the distance, Zero could see the dimly lit classrooms, signaling that the Night Class lessons were going on as usual. He only gave the building a cursory glance. His days as one of the two School Guardians seemed a lifetime ago... the mere thought was enough to make the same sorrowful ache of his loss tug at his heart.

_I miss you so much, dearest._

Zero thought about Yuuki constantly but mostly once he had dropped onto the bed of whichever nameless hotel he happened to be staying at. He had thought about her every single night for the past one week just like he had done for the weeks prior to that. The knife sharp edge of grief had blurred just a little with the passing of two months but of course he still missed her very, very much.

Zero sighed again as he inserted the key into his front door lock. He was bone tired and dirty. He wanted nothing more than to shuffle to his bedroom and crash into bed just as he was. Instead, he dropped his knapsack by the front door, kicked off his boots and made his way to the bathroom. He badly needed a hot thorough shower before he did anything else. The rumbling of his tummy reminded him that he would get no sleep either unless he fed it first. Hoping he had some food in the fridge that was still edible, Zero stripped off his clothes and dropped it in a corner of the bathroom before stepping into the shower stall.

Catching and terminating the two Level Es who were creating havoc had indeed taken only a few hours as Zero had predicted but as soon as he returned to the HA to submit his report, he had immediately been drafted for another mission with more apologies. A new report of more attacks had just come in from another town about a hundred kilometres away. This mission took a couple of days to complete since the Es were adept at covering their tracks despite losing themselves to blood lust. Right after that, Zero returned to the HA where he found he now had to accompany two rookie hunters on their first hunt. At that point, the HA had offered to shift the task to someone else since a couple of other senior hunters had already returned to duty. However, Zero realised by the first mission itself that he had already taken too long a break - there was a moment when one of the E's dirty claws had come within half an inch of tearing his shoulder open. That close call was a sign that it was time he got back into more active duty so he didn't complain about being given the second mission... or even the third.

Zero could still recall the early days when he had gone on his first hunt while still in school. He knew the difference it made to know that one had a skilled and experienced hunter guarding one's back. He remembered how grateful he had felt to have his late sensei accompanying him on some of the more difficult missions. If nothing else, Zero owed it to the late Touga Yagari to offer the same support the younger hunters needed in turn.

As a senior hunter, Zero had his own hotel room while the two younger hunters shared twin accommodations. Zero joined them for meals when he would go over their plans and made sure everyone knew what they were supposed to do but other than that, kept pretty much to himself. He was usually approachable and amiable enough but not at this time. His younger colleagues gave him the privacy he wanted, knowing about his recent loss. What they didn't know what that it wasn't only Yuuki who filled his thoughts with longing but someone else... someone who haunted his dreams every night when he tried to get some rest, his body weary enough but his mind too alert for sleep.

Kaname Kuran.

Zero was exasperated at how quickly his thoughts would, right after dwelling on Yuuki, inevitably fly to her elder brother. His mind would then insist on replaying the last emotion-filled ten minutes of Kaname's visit when he had almost broken down after Zero's ill-timed joke had backfired on both of them. That memory would inevitably make Zero shift uncomfortably in his bed as his heart ached with a mixture of guilt at the pain he had caused... and awe that he had the power to render such a powerful and respected being helpless and in need of his comfort, his arms. He didn't quite know what to do about the awe but the guilt was easy enough to assuage; he had promised to spend a few days with Kaname at that country villa of his.

Zero had never been there before but had no doubt it was a gorgeous and luxurious retreat, most likely boasting a spectacular view and every possible amenity known to man. Or vampire. He ignored a lingering sense of unease that he was once again going to be spending time alone with Kaname. The last time he had accompanied the pureblood, he had had three shocks one after another. A part of him couldn't help wondering what he would learn on this visit.

Still, it sounded like a nice change, Zero mused absently to himself as he scrubbed himself down in the shower, his pale toned body now covered with fragrant soapsuds. The last place he wanted to go to was somewhere 'touristy', commercialised and crowded. He preferred somewhere closer to nature, somewhere quiet and private and most importantly, devoid of painful memories of his loss. He wanted a place where he could sleep in for as long as he wanted and lounge about doing nothing all day or night if that was all he felt like doing. Well... almost all. Despite that lingering sense of unease, a small smile tugged at Zero's lips. Kaname would of course have another agenda and it was one no vampire in their right mind would ever refuse. Zero wouldn't either seeing as how he hadn't fulfilled his promise of giving the pureblood a good, long biting session. This time though, it would all go according to plan. If the plan was still on, that is.

Zero frowned. Kaname hadn't called him or even left any messages on his phone this past week - not a single one. It was precisely what Zero had wanted of course. He had laid down the rules years ago to his family and to Kaname. But this time, it only made him think of the pureblood more, not less. It almost even distracted him. For some reason, Zero missed Kaname's presence more than he had thought he would. He missed his warm smile, his gracious manner and his soft, cultured voice. He missed that powerful controlled presence that had over the years, gotten past his hunter senses without raising any alarm bells. How strange was that? Zero also missed that addictingly sweet scent, that lithe trembling body that fitted so perfectly against his own, that gloriously powerful rich blood he knew he would get nowhere else in the world. Hell, he even missed the exasperating way Kaname would chase him for a bite with those begging, expressive eyes, the kittenish way he would snuggle up to Zero after baring his neck, the almost desperate way he would press against him, almost making the two of them fall backwards...

_In short, everything._

Zero scowled and started scrubbing himself harder, his clean skin now turning a faint shade of pink from the friction combined with the steamy air in the bathroom. He missed the act of feeding from Kaname now that it was free from guilt, now that he knew it gave Kaname pleasure rather than pain and that it didn't behold him to his donor. In fact, the very thought of sinking his fangs into that delectable neck and feeling the resultant shiver was enough to make his fangs throb in remembrance. Zero's hand slowed its frantic scrubbing and he closed his eyes. He knew the difference between missing Kaname and missing Yuuki was that there was something he could do to placate the first ache but nothing he could do about the second. Zero blinked away the familiar burn starting in his eyes. He reached for the tap and rinsed out the bath sponge under the jet of hot water before stepping under the spray and letting it sluice off the suds from his body. He was going to finish his shower and then he was going to call Kaname. The HA had promised him a total of four days off this round.

He intended to put it to good use this time.

- o -

_The following night..._

The familiar limousine slid to a gentle stop, aligning Zero perfectly with the back door. He hadn't expected anything less. Hand halfway out to grasp the door handle, he paused when he saw that Akira was already standing beside him. Zero let him get the door.

"Good evening, Kiryuu-san! Lovely to see you again!" the jovial man greeted him cheerily, executing a polite bow. "Here, let me get that for you," he continued, reaching for Zero's worn duffel bag as he straightened up.

"'Evening, Akira-san. It's OK, I've -" Zero broke off and blinked when he realised his bag had already transferred shoulders. He wasn't sure how that had happened.

"Well, it's good to see you, too," he ended a little lamely as Akira trotted happily to the back of the limo, carrying Zero's bag as if making off with a coveted prize. He opened the boot and carefully deposited the duffel next to an elegant, leather overnight bag even though the disparity between the two was obvious to say the least.

By then, Zero had already slid into the backseat of the limo, breathing in the scent of high quality leather appreciatively. Akira was again just in time to close the door for him. Zero gave up and turned to nod at Kaname who was already turned to face him, his warm smile visible even in the dim light. When Kaname shifted closer, Zero automatically lifted his cheek for the kiss that he just _knew _was coming, his own grin turning slightly embarrassed. He was not disappointed and neither was Kaname who breathed the hunter's beloved scent deep into his lungs as he pressed his lips lovingly to the swiftly warming cheek. The past one week had dragged on like months and he had thrown himself wholeheartedly into his work to distract him from the pangs of missing Zero... and to clear enough work so that he could take a couple more days off. As soon as Akira had stopped the car, Kaname activated the partition that separated the backseat from the front. As far as he was concerned, he had Zero all to himself. His hard won vacation was off to a beautiful start.

"Zero, I have missed you," Kaname murmured, his eyes glowing with a happy warmth he made no attempt to conceal.

"Yeah, right," Zero mumbled, trying without much success to keep from grinning like an idiot. What on earth was wrong with him, he hadn't seen the pureblood for only a week but he was acting as though it had been months! He wasn't the only one either, he could tell from the shy glances Kaname was giving him that the pureblood longed to give him a warmer welcome than just a mere peck on the cheek.

Akira hopped into the driver's seat with the same energy he had displayed earlier. There was nothing in his face or behavior to suggest he had driven two hundred and twenty kilometres just to come to Cross Academy to pick up Zero.

"It's a five hour drive to the villa," Kaname said. "Have you eaten anything?"

"I'm fine, Kaname. Just a little tired."

Kaname immediately looked concerned as he shifted closer.

"Close your eyes and rest then," he murmured. He wouldn't mind if all Zero did was snore beside him for the next few hours. Of course, he had a much better medicine that a mere nap but he knew Zero would not bite him now. Even though the seats they were sitting on now were of the softest leather, Kaname would rather wait for them to have more privacy and a place more comfortable.

_Like a bed..._

Even if he knew it wasn't likely to happen.

- o -

Kaname's country villa was beautiful. It lived up to every bit of Zero's expectation and then some. The villa was situated halfway up the mountain, cleverly built and snugly fitted into the ascending slope, overlooking a breathtaking view of the valley below. The building itself blended nicely with its green surroundings - all browns and russets, warm yellow lighting, lush potted plants and brick coloured flagstone flooring. Even coming up the long winding driveway, the villa looked imposing. It had a total of four floors and was designed with spaciousness in mind. The walkways and a couple of dining areas were open to the surroundings where one could enjoy the beautiful view and refreshing mountain air.

As soon as Kaname and Zero got down from the limo, five staff were on hand to welcome them, including Seiren. She had arrived two hours beforehand to make sure everything was ready for their visit. She greeted Kaname and then Zero in her usual polite but expressionless manner and he nodded to her. The one time he had pulled Bloody Rose on Kaname and found her lethal fingers at his neck a bare instant later seemed also a lifetime ago. In truth, Zero had exchanged hardly more than twenty words with Seiren these past thirty years but they were both resigned to each other's presence by now. In fact, while she never said as much and while he didn't quite know how, Zero knew that he had somehow gained Seiren's trust and approval. In fact, this time he thought he could even detected a faint uplifting of her spirits. She seemed almost cheerful even though she didn't smile. Perhaps it was the fact that her master had finally found time to have a well deserved break away from the office and was with someone she trusted?

"Tea is served in the small living room, Kaname-sama," she said, gesturing to a door halfway down the hall on the right. "I can get a meal for the two of you if you would prefer?"

Kaname shook his head. Knowing Seiren, tea would be more than sufficient.

"Thank you, Seiren. A cup of tea will be fine, it's already dawn."

Seiren bowed and disappeared out the door, no doubt to oversee their luggage. Kaname turned to smile happily at Zero who was looking around him with his hands in his jeans pockets. Kaname was reminded of their past trip when he had also caught the hunter looking around the hotel room but with far less interest compared to now.

"Washroom is through here if you would like to wash your hands first." Kaname waited until Zero had turned around to face him before pointing at the nearest door.

"It looks great, Kaname. You come here often?" Zero asked, walking towards the washroom. Kaname shrugged, the happy smile on his face fading a little.

"A few times," he murmured. "Mostly for meetings. Takuma and Senri like to stay here though... and Hanabusa and Yori too on their wedding anniversaries."

Zero's eyes widened a little at that information. He couldn't recall it right now but they must have mentioned it in passing. For some reason, he felt like apologising although he didn't know why but once again, Kaname beat him to it.

"I'm sorry, Zero," he said softly. "I should have invited you all to stay here before Yuuki... I mean-"

_Before it was too late. Why had I never done that?_

Kaname broke off and squeezed his eyes shut, trying to swallow the tight lump of regret and sorrow in his throat. When a warm hand squeezed his shoulder, he opened his eyes to see a pair of warm amethyst eyes that shared the same sorrow as him.

"There are a lot of things I wish I had done too, Kaname," Zero said softly. "But I'm sure she knows and appreciates all that you've done for her."

_Keeping me alive and sane is one of them._

Kaname raised his hand and squeezed the hand on his shoulder, nodding. It was too late now to do anything for Yuuki but not for Zero. He vowed not to waste another minute of his very long life.

- o -

The small living room turned out to be twice the size of Zero's living room in the Chairman's quarters. The main colour scheme was russet and cream, echoed in the low panelled ceiling, the plump cushions on the armchairs and the cream coloured drapes on the French windows. The decor was comfortable without being cluttered. There were three set of chairs and sofas arranged around low coffee tables. Kaname led the way to the nearest one. The drapes were half closed and Zero could see the sky in the distant horizon starting to lighten.

Seiren's idea of 'tea' proved to be soothing Earl Gray served in beautiful Wedgewood china and silver trays laden with cake, fruit tarts and a selection of chicken, cucumber, egg and cold turkey ham sandwiches.

"This can be classified as a meal, you know."

Zero raised an eyebrow as he eyed the laden coffee table, his stomach rumbling happily in anticipation. Kaname laughed softly as he sat down on the sofa and reached for the teapot.

"Which is good since your stomach has been growling for the past five hours," he teased. "I couldn't sleep a wink..."

"At least I don't snore when I sleep," Zero replied calmly, seating himself in the armchair opposite Kaname who nodded solemnly as he passed him the tea. Of course the hunter didn't and had looked positively angelic while sleeping. Kaname could attest to that; he had spent half the journey staring at Zero and the other half scooting closer to him while staring at him some more.

"For the past two and a half hours then," he amended and motioned to the sandwiches. Zero smiled wryly as he reached for a sandwich. Nothing went past a pureblood, apparently.

"Well, on behalf of my noisy stomach, I apologise for disrupting your rest," he apologised loftily, the effect somewhat ruined by having to mumble the words around a large mouthful of turkey ham. Kaname merely smiled at him before selecting a fruit tart.

The next twenty minutes or so passed by pleasantly enough, Kaname filling Zero in on the amenities his villa had. There was an indoor swimming pool, a small cinema, barbeque pit and garden complete with flowering plants, walkways, fountain, mini river, bridge and even a gazebo. There were at least ten guestrooms, broadband access and state of the art desktop in every one of them and an impressive boardroom that could comfortably hold a dozen people for meetings. Kaname was the perfect host, pouring Zero a second cup of tea without being prompted and pressing him to try one of the small squares of cream cheese cake. He also mentioned the small town at the foot of the mountain where they could get fresh produce grown locally. Zero listened and nodded as he ate but he was also aware of the growing longing in those dark eyes that were constantly on him no matter how casual their owner tried to act. He knew what Kaname was after but he wasn't going to capitulate so soon. It wasn't that Zero wanted to continue to keep Kaname in suspense. He just wanted their next biting session to go perfectly this time and was determined to do it after a good long sleep. It wouldn't be at all polite to fall upon one's host so soon after arriving at his house no matter how welcome his action would be.

As the sky continued to lighten outside, it became more and more difficult to ignore the barely masked look of desperate yearning in Kaname's expressive eyes. When Zero couldn't take it any longer, he sighed and raised his eyebrows at the pureblood over the rim of his teacup.

"I would rather wait until this evening," he said gently, inwardly wincing when Kaname's eyes widened in shock and dismay. He wasn't surprised that the pureblood had caught onto his meaning immediately.

"But why?" Kaname blurted out before he could stop himself. Zero drained his cup and put down it down carefully.

"I want it to go well this time, Kaname," he said quietly. "I promised you that. I want us both to be well rested first."

_Especially you, since a long session means I'm going to take more._

Kaname opened his mouth to argue but closed it again when he saw the stubborn look on Zero's face. He almost pouted but thought better of it and held his lower lip between his teeth instead. Zero almost groaned at the sight.

"This evening," he added quickly. "We have four days, remember? This evening, I promise."

Kaname nodded, his disappointment tempered by Zero's words and the promise silently echoed in those amethyst eyes. This was again, why the hunter was so different from everyone else.

"All right," he murmured softly. "I'll wait."

- o -

Kaname awoke from his light slumber a couple of hours before sunset. He had gone to bed late and hadn't slept much even after the punishing work schedule of the past week. He had tried but after more than an hour of lying restlessly in bed counting sheep, he had given up and gone to his study to check on his email instead. He spent half an hour sending off replies to the more urgent ones and another hour catching up on the day's news. After fifteen minutes of pacing up and down in his study, he decided to go back to bed. It took him at least twenty minutes of relaxing breathing before he fell asleep and woke up a few hours later, his mind too alert to get anymore rest.

Kaname sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. He got out of bed and stretched. Perhaps he should go for a brisk swim to work off his nervous energy. He couldn't help mocking himself as he swapped his pyjamas for swimming trunks - he was getting so worked up over a bite and yet he knew it was no use. He was addicted to Zero's fangs... and to the man himself. Kaname tied a toweling robe around himself and went downstairs to the first floor where the heated indoor pool was. He dropped his robe onto a deck chair and dived gracefully into the water, swiftly making his way to the other end. The water was comfortably warm; the staff always kept the heater on whenever the villa was occupied. Kaname covered the length of the pool numerous times, smoothly changing his strokes after every couple of laps. When he finally got out after almost an hour of non stop swimming, he was breathing quickly, the muscles in his arms and legs trembling slightly with exhaustion.

Unfortunately, Kaname's mind was still restless despite the strenuous exercise. He was chagrined but not really surprised to find himself even half aroused after fantasising about the forthcoming bite and Zero's words about wanting him to be well rested first. Shaking his head resignedly, Kaname went back to his room to shower. He preferred his own bathroom to the shower stalls beside the pool. All the guestrooms were glazed for privacy and his was double glazed. Perhaps it would be a good idea to relieve himself at the same time since he knew Zero's fangs would arouse him later? It was the waiting that was always the hardest, Kaname decided philosophically as he stepped out of his trunks and got into the spacious glass walled shower cubicle. No doubt Zero was sleeping like a baby a couple of doors down the corridor and had no idea of the torment his brother-in-law was under.

_So much for wanting me to be well rested...!_

A wry smile tilted Kaname's supple lips. He shampooed his hair under the hot spray of the shower before squeezing a generous amount of shower cream onto a bath sponge. After scrubbing himself down, he tossed the sponge aside and wrapped soapy fingers around his semi hard length. Slowly, he started fisting himself. Bringing himself off like this was something Kaname did only when absolutely necessary. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy the act or the heart pounding release of orgasm; he did but it just made him feel lonelier after each release. He preferred to rely on cold showers and work to distract him. Not this time, though. He was going to do this because he needed to calm himself down and besides he wasn't alone on this trip. Zero was here too... still sleeping in another room perhaps but here all the same.

Kaname's eyes glowed with anticipation. Uttering a soft sigh, he closed his eyes and breathed in the steamy air. His fingers slid firmly along his aroused length, the soapsuds rendering the friction deliciously slippery. Blood pooled thickly in his groin, making him fully engorged. Kaname imagined it was Zero's slightly calloused hand on his throbbing flesh instead of his own smooth one. His breathing turned shallow. He brought Zero's sweet soft scent to mind, recalling how soundly the hunter had slept in the car earlier and how the soft even breathing was proof of the solid trust between them. He thought of how tightly Zero had held him during his last visit, dropping kisses on his hair as he reassured and soothed him. He had promised not to think about what he had done in the past but he was as moved by Zero's fierce entreaties then as he was now. Kaname's head fell back, a shaky sigh that was almost a sob escaping his lips. He stroked himself harder and faster. His thoughts, his emotions, his focus - everything about him was centered wholly on the hunter he loved and adored. It didn't take long for him to peak. Kaname cried out as he came, shuddering hard as his essence spilled past his fingers and stained the tiles, more mixing with the soapsuds running down his trembling thighs.

_Zero, Zero, Zero!_

If only Zero was with him now. If only it was Zero's hand bringing him sweet release like this. Kaname leaned against the wall, eyes closed and chest heaving as he slowly came down from his high. He could feel the same bittersweet ache swelling in his heart but this time, it didn't hurt as much. Kaname allowed himself a hopeful little smile. He would be with Zero soon and that would make the hurt go away even if only temporarily. He took a deep breath and exhaled, pushing off from the wall. He switched on the water and rinsed off the soapsuds and his secretions.

_I don't care how long this takes. Whatever time I can spend with Zero is worth it._

- o -

Zero awoke not too long after Kaname did. He had had a good nap in the car but it was a pleasant surprise to wake up on a large, comfortable bed with luxuriously soft cotton sheets and know that he didn't have anywhere urgent to go to. This room was large and airy, the bay windows at the far side overlooking the valley. The windows were placed such that the setting sun didn't shine directly into the room. Zero lazed in bed for a while and then rested his head on his hands and contemplated the carved ceiling. Kaname was probably already awake but he didn't feel like going to meet him just yet. Kaname might be on holiday but Zero was sure he had brought his work with him and didn't want his brother-in-law to feel he had to entertain him all the time.

_Or be entertained..._

A wry smile tilted Zero's lips. Kaname exasperated him sometimes... but it was impossible to be really angry with him for long. It was funny in a way but Zero sometimes felt like he was the elder one of the two. Perhaps it was just how genial and easy going Kaname acted whenever he came to Cross Academy, seemingly content to have Yuuki fuss over him while Zero ordered him to eat more and stop working so hard. Or perhaps it was how clingy and vulnerable Kaname acted particularly after confessing how much he craved Zero's bite and how he had craved it for years.

Zero sighed and sat up, running a hand through his ruffled hair. His thoughts had gone flying to Kaname again! Suddenly, he didn't feel like lazing in bed any longer. He got up and went to take a quick shower in the large attached bathroom before going downstairs. Zero didn't knock on Kaname's door despite knowing which room was his - the two of them had gone to their respective rooms together after tea earlier. He had a suspicion that if Kaname wasn't still sleeping, he was probably working. When Zero reached the landing of the first floor, he wasn't surprised to see Seiren already waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs. She had materialised out of nowhere as was her wont.

"Good evening, Kiryuu-san. Kaname-sama is waiting for you on the verandah of the east dining room," she informed him, gesturing to the left side of the stairs. Zero nodded his thanks as he obediently turned to his left. He found himself suddenly wondering if Seiren knew about the taboo arrangement he had with Kaname. She had to, since she was the one who managed the pureblood's appointments and as such, knew where he was at all times.

_And now I'm in this huge villa with him for the next three days..._

Zero dug his hands in his jeans pockets, feeling a bout of self-consciousness he hadn't felt for a long, long time. Not that Seiren would say or do anything, of course. She was the soul of discretion but it didn't help the warmth Zero could feel stealing into his cheeks. Coming to the end of the corridor, he squared his shoulders and pushed open the door. It led to a tastefully decorated dining room that could have easily held a party of fifty people complete with tables. There was even a section of the floor reserved for a live band and dancing. Zero raised his eyebrows and made his way to the door at the other end. The balcony was large and overlooked the same view of the valley as Zero's room. He took a deep breath of the cool evening air and was glad he had put on a long sleeved T-shirt. Kaname was sitting at one of the small square tables near the carved stone balustrade, his long legs elegantly crossed. He was wearing a dark chocolate cashmere sweater and casual slacks. Despite himself, Zero smiled. Kaname probably couldn't look bad if he tried.

"Zero," Kaname's smile was warm as he pulled out the chair beside him. "I thought we would have breakfast here, do you mind?"

"Mind?" Zero shook his head as he came over. "The view is wonderful, why on earth would I mind?"

Kaname smiled happily as he reached for the silver coffeepot. A maid was already wheeling a covered trolley towards them. When she slid open the cover, Zero's eyes widened. He turned towards Kaname.

"You'd better be eating most of that. You're the one skinny as a rail..."

The maid was too well trained to betray more than a twitch of her eyebrow at Zero's casual tone. She placed several platters of bacon, egg, tomatoes, sausages, toast and jam on the table before wheeling the trolley away. Kaname smiled and speared a sausage, placing it on Zero's place.

"I eat enough, Zero. And I am _not _skinny."

"Yes, you are," Zero argued, more to distract him from the way the breeze was playing with Kaname's hair than anything else. He hadn't seen the pureblood look so peaceful for a long time. In fact, he was pretty much feeling that way himself.

This time, Kaname had himself under strict control. He refrained from letting Zero know through looks or words how much he was looking forward their next feeding session. He was more rational and composed after his shower and realised he could very possibly ruin Zero's vacation by expecting him to bite him every couple of hours. He wanted Zero to welcome his company not get annoyed by it. Accordingly, Kaname behaved as though he didn't have a care in the world during their breakfast. They bantered lightly back and forth, trading insults with affectionate smiles. For a few minutes, Kaname was truly, truly happy. This was a small taste of what he had longed for years... the chance to have Zero all to himself with nothing between them, both of them acting as if the rest of the world didn't exist. He knew all too well that it was only an illusion - Zero was still a grieving widower and he had his children to think about. Their world would never accept the idea of them as a couple, no matter how far co-existence had come in the past thirty years. And Zero would likely never see him as more than a trusted member of the family.

_No. Not now._

With an effort, Kaname pushed those depressing thoughts out of the way, not allowing them to press on his heart or show on his face. Zero was here with him now and he didn't want anything to ruin this moment. He was determined to enjoy every moment of this vacation and was determined that Zero did the same. Kaname was a master at conversations whether with pureblood peers or subordinates and he went out of his way to be a perfect and charming host, serving Zero as if it was second nature to him, uncaring as to what his staff thought of his behaviour. They were handpicked by Seiren and he trusted her implicitly in this.

Zero was a little surprised at first when he saw only friendliness in those dark chocolate eyes. It was only after his second cup of rich Brazilian coffee that he finally realised Kaname had to be keeping his feelings hidden because he didn't want to make him feel beholden. It wasn't possible for Kaname to change his mind or his craving in a matter of hours, not after confessing to them on that fateful trip and not when it had been so obvious this morning.

In the end, it was Zero who broached the subject. He waited until Kaname had poured himself a second cup of tea before clearing his throat.

"What are your plans for this evening?"

Kaname was stirring sugar into his cup but he stopped immediately and looked up. For the briefest of seconds, Zero glimpsed the same longing in those dark eyes before Kaname dropped his gaze. When he looked back up, that look had vanished, replaced with one of casual interest.

"Whatever you like, Zero. We could go watch a movie in the cinema, Seiren has it stocked with the latest blockbusters. Or we could go for a swim in the pool if you prefer that."

Kaname wouldn't mind immersing himself in chlorinated water again if it meant seeing Zero in swimming trunks. He blinked in surprise when Zero shook his head and smiled at him.

"I have a better idea," he suggested softly, his eyes taking on a twinkle that made Kaname forget about his tea especially when the hunter leaned forward and whispered, "I could do what I promised."

Kaname inhaled sharply, eyes wide, mouth opened in a small 'o' of surprise and cheeks flushing with surprised pleasure.

"Zero..." he whispered, all his perfect manners and composure leaving him in a rush of blinding, dizzying anticipation.

"I promised you a good long session, Kaname," Zero whispered back. "Let's get to it now."

Kaname beamed at him and stood up, his eyes positively shining with eagerness and his chair scraping back rather inelegantly in his haste. He was betraying the longing he had camouflaged for the past forty minutes or so but again, he didn't care. He was finally getting the dream feeding session he had been fantasising about for the past one and a half weeks which until now had remained unfulfilled.

_But this time, it will be perfect. I know it will._

- Chapter End -


	19. Chapter 19: The Order

**Author Notes:** Hello everyone! Again, thank you so much for your lovely reviews and words of encouragement! If only I could lock myself up in a room somewhere (complete with high speed broadband, state of the art notebook and and an endless supply of food and drink) so that I can just write away _-grins- _Others may fantasise about world tours and endless shopping but I'm apparently different _-rolls eyes at herself- _Anyhow, here is the next chapter posted sooner than even I thought possible. Enjoy it while I uh, go hide somewhere, OK?

**Appreciation:** My grateful thanks to **kanazerosukenaru **for her wonderful suggestion to Zero (see her review for Chapter 16). I have used it here even if... well, you'll know what I mean :D

- Chapter Start -

Without another word, Kaname and Zero left the balcony and went back indoors, exiting through the dining room. They both tried to act normal but the side glances they kept giving each other betrayed their nervousness. It wasn't the first time Zero would be feeding from Kaname but with his promise hanging in the air between them, they both felt as apprehensive and excited as if, well, as if it was their first time. Unsurprisingly, Seiren was nowhere to be found in the hall. The uneasy thought crossed Zero's mind that she not only knew he drank Kaname's blood but also when each feeding took place, even the one they were about to indulge in. He wasn't sure if he should be reassured by that.

They went up the stairs, Zero aware of his racing heartbeat, just a step behind Kaname's. When the pureblood turned to smile at him as they reached the first floor. Zero saw that he looked even more eager than he did, those dark eyes holding a sparkle of anticipation. They rounded the landing and went on up to the second floor and then the third where their rooms were. Together, they stopped at the top of the stairs. The very air around them thrummed with barely suppressed anticipation.

"I - Shall we go to my room?" Kaname asked and almost cringed at the obvious hesitation. His normal eloquence had deserted him yet again. He darted a nervous glance at Zero, wetting his dry lips. Zero hesitated, his gaze caught by that brief tantalising glimpse of a tapering pink tongue. He knew Kaname wanted him to say yes but somehow... he couldn't. The words 'my room' just sounded way too intimate. This was Kaname's house or one of many after all, unlike the room he occupied in Cross Academy. It meant nothing - Zero knew he was just being silly - but it still felt like a step forward he wasn't comfortable with. He shook his head and jerked it in the direction of his bedroom, only two doors away from where they stood.

"No. I'd rather we go to mine," he replied, the words sounding a bit more abrupt than he had meant. Kaname nodded quickly, unwilling to say anything that might make Zero change his mind. He made a valiant attempt to calm himself lest his eagerness also scared Zero away but he couldn't... He was looking forward to this session so much and what the hunter had promised, he would deliver. Kaname knew that as well as he knew his own name. Longing for Zero's fangs swelled in his heart and he couldn't speak.

By this time, Zero had already opened his room door and stepped in, holding the door open for Kaname. To their heightened senses and anticipation, the soft click of the door as it closed behind the pureblood seemed overly loud as did the second click when Zero slid the deadbolt home. It was a reflex, really. No one would dare come in and no one would sense Kaname's blood either but Zero felt much safer with the door locked. This wasn't his home.

Kaname had stopped at the foot of the King sized bed. He took a moment to note that the maids had already been in since Zero had gone down for breakfast - the drapes at the windows were drawn to the sides and neatly tied back, the sheets on the bed straightened and the coverlet arranged perfectly on top. The shaded lamps on the side tables had also been switched, on bathing the room with a gentle golden glow. Slowly, Kaname spun around on his heel to face Zero.

"Well," he said softly, the word coming out a little uncertainly as Zero walked towards him. Kaname's hands came up to undo his shirt and faltered. He had always - by some strange coincidence but surprising when you thought about it all the same - worn a shirt when feeding Zero but today he had on a sweater instead. There was no reason for him to be wearing a shirt now - he hadn't come from the office, he wasn't going there either, he was on vacation, it was cooler here in the villa but... It was one thing to have on a shirt that required you to undo the buttons and part the collar. It was another thing altogether to wear a garment that you could only take off by pulling it over your head. Of course it didn't matter what he wore since he would take it off anyway, not wanting to get his pure blood on it but it was _different_.

Kaname chastised himself immediately for that brief and completely nonsensical hesitation. He was going to end up shirtless anyway. It was just that pulling one's sweater over one's head was so... awkward. Ungraceful. Far less enticing. He knew that Zero enjoyed watching him unbutton his shirt if the darkening of those amethyst eyes were any indication and now he couldn't even entertain him that way. Kaname almost pouted in the same nonsensical disappointment.

A perplexed frown pulled Zero's eyebrows together. Kaname had seemed so eager earlier at the balcony but now he was giving off vibes of mild distress as he avoided the other's gaze and chewed at his lower lip. Zero dragged his gaze from that beautifully shaped mouth as he came forward.

"Hey," he said softly. "Is anything wrong? Have you changed your mind?"

Kaname blinked and quickly shook his head, realising how utterly foolish he must look to Zero. After his confession about his desperate craving with actions to match, he was acting like a cloistered virgin asked to strip. Oh, for heaven's sake...! Kaname pressed his lips together, vexed at himself. He curled long fingers around the hem of his sweater and prepared to pull it over his head when he froze. Zero had moved closer and was now standing a mere foot away.

"Here, let me help you with that," he murmured with a reassuring smile as he covered Kaname's cold hands with own warm ones.

_He knows. Oh God, this is so embarrassing...!_

Kaname blushed, his creamy skin taking on a pink hue that made Zero's smile turn to one of tender amusement. Still, he said nothing as he helped lift the sweater over Kaname's head. Then the thick garment was bunched up in Zero's left hand, his mind absently registering the warmth it retained from Kaname's body heat and the gorgeous soft scent it now held. The rest of his attention was caught - as it always was - by how utterly perfect Kaname looked. The longish brown tresses were slightly mussed from the playful breeze earlier and the sweater but dear God if it didn't just make the pureblood look ten times more appealing!

Zero inhaled Kaname's scent deeply and sighed it out, unaware that his heated gaze was devouring the pureblood as he stood there, staring at him in turn with widened eyes, seemingly uncertain of his appeal. The soft light picked out the glossy reddish highlights in the loose waves of his hair. It lent Kaname's pale skin a golden hue and turned the pale pink of his nipples to apricot. Kaname felt a slight shiver of pure pleasure ripple through him as Zero's intensely admiring gaze moved from his head down to his chest. His nipples puckered in response.

"So unfair," Zero muttered under his breath as he shook his head, his eyes now fixed on those pebbled nipples. Kaname blinked. What was unfair? He was only wearing his slacks while Zero was still fully clothed. Surely it should be him saying those words?

"What is?" he asked, the breathless quality to his voice deepening the blush on his cheeks. Very slowly, Zero's gaze left Kaname's chest and travelled upward once more, past the delicate collarbones that created such attractive hollows, up the slender neck where he could see the madly beating pulse just under the pale skin, up to that perfect face with that rosy blush. By the time Zero's eyes reached Kaname's, the amethyst irises were blazing crimson with hunger. Kaname gulped as he waited, so high strung he wasn't even breathing.

"That you look so good without even trying," Zero whispered huskily as though to himself, again shaking his head in wonder. "So damned perfect."

At that moment, Kaname could have fainted from a mix of pure joy and insufficient oxygen going to the brain. He didn't know how to respond to that compliment. He should probably say thank you but what he really wanted was for Zero to bite him, kiss him, hold him, make love to him and never stop. Never ever stop.

"Zero," he implored huskily. "Bite me, please."

He was fine starting off with that.

_And love me. Love me like you had loved Yuuki..._

In the end, it was the memory of his younger sister more than anything else that saved Kaname from begging any further. He drew a slow breath as he searched blindly for that elusive control, willing himself to remain composed. Or at least not start screaming and throwing himself at the hunter.

"You might want to remove your shirt first," he managed in a reasonably steady voice after a moment. Zero frowned and looked down at himself.

"I'm fine," he began and pursed his lips. He didn't really bring that many tops with him...

"All right," he conceded. Stepping back, he grasped the hem of his T-shirt and whipped it over his head with a complete lack of self consciousness. He tossed the shirt onto the bed beside Kaname's sweater, unknowingly giving the latter the chance to stare at him in turn. Kaname had seen parts of Zero's chest before, mostly to check on his injuries when the hunter had needed his blood but with the air of high expectation between them, Kaname felt as if he were truly seeing Zero shirtless for the first time accented with mussed silvery hair, gleaming eyes, predatory look and lean muscled frame.

_No. The one who is perfect is you, Zero._

At first, Zero stood there silently with his fangs throbbing with need. He was torn between wanting to seize hold of Kaname and wanting to say something gently sarcastic as he was quite openly and unabashedly ogled. After half a minute, he was chagrined to feel goose bumps rippling over his skin, his own nipples tightening under the stare of that awed worshipping gaze. Zero finally sighed and shifted under that unrelenting scrutiny. Kaname blinked as the hunter's movement broke the spell he was under. He stepped forward and raised his hands, sliding soft palms lightly and reverently up Zero's muscled arms before resting them on those strong shoulders. He wanted to glide worshipping fingertips over every inch of Zero's chest but told himself not to, it would only scare the hunter off. There was a look of somewhat resigned amusement in Zero's eyes as he placed his own hands on Kaname's waist and tugged him even closer, feeling absurdly as if they were about to dance or do something infinitely, incredibly intimate. They were already shirtless and besides, wasn't this an intimate dance of sorts? Because dance implied trust... touching and holding... giving and taking...

"Here, come closer," Zero coaxed. "I'll make this a perfect session for you, Kaname."

_If nothing else, to make up for all the ones I botched up before._

Zero's soft words filled Kaname with breathless excitement and a burning need to be claimed by those beloved fangs. He could already see them behind Zero's lips, lengthened to needle sharp points. They had penetrated his flesh so many times and each session felt even more perfect than the one before. Kaname's mouth went dry. He too wanted this feeding to go perfectly. No, he wanted it even more than Zero did. Zero could not possibly understand how much he had craved it these past week and a half. If he didn't have eight different complicated projects going on at the same time, each with their own tight deadlines and issues, Kaname suspected he might have caved in and gone to find Zero, mission or no mission. This session now was his reward. For his patience, for waiting.

Zero blinked when Kaname's melting soft gaze turned suddenly fierce and wondered what could he have possibly done wrong at this stage.

"You don't have to worry." It was Kaname who uttered those reassuring words, startling Zero further. "I - I know I messed things up the last time you fed from me but this time, I will be careful. I _will_, Zero."

Controlling his body and reaction really was a small price to pay for the heaven of being in Zero's arms, wasn't it? Kaname argued with himself, absently wondering why Zero was now frowning and looking more put out than reassured. The hunter was not at all pleased to have the words taken right out of his mouth. Those were his lines and not Kaname's, just like how it had been his fault the last time and not Kaname's.

"We are going to do this a little differently," Zero announced as if the pureblood hadn't spoken at all, making the latter's lips part in dismay. Oh dear, surely Zero wasn't going to suggest using a cup or something similar, was he? That would make the whole thing meaningless! Less than meaningless! Kaname frantically tried to clear the fog in his brain enough to think of a reasonable argument. Before he had strung two words together, Zero grasped his shoulders and swung him around, not swiftly but deliberately. Kaname obeyed wordlessly, too stunned to do anything else as the other half of the room slid into view in front of his eyes.

"Like this," Zero purred in Kaname's delicately shaped ear, his breath tickling the sensitive skin of his earlobe. Kaname gazed wide eyed at the lace covered windows, inhaling sharply as two warm arms snaked around his waist and gently tugged him backwards. Kaname followed until his back came up flush against an equally warm chest. He could feel and hear the strongly beating heart within as clearly as he could feel the stiffened points of Zero's nipples against his back. A deep shudder shook him.

_I'm in heaven... and he hasn't even bitten me yet._

"Like this," Zero repeated, his deep voice sounding more of a growl now than a purr. He gave a small lick to the tempting skin just below Kaname's right ear. The pureblood gasped, mouth parting in delighted surprise. Instinctively, he reached backwards and pressed his palms against denim clad hips, palms stroking, long fingers reveling in the soft worn material warmed by their owner's body heat. A wondering but pleased smile tilted Kaname's lips and a joyful sparkle lit his eyes. Oh, why hadn't he ever thought of this position before, this was wonderful! Zero wouldn't be able to feel his erection no matter how hard he became so he could just - just let go and enjoy the bite to the fullest!

Kaname could have laughed for sheer joy. True, he wouldn't be able to nestle against Zero's chest or wrap his arms around his waist like he always did but this position made for a very nice change indeed. Kaname could hardly wait, he was already quivering to feel Zero biting him from behind, longing to experience that glorious moment when those sharp fangs would break his skin and drive deep. That thought was enough to stir his flesh despite relieving himself earlier. But Zero wouldn't know that, would he?

Kaname offered the hunter a dazzling smile over his shoulder, taking the other slightly aback. He should have known that Kaname would be thrilled. And so are you, piped up that annoying voice that Zero was so sure he had left back in Cross Academy but had apparently jumped into his duffel bag without him noticing.

_You again! Well, happy now?_

Without waiting for its reply, Zero dipped his head to Kaname's neck and the pureblood immediately tilted his head to the left, exposing his bite area eagerly.

"Are you ready, Kaname?" Zero asked, his deep voice now laced with hunger. He wasn't injured or tired right now so this time, it was solely because he wanted Kaname's blood. He wanted it for no other reason than the fact that it tasted unbelievably good. He wanted to bite Kaname for no other reason than to give him pleasure. This time, Zero vowed to himself, this time he needn't worry about Kaname's reaction to his bite because he wouldn't be able to feel the evidence pressing against him. That had felt strange... but what Zero was most uncomfortable with was the fact that the strangeness had felt more good than bad. That in itself was wrong. Wasn't it?

Kaname shivered again at Zero's words, his blood thrumming in his veins, begging to be drawn in the only way he cared. With Zero's fangs.

"Yes," he groaned. "I'm ready, Zero. Now, please..." he implored, eyes closing in giddy anticipation. Zero's answer was a long, slow swipe of his tongue right across the Kaname's bite area. The pureblood's knees quivered at that and then almost buckled when Zero blew on the patch of damp skin, the pulse was beneath it jumping even more madly than before.

"Z-Zero... oh please!"

"Shush."

Zero applied his tongue again and again, enjoying the ensuing little cry that was almost a squeak when he gave Kaname's earlobe a sharp little nip.

"Aahh!"

"Hush now..."

This time, Kaname could hear the smile in Zero's voice. He pouted and rubbed his palms up and down the sides of Zero's hips, loving the feel of that soft denim against his skin. He wondered if Zero would mind lending him this pair of jeans to wear someday. It might be a bit loose for him but it would feel so, so good... With that thought in mind, Kaname sighed and leaned back with abandon, trusting Zero to take his weight. He smiled when the strong body behind his shifted and then braced itself. Zero would _always _catch him, Kaname would stake his life on it. And then it happened - that one perfect, _gloriously _perfect instant when Zero bit him. Kaname gasped and stiffened, eyes rolling to the back of his head as those beloved fangs penetrated his flesh and went deep, deep, deep...

_Deeper, Zero. So deep you can never leave me again..._

Kaname had fantasised so much about this moment that Zero's fangs were nearly enough to bring him to tears. He was incapable of speech at that moment so he utilised his pureblood senses to track Zero's every response as he fed from him - the deep groan in his throat as the rich nectar first flooded his mouth and the minute shivers going through his body as he swallowed that very first mouthful. Kaname exulted in the strong arms that tightened possessively around his waist as he was pulled closer still, hot puffs of breath brushing his neck... he went from semi aroused to rock hard in exactly two seconds.

Zero didn't notice. He was in a blood induced high as he sucked and gulped Kaname's blood almost ravenously despite having just eaten. After the high expectation of the past week, the taste was pure ambrosia to his senses and holding his donor just made it all that much better. Zero's first few mouthfuls were admittedly deep and drawn more rapidly than he had intended but he slammed on the brakes as soon as he realised it. He knew that Kaname would never tell him to slow down. That in itself made the responsibility fully Zero's. He wanted this to last as long as possible and forced himself to slow down even with the temptation to take more continually goading him on. Kaname didn't mind how slowly Zero drank - the very act of sucking blood made the hunter's lips move erotically over his damp and sensitised skin, drawing repeated shivers from him. They grew more intense as Zero slowed down, drawing out the delight and making it as delicious as it was excruciating for both of them.

Kaname grew harder and harder until he literally ached. Zero's mouth was forcing his blood upwards towards his neck but the result of that bite was also drawing the rest of his blood away and down towards his groin. It made for a very pleasurable sort of dizziness. Kaname panted softly, head lolling bonelessly against Zero's left shoulder. He groaned in his throat, trying to find a way to assuage the fiercely throbbing ache between his legs but at the same time, too shy to use his hands in front of Zero. Instead, he reached backwards and wrapped his trembling arms around the hunter's waist as far as they could go, in a mute plea for - for some contact, friction, _something_. It still wasn't enough because Kaname's upper half was trapped in place by Zero's mouth latched onto his neck and by those strong arms around his waist. He could only move his head and the lower half of his body.

Kaname started moving his hips from side to side in slow sinuous movements, much like how a cat would rub against a wall with its eyes closed to relieve a troubling itch. He could feel the tight points of Zero's nipples against the sensitive skin of his back and the strong pounding of that heart behind his. Zero was too caught up to notice what Kaname was doing but something was starting to feel really, really good. He dug his fangs deeper into Kaname's neck in response, making the pureblood shudder with delight. He rubbed up against Zero even more, unconsciously rocking his hips as he swayed, back and forth, side to side, his buttocks pressing firmly against Zero's groin. It didn't at all help to relieve the ache in his arousal but it still felt inordinately good. Zero thought so as well for he growled and his next mouthful of blood was almost ruthlessly drawn from Kaname.

"Unnh... Ze-Zerooo!"

The passionate moan and the way Kaname bucked in his arms caught Zero's attention at last. His eyes blinked open and he found himself staring rather bemusedly on a tightly puckered nub. It took him a moment to realise that it was actually Kaname's left nipple. Zero kept his gaze on it as he slid his fangs out slowly, sensuously. Kaname whimpered at the sensation, nerve endings aflame as Zero withdrew his fangs, only to utter a small scream of delight as the hunter plunged them in again a second later. It was pain and it was pleasure and the combination was utterly, _gorgeously _sublime. Kaname started thrashing about delightfully within the circle of Zero's arms, head thrown back, eyes closed and mouth opened in a silent scream of joy. The dizziness was increasing but it felt so unimaginably good as the remainder of his blood pooled thickly between his legs.

Zero had braced himself for Kaname's reaction when he bit him again and he was not disappointed. In fact, he was thrilled to see that left nipple tighten even more in response. In Zero's blood lust filled haze, it beckoned to him. For some reason, he longed to touch that dainty pebbled surface... just to see what it felt like of course. He raised his right hand and stretched his fingers, the middle digit just long enough to whisk lightly over the bud. Kaname jerked and whimpered again. Zero's pounding heart leapt in triumph. He reached up his right arm a little more, captured that tight little nipple between thumb and forefinger and started rolling it gently.

"H-haah...!"

Zero would have smiled if his fangs weren't so deeply buried in Kaname's tender flesh. He drew another mouthful of warm blood and swallowed, fingers still pleasuring the gasping pureblood. Zero was just contemplating using his left hand to torment the other nipple when Kaname moved. He was trapped within the tight circle of Zero's arms, so weakened by pleasure he couldn't break free even if he had wanted to but the sweet torture being wreaked upon his sensitive flesh was just too much to be borne in silence and in stillness. Kaname started moving again, hands sweeping slowly, sensuously up Zero's sides, past those taut biceps and around those broad shoulders, lower body still sliding against the hunter's as much as he could. It was a slow and gloriously intimate dance, Kaname's movements infinitely graceful, even sensual. Both pureblood and hunter were enthralled with the erotic heat building between them, their breathing loud and somewhat ragged in the otherwise silent room.

Kaname had promised Zero he would not let him feel his arousal.

Zero had promised Kaname he would not stop until he had delivered on his promise.

But they both forgot their promises under the beguiling spell of pure blood, intimacy, trust and body warmth. Kaname and Zero were both so thrilled at the freedom this position afforded that neither had thought about the _other _possibility that might arise, that had in fact begun to happen. The friction and anticipation building up between them made sure that _something _had to give... and hard won control snapped at last. Kaname's taut buttocks were more than enough to make previously dormant flesh stir, what with the restriction of tight jeans and the euphoria of feeding on pure blood. Zero was too lost in the sensual delight of it all to remember his other fear while Kaname was too far gone to realise what exactly was that swiftly hardening length he could feel behind him.

The next couple of magical minutes passed in a haze of panting, swaying, moaning and caressing before Zero finally realised something was different. By then, his heart was pounding so hard in his chest and ears that he initially couldn't tell what it was. Once he realised that he was hard and aching and that he was mindlessly thrusting his hips against Kaname's buttocks, his pounding heart dropped right down into his stomach, settling there like a lump of ice. Shock washed over him and he froze on the spot, filled with sudden horror.

_Oh no. No, not this!_

Zero jerked his fangs out, once again tearing open the puncture wounds in Kaname's neck and making him cry out. Zero didn't apologise, he was shaking with reaction and shock. Hastily, he let go of Kaname and took a swift step back. His eyes were wide and his entire face burned with mortification. Zero felt like he could very possibly die of shame right at that moment. Memory of what he had once stated with conviction and with pride came back in a sudden blinding rush and he felt sick to his stomach. Despite all the blood he had taken, he felt his face drain of colour.

"Zero? What...?"

Kaname stumbled backwards a little, disoriented with blood loss and the sudden withdrawal of support and warmth from Zero's strong arms and back. One moment, he was in sheer heaven, every single fibre of him rejoicing in the intimate dance they were indulging in and the next, he was alone, bereft of contact and fangs. Kaname's body instinctively righted itself as he spun around to face the hunter. Zero was frozen on the spot, crimson eyes staring at him, bloodstained mouth open. The look of shame in those eyes helped Kaname's blood starved brain to realise that he hadn't imagined the hardness he had felt earlier. Automatically, his gaze dropped to the front of Zero's jeans and he saw the sizeable bulge beside the zipper that cemented the hunter's guilt once and for all.

"No..."

The raw groan of denial dragged Kaname's gaze back up to Zero's pale face.

"Zero," Kaname began uncertainly and cleared his throat. Instinct was screaming him to be very, very careful of what he wanted to say. His head was still spinning in an unhelpful way but despite it, his mind was suddenly, blindingly clear. He realised that Zero had become sexually aroused by drinking from him - all that gyrating didn't help matters either - and was unsurprised by it despite Zero's insistence that he only got that way when he drank from Yuuki and never from Kaname. This of course made perfect sense since Zero was in love with Yuuki, not him. Zero had bitten Yuuki many times before the first time Kaname fed him. His brain separated the two of them very clearly in his mind and hence his body reacted accordingly each time, trained over the years to see one as his lover in which the act of taking blood was one of love and intimacy, and the other as only his donor where giving blood was done solely to stabilise and to heal.

Kaname knew that the line would blur eventually. Yuuki was no longer here but he was and had confessed to Zero how much he adored his bite. Besides... Kaname's pale cheeks darkened with colour as he recalled the positively wanton way he had moved against Zero earlier, completely abandoning the control he was so proud of. Inwardly, he was thrilled that Zero had reacted so positively to his actions but it would be unwise to show it now. There was too much wariness emanating from Zero, his chest was heaving, his panting still ragged but he was otherwise standing very still... as if unable to reconcile himself to his body's unforgivable reaction. Kaname took a deep breath and tried again.

"Zero, listen to me," he began carefully, willing his voice to stay steady. He was frighteningly aware that the fragile intimacy that had begun to build between them was now was in danger of being ripped to shreds. The slightest body language or inflection of voice from him could very well push Zero away from him.

_I won't let it. Not after all the work I've put in..._

"No! Don't talk to me!" Zero burst out, hands clenched into shaking fists by his sides. He was disgusted with himself and so _mortified _it felt as if his face and his body were on fire. It probably was; he should burn in hell for being such a hypocrite. His body had betrayed him in the worst possible way.

"Zero, please!" Kaname begged, throwing caution to the winds, his distress rolling off him in waves. He raked trembling fingers through his hair. "Please don't be upset, there's nothing wrong with what you feel."

Zero's glare only intensified, lips pulling back in a silent snarl. Nothing wrong? He was so damned worked up his pulse pounding loudly in his ears and Kaname's blood was ramping it up tenfold! He had never felt this aroused before, he was literally shaking, aching for release and Kaname dared to say that nothing was wrong? What the hell did he mean? That this was _normal_? Well perhaps it was to the pureblood but he was not Kaname, damnit!

This _was _unnatural. This _was _wrong. This was disgusting _and _shameful.

No, it's not! It's perfectly one hundred perfect natural! piped up the voice in Zero's head, sounding as upset as Kaname. It sounded as though it would have pulled out its hair if it had any.

"There is nothing at all natural about this!" Zero shouted back at it, enunciating every single word through tightly clenched teeth, uncaring of the twin drops of blood welling up from where his fangs were digging into his lower lip. He should have known Kaname would play it down but he was humiliated. After all the fuss he had kicked up about Kaname's aroused state, after all his confessions about being aroused only while drinking from Yuuki, he had finally embarrassed himself. The last laugh was on him... still, Kaname was partly to blame, right? He was the one who had initiated those sultry movements, rubbing up against him as if he were a cat and Zero were... well, were a pillar made of catnip or something. Coupled with those sweet reactions, those soft passionate moans that had sounded so damned enticing to his ears...

"This is all your fault!" Zero growled at Kaname, a couple more drops of blood running down his chin and dripping onto his heaving chest. Perhaps the servants wouldn't be able to sense it but Kaname could. Oh, he could...! The alluring scent of his beloved's blood called to him and he groaned, his own fangs lengthening rapidly at the delicious sight and scent. Oh God, did Zero know he was bleeding? Did he have any idea what it was _doing _to him? Kaname wrapped trembling arms tightly around his middle, fighting to keep his wavering control, to stop himself from leaping at Zero's throat and plunging his suddenly throbbing fangs into it. He was already slightly dizzy with blood loss but no - he had vowed to himself he would never take what was not freely given, he had vowed that Zero would never _ever _be made to feel that he owed him anything...

"Don't, Zero," Kaname moaned softly, despairingly. He wasn't sure what he was protesting against - Zero unknowingly tempting him with his blood, Zero having once again stopped their session, Zero being furious with him or Zero accusing him of planning all this. He didn't know.

"Please don't, Zero."

"Don't what? This is your fault!" Zero shouted again, pointing his finger accusingly at the shaking pureblood. "If you hadn't - hadn't... moved-" he broke off and flushed deeper, wondering how the hell did one describe that erotic, sensuous dance Kaname had performed, rubbing his lithe figure against him and moaning like it was the best thing he had ever experienced. The mere thought of those perfectly shaped buttocks sliding repeatedly against his groin was enough to make him harder than ever and his anger increased correspondingly. His jeans were unbearably tight. Zero hadn't made love to Yuuki for more than eights months now, increasingly worried when she had first fallen ill and patiently waiting for her to get better instead of taking care of his own needs. But she grew weaker and weaker and in the frantic race to find doctors, medication and specialists while trying to comfort his children, he hadn't had the time not inclination to relieve himself then. He didn't even spare his body a thought, overcome with grief at the end when she had left him. Left them all.

_Yuuki. Oh God._

"Yuuki!" Zero gasped in renewed guilt, clutching at his hair and shaking his head, eyes squeezed shut. He was betraying her memory, the one thing he swore he would never do!

"Yuuki, I'm sorry!"

Kaname felt his heart sink right down to the carpet at Zero's words. It was plain to see that the hunter was berating himself for his perceived crime and Kaname's heart pounded with empathy and guilt. Perhaps he _was _to blame for Zero's aroused state but he honestly hadn't done it consciously and even now, he didn't think it was so very wrong to feel this way. It was inevitable... and if it didn't happen now, it would have happened someday anyway. Taking blood from another person was an intimate act to vampires. With the trust, respect and care between them, getting sexually aroused was a foregone conclusion. If only Zero could see that...! Kaname resisted the urge to tear his hair out fruitlessly. He took a deep breath and stepped forward, laying a shaking hand on Zero's shoulder.

"Look, please calm down," he said soothingly, trying without success to steady his own voice. Zero's head snapped up and he flung his arm out, knocking Kaname's hand from his shoulder.

"Don't patronise me!" he snapped, angrily tamping down a twinge of guilt in his heart as Kaname flinched. It had been his idea to hold Kaname from the back in the first place, only it had backfired on him. Scolding Kaname didn't relieve his feelings at all but Zero just didn't know how to react any differently. He should have realised that Kaname writhing so passionately against him like that would prove too much for his control. He should have!

"Zero, please - just calm down and we can talk-"

"No!" Zero shook his head stubbornly. He didn't want to talk. He wanted to yell at someone and kick a few things around, he wanted to sulk somewhere and he wanted to find a moment alone so that he could get down on his knees and beg forgiveness from his dearest for getting aroused and by her own _brother_, of all people! Zero's angry gaze flicked towards Kaname's hips where a bulge was still visible. The sight of it made him press his lips into a thin line.

"No. Let me tell you what I want, Kaname," he said grimly. Kaname swallowed, his dark eyes huge as he gazed at Zero. Every angry word the hunter spat out was cutting at his heart, cutting deeply and without remorse. He knew that Zero probably didn't mean half of what he said, that it was guilt and embarrassment making him act this way... but it was inordinately painful all the same. He could and did forgive Zero already but it still hurt. He was bleeding inside and Zero... oh God, Zero looked like he didn't know or didn't care. The vision of that angry, beloved face started to blur and Kaname held in a sob, held it in by sheer force of will alone. He would _not _humiliate himself in front of Zero like this, he would not! He may be incapable of scolding the one he loved or hurting him in return but he _had _his pride. Apparently, it was all he had. Pride and a hopeless body that betrayed him each time.

"I want you to go deal with that - thing, do you hear me?" Zero continued, making a visible attempt to control himself and not realising how cutting his words were. He was still glaring at the rapidly softening bulge in Kaname's pants. "I don't care how you do it, Kaname, but you go take care of that right now. It had better be gone the next time I see you. Do you hear me? I don't ever want to _see _that - that thing again!"

The next moment seemed to last forever. Zero's words weren't loud but they were unintentionally, unimaginably cruel and they slashed at Kaname's heart. The sob finally escaped from his trembling lips and the distressed sound hung in the air between them. Kaname held onto his shredded control for as long as he could but in the end, it was no use. He gave a hopeless shake of his head and rushed for the door, brushing past Zero. Another sob escaped Kaname as he struggled with the doorknob, as if he had forgotten how to work one. Finally, he managed to get the door open, almost wrenching off the door knob in the process.

Zero was left alone in his room panting raggedly. His chest was still heaving with a nausea-inducing blend of anger, shock and guilt and to top it off, his body was still aching with need. In the ringing silence, a cold and dreadful weight started to settle over him. There was a growing, undeniable feeling that he had just made the biggest mistake of his life. The voice in his head was shrieking at him but it hard to hear what it said over the pounding of his blood in his ears.

- o -

Kaname fled Zero's room, his vision blurring with hot tears, sobs clawing at his throat, threatening to choke him. He didn't know where to go... perhaps to the top floor where he could hide his pain in the darkened cinema or perhaps downstairs to the garden outside where he could sob his heart out? He didn't know. He didn't know!

All he knew was that he desperately needed to hide somewhere but he couldn't... not until he took care of something first. There had been such anger in Zero's voice and such horrifying finality in that strident tone when he ordered him to get rid of his arousal. Kaname didn't remotely feel like jerking off right now. He had gone completely limp in fact but that didn't change the fact that he was still driven to obey Zero, driven by something deep and primal inside his soul that not all the scolding, derision or pureblood pride in the world could overthrow. As far as Kaname was concerned, a direct command had been issued to him and he had to do _exactly _as Zero had said. The alternative... the alternative of not seeing the hunter again was too unthinkable to bear thinking about.

Kaname teetered indecisively for a moment at the top of the stairs before he spun to his right, his subconscious deciding where to go before his mind could even catch up. He rushed headlong down the thankfully empty corridor all the way to the end, the heavy carpet muffling the fast thud of his loafers. He was heading to his room, driven by sheer instinct, too distraught to think of employing his vampire speed or the fact that he might had run into one of his own servants. He burst into the room, slamming the door behind him and looking around him wildly.

The bathroom, he thoughts distractedly. He was dirty. He was guilty. He needed to be cleansed. Zero had looked at him as if he was disgusting... he needed to wash himself, purge himself of his guilt. He needed to relieve himself... Zero had ordered him to... perhaps later... later when he was calm and composed again... perhaps he would feel worthy of being in Zero's presence again... beg his forgiveness... but later... later...

Heedless of the hot tears falling down his cheeks and the sobs choking him, Kaname kicked off his shoes and stripped off his slacks and underwear with trembling hands before stumbling into the shower. His perfect, special holiday was crashing about his ears and he still wasn't quite sure how it had happened. _Why_? Why was this happening to him? All he wanted was Zero's love and the chance to be happy! Was that too much to ask for? Why was it too much?

Choking back another sob, Kaname reached blindly for the cold water tap and twisted it hard, as far as it would go. The resultant strong jet of icy water made him gasp and shiver but he stood stoically in its punishing spray, letting the cold spray wash away the tears on his face, hoping it would also cleanse away his guilt. He was drenched within seconds, long hair plastered to his head, goose bumps appearing all over his pale skin. His nipples had pebbled again but due to cold, not pleasure. With his vision blinded by tears and the icy water spraying over him, Kaname sank onto his knees on the cold tiled floor and bowed his head, the very picture of confused penitence with his shaking hands tightly clasped in his lap.

_Please don't be angry with me, Zero. I only get aroused because I love you. I'll do what you want. Just - just don't get angry with me, I can't bear it._

Kaname sniffed and then started crying in earnest. He was heartbroken and utterly miserable. All he could see in his mind's eye was Zero's angry face as he gave that oder, that order that Kaname felt compelled to obey, no matter what. He wrapped trembling fingers around the limp flesh between his thighs and started stroking himself, his sobs silenced by the strong icy spray of the shower.

_I'll do it, Zero... just don't be angry with me. I love you so, so much._

- Chapter End -


	20. Chapter 20: The Guilt

**Author Notes: **Hello everyone! _-crawls out of hiding place and brushes away cobwebs- _Thank you so much for your reviews, even the ones that er, made me look over my shoulder :D Here is the next chapter and I hope that the boys are still in character. I feel like I'm shooting in the dark sometimes... and of course I spend way too much of my little free time on Kaname and Zero. Still, I think it's worth it and hope you do too :D Enjoy...

- Chapter Start -

As soon as Kaname left, Zero sank onto his knees on the plush carpet. His legs were shaking so badly they were unable to hold up his weight any longer. In fact, his whole body was shaking despite the large quantity of pure blood inside him. The trouble with overindulging on Kaname's blood was that it amplified _everything _he was feeling. Everything felt either ten times as good or ten times as bad. The last couple of minutes were enough to make Zero almost physically ill with the nauseating combination of betrayal, shock, guilt and regret. He bowed his head and pressed trembling hands palm down on his thighs, trying not to throw up and looking for all the world like a condemned man waiting for some divine punishment from above. He should be. He was guilty. Guilty of so many things.

Right at the top of that list was the knife sharp, face burning, gut churning guilt for having betrayed the memory of his dearest Yuuki. He had gone on for more than half a year without once relieving his sexual needs. Indeed in the last couple of months when his world had collapsed on him, he hadn't even thought about it. But that was no excuse to get aroused while holding someone _else _in his arms, was it? Where the hell was his control and his willpower, for Pete's sake? What had happened to those principles he was justly proud of, that he had lived his life by? How the hell could he claim to be a grieving widower if he could get hard merely by drinking another person's blood? Someone who wasn't Yuuki?

Zero shook his head in disbelief, still stunned at his body's reaction. So what if he was a vampire and hence subjected to the needs and weaknesses of his kind? So what if his donor was a very willing pureblood whose blood was second to none? So what if that powerful, addicting nectar had come straight from the veins of a half naked and beautifully appealing creature who had moved so sensuously and passionately against him? None of those were good enough reasons to get aroused, no matter what Kaname had said before! To Zero, this 'perfectly normal vampire behaviour' was not at all acceptable if the other party involved wasn't Yuuki. It sounded too much like a convenient excuse that other vampires doubtlessly used to the fullest to indulge in mindless pleasures of the flesh without having to suffer any form of guilt. It had nothing to do with the values Zero held dear to his heart - values like love, honour, respect and faithfulness. Everything else just wasn't right and more importantly, didn't apply to him. It was as simple as that.

Zero's head dipped lower. He wasn't surprised that the front of his jeans fit well again. Guilt worked like a charm to keep ardour away. It was too late though. It had already happened and very thoroughly at that. Zero's face burned anew at how blatantly his body had betrayed him earlier. He had betrayed Yuuki's memory even though she was no longer here to see it. He needed her forgiveness. He needed her to know that his heart and his body still belonged to her no matter what just happened. He wasn't sure if she could hear him now - he wasn't at her grave for one thing - but he still needed her to understand why his body reacted that way and most importantly, he needed her to know that it had nothing to do with his heart or his soul that still loved her.

_I am so sorry, dearest. I didn't mean to, I swear, I didn't! It didn't mean a thing... I still love you._

Zero knelt there on the carpet, the apologetic words running through his mind again and again until the sharp stinging guilt in his heart had receded to a sore nagging ache of regret, shame and anguish.

_I never planned on - it was just that Kaname was - was moving against - uhm, he was..._

But wait - was it really Kaname's fault?

Zero frowned and forced himself to put the suffocating guilt aside for a moment to examine this question. It wasn't easy but he did it. He didn't want to make anymore mistakes. Now - was it truly Kaname's fault for being true to himself?

No. No, it wasn't, Zero reluctantly decided. It wasn't fair of him to blame Kaname for what had happened when it wasn't him who had initiated that position in the first place. It was also Zero who had deliberately teased Kaname when he knew, just _knew _how the pureblood would react. It wasn't right to hold Kaname responsible for how his own body had reacted.

_It... wasn't Kaname's fault, Yuuki. It was mine. I was the one who let my control slip but I swear it won't happen again._

Zero bit his lip. No, that was a lie. It would happen again. How could it not? The sensual side of him that had been dormant for so many months had now been roused and he knew the next time he fed from Kaname, his body would betray him again unless... unless he took some steps to prevent it? Zero frowned a little as he turned over a couple of possibilities in his mind. Well, he could keep body contact to a minimum for one thing... or perhaps even get Kaname to bleed into a cup? That is, if the pureblood was still willing to feed him. No more holding and teasing Kaname, no more trying to coax the most beguiling responses from him. But he was so darned appealing like that! No. Zero sternly brushed aside the regret that this thought brought him. That was what had gotten the both of them into this whole mess in the first place.

Wait - your promise! Zero almost started as that fierce voice piped up in his head.

_Promise? What promise?_

Your promise to hold Kaname while feeding from him, elaborated that voice in an exaggeratedly slow manner as if speaking to a particularly dimwitted person. It had thankfully stopped its tirade a few minutes ago when it was apparent there were no listeners. Zero groaned, his hands clenching into fists on his lap. There was just no getting around this, was there? Either way Kaname would... Kaname would get hurt. About time you realised this, stormed the voice. Zero sighed as he came to the second item on his list - betraying someone else whose soul was as gentle as Yuuki's.

_Geez. I did it again, didn't I?_

In the past month or so it seemed to Zero that every time he met Kaname, he somehow managed to say or do something to hurt the pureblood and each time that happened, he felt like a prize jerk. He exhaled, feeling his skin prickle all over with goose bumps of remorse. He had lashed out at Kaname for probably the hundredth time. After having promised never to blow up at him again, he had done just that and gone even further this time. He had shamed and humiliated his pureblood brother-in-law. True, there were no witnesses to see that but it was a miracle he was still alive to even feel regret. Zero clenched his jaw tighter together as hot and cold waves of embarrassment washed over him, leaving behind a thick layer of regret and self-disgust. He had shattered Kaname's pride and his priceless gift of trust and respect. Darned right you did! declared that voice in his head, sounding utterly peeved at him. Zero's face flushed a deep dull red and he scowled.

The question was, why? _Why _did Kaname allow him to say these things to his face? It just made Zero feel like the most despicable person on earth and the most confused one as well. His thoughts swung agitatedly from sister to brother and back again. Zero was guilty towards them both and he knew it. He refused to think whom he felt more guilty towards but he was starting to think he might have grieved Kaname just a little bit more. The promises he had made the pureblood brought a sour taste to his mouth and throat and left him miserable and shaken. Promising to hold Kaname had seemed like such a small insignificant price to pay, such a small act of simple courtesy that would please and comfort them both. Why was it turning out to be the exact opposite? What had he done wrong? Why was this happening? Why was he hurting Kaname each time when it was the last thing he intended?

_Kaname. I - I'm sorry._

You should be, declared that voice in the same righteous tone. Zero's head dipped lower.

_I was just shocked, all right? I swear I never expected to get uh, to feel anything while drinking from someone other than Yuuki. You know that!_

That doesn't disguise the fact that you said some very cruel things, does it? declared that voice, dripping disdain.

_I know! You don't have to remind me!_

I am going to remind you again and again because it looks like you've got one hell of a lousy memory, Kiryuu.

_I made vows to Yuuki, damnit!_

You made a promise to Kaname too, remember? You said you wouldn't care about his reaction anymore, the voice denounced him triumphantly as if it had scored a point.

_It wasn't his reaction that shocked me, it was mine!_

Then why - the - hell - did - you - yell - at - _him_?

This last question was voiced at a volume that made Zero wince.

_I - I was..._

Can you imagine the oozing mess you would be on this carpet if you'd said that to another pureblood who wasn't Kaname? You crushed his pride! Can you... can you imagine how he must be feeling now? Zero blinked. Was it possible for a voice in his head to sound tearful? He shook his head and swallowed past a throat that had swelled painfully large in the past minute or so. Yes. Yes, he had gone too far with Kaname. Again. He had crossed the line somewhere. The thing was, Zero thought somewhat bitterly, there seemed to be an awful lot of lines everywhere - it was like stepping through a minefield blindfolded, not knowing if the next step would cause something explode in his face. He took a deep breath and raked trembling fingers through his hair, his mind continuing to tick furiously. Why was it the more he tried to make Kaname happy, the more disappointed he made him? Was this arrangement they had between them something that had to stop before it destroyed their friendship and trust? After all, he was stable now... he didn't actually need Kaname's blood. And really, why should he even be thinking of prolonging his life when he had no one to -

Don't you go changing the subject, you hear me?

Zero winced again, both at the sheer volume and the renewed surge of guilt it brought him. The words he had flung at Kaname earlier came back to him and now that he had cooled down a little, he realised to his dismay how unintentionally cutting they had been.

_I want you to go deal with that - thing, do you hear me? I don't care how you do it, Kaname, but you go take care of that right now. It had better be gone the next time I see you. Do you hear me? I don't ever want to see that - that thing again!_

Zero groaned aloud, screwing his eyes shut tight. He hadn't really meant what he had said, it was just that... he had never thought that Kaname would move like that against him. Zero sighed tiredly and rubbed his hands over his eyes. He had run out of excuses. Again, those damning words echoed in his mind and he shook his head dazedly. He didn't know how he could have said them to Kaname. He recalled the stunned and hurt look in those expressive dark eyes, the horrified dismay written all over that beautiful face, the soft heart wrenching sob that followed...

_Oh God. I need to apologise to Kaname. I need... to make things right, to let him know that I didn't..._

He had to see Kaname. Now. He had to apologise to him. Zero struggled to his feet, cursing under his breath as the blood rushed to his cramped limbs and he almost fell over. He stamped his feet, trying to get rid of the sensation of pins and needles pricking his lower limbs. Rather belatedly, he realised that the anguish he could feel inside of him wasn't all his. That only meant that Kaname... Zero whirled around, a sense of urgency seizing him. How long had he stayed here? Where was Kaname? He needed to find him, to tell him that it wasn't his fault, that he didn't have to hide his body's reaction despite - despite what he had been told.

Halfway to the door, Zero froze. He had ordered Kaname to 'take care of that' but at that time, he was too mortified to know exactly what he had meant by those words. But what would Kaname think it would mean? If he chose to obey, that is. A look of chagrin crossed Zero's face and he shook his head in self disgust. Knowing Kaname, he would obey. So how would he do it? Just take a cold shower or - or relieve himself by hand?

It doesn't matter! Stop wasting time and just go find him, insisted the voice. Zero set his jaw and made for the door.

_All right! I'm going to find him, OK? Satisf-_

Go!

Zero's scowl turned deeper and he wrenched open his room door. Without hesitation, he turned right and headed for the ornate double doors at the end of the long corridor. Kaname was in his room, he could feel it.

"Kaname?"

There was no answer when Zero reached the doors and rapped on the polished mahogany wood. He tried a couple more times, rapping his knuckles smartly on the door but there was still no answer. Zero sighed and glanced over his shoulder at the empty corridor behind him. He knew Kaname was in his room... but this villa was not Cross Academy. He was a guest here, not the host. Zero hesitated. One did not trespass on a pureblood's privacy especially after hurting his feelings but it was precisely because of that that he was here now...

Taking a chance on the trust their long years of friendship held and hoping it wouldn't cost him his head, Zero took a deep breath and turned the carved doorknob, the echo of anguish inside him growing stronger and stronger. The large room was luxuriously furnished and the wall lamps softly lit but Zero didn't spare the interior more than a passing glance. His attention was immediately caught by the unmistakable sound of the shower going on in the attached bathroom. A frown pulled Zero's eyebrows together as he absently pushed the room door closed behind him. So Kaname really was taking a cold shower then? Had he just started? It had to have been at least half an hour since he ran out earlier. Or had he just finished relieving himself and was -

Zero swallowed. He really didn't want to interrupt Kaname now but the sense of urgency and despair inside him made him toe off his sneakers anyway. He found himself walking towards the bathroom, his bare feet silent on the thick cream coloured carpet.

"Kaname?"

Zero halted by the open door. Perhaps he should just wait... but again the same urgency pulled at him, telling him not to. Zero stepped into the bathroom, the tiles cold and smooth under the soles of his feet. He could very well be killed for this but if he was, then he deserved it. Plain and simple.

"Kaname? Are you showering? I'm sorry for what I -"

Zero bit his lip. The bathroom was dark and he wanted to look Kaname in the eye when he apologised. It was the least he could do. Automatically his hand groped along the wall until he found the light switch and flicked it on. The resultant white light was gentle enough for vampire eyes but still brighter than the room lamps. Zero rounded the door and there he stopped short, his eyes widening and his mouth dropping open at the sight before him. Kaname was indeed in the roomy glass walled shower cubicle but he wasn't taking a bath. He was kneeling on the floor with his head bowed, dark wet tresses hanging over his face and obscuring his features. Zero was too shocked to realise how similar the pureblood's position was to his in his own room earlier. All he could think of was that unbelievably cruel as his words had been, they were still being followed to the letter. He swallowed in speechless dismay as this realisation gave the supposedly erotic sight in front of him a horrifying slant.

"Kaname...?"

The pureblood's name left Zero's lips in a whisper, his eyes fixed on the pale hand in Kaname's lap as it moved with intent, jerky yet autonomous movements that looked more painful than arousing.

"Kaname!"

The dark head didn't look up since the sound of the shower loud enough to obscure Zero's voice. He hesitated for just one more moment and then stepped purposefully into the shower cubicle, stopping just behind Kaname on his left. Thrusting his hand into the spray to get to the tap, Zero gasped as his arm was drenched in icy cold water. He found the tap and twisted it, shutting off the water. At least an inch of it had collected on the tiled floor and it was seeping into the hem of his jeans. Kaname gasped, head jerking up and dazed eyes snapping open.

"Z-Zero?" Kaname whispered, his eyes radiating pure heartbreak, his hand still punishing himself. The next moment, his mouth fell open in horror. Quickly, he shifted awkwardly to his right, the water on the floor sloshing around him as he hunched over, trying to hide himself from the stunned amethyst gaze.

"Zero, I - don't - don't look, don't look at me..."

Zero stared down at Kaname's long wet hair, suffering a sickening jolt of renewed guilt as he realised why the pale skin was mottled with goose bumps and had an almost bluish tinge to it. Dear God, how long had Kaname knelt under that icy water? The sudden silence of the bathroom was now broken only by the gurgle of the water going down the drain and Kaname's ragged breaths interspersed with soft hitching sobs. Zero swallowed hard. Dear God, how long had Kaname remained here like this trying to jerk himself off? Even hunched over with his hand covering his flesh, Zero could see that he was completely limp.

"No... stop that!"

Zero felt almost sick at the realisation that Kaname had taken his words literally after all. But how on earth could he or anyone have thought that he could relieve himself when he was so - so emotionally distressed? Zero bit his lip as he stared down at the broken pureblood. He couldn't help but recall the very first time he had bitten Kaname Kuran. So many years ago in that deserted classroom in Cross Academy, just as the Night Class were due to come out.

The moment of truth when Kaname asked Yuuki to choose between them and his and Zero's amazement when she picked a Level D about to slide into madness over the self assured pureblood on whom she had had a crush ever since she could remember.

Zero's eyes clenched shut, unstoppable images of that time shifting in his mind as if it had happened only yesterday. He sitting against the wall, broken and defeated with his body screaming for blood. Kaname kneeling gracefully in front of him, his dark eyes filled with understanding as he offered the most priceless thing he owned...

_Why?_

Kaname Kuran in Cross Academy had been a compelling, commanding and respected young pureblood. There was very little resemblance between the charismatic ex-Leader of the Moon Dorms and this broken, wet and hunched figure kneeling here now. Zero just couldn't understand _why. _What had happened during the past thirty odd years to make Kaname behave this way? Oh, he had grown so much more approachable and kind once it was clear he wasn't Zero's love rival but the older brother of Yuuki but that didn't at all explain the sheer disparity between what he was then and what he seemed to be now. Or had Zero just been too caught up in his own happy life and then mired in misery of late to notice anything but the polished surface Kaname displayed to the world at large?

_Why?_

Kaname gave a distressed sob and with a start, Zero cut off his confused musings. Now was not the time to think of that.

"Kaname," he started uncertainly.

I - I can't! I've been trying... so hard... but I c-can't! Go away, Zero. Don't... don't look, I - I'm not done yet."

Kaname's voice was soft, embarrassed and uncertain. Zero shook his head, his throat and heart aching with guilt and remorse. He felt like the biggest jerk in the world. How on earth had he managed to reduce his regal brother-in-law to this quivering tearful creature? It wasn't possible... and yet the proof was kneeling right here.

"Kaname, please stop," he begged hoarsely. "Don't do this..."

The dark head shook stubbornly and the pale hand did not stop its feverish work.

"I-I must," Kaname insisted, his breath hitching as he looked up again. The anguish in those red-rimmed eyes cut at Zero's heart and he shook his head, his lips thinning in self disgust. Kaname instantly took it to mean Zero was displeased with him. He hurriedly looked down and stroked himself even faster. Zero cursed.

"Kaname, stop it!" he hissed. "I didn't mean for you - stop that!"

It finally occurred to him that Kaname was not going to stop until he had accomplished what he was ordered to do, regardless of how long it took. Direct intervention was needed - Zero dropped onto his knees, hardly noticing the cold water soaking into the legs of his jeans. He caught hold of Kaname's right wrist with his right hand, trying to still those frantic motions and then swiftly increasing the strength of his grip on that fragile wrist as Kaname persisted in his useless stroking. Zero feared the pureblood would do himself an injury if he kept this up.

"Stop it, Kaname! Stop it!"

"I-I can't! Y-you said you never wanted to s-see me unless I..."

Kaname gave a soft, despairing sob and tried to pull Zero's hand off with his other hand. He was a pureblood but he was too distraught to think of using his strength. Zero bit his lip and exerted a bit more pressure, trying to still the desperate movements without injuring Kaname.

"I don't want you to do this. Stop it! Now!" he ordered sternly. With a sharp gasp, Kaname finally ceased. He knelt there shivering and panting softly, not daring to look up. Zero's heart continued to beat a rapid and painful tattoo inside his chest as he felt the cold fingers twitch inside his grasp.

"Listen to me. I don't want you to do this anymore, all right?" he said quietly. "Look at me, Kaname."

Kaname didn't react but Zero was nothing if not patient.

"Come on, look at me," he repeated and waited until finally the dark head slowly lifted. Kaname's face and lips were pale, his red rimmed eyes vaguely glassy looking. He was still sniffling and shivering.

"I don't want you to do this to yourself," Zero repeated firmly. Slowly, he let go of Kaname's wrist and hand and although the pureblood made a jerky movement, he did not resume his previous actions.

"That's better," Zero said softly, reassuringly. Kaname nodded in a numb sort of way, looking utterly defeated.

"I can't do it, Zero," he whispered. "I tried so hard but I couldn't..."

"No, it's OK," Zero replied past the huge lump in his throat. His heart felt like it was breaking inside him and he didn't know how much more of this torture he could take. He had felt guilty earlier but now this was ten thousand times worse. How could he have known that those careless words would affect Kaname so deeply, drive him to do something like this, with no thought whatsoever to his own pureblood pride or self esteem? Again, Zero couldn't help sparing a fleeting thought for that self assured young pureblood of his schooldays.

Kaname had looked down again, his pale shoulders slumped, his hands lying loosely on his lap. Zero sighed and roused himself. They could not stay here like this.

"Come on, let's get you out of here."

Zero waited but the dark, wet head stayed stubbornly down. Zero stood up.

"C'mon, Kaname, you're wet. I'm getting wet too."

When Kaname didn't look up or even give any indication that he had heard him, Zero decided he would just have to treat the pureblood like a child since he was rather behaving like one. He was comfortable playing the parental role and the words and actions came naturally to him, requiring little thought.

"All right, up you come."

Zero tugged on Kaname's left arm to make him stand. The pureblood stumbled as he arose, uttering a soft cry as his legs protested after having knelt on the cold tiled floor for so long. Zero pressed his lips together but remained silent . He kept one grip on Kaname's arm, steadying him as he reached for the neatly folded bath towel on the nearby rail with his other hand. He dried Kaname off, keeping his movements brisk to induce blood circulation... and to keep himself from staring at that naked form too much. Even cold, wet and shivering, Kaname was physically perfect. Zero couldn't help noticing that those nipples were tight again but from cold this time. He squeezed as much water as he could from those wavy locks and rubbed the ends briskly before wrapping the damp towel around Kaname's waist.

"Right, now let's get you out of here."

Kaname took a hesitant step when Zero tugged at his arm but he stumbled, his legs still numb. With a soft curse, Zero swung the pliant and sniffling pureblood into his arms and Kaname predictably burrowed into his shoulder. Zero was strong as a hunter and even stronger as a vampire who enjoyed regular intakes of pure blood. It was no effort at all to lift a male, especially one as slender as Kaname. Zero stepped out of the bathroom and moved towards the large bed, sitting gingerly at the foot of it with Kaname on his lap. The burning fist of shame in his chest was making it hard for him to breathe let alone think. He knew he was never _ever _going to forget the haunting desperation in Kaname's eyes as he knelt in the shower, water pelting down on him as he hopelessly tried to jerk himself off when he... couldn't.

_Oh God, I didn't know! I didn't know he would take my words so literally! Why would he _do_ that?_

A humourless smile twisted Zero's lips. He wished he knew why... and he wished he also knew why he cared so much about this person who fitted so beautifully into his arms. He wished he knew why this person was so different than the one he thought he had known for so long. A minute or so passed as Zero berated himself until a small hiccup finally interrupted his thoughts.

"Hey, you all right?" he whispered, instinctively dipping his head and pressing his lips to Kaname's wet hair. It felt like second nature to him by now to dust soft kisses on the pureblood's hair and damn, it wasn't at all fair that he always smelled this good. The head finally lifted and Kaname peeped almost shyly up at him.

"I'm sorry," he whispered almost tearfully. "I tried, I did, but I just... couldn't get..." he broke off and squirmed in Zero's lap, feeling an utter failure. He was a pureblood but he couldn't even get his body to obey him. Zero swallowed again, feeling worse than before. Why the hell was Kaname apologising to him? Because he felt as if he had failed you, that's why, whispered that voice inside his head, sounding subdued now.

"No. Don't ever say you're sorry, Kaname," Zero murmured, his voice thick with emotion. "I was the one who ordered you to-"

He broke off. If no one ordered a pureblood to do anything how was it that he was still very much alive? He blinked away the moisture filling his eyes and took a deep breath.

"You have nothing to apologise for, Kaname" he whispered fiercely. "You hear me? Nothing!"

Kaname only looked down and Zero pressed his lips to the wet hair again, unconsciously rocking the pureblood in his arms. Another minute of peaceful silence went by as Zero wracked his brains for a way to make it up to Kaname.

"Hey," he said at last. "Did you hear what I said?"

Again, Kaname slowly lifted his head. Zero read hurt, bewilderment and unbelievably, faint hope in those dark eyes as Kaname nodded slowly.

"I know, Zero," he whispered. "I know that this is not how I should - just that..."

He broke off and shrugged hopelessly, the gesture more eloquent than words. Zero pressed his lips tightly together. He didn't want this, damnit! He didn't want this unquestioning obedience, he didn't know what the hell to do with it! When he saw Kaname's face fell, he realised that the pureblood had misunderstood his facial expression once again. Zero sighed and offered Kaname a crooked but genuine half smile instead.

"Would you like me to bite you again? Just a little?" he whispered.

It was highly ironic that Zero could even presume such a thing instead of offering his own neck as penance but he knew this would give Kaname more pleasure and besides, what they had between them was hardly normal, was it? Kaname gave a shy but predictably eager nod at the word bite. He was being horribly pathetic again and he knew it... but right now, feeling physically and emotionally wrung out, snuggled in Zero's strong arms and feeling wanted and cared for again, he couldn't bring himself to care. He badly needed the hunter's closeness.

This time, Zero was very careful as he prepared Kaname's neck, piercing it as gently as he could and relieved when he heard the small whimper of pleasure that said all too well how welcome how his bite was. He didn't need to feed this time, it was only to comfort Kaname and nothing more. Zero grew more and more relieved as the pale trembling body in his arms relaxed with occasional murmurs of contentment reaching his ears. He hugged Kaname close, utilising his lips and tongue with all the skill he could muster. He had stopped thinking for the moment and the voice in his head was being helpfully silent, possibly enjoying the quiet intimacy between them. Thinking was a far too exhausting task and perhaps Zero realised he had thought enough over the past hour or so. He closed his eyes and concentrated on the very pleasant task he was engaged in, on the naked body pressed to his, on the soft breaths and minute shivers and the utterly gorgeous scent and taste of Kaname Kuran. After a while, Kaname shifted around, twisting towards Zero so that he could put his arms around the hunter's waist.

A few enjoyable minutes later, Zero's senses registered the slight change in Kaname's breathing pattern. The soft inhalations were becoming shallower and faster and even his scent had changed a little. Zero's eyes blinked open hazily, wondering if he had taken enough for now. He started to pull his fangs free and paused, a slight movement having caught his eye. The corner of Kaname's towel that he had tucked in earlier had worked loose when the pureblood twisted around on his lap, causing the damp cloth to fall open. Kaname's groin was fully exposed and he was once again getting aroused. Zero's eyes widened involuntarily as he took in the sight. He hadn't looked at another male's private parts except for his late twin brother's when they were both young and of course his own sons' when he had washed and bathed them when they were little but Kaname's... instead of the expected disgust or revulsion, all Zero felt was a surprised sort of amazement. Before he could stop himself, he was employing his tongue more actively, intrigued to see its effect on Kaname. He wasn't disappointed in the least - Kaname shivered in his arms with a soft moan and grew even more erect.

Never in a million years had Zero ever imagined he would enjoy looking at an unclothed male but Kaname was... _beautiful_. The velvety looking skin enclosing that long shaft was as creamy pale as the rest of him but the head was round, fully exposed and beautifully flushed. Zero continued staring, he could not find one thing to fault - the size, length, and angle - everything about Kaname was just perfect and just... just _beautiful_. There was that dratted word again but it felt right. Zero found himself suddenly fascinated with the head of that proud erection, particularly the drop of clear liquid beading so tantalisingly on the very, very tip. He absently slid his fangs free, completely fixated on that drop of clear liquid.

Kaname lifted his head from Zero's shoulder as he felt the fangs leave his neck. He opened his eyes and peeped up at Zero, a protest right on his lips when he realised what those crimson toned eyes were staring at and very raptly as well. Kaname's gaze followed and immediately a hot flush of shame flooded his face and neck, travelling swiftly down his chest. He hadn't been able to get a reaction from his body earlier tried as he might but now he was hard and worse, fully exposed with the towel lying wide open on either side of him!

"I-I'm sorry!" Kaname apologised hastily as he started to scramble down from Zero's lap, horribly aware of his aroused state. He was frightened of how Zero might react even though the hunter hadn't thrown him off his lap. All Kaname knew was that he had to hide himself before something else happened. He struggled to stand up and finally realised why he couldn't - the strong arm tightening around his shoulders and the hand clamping down on his right knee effectively prevented his escape. Kaname uttered a small gasp of surprise as he looked up, his heart racing frantically in his chest. He fully expected to see some sort of disgust or repulsion on Zero's face but found only a predatory interest that made his mouth suddenly dry.

Time slowed down to a crawl as the two of them locked gazes. Zero opened his mouth once or twice as if to say something only to close it and shake his head instead. Kaname was breathing in tiny hitching gasps, his body taut and quivering with both awareness and arousal. Modesty had vanished for now, shyness had taken a backseat. With the intent way Zero was looking at him, Kaname knew that he must keep silent no matter what because the hunter was obviously teetering on the brink of a decision, one that would affect them both. Kaname waited, barely breathing as he prayed for Zero to make the decision that would _not_ crush his beleaguered heart. In reality it couldn't have been more than half a minute or so but it seemed like an eternity before Zero finally spoke.

"Kaname, can I... touch you?" His voice was hesitant but there was nothing at all unsure about his gaze. He wasn't going to take no for an answer. Kaname's mouth fell open as he stared at the hunter.

"Y-yes," he managed to get out of his tight throat, his blush deepening when he felt himself twitch, growing a few millimeters longer.

"You sure?" Zero asked and Kaname gulped, nodding.

"Yes," he repeated more firmly this time. Oh God, did Zero think he could even say no?

"All right," Zero replied quietly. Kaname almost reeled in delight. He gasped again when something rubbed across the tip of his sensitive swollen head, sending a hard shiver all the way down to his toes. Then a firm warmth engulfed his length. Kaname glanced down distractedly to see Zero's hand wrapped around him.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Kaname," the hunter said in a low voice, the reassuring words making Kaname shiver even more. He nodded fervently.

"I know," he said breathlessly. "I know, Zero. Touch me..."

Zero's left hand started moving and Kaname shivered again. He couldn't believe that Zero was actually touching him, holding him, stroking him! Kaname's speedy healing had caused all tenderness from his earlier abuse to vanish and he reveled in the toe curling pleasure and rapidly building warmth in his lower abdomen. Zero's hold was firm, his strokes sure and deliberate. Kaname shivered in pure delight, his fingers tightening around the hunter's back and digging into his muscles.

And all too soon... it stopped. Kaname's eyes snapped open and he voiced an immediate protest.

"Shush," Zero whispered. He hadn't wanted to stop but Kaname was sitting at a rather awkward angle and he wanted to touch more of him.

"Open your legs," Zero whispered. Kaname blushed but complied at once, letting his right leg fall past Zero's knee.

"Good," the hunter purred as he smiled into Kaname's wide eyes which widened still further as his scrotum was wrapped in warmth. Zero's left hand started a gentle massaging stimulation as his right hand reached around and grasped Kaname instead.

"Oohh...!" Kaname pressed his face into Zero's right shoulder and shuddered. He hadn't known that that part of his anatomy was so sensitive...! Zero's breaths were coming out quickly past his lips. Pleasuring Kaname like this was far more fascinating than he had ever thought it would be but it wasn't enough. He wanted to see more... more of Kaname. He also wanted to give more to him. He wanted - heaven help him - he wanted to see Kaname completely undone. In his hands. At this moment, Zero was too enraptured by the pureblood to wonder at his completely off tangent thoughts and the little voice inside his head was now so silent it might have even gagged itself.

"Hang on," Zero muttered. Before Kaname could even start to think of what those two words could possibly mean, Zero released him and slipped his arms under the pureblood's armpits instead. A sharp indrawn breath hissed past Kaname's ear and Zero exerted himself, lifting the pureblood bodily and pulling him towards the left at the same time. Kaname ended up straddling Zero with one pale slender leg falling on either side of the denim clad thighs and his bare back pressed flush against the other's heaving chest. The damp towel had slid onto the carpet, unnoticed and forgotten.

"Ahh, much better!" Zero growled. He slid his hands downward past Kaname's flat abdomen and grunted in satisfaction as they closed over their respective treasures, his left hand full of something soft and malleable, his right full of hot, hard twitching length.

"Aaahh...!" Kaname cried out again, his head shifting restlessly against Zero's shoulder as the hunter's hands moved again, relentlessly, firmly, determinedly. Zero had never pleasured a male before let alone have such thoughts but he was skillful. It was instinct... or perhaps an innate sense of knowing what would feel good. Kaname had felt so cold earlier but now he was burning with pleasure, a faint sheen of moisture appearing on his skin. He panted as he dug slender, shaky fingers into Zero's sides for leverage so that he could thrust his hips up, legs falling open even wider in his desperation to give Zero everything he had... and get paradise in return.

Zero rested his chin on Kaname's right shoulder, greedily staring at the engorged length filling his fist, the erotic sounds of Kaname's moans and pants filling his ears, the scent of his perspiration and arousal filling his senses... teasing him, tempting him, making him want the impossible. Kaname's desperate fingers were bruising his hips and his buttocks were shifting restlessly, unintentionally stimulating Zero's own length with the friction of the jeans between their bodies but the hunter was oblivious to it all. He was wholly focused on this quivering, utterly enchanting creature in his arms and he wanted to give him the golden, glorious finish he was desperate for. Kaname thrust his hips up higher, pushing himself into Zero's grip with despairing moans and the latter couldn't help but respond to that beautiful desperation, lifting his thumb and rubbing the pad of it firmly over the swollen, slick head. Kaname was leaking freely and the beads of clear slippery moisture rolling ceaselessly down from the small slit had already coated Zero's fingers and palm.

"Nnnhhh! M-more...!" Kaname cried out, pressing back hard against Zero and almost sending the hunter falling backwards onto the bed. Zero braced his back and speeded up, pumping the pureblood hard now, knowing he was nearing his orgasm. Kaname's taut, quivering body was aching with tension and he longed for the shocking, rippling bliss of release... but a part of his mind held him back, still fearful of Zero's possible rejection. It was the hunter's hand pleasuring him now but his earlier words had cut Kaname deeply and his body recognised that fear.

"Ze-Zero? I - I can't..."

"You can, Kaname. You _can_."

"B-but I - uh... you said..."

"No buts, Kaname."

"I... I don't... ahh... I don't want - I c-can't -"

"I want you to. Come on, Kaname, come for me. Don't hold back," Zero coaxed breathlessly in his ear, his hand still continuing its furious work. And somehow, that did it. Those reassuring words were exactly what Kaname needed to hear now, to get past the barrier erected in his mind. His ears heard the words, his mind deciphered them and his body gratefully obeyed and surrendered to the inevitable. There was a deafening moment when everything just hung suspended for Kaname, when he was caught up in a teetering moment of unbearable, tension filled waiting... and then Zero's tight grip moved firmly from the base of his arousal right to the very tip... and Kaname just exploded.

"Aahhhh!" he screamed as he came, his body convulsing on Zero's lap, legs wide apart and pressing down hard onto the hunter's thighs, feet wrapped tightly around the other's calves. Kaname's body rejoiced in its release, expelling his seed out in creamy forceful spurts that arched gracefully onto the hunter's hands, their tangled legs and the carpet below.

"... aahh... aahh!" Kaname's thrilled screams of ecstasy continued as Zero's strong lightly calloused hand dragged him mercilessly through his orgasm, forcing him to relish every shudder, every pulse and every glorious, ripping exploding moment of it. Kaname couldn't think, had stopped breathing in fact. Every fibre of his being was just focused on feeling the shuddering waves of surely the most amazing orgasm he had ever experienced in his life.

Zero's back was aching with the strain of supporting his own weight along with Kaname's for the past several minutes. Still pumping the twitching shaft in his fist, he fell backwards onto the bed, Kaname bonelessly following his descent. Zero automatically turned onto his right side, wrapping his left hand around the pureblood's heaving chest as he continued to milk the rest of Kaname's stunning orgasm from him. The pureblood was still convulsing, soft cries of bliss falling unheeded from his lips as he leaked the last of his passion onto Zero's fingers and the bedspread. At length, Zero ceased his movements and gathered the naked, shivering pureblood into his arms, pulling him as close as he could. He was aching for release himself but Kaname just felt too good to let go. The two of them lay quietly there for a few minutes, catching their breaths. Kaname was still trembling as he slowly drifted down from the incredible high of his release and Zero hugged him tightly. There was an odd ache in his heart and a disturbing deja vu feeling... that this was both impossibly right and yet so wrong.

"Hey, you OK?" he finally asked. The dark head nodded but Kaname didn't turn around. A frown creased Zero's forehead.

"Here, turn around, Kaname. Let me see you," he coaxed but Kaname only shook his head. He pressed his back closer to Zero's chest but turned his face the other way, burying it in the hunter's right shoulder instead. When Zero lifted his head to look over, all he could see was a portion of creamy cheek that was attractively flushed. He smiled softly, guessing that Kaname was now feeling somewhat shy after that spectacularly abandoned display.

"It's all right," he whispered. He cuddled Kaname closer to him and buried his face in the damp waves of his hair, breathing in deeply. Kaname always smelled good but now, he smelled even better. Holding him once again felt more right then wrong and Zero sighed tiredly, closing his eyes. He didn't want to think. It would only confuse him more. Half a minute later, he realised to his chagrin that his arousal was not going anywhere. His jeans were uncomfortably tight and wet from knee to hem besides. With his body demanding release, Zero sighed and regretfully shifted away from Kaname. The pureblood immediately uttered a small sound of protest and Zero patted the bare arm nearest to him.

"Shh, you rest here," he soothed. "I'll be back in a couple of minutes, OK?"

Zero slid from the warm bed and hurried into the bathroom. He stood in front of the toilet and unzipped his jeans, impatiently kicking them off. He began pumping his engorged erection hard with one hand, bracing his other on the tiles in front of him. Almost instinctively, he brought to mind Kaname's delicious responses from earlier and felt himself stiffen even more. The coil of sexual tension low in his groin was already tightly wound. Zero hadn't realised until now how much he had missed the shuddering, tension releasing bliss of an orgasm, even one that was self administered. His breath hissed sharply past his teeth as he got close and closer to his goal, feeling the familiar weakening tremble start in his limbs.

In the bedroom, Kaname lay quietly. He registered the shifting of the mattress shifted as Zero sat up and then left the bed. Kaname felt incredibly sated and yet... extremely shy at the same time. That was a passionate, even wanton display he had put on just now and even though it had been a mind blowing experience, he feared what Zero would think of him now. The hunter may have been caught up in the moment but once he cooled down, would he be utterly disgusted with his brother-in-law's behaviour regardless of having caused it in the first place? Kaname worried his lower lip as he wondered what to say. The next moment, he sat up. His sensitive ears had picked up the faint sounds of Zero's harsh breathing and it suddenly occurred to Kaname what his beloved had to be doing in the bathroom.

- o -

Zero leaned forward and rested his damp forehead on the cool tiles in front of him, his chest heaving. He had dug his teeth into his lower lip in order not to make a sound when he came. Closing his eyes, he lost himself in the afterglow of release and let his heart slow down. It had been too long... and he relished the exhausted tremble of his limbs just as he relished the relaxed feel of his muscles and feel good endorphins bouncing around inside him. When a pair of slender arms snaked around his waist from the back and a warm body pressed against his back, Zero jumped.

"Geez, Kaname!" he rasped. "You startled me!"

"Hey, I wanted to help you with that," Kaname pouted, his voice taking on an unconsciously sexy sleepy slant. Zero took a deep breath and let it out with a whoosh. He glanced down just in time to see a pale hand trail dangerously low over his abdomen and caught it before it could reach his still firm length. Pushing Kaname's hand aside, Zero whipped one of the clean neatly folded towels from the basket on the counter, shook it out and wrapped it swiftly around his hips before turning around.

"You don't have to. I'm done," he replied firmly, ignoring Kaname's disappointed pout that reshaped into a small 'o' of surprise as he was admiringly appraised from disheveled hair all the way down to slender feet and bare toes. Zero smiled when he saw the pureblood's sculpted cheekbones warm with colour and the dark eyes dart elsewhere.

"Go on, get back into bed," Zero admonished. "You need to rest."

Kaname blushed and wished he had thought to put on something but he turned around obediently and went back into the bedroom, treating Zero to a very nice view of his toned rear. Zero suppressed a groan when his body twitched at the sight. At the foot of the bed, Kaname turned around and impulsively caught his hand.

"Stay with me," he requested, pulling Zero towards the bed. The hunter hesitated. He wanted to get back to his room to think through what he had just done but the note of pleading in Kaname's voice weakened his resolve.

"I need clean clothes," he muttered but Kaname shook his head stubbornly.

"Later. Stay with me, Zero," he said simply. The silent plea in those dark eyes made it impossible for Zero to say no and his shoulders slumped in defeat.

"For a while," he agreed, smiling ruefully as the dark eyes lit up. Zero sighed as he slid under the cool silk sheets after Kaname. He had had a good rest earlier but it felt good to lie down and put off thinking for a while longer... and it felt even better to spoon Kaname from behind who once again melted into his arms as if he belonged there. The pureblood yawned as he pulled Zero's arms more firmly around his waist. He felt utterly exhausted physically, mentally and emotionally. He knew there were issues he needed to work out with Zero... but they could wait for a while. Right now, all that mattered was that he was being held by his beloved hunter in the way he had dreamt of for so long.

"Stay here with me, Zero," he whispered, his heavy eyelids closing.

_Don't you ever leave my side._

- Chapter End -


	21. Chapter 21: The Agreement

**Author Notes:** Hello everyone! Sorry for this late update, I've been busier than before but I promise I'll have lots more free time come June _-hugs herself in glee-_ Thank you so very much for all your reviews, favourites and alerts. This next chapter's necessary but pretty boring, I fear. Oh well, it's late and I have to post and get some sleep so I hope you enjoy it all the same. Happy Mother's Day to all you wonderful mothers out there! Cheers.

San Juanita, I hope you enjoy this chapter too! :D

- Chapter Start -

Kaname fell asleep within minutes but Zero wasn't so fortunate. His body was at peace after that long awaited release but there was too much turmoil in his heart to find any sort of rest. He was confused, embarrassed, exasperated and utterly chagrined all at the same time.

_So much for wanting to avoid any further closeness with Kaname...! _

Honestly, if what he had just done to Kaname was not 'closeness', then Zero obviously had no idea what the word meant. He pressed his lips tightly together, trying very hard not to remember that he had just sexually pleasured another male. It was something he had never before in his whole life even imagined and yes, it was the revered, respected and very attractive Kaname Kuran who was, just by the way, addicted to his bite. The pleased snicker inside his head just made it all the more embarrassing. Well really, it seemed to say, is there another male you wanted to pleasure?

Zero groaned silently, wishing it would leave his head and leave him the hell alone.

_Crap. Why was all of this happening?_

Why was it that each time he was resolved to take one step back, he ended up closer to Kaname than before? Look at what had just happened, for Pete's sake! Even now, Zero was practically wrapped around the pureblood's naked form with only a towel separating their lower bodies - one didn't get much closer than that, did they? Zero took a fortifying breath and groaned silently again as he took in the sweet, slightly musky scent of Kaname's passion lingering in the air and on the sheets. It only made a fresh wave of embarrassment flood Zero's face and neck, leaving him agitated and befuddled. What was even more shocking was that the thought itself didn't disgust him at all.

_It should! Why didn't it?_

Zero gritted his teeth, on the verge of shouting out his frustration. His body tensed for a moment and Kaname shifted in his arms. Zero froze but the pureblood didn't awake. With a resigned sigh, Zero sagged onto the sheets and shut his eyes. He tried to push his jumbled thoughts away and tried to make himself more comfortable but sleep continued to elude him. The fragrance of the damp silky locks teasing his nose and the smooth warmth of the body in his arms were enough to make his body stir with interest. Zero pushed the thought away abruptly. He had accepted the fact that biting Kaname was sexually arousing particularly with the latter's adorable responses but right now he was only holding the pureblood - surely there was absolutely no reason to feel anything!

Zero huffed and ground his teeth in frustration. His thoughts were getting him nowhere at all. Finally, he gave up on rest. Ignoring the pureblood's earlier entreaty to stay with him - and Zero was honest enough to admit to himself that part of his heart had melted at that particular phrase, having brought up three children who like all others were experts in wheedling - he carefully eased himself away. It was proof of how deeply Kaname was sleeping that he didn't even stir. Perhaps he had once again been burning the candle at both ends for the past week and was just plain exhausted but the fact remained that he trusted Zero and the small ache in the hunter's heart persisted as he got out of bed.

_Why? Why did Kaname choose to trust me and obey me this much? I'm nobody!_

Frowning deeply, Zero went to retrieve his crumpled jeans from the bathroom. He stepped over Kaname's clothes and walked back into the room, purposely avoiding looking at the large bed as he walked past it. Halfway, he grimaced when his right foot encountered a suspiciously damp patch on the carpet. Scowling, he shoved his feet into his sneakers, hitched the towel higher up his hips and hastened to the door. He opened it a crack and peeped out. The long corridor was empty as he had suspected. That was good - he couldn't imagine looking Seiren in the eye if she caught him coming out from Kaname's room clad only in a towel, holding a soiled pair of jeans in his hand and wearing a hot flush on his face.

_It might pull an interesting reaction from her though... _

As Zero escaped to his room to clean up, he wondered - hypothetically of course - if the embarrassment would be worth the risk of seeing her surprise. Kaname had asked him to stay but there was no telling how long he would sleep and Zero wanted to be alone. He needed to be alone to sort out the mess in his head before he next saw Kaname otherwise he was afraid he would lash out again in his confusion or worse, indulge in a repeat of what had just happened. Besides, he needed another shower and of all things, he was hungry again! Zero sighed as he whipped off the towel and stepped into the shower stall. Kaname's blood could work wonders - it could heal, strengthen and arouse... but it couldn't fill him up. Zero glanced at his waterproof watch, ignoring the implications of what an interest in food actually signified to him. He didn't want to think in that direction right now.

Well, it was ten past nine at night - too early for another meal even though he knew that all he had to do was head down to the kitchens to get something to eat. He showered briskly with hot water, pushing away the painful, guilt laced memories of seeing Kaname kneeling in his own bathroom earlier. Zero forced his thoughts along more mundane things... such as what he would like to eat and how he was going to pass the time while waiting for Kaname to wake up. Perhaps he could take in a movie; Kaname had mentioned an indoor cinema on the top floor. Or he could walk down to the village to see what if had to offer. Still musing on this, Zero dried off and wore back the same long sleeved T-shirt he had cast down on the bed earlier and a clean pair of slacks. Perhaps he would just go for a walk on the grounds instead - the night air might help clear his head. Zero nodded to himself and ignored the disappointed rumbling of his stomach as he made his way downstairs. When he reached the bottommost stair, Seiren materialised out of nowhere as was her habit. Zero just only managed not to look startled.

"Would you like something to eat, Kiryuu-san?" she asked in her usual expressionless voice. Zero blinked, wondering if she had read his mind... or merely heard his stomach growling.

"Yeah," he admitted. "I was just going to check out this place," he added, gesturing vaguely at the front door. Seiren nodded as if it were a perfectly logical thing to do.

"I'll have coffee brought out to the barbeque area - it's at the back of the villa. There's also freshly baked apple pie," she offered. Zero could feel his mouth starting to water.

"Thank you," he accepted with a small smile. Seiren was an excellent bodyguard and a definite mind reader then. Zero found himself uneasily hoping she wouldn't ask him where Kaname was. He had no idea how to answer that one.

_Oh, he's sleeping, Seiren. Physically and mentally exhausted after I bit him, teased him, flung abuse at him, fished him out of the shower, sat him on my lap and gave him an apparently mind blowing -_

That stupid flush was starting up again. Zero quickly nodded at Seiren and moved towards the front door before she could sense his agitation.

- o -

As expected, the grounds of the villa were spacious, beautiful and well cared for. The tress and flowering bushes all bore the results of being lovingly tended. Zero pushed his hands into his pockets, looking around him as he strolled along the smoothly pebbled pathway, softly lit by shaded garden lights on each side. The path led past a small man-made river over which there was a bridge and even a tiny gazebo on the other side. Zero smiled wryly - trust Kaname to hire the best landscaping artist for his property! A moment later, his smile faded as a sense of melancholy settled lightly over him. Yuuki would have loved coming here... and Yuko and the boys...

Resolutely, Zero pushed the thought away. He rounded the corner and ambled on until he came to the barbeque area. It was large enough to comfortably accommodate a party of twenty. There were six wooden picnic tables with benches situated around the circular pit. Zero sank down onto the nearest bench and looked around, absently thinking that he should have brought along his jeans jacket to ward off the night chill. A few moments later, he heard the soft sound of a door opening nearby. A maid approached him bearing a tray. Zero smelled the mouth watering aroma of freshly brewed coffee and buttery pastry as she set the tray down in front of him with a polite greeting. He thanked her and poured a cup of the black coffee before tucking into the generous slice of apple pie. It was delicious. The golden pastry was so light and flaky, it practically melted on his tongue. The filling was piping hot, sweet and redolent with cinnamon. Despite the confusion in his heart, Zero polished off the large slice in six minutes flat. He put the fork down on the empty plate with a satisfied sigh and poured himself more coffee. Cradling the warm cup between his palms, he tried to attend to the jumbled thoughts in his head.

All right, so he had just given a hand job to Kaname Kuran - pureblood, business tycoon and his brother-in-law, and been given full permission too right after shouting insults at him. Just how did one top that, really? Zero shook his head, still bemused by his actions. Slowly, he released the coffee cup and stared at the calloused palms of his hands as if he had never seen them before. They had both been very intimate with Kaname's body earlier and he still couldn't quite wrap his mind around it as well as the fact that the memory _still_ didn't arouse any feelings of disgust... just a certain degree of embarrassment and a very annoying return of sexual interest. Zero scowled and shifted on the hard bench. So much for not wanting them to get close! Something had obviously gone very wrong somewhere. Exactly where, he wasn't too sure.

A plaintive meow interrupted his exasperated thoughts and he looked up, caught off guard for the second time in less than half an hour. A pair of round eyes that softly reflected the nearest garden light were watching him from behind a bush next to a smaller path that most likely led to the kitchens. It would certainly make it easier to transport food and dishes to the barbeque area and do the cleaning up after.

"Hey there," Zero called out softly, his lips automatically curving into a soft smile. He had been turned into a vampire at age twelve but that had never stopped animals - herbivores or carnivores - from taking a liking to him. He spared a fleeting, wistful thought for the late White Lily of his schooldays, the large ferocious mare who terrorised everyone except him. He had thought she was an exception only to find out later on that that wasn't the case - not by a long shot. Now, Zero watched with resigned amusement as his latest unintentional 'conquest' came padding out from behind the bush, meowing softly as if it were a starved and neglected stray.

"Want some company, do you?" he murmured wryly as the snowy white female approached him. He waited patiently as it delicately sniffed at the hem of his slacks. Finally she looked up at him with her head cocked to one side as if to say 'you'll do' and then leapt up lightly onto the bench. She climbed into his lap with the air of one who wasn't going to leave anytime soon and proceeded to make herself comfortable. Zero chuckled softly, looking her over as he ran a gentle finger down the back of her head. She was obviously tame and well fed so she probably belonged to one of the staff here. He sighed and started stroking the silky fur on her back as he continued pondering over the latest development in his relationship with Kaname and what he would say when they next met. Kaname had been unsurprisingly docile earlier but Zero had no doubt his pureblood pride would surface sooner or later. Kaname Kuran might be the most - all right, the only - approachable pureblood he had ever known but he was also a successful businessman and could be ruthless enough when he had to. He would probably be justifiably furious at Zero after a good rest and the hunter unconsciously squared his shoulders at the thought. He deserved Kaname's anger... but even thinking about that couldn't erase the deep satisfaction he had felt in bringing about the pureblood's sexual release earlier. Just recalling how Kaname had looked and felt like on his lap, just bringing to mind those soft moans, passionate writhing about and unashamed thrusting of those slim hips culminating in those ecstatically voiced screams were enough to make Zero a little hot under the collar... and more than a little hard between the legs.

Damn, who could have ever guessed that under that gracious, composed and picture perfect exterior of Kaname Kuran lay such a tempting and wanton creature begging to be undone like that? Zero found himself grinning in a rather embarrassed fashion. Kaname had obviously enjoyed that and Zero had to admit it wasn't any hardship to himself either. It looked like he would have to be very careful the next time he bit Kaname otherwise the same thing just might happen again. The question was, would Kaname expect it to happen? And more importantly, did Zero want it to?

He looked up and stared unseeingly into the dark surroundings, his hand absently continuing its slow stroking of the cat's fur, feeling the soft vibration of her purring. Even without thinking too hard about it, he knew the answer to that. Zero shook his head in self disgust. So much for wanting to keep his distance... he was getting in well over his head despite the promises he had made to himself - that if any feelings of lust arose during their biting sessions, they would take care of it. By themselves. In private. After all, Yuuki was no longer here... Zero ignored the bittersweet ache in his heart and the familiar sting in his eyes. Well, he had kept his promise in a way - he had used his own hand to bring himself release but only after taking care of Kaname. Frankly, what on earth would the pureblood think of him now?

One minute declaring that nothing of this nature was to happen and the next, initiating it himself.

One minute promising that what they had was just a platonic arrangement and the next, teasing Kaname to get the most adorable reactions from him.

One minute insisting that any 'feelings' were to be resolved in private and the next, literally giving Kaname a hand.

It was no wonder the pureblood was confused! It was no wonder that Zero himself was confused. He sighed, nowhere near finding a solution than before. He had no idea how long he sat there in the cool air and on that hard bench... but at length, the cat on his lap stiffened and raised its head. Zero looked up, his senses belatedly warning him of Seiren's quiet presence. She was standing about twelve feet away. The cat immediately jumped gracefully down from Zero's lap and gave Seiren a disdainful look before stalking away. Zero suppressed a grin when it looked back at his lap with a rather wistful look - he had no doubt she would accost him again later... when Seiren wasn't anywhere around.

"Kaname-sama is at the balcony on the first floor, the place where you had lunch yesterday," Seiren said quietly. Zero nodded before glancing at his watch, startled to find two hours had gone by without him realising it. Like it or not, it was time to face the music. He dutifully got to his feet. Despite his outward calm, his heart had started beating a little faster. He had behaved differently in the heat of the moment and so had Kaname. Now that they had both cooled down, it was time for him to tender a proper apology... and find out how things stood between them now.

- o -

Zero walked through the dining room and quietly opened the door that led outside despite knowing that Kaname would have already detected his presence long before. The balcony was lit with the same golden lights that illuminated the garden. Zero's eyes found Kaname instantly. The pureblood was dressed in a long sleeved cream coloured silk shirt left untucked over dark wool trousers. He stood at the balcony with his left hand resting gracefully on the carved stone railing and his right in his trouser pocket as he stared out at the darkened valley, seemingly unaware that he wasn't alone. Zero paused at the door and gazed at that perfect profile silhouetted against the night sky. He had found out so many things about Kaname in the past couple of months but right now, he felt as if he didn't know him at all.

Half a minute ticked by... and then the other half. Still, Kaname didn't move and Zero kept silent, trying to ignore the questions still chasing around inside his mind. He finally took a deep breath and stepped out onto the stone floor. As if that was the cue for him to move, Kaname slowly pivoted around to look at him. The look they gave each other this time was wary. Almost immediately, the air thickened with tension as the intimacy they had indulged in earlier loomed over them, adding to the awkwardness. What had happened in Kaname's room was so sudden, so profound... neither man knew what to say.

Zero swallowed as he continued to stare at Kaname as if mesmerised. The pureblood's face was as perfect as ever but it was the look in his eyes that made Zero's heart skip a beat. The dark chocolate pools were no longer warm and open. They were cool. Remote. Distant. Zero opened his mouth... and closed it again. He really wanted to apologise for his behaviour earlier but the almost stern look on Kaname's face left him strangely tongue tied and awkward.

In the end, it was Kaname who broke the silence.

"Zero. Did you rest well?" he asked quietly, the tone of his voice unfailingly polite and courteous. Zero almost flinched. He dug his hands into his jeans pockets, shoulders hunching over a little. A part of him wasn't surprised at encountering this distant stranger, knowing that Kaname's pride would surface sooner or later but the other part of him had rather hoped to meet the blushing, clingy pureblood of before.

"Uh, a little," he lied. This Kaname looked like a person he didn't know. Where was that flushed, passionate, vulnerable and utterly enchanting creature who had writhed about so passionately on his lap just a few hours ago? Zero closed his eyes briefly, cursing his traitorous thoughts. He had to stop thinking of Kaname that way! It was ironic how he had gone on for months now without once thinking of his physical needs but could be so easily turned on by the memory of what he had done to Kaname earlier. Zero had a sinking feeling that his body was now programmed to act in this utterly mortifying way.

_Damnit...! _

He cursed silently again, feeling his face warm with telltale colour. It was horrible timing - he could tell his reaction wasn't appropriate right this minute. Kaname's chin had lifted a notch, delicate nostrils flaring, slender fingers tightening on the railing. It was obvious he knew what Zero was feeling and why. Before the hunter could think of what to say, Kaname spoke again.

"What you said to me earlier... that was unacceptable."

Kaname's tone was still quiet but the tone had gone icy. The sudden flash of anger in those usually warm brown eyes made Zero blink. It wasn't totally unexpected but it still made him want to shrivel up with guilt. With an effort, he forced himself to stand up straight and to meet that remote gaze head on. Kaname's back was even straighter, the tilt of his head regal... haughty. He looked both proud and furious. There was a reddish glow to his eyes that Zero didn't care to see. The angry aura pulsing in his hunter senses told him that Kaname was holding it in check but just barely.

"Kaname," Zero began awkwardly, "look, earlier I-"

"I don't ever want to hear you speak to me that way again," Kaname interrupted him, each one of those perfectly enunciated words falling from his lips like jagged chips of ice. Zero felt his face flush hot. His heart was pounding inside his chest. The hunter in him rebelled at spoken to like this, and by a pureblood. It insisted that he wasn't to step down from this challenge. It didn't like the unpleasant memories those words brought surging back. The last time Kaname had told Zero off was over thirty years ago but in an instant, he felt like he was back at Cross Academy again, an angry and desperate sixteen years old grappling with his unending need for blood. Zero's eyes narrowed, amethyst gaining a faint crimson hue. Righteous anger was building inside him. He never asked to be turned into a vampire. He hated taking blood and he hated being scolded for it. Scolded for taking what Yuuki freely offered with no strings attached.

_Yuuki..._

Zero gasped. A sudden shiver shook him hard and he squeezed his eyes shut. Yuuki... Nothing but that precious, _precious_ name could have touched him then. It called to him softly but insistently and it reached inside him with loving gentleness, surrounding his pounding heart with familiar warmth. In an instant, Zero's anger evaporated, leaving only remorse in its wake. He took a deep breath and ran a none too steady hand over his face.

_Yuuki..._

The girl he loved most in the world had looked up to this pureblood as her saviour and as her onii-san, her cherished and respected older brother. Kaname Kuran wasn't just family to them all. He was their benefactor and their protector. He was the beloved uncle of Yuko, Ichiru and Isamu. He was the reason why Zero was still alive and sane. But most importantly...

_Yuuki would never want us to fight. Besides, Kaname is right. I went too far. If it were anyone other than him..._

Zero knew he would already be dead. It looked like he wasn't going to be physically punished after all but he was definitely being verbally flayed. It was embarrassing and a bitter pill to swallow but Kaname had every right to say that despite what the annoyed hunter in Zero might think. Slowly, he opened his eyes. It was an effort to meet Kaname's gaze but he did it anyway. Kaname shook his head, his unblinking stare pinning Zero to the spot, making the latter feel even more tongue tied and awkward.

"I don't want to pretend that your bite doesn't do anything to me, Zero. I refuse to pretend anymore."

Contrary to the previous time when he had shyly stammered out his craving, Kaname's voice was now as steady as his gaze. It had a ring of finality to it, almost as if he were issuing a warning - take it or leave it. Slowly, Zero nodded.

"I know," he replied as steadily as he could. "I under-"

Once again, Kaname appeared not to have heard him for he went on speaking.

"In any case, I - I _can't_ pretend. Not anymore," he added. The note of almost desperate frustration in his voice tugged at Zero hard. Impulsively, he took a step forward.

"Kaname - "

"I don't want to have to put up a front. Not in front of you, Zero. I - I just..."

Kaname broke off and shook his head, a look of intense frustration crossing his face. With a soft groan, he swung around, turning his back on Zero once more and gripping the railing with both hands. He was trying desperately to hold onto his control. He had planned every single word he was to say when Zero appeared. He had held himself in perfect control then but almost as soon as he opened his mouth, it all started to go downhill. He hated seeing the guilt on his beloved hunter's face, he hated causing the shocked dismay in those beautiful amethyst eyes, he hated sounding as if he were angry at Zero... when the truth was that he was more hurt than angry. Kaname gulped in breath after breath of the cool air, struggling to maintain his composure. It was the hardest thing he had ever done, keeping himself cold and aloof when what he wanted was to throw himself into the hunter's arms. He was so shiveringly, desperately, _achingly_ aware of the person standing behind him that he could barely speak.

_Do you know what I'm trying to say, Zero? Do you know that I... that I'm begging you right now?_

To Kaname, just trying to make his stand like this was so much more difficult than - than negotiating a tricky contract or solving a problem involving many different parties or brainstorming for a solution. He could run his business with his eyes closed simply because his emotions weren't involved but with Zero, every part of him was involved - his heart, body and soul. He wanted so much for Zero to love him and care for him but at the same time, he didn't want a situation where he had to accept whatever insults the hunter close to fling at him. He knew that Zero had only said those things because he felt betrayed by his own body but Kaname just couldn't take it. He was floundering in the dark. He didn't know how he and Zero could come to an amicable agreement where he could get what he wanted without sounding like he was begging... or sounding like he was issuing a command either. He just wanted Zero to understand his situation. If only Zero could see how difficult this was for him... how he was practically confessing how he felt inside.

Right now, Kaname felt as if his pride was the only thing holding him up. He just prayed that it wouldn't make things worse, that Zero wouldn't take his words the wrong way. But had he said it correctly? It had sounded so rational and understanding earlier... but now it sounded like he was forcing Zero's hand. He didn't want Zero to feel forced. He didn't! Kaname hung his head and closed his burning eyes, desperately trying to hold himself together.

_God, I am such a mess!_

He had woken up earlier, a little surprised to find himself in bed and without a stitch of clothing on. He knew it was night and he rarely slept past sunset. He was still tired and yet his body was surprisingly relaxed. Kaname turned over and that was when he caught Zero's beloved scent on the pillows and everything came rushing back all at once. He had been through heaven and hell... if not exactly in that order. Kaname closed his eyes as he went through all those emotions all over again starting from the quivering anticipation of Zero's promised bite... leading to the most sensual experience of his life with Zero hugging him from the back and teasing him mercilessly... leading to him unintentionally getting Zero aroused... and ending with the shocked hunter lashing out at him and ordering him to-

Kaname sat bolt upright in bed with a gasp, his wide eyes fixed unseeingly on the chrome and polished wood of the sliding doors of his wardrobe standing against the wall. His head was echoing with the angry words Zero had flung at him. Kaname knew why they had been said but that had not stopped them from hurting him. In fact, Zero - despite his honest caring nature - had offered him a grave insult. A strange little shiver borne of both righteous anger and pain ran through Kaname. His pureblood pride had awakened and was demanding retribution. It rarely ever surfaced in Zero's presence but this time...

_How could Zero have said that to me? All I ever did was help him! Instead, he shouted at me and I... oh God._

Kaname shook his head. He swallowed, trying to breathe normally.

_He didn't mean to... he just didn't think. But don't think of that now, think of what happened next..._

But the memory of that only made Kaname blush deeply in self disgust and mortification, his heart squeezing sharply in protest. He had behaved like Zero's slave, driven to obey his master's every command and what was worse, he hadn't been successful. What was even worse than that was that Zero had gone to find him and had caught him in the act, looking a miserable pathetic sight. No doubt the hunter had stopped his useless action but it had shattered his pride completely. Kaname wrapped his bare arms around himself, shivering even harder. He forced himself to skip those immensely painful and frustrating minutes in the shower.

_Don't think of that. Zero found me, didn't he? He helped me..._

Kaname pounced on what happened next and felt the vice tightening around his heart let up a little. Zero had been _wonderful_ then. Perhaps it was remorse and nothing else but Kaname knew it had to be much more than that. Zero cared for him and it showed in how he had stopped his futile actions with firm words and a firmer touch. Kaname's eyes fluttered closed and he blushed again. This time though, it was for a sweeter yet more embarrassing reason. He had heard Zero use that parental tone on his children so many times but secretly, Kaname adored it when Zero spoke to him that way. It was strange to be spoken to as if he were no more than a child when he was actually a year older than Zero, when he had always been the one in authority, in control. It was stranger still to like that behaviour instead of taking offense but truthfully... it was the sheer _affection_ behind those words that Kaname craved. It was that which his starving heart soaked up, when it felt like he mattered. He had reveled being carried in Zero's strong arms. He couldn't remember the last time he had been carried like that.

Like he was special.

Like he was cherished.

Like he was perhaps even... loved.

Zero had cuddled him close then and Kaname was too exhausted to do anything more than sit on his lap as the remorseful hunter bit him again but so tenderly, a gentle bite that gave such warm, needed comfort to Kaname. The delicate blush on his cheeks deepened as he at last came to the memory of what had happened next - Zero's gaze, so intent. His voiced out request that Kaname hadn't thought he would ever get to hear. Zero's strong hand on his heated flesh and his breathless voice coaxing Kaname to let go and experience the most intense orgasm of his entire life. And he had, of course. It was... sublime. Dear God, what he wouldn't give to have Zero touch him there again!

Kaname took a deep breath, both hands gripping the stone railing hard. Just thinking of those explosive moments were enough to make his heart beat faster with wanting the impossible again. He hung his head lower, aware that he was shaking. His paper thin composure was already starting to crumble.

_Please know what I'm saying, Zero... please!_

The hunter's behavior earlier should not be tolerated and yet, Kaname didn't want Zero's apology. He just wanted a promise that the hunter would never act like that again particularly when it was obvious he wasn't truly disgusted with the pureblood's reaction. Kaname didn't want Zero's obeisance despite the cold and angry pureblood vibes he was giving off. He didn't want abject apologies or groveling subservience from this proud caring hunter. He just wanted...

_Just accept me as I am, Zero. That's all I'm asking right now. _

Still, the tense silence continued. With every passing second, Kaname grew increasingly terrified that Zero would think it necessary to apologise for his knee jerk reaction earlier or worse, call the whole arrangement off and leave. Kaname didn't know what he would do if that happened... it could very well be him on bended knees then.

Zero continued to stare at the pureblood's rigid back, at those shoulders that were so tense beneath that silk shirt... at the slender body that was starting to tremble. Kaname's words spoken in that cool remote voice had hit him hard. They sounded like a warning. Like an ultimatum. He had sounded cold and arrogant but... no, Kaname wasn't like this. He was never cold or arrogant with any of them. He loved them all.

And quite suddenly, the realisation hit Zero so hard he almost gasped aloud. Of course, that was it! Zero shook his head in chagrin at his own stupidity. He had humiliated Kaname earlier - the pureblood was justifiably embarrassed and angry. He was giving Zero a stern warning but truthfully, if that was all he was giving then Zero was being let off very lightly and he knew it. Zero shifted as an uneasy feeling of awe rippled through him. He hadn't really thought that Kaname would actually punish him but to be shown irrefutable proof of this was still a shock.

Still, Kaname had done the right thing in bringing this up. Zero preferred things to be upfront. Absently, his gaze travelled past the rigid shoulders and the taut back, down to the slender hands that were gripping the railing so tightly. Kaname was obviously waiting for his reply and at long last, Zero finally realised what it was his brother-in-law wanted. It was after all, what everyone wanted...

Kaname wasn't issuing him a command or a warning despite his words. He just wanted to be accepted. He had been shamed earlier and was now hiding behind the only thing he had left - his pureblood mask. He couldn't very well deny Zero his blood since he was addicted to the hunter's bite but he didn't want to alienate him further by ordering Zero to bite him again... so really, what other choice did he have left? Zero shook his head as a sheer wave of pure, soft emotion washed over him, making his throat close up. He wondered how he could have been so obtuse. Kaname was begging him in the only way he knew how.

_Kaname, you...!_

Zero shook his head slowly, somewhat embarrassed to find his eyes starting to smart, of all things. It looked like Kaname was truly incapable of punishing him. Zero knew that the pureblood treasured their friendship and the trust between them but at this very second, he hadn't realised how deep it ran. He also couldn't help the uneasy thought that perhaps Kaname felt something more than mere trust or affection.

_Could it be? That Kaname perhaps... no. No. I'm just being ridiculous. He likes my bite and he's a vampire. It arouses him, that's all. He can let go with me because we're family. Because he trusts me. That's all there is to it. _

Of course it isn't! Zero's mouth tightened. He ignored the voice in his head, took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. Resolve was growing in him, chasing away the numbing guilt, warming him up and urging him to act. He wanted to make it up to Kaname and it wasn't solely due to guilt but because he wanted to. He just... wanted to.

_Yes. I want to._

Zero exhaled loudly as he came to this decision. The sound startled Kaname into swinging around. His eyes widened as Zero started walking towards him, shoulders back and no longer hunched, silver head held up and clear amethyst eyes meeting his fearlessly. Without quite meaning to, Kaname found himself taking a step backwards, stopping when the small of his back bumped into the stone railing behind him. Unconsciously, his hands fisted by his sides. With easy grace, Zero slowly but purposefully wound his way around the small tables and chairs and stopped a bare foot and a half in front of Kaname, all the while holding the increasingly startled brown eyes.

"Kaname," Zero murmured at length with another rueful shake of his head. There was a world of tender exasperation and relief and familiarity in just that one word but it was the sheer, brimming _affection_ contained inside it that made Kaname almost break down right there and then. His breath started to hitch in his throat. He was trying very hard to hold his body ramrod stiff but it was already trembling unforgivably. It was so, so unfair - he was just putty in this hunter's hands...

"Zero-" he tried and broke off with a curse when his voice came out shaky. He hated himself for being so weak. Zero shook his head just once, the starting of a slow rueful smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. It held Kaname completely entranced and he forgot what he was going to say.

"Let me speak now," Zero said quietly, gazing into the brown depths that were now holding just a hint of fear. Kaname stared mutely at him, aware that he was only seconds away from breaking down completely. He stared helplessly into the amethyst depths that now held gentle understanding, resignation and oh, wonders of wonders, a very tender regard.

"You're really something, you know that, Kaname?" Zero said softly. "You... are... really... something."

Kaname gave a shaky sigh of relief at those words but it sounded more like a sob. The brittle cracking facade of his poise vanished and Zero saw the stiff stance relaxing, the creamy skin gaining a soft flush and the dark eyes glowing with hope. Yes... this was the Kaname Kuran he had gotten to know recently.

"Zero, I - I just wanted-" but the rest of Kaname's halting words were cut off when Zero gave a groan and hauled him close, pulling him into an embrace that was much too sudden, much too tight and infinitely, _incredibly_ wonderful. Kaname shuddered as he pressed his face into Zero's shoulder, his shaking arms coming up to encircle the hunter's back.

"You should kill me for what I said earlier, Kaname," Zero whispered into his ear, his voice huskier than he would have liked. "You really should."

The dark head shook adamantly.

"I don't want to," Kaname whispered back. "The last thing I want to do is hurt you, Zero."

Zero pressed his lips to the damp freshly washed hair, taking deep breaths of the shampoo fresh strands.

"But I had hurt you," he mumbled. "I'm sorry. You'd already told me how your body would react but Kaname, I didn't say those things because of that. I... I... I was just so ashamed of my own reaction."

Zero flushed as his confession hung between them. There - he had said it. He had tendered his apology, his olive branch. It was up to Kaname to take it... or step on it. Kaname lifted his head and gazed into the open, intense amethyst gaze, feeling the truth of Zero's words washing over him, softly soothing away the deep hurt carved onto his heart.

"I know that," he whispered. "I know why you said that."

"I'm sorry," Zero repeated. Kaname nodded.

"Zero, do you realise how much - you are the only one who can get away with that, you know?" he whispered. The unbearable sadness in his eyes called to Zero, tugging at his heart painfully and forcing him to face the immense power he unintentionally wielded over this one person whom others would give their right arm to possess. Impulsively, he dragged Kaname into his arms again and held him tightly, burying his face in the dark tresses. "I know I crossed the line. I swear, I won't ever do that again," he vowed. Again, that bone deep shudder went through Kaname.

"I'm sorry too," he whispered.

"It was meant to be the perfect session for you and I bungled it up. Again," Zero murmured, regret evident in his voice. Kaname nodded and then he shook his head. He pulled back a little, a shy smile flitting about his lips as he met Zero's eyes.

"Well, that came later," he murmured and his cheeks grew enchantingly flushed under Zero's startled gaze. In the resulting silence, Zero read the unasked question in the moist brown depths but still, he hesitated.

"Zero...?" Kaname breathed, his heart aching to know Zero's reply. He had finally gotten a taste of heaven and dear God, he would die if he never got that again. Surely Zero wouldn't be so cruel as to deny him just a few crumbs of physical pleasure? It wasn't as if that would make them lovers even if that was what Kaname yearned for but if Zero wasn't... then he was fine with whatever the hunter wanted it to be, even if it was just... comfort. Finally, Zero sighed and met Kaname's expectant, worried eyes.

"I'll still bite you, Kaname, you know that. As often as you want me to," he murmured. Kaname nodded but a wary, almost fearful look had entered his eyes. Zero's shoulders slumped and he sighed again.

"I'll also hold you at the same time. As long as I can. As long as you want me to," he reiterated his promise. A small quivering smile tilted Kaname's perfect lips at those words and Zero was momentarily distracted by that... and by the way those chocolate eyes were starting to glow with hope. Kaname was starting to quiver with sweet, sweet anticipation. Zero was literally torturing him like this, giving him hope in tantalising bits and pieces but the sincerity in those beloved eyes... oh dear God, could Zero be offering just a little bit more? Kaname prayed in his heart, as if he had never prayed before. Then wonders of wonders, Zero smiled. He leaned closer to Kaname, putting his lips right at the pureblood's ear.

"I'll even help you... after... if that's what you want," he mumbled, the innocent words made unbearably erotic by their meaning. Kaname sucked in a breath. He stared wide eyed at Zero when the latter straightened up, looking rather embarrassed.

"Zero - really?" Kaname whispered. The hunter took a step back and shoved his hands in his jeans pockets. He nodded diffidently as he looked rather pointedly at the dark surroundings outside. It wasn't an impulsive decision for him. Not really. It wasn't a guilty reaction either for hurting Kaname. It was just... just something that Zero himself wanted to do, something he only truly admitted to himself once the words were spoken. He was making this decision for Kaname and for himself. It was just... comfort. For both of them. That's all it was. Surely it wasn't enough to burn in hell for, was it?

"And I can... I can help you in turn?" Kaname whispered hopefully. Zero immediately scowled and blushed then shook his head resolutely.

"Nope. I'll take care of it myself," he said firmly. Kaname was disappointed but not really surprised. Instead, he let out a soft, shaky laugh of delight and relief that made Zero look at him suspiciously. Before he could do anything more than blink, Kaname bent forward and pressed a swift kiss onto his cheek.

_For now, my beloved hunter. For now._

- Chapter End -


	22. Chapter 22: The Kiss

**Author Notes:** Hello again! Sorry for the delay, I've been busier than I thought and uhm, somewhat distracted _-sheepishly hides Harry and Draco behind her-_ and well, you know how muses get when you don't pay enough attention to them. But I love all your reviews and comments, thank you again, and I promise to update faster from now on. Thank you for your patience and enjoy this chapter :)

- Chapter Start -

Kaname's kiss was entirely spontaneous. He half expected to be glared at but got only a resigned sounding 'huh' before Zero leaned forward to press a kiss onto his cheek in return.

"Yup, you are really, _really_ something," Zero murmured wryly once he straightened up. Then he seemed to realise what he had just done and frowned at a delighted looking Kaname.

"I - what's for lunch? I'm starving!"

Without waiting for an answer, Zero strode over to the nearest table, sat down and crossed his legs tightly. He looked as if he were forcibly holding himself back from crossing his arms as well. Kaname manfully suppressed the same giddy laugh bubbling up inside of him as he walked over. Was it actually possible to fall in love with his Zero just a little bit more? He supposed it was. Thankfully, the slightly awkward silence lasted for only half a minute before the door leading to the dining room door opened and Seiren stepped out.

"Kaname-sama, would you like lunch to be served now?" she asked. When he nodded, she bowed and went back in. Kaname stared pensively at the door, his earlier amusement at Zero's contradictory behaviour fading. The very coincidental thirty seconds between their sitting down and Seiren's appearance could only mean that she had been keeping an eye on them.

If anyone was aware of Kaname's hopelessly unrequited feelings for Zero, it would be Seiren. She was closer to him than any of the other trusted nobles of his inner circle, even Takuma. They had more or less guessed at the reason behind Zero's stabilised condition as well as his continuing youthful looks but Seiren knew it for a fact. She was Kaname's bodyguard and personal assistant; it was her job to know more. She was the one who managed his life and his appointments, the only one he trusted to arrange his transportation and flight details. She was the one he depended on to postpone appointments and reschedule meetings whenever he had to urgently leave town to go to Zero's aid or whenever he spent his rare days off at Cross Academy. It had been rather unnerving to Kaname at first, to leave her with so many clues of his biggest vulnerability, to show her that he wasn't an invincible pureblood with no weaknesses... and yet, he knew his secrets were in no safer hands.

Almost immediately, a maid stepped out with a tray and proceeded to set their table with napkins and cutlery. Zero kept his gaze trained on the darkness outside, barely hearing the incessant sound of crickets. He was battling equal amounts of exasperation and confusion. He hadn't liked that cold and distant side of Kaname earlier but he wished that the pureblood didn't look quite so pleased with himself now either. It made him feel as if they were on a date or something. Zero gave a sigh of relief when their soup arrived. It gave him something to do with his hands. Unfortunately, piping hot cream of asparagus while tasty and satisfying, wasn't quite enough to make him forget the promise he had made. Zero was willing to bet an entire month's salary that Kaname would insist on him delivering it before dawn.

Oho, surely we're not regretting already? piped up the voice in his head, sounding annoyingly triumphant. Zero ignored it in favour of the plate of grilled lamb chops that had just been set down in front of him. The aroma of the fragrant meat was enough to make him pick up his knife and fork with alacrity. It tasted as good as it looked - the meat fragrant with rosemary and garlic, topped with a honey glaze and tender enough to be cut with a fork. The mashed potato was fluffy and buttery whilst the vegetables - broccoli, carrot and baby corn - were sautéed to perfection. Midway through their meal, Zero was appeased enough to sneak glances at Kaname from time to time, smiling at how the latter polished off his food with almost child-like enthusiasm. Conversely, the pleasing sight also left him with a vague feeling of unease. Kaname Kuran was someone with the world at his feet and yet it took something of so little monetary value to make him truly happy. Zero reached for his wineglass, not sure if he wanted to wash down the mouthful of lamb in his mouth or ease the sudden tightness in his throat.

_Why do I feel like I'm the only one who can give him that?_

- o -

Seiren only materialised again after they were served coffee.

"The lamb chops were delicious, Seiren. Please convey my compliments to the chef," Kaname praised.

"Yes, Kaname-sama," she replied quietly.

"Are they any urgent emails for me?" he enquired next, ignoring Zero's raised eyebrow. Seiren shook her head.

"None so far. Dinner will be a barbeque at the back of the villa as you requested," she added. Kaname nodded and smiled at Zero's surprised look.

"Just the two of us?" the hunter asked and Kaname's smile widened.

"Yes. Shall we go take in a movie now?" he asked, deftly changing the subject. "I confess I've not been following any of the latest blockbusters, other than the one Yuko brought that time."

Zero nodded, his frown clearing up. It was a reprieve and he grabbed it.

"Fine with me. I'll give her a call after the movie," he agreed, standing up. Kaname followed suit. His keen eyes hadn't missed the brief flash of relief in those amethyst eyes but he refused to feel any sort of disappointment. His slice of heaven had been promised and he could wait for it.

- o -

The villa's indoor cinema on the top floor could seat at least two dozen people. Instead of the usual rows upon rows of seats, there were only four rows set up two by two, with generous leg room in between. The padded leathers chairs were similar to those found in the first class cabins of large airplanes; the backs and footrests adjustable to give maximum comfort. Each set of chairs had a small table in front of them to hold refreshments. Zero wasn't in the least bit surprised when Kaname sat next to him but the pureblood behaved impeccably and did not once lean towards him or touch him in any way. The spy thriller they had selected was a good choice. Barely two minutes into the show, they were caught up in the fast and furious action on screen and hardly noticed the two hours passing swiftly by. When the credits started rolling, they exchanged satisfied smiles and went back out to the corridor.

"What would you like to do now, Zero?" Kaname asked politely as he glanced at his watch. After that disastrous incident in the shower, he was adamant that he didn't want to run the risk of Zero hating this trip. It was important that he let the hunter initiate the next biting session, not himself.

"If you don't mind, I think I'll go check on my emails," Kaname added casually as they started down the stairs. "There should be a couple that need my input even if they're not urgent."

Zero nodded, looking a little more surprised this time. He had half expected Kaname to drag him somewhere private and demand that he delivered but once again, the pureblood surprised him. They had reached the first floor by now. On the other side of the stairs were glass doors leading to the indoor pool. With the underwater lights switched on, the slightly rippling green blue waters looked inviting. Zero's steps slowed down and then stopped.

"In that case, I'll go for a swim. Work up an appetite for the barbeque," he decided aloud. Kaname suppressed the instant regret that he wouldn't be able to join Zero for a swim. He forced a nod and a quick smile.

"Sounds good. You'll find everything you need in the changing rooms so you don't have to go up to your room. We'll meet for a cup of tea an hour from now?"

Zero smiled and nodded before pushing open the doors. Kaname forced himself to go back upstairs to his study before he could change his mind. They still had plenty of time. He could wait.

The large swimming pool looked even more inviting up close. Zero shed his sneakers and padded across the tiles to the changing rooms. He was aware that he had been given another reprieve. He was also aware that he was now feeling both relieved _and_ annoyed. Kaname had been so clingy and insistent earlier but now, it was almost as if their conversation earlier had never taken place at all. It was... confusing to say the least.

Oho, getting edgy now, are we? came that familiar snicker inside his head. Zero shook his head adamantly. He went into the men's changing room and undressed, hanging up his T-shirt, slacks and underwear on a convenient row of hooks. Nearby were open shelves holding brand new male and female swimwear still in their plastic wraps, along with toweling robes, towels and even goggles. Zero pulled on a pair of black swimming trunks, sternly telling the voice that he was _not_ edgy. He should be relieved, knowing what was likely to happen after the next biting session.

Heck, he _was_ relieved. Yes. He was.

- o -

Fifty minutes later, Zero was showered and back in his own clothes, his body pleasantly tired after trawling through the warm water, using every stroke he knew and flipping onto his back in between to float lazily on the surface. The swim hadn't made him forget his promise but at least he now realised that Kaname was holding himself back. Perhaps after the barbeque then? Zero scowled as his body stirred with interest. Getting to see the breathless and passionate side of Kaname wasn't a privilege extended to everyone and damnit, he was looking forward to seeing that side of him again. Zero caught himself grinning foolishly at the mirror and shook his head in disgust. He exited the pool area and sat down on a conveniently placed bench beside the stairs, taking out his hand phone. The villa had excellent reception and it was time he called Yuko.

Kaname had made quick work of the first three emails in his mailbox. He stared at the fourth one before sighing and standing up. Shaking his head at himself, he went down to the first floor. He muted his aura and stayed by the glass doors for a few minutes, observing the lithe figure in the pool. Kaname finally dragged himself away and wondered if he could get through dinner before succumbing to his wish of pulling Zero upstairs and begging to be bitten again. Hopefully, he could. But probably not.

_I'm hopeless._

Kaname sighed and went back upstairs to his study where he immersed himself in a couple of proposals and agreements. When it was finally time, he went downstairs once more and was just in time to hear Zero ending his telephone conversation.

"You'll love the garden. All right, I'll ask but I'm sure Kaname-oji-san wouldn't mind having his favourite niece stay here as long as she wants."

There was a pause and then Zero chuckled, the low familiar sound sending a shiver over Kaname.

"Well, his only niece then. I'll be back day after tomorrow. Bye now."

Zero ended the call and looked up, his smile once again catching Kaname off guard.

"Guess what?" he asked, standing up. Kaname smiled back.

"Yuko and Tomi are always welcome here and you already know that," he replied. They went downstairs to the beautiful cream and russet coloured living room where tea was already waiting for them - Earl Grey and fruit juice with a selection of freshly baked pastries. Kaname switched on the television, keeping the volume low to provide a bit of background noise. Zero watched the screen idly as Kaname poured their tea.

"You really should come here more often," he remarked, accepting his cup with a nod of thanks. "Good weather for one thing and it's more relaxing than the city."

He also wanted to say that Kaname could also benefit from the delicious food served here but he didn't. He had probably nagged the pureblood enough over the years. Kaname continued stirring his tea but he didn't reply at once. He only looked up a few moments later.

"I will... if you'll join me," he replied. It wasn't the words that surprised Zero as much as the reluctance in Kaname's voice. Zero sat up straighter, his own eyebrows meeting together in disapproval.

"I didn't say that to get an invitation, Kaname," he chided. "Just that you work too -"

Kaname shook his head impatiently and Zero fell silent, his eyes on the graceful fingers holding the silver teaspoon. Kaname laid it carefully down on the bone china saucer. By the time he looked back up, Zero had already guessed what Kaname was going to say and he was right.

"Zero, I meant that. I want to come back here but with you," he said quietly. Zero tensed, aware that they were starting to get into dangerous waters again. He should just change the subject but he didn't.

"Then why did you sound so reluctant?"

Kaname gave a rather embarrassed shrug but his gaze was steady.

"Because I had already promised myself earlier not to pressure you," he admitted frankly. He forced himself to hold Zero's gaze despite the painful memory of what had happened earlier hovering between them. In the end, Kaname just shrugged again.

"I'm sure you know that I would welcome your company. Anytime. Anywhere. And..." Kaname took a deep, calming breath and let it out slowly. "And not just because it would afford us more privacy for our arrangement."

_But because I want to spend every single minute with you._

It was hard to keep from saying those words aloud but Kaname managed. Zero sighed, closing his eyes.

"Somehow, I just knew you'd say that," he mumbled, causing Kaname's lips to twitch. It was almost as if Zero had heard his silent thoughts. He waited until the hunter had opened his eyes again before leaning forward.

"And your answer is?" he whispered. Zero rolled his eyes.

"Yes, of course. What did you think it would be?" he countered but ended up smiling ruefully when Kaname did. The pureblood reached for one of the cream filled éclairs and Zero followed suit, selecting a chocolate one. They washed down the pastries with the tea, content to keep their comments on the food. After a while Zero yawned and rubbed his eyes.

"I think I might have a short nap after all," he mumbled. It seemed the height of laziness to him to do nothing but eat and sleep but hey, he was on holiday, right? He yawned again and stretched, unaware of the gaze tracking the way his tee shirt pulled taut across his chest. When Zero opened his eyes, he caught Kaname looking at him. This time, the dark eyes were unguarded and filled with unmistakable longing. One blink and it was gone but Zero was no longer sleepy nor interested in taking a nap. Not immediately anyway.

"Kaname?" he spoke quietly. The dark eyes slowly lifted to his and stayed there. Zero didn't say anything else but he didn't need to - the silent question in his eyes was enough to make Kaname's heart race.

_Zero? Are you... offering?_

Each and every one of his well intentioned resolutions disappeared in the wake of a sudden and unstoppable wave pure, utter... _want_. There was no way Kaname was going to say no now. He couldn't.

"Yes. If you could, I - yes," he murmured, even more vexed with himself for his startling lack of eloquence. He bit his lip but Zero only smiled.

"Let's go then," he offered. "I might have my nap after that."

Kaname stood up quickly, his eyes sparkling.

"Together?" he asked just as Zero knew he would. He chuckled and nudged Kaname in the shoulder, the gesture causing the slight tension between them to dissipate.

"Every time I give you an inch..." he teased. Kaname smiled back, nudging him gently back as they walked towards the door.

"...I take whatever I can," he completed easily. Despite his light tone, Zero knew he was only half joking.

The moment they reached the second floor landing, Kaname reached for Zero's hand. The latter rolled his eyes but didn't pull away. They were going to do something a whole lot more intimate than just holding hands so why quibble?

They went down the corridor to Kaname's room. The soft lighting had been switched on and there were fresh sheets on the bed but neither one of them noticed. Kaname gave Zero's hand a tug, pulling him further into the room until they stood at the foot of the large bed. With their gazes locked, Kaname slipped off his shoes and Zero did the same with his sneakers. Kaname started on the buttons of his shirt but under that intent amethyst gaze, his normally skilled fingers fumbled and he cursed inwardly.

_Perhaps a sweater would have been easier. No buttons._

Zero found himself once again entranced. The soft lighting made Kaname's pale skin glow and the sight of those elegant fingers stumbling over such a simple task melted him and boosted his own confidence at the same time. Kaname looked up when Zero took a step closer, capturing his hands in his warmer ones. Automatically, the pureblood's frantic movements stilled. He froze, barely breathing. Zero inhaled the delicious scent that only Kaname Kuran had, deep into his lungs and allowed those dark eyes to beguile and ensnare him, letting it chase away the last vestiges of logic and reason. What they were about to do once again felt impossibly right and the hunter was more relieved than he wanted to admit.

"Zero?" Kaname whispered. "This time... don't stop."

"I won't," Zero promised. He half expected that voice in his head to say something but there was only the faint echo of a very pleased laugh and then complete silence. Zero gave Kaname's hands a final squeeze and released them. He dealt with the remaining buttons swiftly but after that, his movements slowed down. Zero took his time parting the front panels of the silk shirt, silently worshipping the creamy perfection of Kaname's pale flat stomach before moving up. He contemplated the swift rise and fall of the ribs under that pale skin that indicated how erratic their owner's breathing was. Slowly, he slid his gaze further up and paused to stare at enticing apricot hued nipples, already hardened to stiff buds. Kaname was helpless to do anything but withstand that burning gaze, his traitorous lungs and body happily giving away his reactions with no thought whatsoever to his pride.

By now, Zero's gaze had reached the delicate collarbones with the intriguing hollows that led up to the graceful pale neck. Inside this enticing, trembling package with the dark tumbling waves of hair, wide trusting eyes and creamy flushed skin was the blood that no words could adequately describe. The knowledge that he was going to partake of it from the base of that neck itself caused Zero's fangs to lengthen almost painfully fast. By the time he brought his gaze up to Kaname's face, his eyes were a blazing, hungry crimson. Kaname's lips parted on a soundless gasp, blood rushing up into his cheeks and down to pool between his legs.

"I _want_ to bite you, Kaname. I _want_ to touch you," Zero whispered throatily, his gaze again dropping to the madly jumping pulse just millimetres under that tender sweet smelling skin. The rough timbre of his voice made Kaname's throat dry. He moistened his lips and saw that crimson gaze dart up again, latching onto that pink tongue with disturbing intensity. Time slowed down obligingly as Zero stared his fill, his eyes burning brighter still. Kaname's heart felt like it was going to pound right out of his chest. Zero would perhaps never - but with the way he was staring now, Kaname couldn't help thinking - wishing - praying that perhaps... Then the crimson eyes faltered and shifted down to his neck, leaving Kaname floundering with an acute sense of loss. He inhaled sharply, fingers clenching into fists by his sides.

_It's OK. One step at a time._

"Bite me," he whispered at last. For now, he would be satisfied with what he had been promised. Zero nodded and slid his hands under the silk shirt, fingers spreading against the smooth warm shoulders. Slowly, he drew Kaname nearer and nearer until their bodies were pressed flush together, both choosing to ignore the semi hard flesh pressing against them. Zero nestled his face in the fragrant crook of Kaname's neck, breathing deeply. He heard the answering sigh of pleasure and read willing permission in that single, breathy sound.

"Zero," Kaname moaned. "I - bite me!"

"When I'm ready," Zero murmured huskily. He pressed his lips to the soft skin, his senses focusing on the frantically beating pulse that echoed Kaname's rapid heartbeat. He could hear the delicious rush of blood below the skin, brought on by the pounding of a frantically beating heart that seemed just a tad faster than his. He knew how desperately Kaname wanted his bite. Zero's fangs were starting to ache but he ignored them. Perhaps he was being just a little bit cruel now but Kaname had annoyed him earlier, pulling that gracious host role and pretending he didn't need to be bitten. Well, if he didn't then there was no need to hurry.

Was there?

Zero could almost hear the voice in his head rolling its eyes. If voices had eyes... Zero hid a grin at his nonsensical thought. He continued pressing light kisses along Kaname's neck and jaw, licking and tasting. His fangs were now starting to throb in earnest but he tuned it out as much as he could, concentrating on the most adorable sounds coming from the shivering creature in his arms. Zero let his tongue dart out to taste the soft skin just under that perfectly shaped ear, teasingly drawing small wet circles on the surface. Kaname moaned predictably, body jerking and hands clutching at Zero's arms.

"Ze-Zero, please!" he pleaded, throwing caution and pride to the four winds. He _adored_ what that tongue was doing but right now he _needed_ those fangs. Needed them like nothing could ever describe.

"In a moment," was the even more infuriating answer. Kaname groaned in frustration, grinding his hips against Zero's in retaliation, leaving them in no doubt of the other's physical state; both were completely aroused now. Zero cursed inwardly - he hadn't even bitten Kaname yet! A very small part of him balked at the sensation, wanting him to run or at least put some space between their bodies but he stayed still. He had made a promise and he was going to keep it.

_No more knee jerk reaction this time. No more running away. No more hurting Kaname._

Zero straightened up, trying to ignore Kaname's hardness pulsing against his lower abdomen. It was extremely distracting.

"I can feel you," he whispered. Kaname looked up, surprised. Their gazes met and held. Zero's eyes were filled with hunger and a hint of uncertainty but Kaname's showed only a shy defiance that was deliciously appealing.

"I know," he whispered back. "I can feel you too."

Despite himself, Zero's lips curved in a rueful smile.

"Yeah, can't miss that," he murmured. Kaname's eyes widened in delight and he smiled back. That was it - Zero's awkwardness vanished, leaving in its place a desire to please Kaname by indulging in something they would both enjoy. Zero's smile turned predatory, his fangs flashing in the soft light and alerting Kaname of his intent. The pureblood responded immediately, head tipping to the left and back. The light scrape of familiar sharp points over his moist skin left him breathless with want. He cried out a moment later as those fangs finally struck, breaking past skin and driving deep inside him, the way he always wanted to be claimed by his beloved hunter.

Neither of them had any idea how much Zero drank this time only that he had spun out the sensual delight for both of them to the very best of his ability. Holding on tightly to his shaky control, he sucked and licked carefully, timing his sips to pounding heartbeats and breathless moans until Kaname was reduced to a quivering ecstatic wreck in his arms. By the time Zero finally withdrew his fangs, Kaname was lightheaded, panting and clinging to him with strands of his dark hair sticking to his forehead and neck. They were both achingly hard by now, their skin moist with the glow of desire. Carefully, Zero licked Kaname's neck clean. His body was now thrumming with the familiar energy and wellbeing Kaname's blood always brought him and the pleasurable way he had taken it in only left him wanting more. All he could think of now was undoing Kaname completely and making up for every single disappointment he had given him. Kaname raised his head, his eyes huge and looking a little dazed.

"Touch me," he whispered imploringly. Pride had no place in this moment; Kaname would beg if he need to. Fortunately, that wasn't necessary. Zero gave a slight nod, reaching for Kaname's belt. The faint clink of metal sounded overly loud in their ears. Kaname closed his eyes when he felt his belt sliding out of the buckle. His trouser button was next and then he bit his lip as Zero drew his zipper down, the soft rasp sounding unbelievably erotic to his sensitive hearing. When he felt the dark material sliding down past his hips and pooling around his ankles, Kaname's eyes fluttered open.

Zero stared at him openly, caught by the long bulge under the cream coloured underwear, the small damp circle marking its crown. He paused to inhale Kaname's aroused scent, letting it go straight to his head and down to his groin. Slowly, he hooked his thumbs in the waistband and eased the underwear down, feasting his eyes boldly on the proud length of flesh that sprang free. Kaname was shaking with anticipation as he stepped out of his clothes as gracefully as he could. Other than the shirt hanging off his shoulders, he wore nothing else. Zero reached for his shirt, sliding it off those slender shoulders and letting it fall to the carpet. Kaname was now completely bared to that burning, worshipping gaze. He was shy, flushed and trembling - everything a pureblood prince shouldn't be. But he was only like that with Zero and ultimately, that was the only thing that mattered.

Zero growled his approval softly, his eyes raking the naked pureblood in front of him. The low sound was enough to make Kaname's nipples tighten almost to the point of pain, his erection twitching. Zero placed his hands back on Kaname's shoulders and slid them slowly down, thumbs tracing the delicate collar bones, the light callouses on his skin causing delicious shivers to ripple through Kaname. He gasped out a breath and it was pure invitation, spoken in a language that needed no words. Zero gave in almost immediately, hands sliding a little lower so that his thumbs could tease the puckered nipples. Kaname arched his back with a soft little cry that went straight to Zero's groin. He buried his face in Kaname's neck once again, lips pressing against the newly healed skin, trailing his tongue over the sensitive skin and drawing more shivers from Kaname as his thumbs worked soft, incoherent cries from his throat.

"Ze-Zero..." Kaname moaned, twisting a little in his arms.

"Yes," Zero whispered. Slowly, he turned Kaname around so his back was towards him. Kaname placed his legs apart and prayed they would hold him up, shivering as the bold hands curled around his waist and slid down past his flat stomach. One hand closed around the hard twitching flesh between his legs at long last.

Zero started stroking and Kaname's mouth fell open, head lolling back against a muscular shoulder. As before, he curled trembling fingers at either side of Zero's hips, eyes sliding shut in bliss. He knew he wasn't going to last long but it felt too good to even think of asking Zero to slow down. Zero kept his grip firm. He rested his chin on Kaname's shoulder and stared raptly at the rosy head and the wonderfully rigid length in his hand. Kaname was leaking and Zero let the clear liquid coat his palm. He kept his strokes firm and determined at first but Kaname's soft helpless cries were just too beautiful to rush. Zero's movements slowed down as he drank in Kaname's cries, feeling himself grow harder and harder until he realised he wasn't going to last long either.

"Zero, f-faster..." Kaname was almost whimpering by now, his hips thrusting forward into the tight fist and then back, grinding against Zero before thrusting forward again. Zero cursed again. He wanted to tease Kaname a little more to make good his promise but the imminent prospect of releasing in his slacks changed his mind. He speeded up instead and Kaname moaned in relief, legs buckling. Zero kept him upright with his left arm tightly around his waist, his hot panting breath brushing Kaname's right ear. The pureblood was starting to thrash around and Zero's eyes glowed with triumph. He rubbed the pad of his thumb firmly against the slick head and almost stumbled back when Kaname pressed hard against him with a deliciously needy cry. Zero braced his back, wanting to hear that sound again. He stopped pumping Kaname completely and moved only his thumb, rotating it in tight firm circles that turned Kaname's knees to water, his head arching back helplessly.

"Unhh..." Kaname shuddered, toes curling and legs so boneless that Zero's arm was the only thing keeping him upright. He pressed back desperately against Zero, writhing helplessly.

"P-please..." he gasped, shuddering as Zero's wicked thumb only increased its pressure. It was the sweetest kind of torment but it wasn't going to give Kaname the release he craved. By the time Zero finally took mercy on him, Kaname was almost sobbing in frustration. He felt his eyes tearing up in pure relief when he was finally gripped tightly again. Three almost ruthlessly hard strokes was all it took - Kaname arched his back and screamed as his body convulsed in yet another stunning orgasm. He dug his fingers into Zero's hips, head pushed back against the hunter's shoulder and toes tightly curled into the carpet as his body jerked and shuddered, shooting out jet after jet of creamy liquid. The sight and sounds of Kaname's ecstatic release almost undid Zero. He gritted his teeth and held out, prolonging Kaname's bliss as much as he could, enjoying the cries he wrung from the pureblood that turned softer and softer as his orgasm slowly ebbed. Zero walked them backwards until the backs of his knees found the bed. He sat down and let himself fall backwards, pulling Kaname with him and turning once again onto his side. As much as he wanted to continue holding the shivering body in his arms, he couldn't.

With a mumbled curse and an apology, Zero disentangled himself and rushed into the bathroom. He unzipped his slacks and shoved them down to his knees. Gripping himself in one hand, he pumped himself hard with the same speed he had denied Kaname. It didn't take long before he was tumbling headlong into sweet release with a hoarse cry, his own essence spurting out of him, completely unaware of Kaname's quiet presence.

- o -

A small sound made Zero straighten up, his hands automatically pulling up his pants. He swung around, chest still heaving and legs feeling decidedly shaky. Kaname stood in the doorway, looking utterly delicious with his body flushed and damp with perspiration, his long hair dishevelled. Zero stared wordlessly at him, aware that his just spent body was actually starting to stir at the sight.

Kaname looked so... _beddable_. Yes, that was the exact word that described the pureblood now. Under the burning amethyst gaze, Kaname felt his body tighten with desire once more. Zero found his gaze dropping to the pureblood's groin, where something was swiftly rising to life. A quick glance back up at Kaname's face showed the most enchanting flush.

"I wanted to see," Kaname murmured softly. He wasn't surprised when Zero shook his head decisively and stepped over to the vanity to wash his hands. Kaname sighed and waited. His patience was rewarded when Zero finally looked up into the mirror, meeting his gaze without turning around.

"I'm confused, Kaname. What does this - arrangement - make us?" he asked softly. "What does it mean?"

Zero looked as lost as he sounded. He had thought it was pure and simple comfort but it was actually a whole lot more complicated than that. How could he do something so intimate and personal to someone else and still hope to remain detached from it all? He just... couldn't. He wasn't that sort of person.

Kaname stayed silent, his eyes taking in Zero's troubled expression. He knew the hunter would come to this realisation soon enough after having seen his single minded devotion to Yuuki over the years. Zero may have enjoyed biting and teasing him and even pleasuring him but he hadn't expected to be so affected by it. Kaname's smile was bittersweet. His heart was breaking again but he loved Zero all the more for the person he was.

"It means whatever you want it to mean," Kaname replied steadily. He wanted for them to be lovers already but the most important thing now was to not frighten Zero. If it meant that he had to make this sound casual when it meant the world to him, when it was something he had longed for years... then he would. Zero's solemn eyes held Kaname's for a long moment and then he exhaled and dropped his head forward.

"Geez, I'm in over my head," he muttered to himself. Kaname stepped forward, laying a gentle hand on Zero's arm.

"Don't think anymore," he said softly. "It doesn't have to mean anything more than it does right now."

_I can be satisfied with this. I can._

Zero turned around suddenly.

"But do you want it to?" he asked abruptly. Kaname gazed into the startled amethyst depths and realised that Zero hadn't meant to ask him that. The trouble was, Kaname had absolutely no idea how to answer it. The answer was obviously a thunderous, resounding, no holds barred _YES_... but the almost frightened look in Zero's eyes stopped him. The hunter was still so skittish... Kaname knew that he were to ever win Zero's heart, he would have to go very slowly. It could take months... or even years perhaps... but he had already waited this long, hadn't he?

The silence spun out between them and finally, Kaname licked his dry lips. He saw how Zero's gaze dropped, those eyes caught by the movement of his tongue and he looked away, his heart pounding rapidly in his chest. He took a deep breath to say it but Zero spoke first.

"No - don't answer that," he warned.

"Why not?" Kaname asked. Zero gave an embarrassed shrug, his gaze not quite meeting the pureblood's.

"I don't think I want to hear the answer," he mumbled.

_I don't think I can handle that right now._

Hear it, insisted the voice, sounding as if it were hopping up and down. You - you coward! Zero scowled. So he was a coward, so what? He had had enough shocks for now. One more and he might just lose it completely. Zero shook his head determinedly.

"Never mind. Let's get some rest," he suggested. Kaname bit his lip but he nodded all the same.

"Stay with me?" he asked. Zero knew he was being expertly cajoled again but he didn't mind.

"All right," he agreed, wishing that Kaname would at least put on a robe. Unfortunately, the pureblood's modesty seemed to have disappeared. He simply turned around and sauntered back into the bedroom, inviting Zero to stare his fill.

- o -

Kaname awoke a couple of hours later, thrilled beyond words to find himself not alone for once. Zero was spooning him from behind and although Kaname felt a little hot and sticky, he reveled in the delicious closeness and warmth, something he had always wanted to experience for himself. The soft breathing at his ear told him that Zero was soundly asleep. With a happy smile, Kaname snuggled even closer, resting his hand lightly on the strong arm around his waist. He closed his eyes again and let himself slide into sleep once more, feeling safe and cared for.

The next time he awoke, it was to the feel of someone's fingers threading slowly through his hair. Kaname sighed in contentment, stretching like a cat. Then he stopped halfway and his eyes shot open, encountering amused amethyst ones. Zero was lying sideways next to him, his head propped up on one hand.

"If you're this tired after just one go, you need to sleep more," he remarked lightly, still managing to sound like a parent despite the activity he was referring to. Kaname pouted, secretly thrilled that Zero was teasing him about their earlier intimacy. Once again, the hunter's eyes darted to his lips, effectively stopping Kaname from breathing for a long moment before he looked away.

"You too," Kaname managed after gulping in air. Zero sighed and shrugged.

"Guess you're right, I was tired too," he admitted softly. Kaname smiled and Zero returned the smile, half regretting that he had woken the pureblood up. He looked beautiful asleep.

"Well, time to get up," he said. "I'm going to shower first and the answer is no, you can't join me!"

Zero sprang out of bed. He moved fast but the pillow Kaname threw still managed to hit him in the back of the head before he reached the bathroom. Zero chuckled but didn't look back as he closed the door behind him. He didn't bother to lock the door. Somehow, he knew Kaname would respect his privacy.

- o -

Zero didn't think it was possible to feel hungry after a hearty lunch and tea but he changed his mind as soon as he and Kaname walked around the villa, the delicious smell of grilled food already in the air. Everything was baked or grilled to perfection. Zero made a mental note to ask the chef for the secret of his marinade - he knew his own recipe for grilled chicken wings had lost out. There was also steak and more lamb chops, sausages, chicken kebabs, corn on the cob and other vegetables that lent themselves well to grilling, all washed down with the same delicious red wine they had had during lunch.

Kaname was surprised to find himself hungry as well. No doubt, Zero's teasing bite and the second most stunning orgasm he had ever experienced had had a hand in it. He particularly enjoyed the grilled eggplant - thin slices drizzled with butter, salt and pepper before wrapped in foil and grilled. Zero made another mental note to himself to prepare that dish the next time Kaname came to Cross Academy.

Akira had driven up to the villa to deliver some documents to Seiren and at Kaname's insistence, joined them for dinner. They had barely started when an eager meow sounded, turning it into a party of four. Zero chuckled as the white cat sashayed over, her round eyes fixed on him. She jumped up onto the bench and allowed Akira to pet her head briefly before making herself comfortable in Zero's lap once more, looking pleased that Seiren was not around. When Kaname stroked her head, she meowed obligingly but didn't seem inclined to move from where she was.

"Does she have a name?" Zero asked, dipping his third chicken wing into sweet chili sauce and wondering if he should feed her. Her eyes were shut and she didn't seem interested so he guessed the staff had already given her her dinner.

"Kitty," Kaname replied promptly. Zero's eyebrows shot up and Akira grinned. He explained that she was the oldest in a litter of five kittens his own cat had given birth to a year ago. His daughter had christened her Hello Kitty before letting Akira bring her to this villa. Kaname smiled as Zero grinned down at the purring feline on his lap.

"Missing your ribbon, I see," was all he said.

- o -

An hour and a half later, the three of them declared themselves full to bursting. Zero groaned as one of the smiling staff proceeded to arrange more foil wrapped packages on the grill. It smelled heavenly. Despite their resolve, they still picked up clean spoons as soon as the packages were placed on their table and unwrapped - sliced bananas sprinkled with raisins, butter, brown sugar and a dash of rum, all set ablaze after being heated. Between the three of them, they managed to polish off two portions before standing up, groaning as their stomachs protested.

Akira made his excuses and disappeared off into the kitchens with a most reluctant Kitty while Kaname thanked the staff. He and Zero caught up their wine glasses and went back into the villa, allowing the staff to enjoy their own dinner before clearing up. In no time at all, Kaname and Zero were stepping out onto the same balcony as before.

Zero leaned against the stone balustrade with a sigh, cradling his wine glass. He half expected Kaname to join him and was almost hoping he would but the pureblood chose to sit down at the nearest table instead, content to sip his wine and admire the slight breeze playing with Zero's soft silver hair. There was a faint lightening of the sky in the distance, just above the tops of the trees. It would be dawn soon. Zero kept his gaze there, wondering where had the guilt that had tormented him so much earlier disappeared to. Was it simply because he had finally accepted the fact that he wanted to pleasure Kaname or was it just temporarily absent due to the wine and Kaname's obvious contentment? Had he made too much of a fuss over something that perhaps wasn't such a big deal after all?

Zero sighed, nowhere closer to finding the answer than before. Kaname had said that he was fine with whatever their arrangement was but his eyes had said something else and Zero didn't want to think about that something. Right now, he didn't want to think at all. He just wanted... to act. To do _something_. Perhaps not bite Kaname again so soon... but something that would give him the same sort of warmth, the same hint of intimacy. Zero ignored the fact that he wasn't making much sense. He swung around and pinned his gaze on the pureblood sitting at the table.

Kaname was about to sip at his wine but he paused. Zero's face was in shadow but he could feel the intensity of that amethyst gaze on him. Automatically, the tip of his tongue darted out to moisten suddenly dry lips. Zero made a sound that was half growl, half groan and Kaname froze on the spot. He could only watch as the hunter straightened up and walked towards him.

Zero rounded the table and stopped right next to Kaname. He placed his glass down on the table behind him with an audible thud. Next, he plucked the wineglass from Kaname's nerveless fingers and placed it next to his. It was impossible of course... but suddenly, Kaname just knew what was going to happen. His breath hitched in his throat and he couldn't seem to get enough air into his lungs. It was impossible... but his body didn't care, tightening in expectation of something his brain kept on insisting would never happen.

Kaname parted his lips, tongue coming out again to moisten them. It was a silent invitation he had unconsciously issued numerous times and this time, Zero did not refuse. He half leaned, half sat on the edge of the table right in front of Kaname, bringing them a little closer to eye level. Kaname's head went up obligingly, lips still temptingly parted, pale neck exposed.

"Hold still," Zero whispered as he bent forward. Kaname could only swallow at that command, the sheer suspense forcing his breaths to come out in shallow quick pants, strung with hope of the sweetest kind. After what seemed like an excruciatingly long time, Zero bent forward. Kaname froze, still only half believing what was about to happen. A knee weakening surge of joy - anticipated and dreamt of for more than three decades - finally came up to sweep over him as Zero's warm lips finally, finally made contact with his. It was a soft, chaste touching of two mouths but to someone who had never been kissed before but who had imagined all too often of what it must feel like... Kaname had no words to describe his feelings as he received his very first kiss and gave his own to the person it had been meant for at long, long last.

Zero drew away after a moment, leaving Kaname to open his eyes and start breathing again. He didn't say anything but the surprised wide of his eyes and the delicate flush in his cheeks showed he wasn't in the least bit annoyed.

"I..." Zero broke off and shrugged helplessly. The only thing he was feeling now was the overwhelming urge to kiss Kaname again, particularly with the way he looked now, caught in a perfect display of surprised delight. Zero gave in and leaned forward once more. This time, his lips lingered a little longer on that warm mouth, tasting wine and something far sweeter. He heard a tiny sound in Kaname's throat and quickly drew back, concerned when he saw the telltale shimmer in those warm chocolate eyes.

"Kaname," Zero started worriedly but the pureblood shook his head, blinking rapidly and swallowing.

"If you're going to apologise, Zero - don't. Just... more," he said huskily. Zero's eyebrows rose. Then he smiled, torn between wonder and amusement. Kaname wanted to be kissed again? Really, really kissed?

"More," Kaname repeated, his body aching for that sweet, sweet contact. He wanted his lips to know the magic of the hunter's lips, the way his neck already knew. "Kiss me. Again."

Zero nodded. He brought his hands up to frame that beautiful face. There was nothing and no one to stop them. There was just this shy trust and wholehearted longing shining in Kaname's eyes that made refusal an impossible task. Zero tilted his head and touched his lips to Kaname's again. This time, it was a real kiss, one long, tender and as sweet as the one he first gave to Yuuki after that fateful school dance, a lifetime ago. It was... _perfection._

Kaname leaned forward, trembling fingertips grazing Zero's cheek as he tasted his beloved hunter's lips, the hint of the red wine melding their flavours together in the sweetest way. Kaname's chest filled with a warmth that he didn't know how to contain. It was so perfect he never wanted it to end. But it did and he could only stare up in wordless gratitude at Zero, too moved to think of hiding the moisture shimmering in his eyes.

"Again."

Zero grinned, one eyebrow quirking up as if to say 'Really?' But he complied. This kiss retained all the sweetness of the one before but their mouths were open and their tongues met for the first time. Zero growled, taking the lead. He stroked Kaname's tongue with his own and heard the strangled sound of delight. Then Kaname was pressing closer to him, both hands coming up to clutch at Zero's shoulders, lips parting even more to invite Zero in. The hunter obliged at once, slipping his tongue in and then the kiss turned deep and hungry, lasting for almost a whole minute before they broke apart, gasping for air.

Kaname stood up shakily and Zero responded without being asked, wrapping his arms tightly around the pureblood. Kaname buried his face in Zero's shoulder, his heart overflowing with so much happiness, he wasn't sure if he could hold it all back.

"I know you won't believe me," he whispered dazedly. "But that... that was..."

Zero's eyes blinked open. He didn't want to talk but a sliver of curiosity made him loosen his hold.

"That was...?" he prompted. Kaname took a step back and lifted his head, cheeks enchantingly flushed.

"My first," he confessed. Zero inhaled sharply at that, the hazy daze he was in lifting a little.

"Your first? Your first kiss?" he asked disbelievingly. Kaname nodded and Zero's mouth fell open. It didn't occur to him that Kaname might be joking - why would he joke about such a thing?

"But - you're almost fifty!" Zero blurted out and immediately winced at how that had sounded. It was almost a slap to the face. Kaname ducked his head, berating himself for letting that slip. Damn, he hadn't meant to. He just thought... no, he just wasn't thinking at all.

"I... does that make me a freak?" he whispered painfully. Zero's heart gave a sudden, sharp pang at how ashamed the pureblood looked. He had done it again, hadn't he?

"No! No, of course it doesn't... but Kaname, you're a pureblood! You - everyone would - I mean..."

Zero cursed. He was making things worse, not better. Kaname shook his head numbly. He released Zero's arms and stepped towards the balcony. Zero swung around to watch him. Kaname's face was shuttered, his shoulders tense. He pushed both hands into his pockets, eyes squeezed shut. Another embarrassing secret had been blurted out and there was no calling it back.

"And everyone wants a piece of me. Do you think I don't know that?"

This time, Kaname's voice went far, far beyond mere loneliness or sadness or even bitterness. It was a numb sort of resignation cemented into reality by decades of being alone, unable to reach for the love he wanted. It was a weary acceptance of a fact that could never, ever be changed. Everyone worshipped him and wanted him.

_Everyone... but the one I long for._

- Chapter End -


	23. Chapter 23: The Confession

**Author Notes:** Hello and thank you once again for your wonderful, wonderful reviews and feedback! They keep me writing and writing :D This chapter has one of the pivotal scenes I'd written more than a year ago, I'm pleased to let you all read it at last. I usually post on Fridays but have completed this a little earlier. Enjoy...!

**Appreciation:** To **Schattengestalt** in the hopes that it will not disappoint and to also wish her a wonderful holiday :D

- Chapter Start -

Zero had no idea how to reply Kaname. He just stood there and stared at the forlorn figure standing by the balustrade, face turned away and shoulders tense as if expecting a physical blow. Zero exhaled as slowly as he could, shaking his head as he did so. He had just given Kaname Kuran, the most sought after pureblood male in the world, his first kiss. Unbelievable. Laughable even, considering what else he had been giving the pureblood over the past few decades. Countless bites and recently, some erotic teasing and very recently, two 'comfort sessions'.

No, really - it _was_ unbelievable. But still nothing short of the truth. Zero would have bet his Bloody Rose on it. It didn't stop him from wanting to freak out, though. He couldn't believe it! How the hell was it even possible for someone - _anyone_, let alone a devastatingly gorgeous pureblood with the world at his feet – to reach almost half a century old without being kissed on the lips before?

Zero dragged unsteady fingers through his hair, his eyes darting all around him as if the answer could be found somewhere on the verandah if he only looked hard enough. Look at Cross, for heaven's sake! His late adopted father had been a blithering, babbling idiot, prancing about the school with a flowered apron on half the time and spouting nonsense the other half but he still had managed to catch the eye – no pun intended – of Touga Yagari, surely the most tough talking, cynical, merciless vampire hunter of his days and the least likely person on earth to fall for a flowered apron and a ditzy persona. Granted, Cross' housewifely act had mostly been for show and the man himself was someone Zero had been and was still proud to call 'Father' but still...!

Zero could feel hysteria bubbling up in his throat and fought it down. He tried to remain calm. He had to. He took a deep breath and held it before letting it out slowly. All right, so what if that was Kaname's first kiss? Or kisses? Big deal, right? But that was just it - it _was_ a very big deal. To him and to Kaname, who must... who must be feeling like shit now. Zero's throat was suddenly too tight and so was his chest. They shouldn't have served that damned wine. He shouldn't have drunk so much of it. Then he wouldn't have kissed Kaname and found that he loved it and kept on kissing him until Kaname blurted out his secret and they wouldn't be having this horribly awkward conversation right now. Not that anyone was talking. The feeling of doing what had seemed like the most natural thing in the world had fled off into the night, along with the euphoric well being brought on by good food and wine and company.

Zero was starting to shake. Delayed shock he told himself. Then what the _hell_ do you think Kaname's feeling now? whispered the voice menacingly after having been silent for so long – probably just woken up from a swoon induced by those kisses. Zero sighed again. He shouldn't blame it on the wine alone. The truth was, he had wanted to kiss Kaname for some time now. Each damned time he did that _thing_ with his lips and his tongue. The wine and the warm intimacy they had indulged in earlier had just pushed him to do what he already wanted to. Zero felt that he was being very honest with himself here. He had wanted those kisses. Kaname had wanted them too. Zero just hadn't realised how much it would affect them both. After all, the only other person he had kissed so intimately before was Yuuki. Unsurprisingly, the realisation only made him feel worse.

_First Yuuki and now Kaname._

Brother and sister. Both incredibly beautiful and perfect on the outside... and unbelievably sweet and giving on the inside. Zero groaned softly, dragging his hands through his hair again. He had given both of them their very first kiss. He could still recall kissing Yuuki after that school dance so many, many years ago. He could still remember how little he had slept that night, thrilled and terrified of her reaction the next day, knowing that she only thought of him as her brother. Then how the _hell_ do you think Kaname's feeling now? hissed the voice. Zero squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. It still wasn't fair to kiss her brother just because Kaname was around and she wasn't. Did that make him some sort of sick, sick person?

Of course not, you idiot! declared that voice exasperatedly, sounding as if it were stamping its feet, rolling its eyes and tearing out its hair all at the same time. Look, Kaname adored kissing you. And you know how he felt about Yuuki.

_I know! I know, all right? I know that she stole our hearts from the moment we first laid eyes on her, Kaname when she was born and I twelve years later._

So there's no need to freak out, right? asked the voice next, sounding as if it were gearing up to extract a promise. Zero raised his head and studied that perfectly structured profile again. He could feel the waves of desolation emanating from the pureblood and couldn't help but respond to that.

I won't, Zero promised silently. He might have resigned himself to being a made vampire, to enjoy having a youthful and strong body and a longer life span in exchange for taking blood but he knew he would never want to be a pureblood even if it were possible. Oh, you had privileges that others could only dream of and all the power in the world right at your fingertips but if you were anything like Kaname Kuran - and by now, Zero had a pretty clear picture of him - then you were doomed to an eternal life in which you could never ever completely let your guard down. Not even to indulge in life's pleasures, not even for brief affairs and briefer one night stands. You had to be in control at all times. You had to show that you were invincible and didn't have any weaknesses because you would always be desired and targeted by the unscrupulous.

But what if you did find someone you could trust completely, so completely that you could lower all your barriers in front of them and close your eyes in the sure knowledge that they would not hurt you for it? Zero swallowed. Kaname had done exactly that in the past couple of months. On the outside, he was the implacable and reassuring pureblood he had been throughout the years, self-sufficient and capable. On the inside though... Zero shivered involuntarily. All he knew was that Kaname's haunting vulnerability and almost childlike innocence must never be witnessed by anyone but himself. Any other vampire would see it as a disgraceful weakness to be taken advantage of and exploited but all Zero saw was an enchantingly vulnerable creature to be protected and cherished.

After all, Kaname trusted him implicitly, didn't he? With his blood and his craving. With his safety and his life. Zero couldn't pretend ignorance, not after what they had gone through - the touches and the feedings and the kisses, the confessions, the banter and the intimacy. It was just easier to pretend not to know but now that he _did_, he couldn't keep silent anymore. He could literally sense the waves of pain and humiliation crashing out from the lonely person standing in front of him, face still turned away as if deeply ashamed of his accidental confession.

Zero inhaled deeply and let it out. It was a confession that one shouldn't be ashamed of, actually. He found it rather... sweet. Unbelievably shocking no doubt, but it also left his heart swelling with an aching, wondering sort of tenderness and pride. So all he had to do now was apologise for bungling things up for the thousandth time and let it go.

"Kaname," Zero finally said awkwardly. "Look, I - I didn't mean it that way, you know I didn't."

"Of course you didn't," Kaname whispered. His reply was too fast. Too prepared as if he already knew what Zero was going to say. Zero gritted his teeth. This was why it was never a good idea to get too close to Kaname. How the hell had he thought that he could play with such beautiful fire and not get himself burned?

"I just hadn't thought – but it's fine. Really," Zero tried again. The dark head only dipped lower.

"I just don't know why it had to be me," Zero added with a touch more frankness than was possibly called for. Kaname squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head slowly. He couldn't answer that, not without seriously freaking Zero out.

"Kaname?" Zero's voice was starting to shake despite his resolve. Kaname's silence and guilty posture was another confession. Zero knew this one was going to snowball and crash right into him and leave his entire world upside down, he knew it! He was suddenly terrified.

"Why did you let me kiss you? Why did you let me be the first?"

Kaname's eyes started to burn and he hung his head lower. He had run out of excuses and patience and everything else that had sustained him for so many years now.

_Do you really, honestly not know, Zero Kiryuu? Have I not been pathetically transparent enough?_

Apparently not. Or Zero was just suffering from a huge case of denial again. Wouldn't be the first time. Kaname teetered on the brink of a decision. He wanted to give Zero more time but right now, he felt as if he just couldn't go on like this. He had thought that allowing Zero - or begging him, rather - to give him physical pleasure and comfort would help ease the loneliness that had enveloped him for so long, would help him survive while he waited for Zero to open his eyes. But it didn't. It only made it worse... like giving him a glimpse of heaven and telling him that he could only look and not touch. Only in this case, it was look and touch but remember that it was not yours to keep.

Kaname looked up and blinked rapidly to clear his vision. Should he tell his confused, honest, infuriating and wonderful hunter once and for all and just pray that everything would fall into its proper place and that the whole damned mess wouldn't explode in his face? Could he? Was he strong enough to face possible shock and rejection and perhaps even outright disgust?

There was... there was only one way to find out, right?

Kaname took a deep breath and swung around to face Zero. His hands were clenched tightly by his sides, his heart pounding in the miserable knowledge that once again, he was going to shock Zero speechless. So much for a relaxing holiday.

"Do you really, really want to know?" Kaname whispered.

Zero blinked. Kaname's eyes were burning with a desperation he had never seen before. The words reminded him of when they were in the bathroom earlier, before their nap. Kaname had merely asked then but now... now he looked like he was breaking up inside, trying in vain to hold back a secret that was just too huge, too _much_ to keep inside. Zero opened his mouth and closed it again. Did he? Did he really want to hear this? And just as immediately, he knew what the answer was.

_No. No, I don't. I don't want to hear this!_

Kaname took a step forward still with that fearful resigned desperation blazing from his eyes. Zero automatically took a step backwards, shaking his head.

"No. No, Kaname - you don't have to tell me... don't. Don't!"

Kaname only came closer, his breaths coming out in painful, shallow gasps. He was past patience and past waiting. He was past _everything_ except the burning urge inside his chest to lay everything bare, to put every single card he had on the table and put his life literally in Zero's hands. His control was wavering and Zero could feel it. Feel that pureblood aura fluctuating wildly in his hunter senses, now heightened to fever pitch. He took another step back and then another until his back bumped against the edge of a table.

"Don't, Kaname," Zero warned. His voice was shaking worse than ever. "Don't tell me - I mean it!"

Kaname froze at the stark, naked fear in those beloved eyes. It was the only thing that could have stopped him, the fact that even without blurting out his hopeless longing, he had once again succeeded in frightening Zero. Kaname felt the pain in his throat and chest worsen as if he had swallowed a huge burning lump of coal.

_Oh God._

He squeezed his eyes shut, barely feeling the scalding tears slipping down his cheeks. He breathed out a curse, making a superhuman effort to control the roiling, raging mess of emotions inside him. He had to contain the chaotic swell of emotions, he had to control his own breathing, inhaling and exhaling out with rigid precision. It didn't matter that with each exhalation, the flame of hope he had nurtured for so long grew a little dimmer.

When Kaname finally opened his eyes again, the insane desperation was gone and everything was calm once more. He even managed a gentle smile at Zero. Everything he felt inside was now under an iron blanket of resignation and self-denial. It was the only way he had survived all these years. And it was worth it, Zero had relaxed just a little, his confused blinking suggesting that he was shaking himself out of something.

"All right, Zero. I won't," Kaname whispered. It was madness, anyway. He had almost, _almost _ruined the beautiful fragile trust they had. What on earth had he been _thinking_? How could someone like Zero Kiryuu forget about his beloved wife in so short a time? Kaname would... would almost hate him for it. More relief flooded those beautiful amethyst eyes after a moment and Kaname managed another smile. It felt more real to him this time.

At that moment, a faint ray of light lit up Zero's silver hair and Kaname felt a very gentle warmth touch his back. If he turned around, he would see the first beginnings of a beautiful sunrise. But he didn't. It didn't matter to him anymore.

"It'll be dawn soon," he said softly. Zero nodded quickly, looking far more relieved than he would have liked.

"I - let's go inside," he suggested. "I'm ready to crash with the amount of food I have inside me."

It was slipping away from him again but Kaname nodded and followed Zero to the door, courteously opening it for him. He promised himself he wouldn't make the hunter anymore uncomfortable than he already was but as soon as they started up the staircase, he forgot.

"Will you - will you stay with me?" Kaname asked. Zero turned to him, his eyebrows pulling together in a confused frown. Kaname managed a self deprecating shrug.

"Just sleep," he said quietly. "Like how we did. Earlier."

Zero exhaled and then pressed his lips together. Every single innocent thing they did somehow never seemed quite as innocent after it happened. Even the tentative look Kaname gave him now looked more inviting than anything else. But – but –

Zero ran his fingers through his ruffled hair again. Look, the question is simple, he told himself exasperatedly. Do you want to or not? And the answer of course, was even simpler.

_Yes. Of course I want to._

"Just sleep, Kaname?" he asked, a wry smile touching his lips in spite of himself. Kaname nodded.

"Just sleep," he repeated. "I wouldn't say no if you wanted more but..." he broke off and shrugged again. Zero squinted at him and prudently decided Kaname was talking about being bitten again. He couldn't possibly be inviting Zero to - to do anything else. Could he? No. That was just the wine talking.

"Fine," he muttered and wasn't in the least bit surprised when his hand was taken in a gentle grasp as they headed upstairs.

- o -

It was funny how much sleep one seemed to need when one was on holiday and how one didn't manage to do all the other things one had planned on doing. Zero mused over this as he rubbed his bleary eyes, his head still feeling pleasantly muzzy. He didn't have to open his eyes to know that the pureblood was cuddled next to him, his back against his chest. Kaname had showered again before throwing on black silk pyjamas. He had graciously invited Zero to raid his wardrobe but the latter declined, content with stripping off his T-shirt and slacks to sleep in his boxers. Kaname looked more than happy at the sight, quickly shutting his wardrobe door as if retracting his invitation.

Zero smiled sleepily and yawned, unconsciously sliding his legs against Kaname's silk clad ones, reveling in the slippery sensation of skin warmed silk against his bare legs. A thought came to him and he tensed. Slowly, he slid his arms free and got out of bed as silently as he could. He didn't remember brushing his teeth before sleeping - an oversight that could also be attributed to the wine. Zero slipped into the bathroom where he used the toilet and after forcing the rational part of his mind down, used Kaname's toothbrush as well. Better than nothing. Besides, it looked new. And after all those kisses, he doubted Kaname would mind too much.

_All those kisses..._

Zero avoided looking at his reflection. If he was confused before about the terms of their 'arrangement' then he now was well and truly... truly... more confused. Zero grimaced at his stunning grasp of vocabulary and walked back to the bedroom. He squatted by the nightstand beside the bed, finding the dials on the master control board affixed to the nightstand by touch alone. The bedroom was pitch black which was apparently how Kaname liked it but Zero didn't like the idea of bumping into things. He found the dial that controlled the room lights and twisted it enough just to provide a dim glow. Better.

Zero knew he should be going back to his room to sleep some more. He should... but the moment he glanced at Kaname, he knew he wasn't going to. The pureblood looked utterly beautiful asleep with his long eyelashes fanning his cheeks, dark locks half spread across the snowy white pillow and his face peaceful in slumber. Before he knew it, Zero was sliding under the sheets again, curling up behind the slender figure. There was just the softest murmur and then Kaname turned around to rest his head on Zero's shoulder, one elegant hand resting on his chest and one long leg going over Zero's thighs. With a resigned sigh and a smile, Zero breathed in the pureblood's sweet scent, his arm curling around the silk clad shoulders as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

The next time Zero awoke, Kaname had shifted, his body now half covering Zero's. He was still sleeping though. Zero repressed a chuckle, a distant memory unfolding in his mind. Ichiru and Isamu had come down with a high fever when they were six, just after their fangs sprouted for the first time. Zero decided to sleep in their room so that Yuuki could catch up on her rest after a trying, stress filled day. He was lying on the lower bunk of the twins' double-decker bed with Isamu but ten minutes later, Ichiru decided that big brother or not, he wasn't going to stay on the top bunk any longer, not when his twin looked so comfortable nestled against his father's side. In the end, both boys fell into a restless sleep while Zero stayed wide awake the whole time, sweating profusely with two clingy hot water bottles practically lying on top of him.

He sighed soundlessly. Memories like this inevitably made him think of Yuuki again and with it came that familiar bittersweet ache in his chest. Zero bit his lip, staring straight up at the darkened ceiling, aware of the sting in his eyes and the hot flush of guilt travelling up his neck and filling his face. What would his dearest say to him if she could see him now? No matter how Zero looked at it, he was guilty. He no longer felt like jumping away from Kaname or freaking out over how close they had become but honestly, was this strange acceptance any better? How could it be? Yes, they weren't hurting other people with their actions but thinking that this was just 'comfort' didn't lessen the guilt. It was more than that. Much, much more.

Zero was no longer biting Kaname to stave off madness or to heal from injuries. He was actively making their feeding sessions last longer and more pleasurable for each other. He was enjoying the fact that his fangs and his touch could render Kaname Kuran helpless and beautifully desperate. He was eager, even right now if it came to that, to enjoy the exquisite sight of Kaname writhing in ecstasy and to be the one to make it happen. In other words, he was guilty for enjoying all of that and even more so for not wanting to stop. He sighed and tried to gently push Kaname off of him but the dark head lifted instead. Zero was instantly captivated by the open, sleepy depths of those chocolate eyes, rendered even more beautiful in the dim light. He would bet everything he owned that he was the only one who got to see them like that.

"Hey," he whispered and Kaname smiled, looking adorably shy.

"Hey," he managed, reluctantly sliding off of Zero's chest and making the hunter groan as warm silk slithered over his nipples, rendering them hard in the blink of an eye. He turned to face Kaname and propped his head up on one hand, unwilling to dwell any longer on his thoughts.

"So, had enough sleep for now?" he asked and absently wondered why it seemed so natural to be in the same bed as Kaname when the very thought would have freaked him out just a couple of months ago. His head still felt a little heavy but it was nowhere near a hangover, not even a headache. Just a warm fuzziness that made him feel as if everything was right with the world. Chalk up one more benefit of pure blood - keeping hangovers away.

"Yes," Kaname mirrored his position, nodding solemnly for emphasis, like how a child would.

"Want to get up then?" Zero asked next, strangely reluctant to do so. It was still early - just after two in the afternoon, he noted from the clock on Kaname's nightstand. Not that he could see outside for the drapes at the windows blocked out everything.

"No," Kaname decided, shaking his head with the same solemnity as he had nodded it earlier. Zero grinned.

"So, sleep some more then?" he asked patiently. Kaname yawned delicately, covering his mouth with his hand but he still shook his head, the faintest hint of a pout on his lips. Then those eyes looked at him directly and Zero's mouth went dry.

"Kiss. Then bite. Then..." Kaname shrugged and blushed, his eyes impish and hopeful. Zero couldn't help grinning. Kaname's one track mind was childlike and predictable but adorably so. Damnit if his body wasn't already stirring with interest.

"You know something?" he whispered. Kaname shook his head, his eyes instantly curious.

"I don't actually mind," Zero confessed. He chuckled as Kaname's eyes went wide with delight.

"Must be the blasted wine," Zero excused his behaviour as he sat up. Kaname smiled as he mirrored Zero's action, making a mental note to get Seiren to order another crate of the same wine. Zero leaned forward then and Kaname sighed happily against his mouth. The kiss remained sweet and soft, just lips sliding against each other and teeth teasing and holding but not biting. Eventually, tongues touched tentatively before the two mouths smiled again, Zero's fingers sliding into silky soft raven tresses as he tugged Kaname closer. The pureblood made a soft sound in his throat as he slid his hands up Zero's strong shoulders.

_No. Make that two crates._

Under Zero's coaxing, Kaname's lips parted willingly. Zero explored that warm sweet mouth thoroughly with his tongue, reveling in every tiny sound Kaname made. A part of him was leaning towards urgency, wanting to deepen the kiss and perhaps even bite and nip a little but Zero resisted. There was no rush and besides, Kaname felt so much more delicious like this, trembling in his arms and emitting soft little gasps. At length, Zero's mouth drifted to the side of those perfect lips and that graceful jaw, pressing slow and tender kisses as he went. He leisurely worked his way downward, worshipping the creamy skin, driving Kaname to sweet distraction as his fingers flicked open the buttons of his pyjama shirt at the same time.

Kaname was even more delicious when he had only just woken up, his body sleep soft, warm and pliant. Zero rose up onto his knees and bent Kaname backwards. He kept one hand splayed on the mattress while his other slid out of the dark hair to support the slender back as he slowly lowered the pureblood onto the sheets, his mouth busy laying kisses on the graceful neck. Never before had Kaname felt so... cherished, so cared for. He laid back on the bed with a murmur of contentment and wound his arms and legs around Zero, arching his neck in silent invitation. He would never deny Zero this. Never.

_Three crates. Hell, four. As many as they have. As many as it took to keep Zero in this mood..._

Despite the needle sharp fangs already pricking his skin, Kaname still thought that Zero moved too slowly. That skillful mouth teased and sucked, the warm tongue licked and soon, Kaname was trembling and clinging onto Zero, making those adorable whimpering noises in his throat. At length, the hunter shuddered and pushed his fangs in and even then it was _still too slow_. Slow, tender sips that made Kaname writhe on the bed. He wanted Zero to drink deeply from his neck... and yet, it was better like this even though it ached. It allowed Kaname to savour each and every exquisite moment with ample time to store it carefully in his memory before going on to the next.

The joyful rush of his blood in his veins with every single drop quivering and longing to leave his body to nourish and sate his beloved hunter.

The trembling of his limbs twining and sliding around Zero's hard body, longing to draw him closer than was physically possible.

The pulsing of his arousal thickening and leaking inside his trousers, yearning to feel those strong fingers around it, to be teased and stroked until it could swell no more, until it exploded with the force of his love and joy.

Kaname allowed his hips to rock up to Zero's, enjoying the delicious friction caused by the damp silk against Zero's muscular thigh. There was a groan at his throat and Zero pressed him down harder into the bed, taking over and sensuously rocking their hips together until Kaname shuddered beautifully at the sensations, helpless tears pooling in his eyes. Desperately, he caught at his bottom lip and tried to think of work, of projects and proposals, God _anything_ to make him last longer than two seconds. Almost immediately though, the fangs slid out of his neck and the lips left his skin in a swift kiss.

"Kaname?" Zero sounded worried again but Kaname swallowed and shook his head.

"I'm fine," he whispered, not daring to look at Zero.

_I'm fine, Zero. Just an emotional wreck and falling to pieces so please just touch me or I will die._

"Hmm," Zero said softly exactly as if he had heard Kaname's silent deprecating thoughts. Then a warm tongue was licking his sensitive bite area and Kaname arched his neck, his hips shifting restlessly again. Zero took half a dozen or so sips but at length, he straightened up with a groan that felt like music to Kaname's ears.

"Here, let me hold you."

Kaname blinked in surprise when he was pulled up, fingers threading through his hair to hold his head to Zero's chest. Kaname couldn't understand it. There was no exclamation of surprise, no suspicious 'why's' about the tears, no recriminations, no apologies. He tried to raise his head but Zero's hand kept it in place.

"Shh, it's OK," he whispered. For once, Kaname allowed himself to believe in it. He clung to Zero, delightfully light headed and thrilled at being in the safe strong arms of his beloved. Presently, Kaname found himself being shifted again. This time, Zero leaned back against the pillows at the headboard and Kaname found himself leaning against that strong chest with those long legs on either side of him.

"Do you still want this?" came Zero's whisper at his ear even as a knowing fingertip slowly slid down over his chest in teasing little circles, leisurely circling each hardened nipple, nail just teasing the very tips and causing Kaname to jerk helplessly with twin moans. The finger then trailed lower, languidly circling his navel before stopping at the elasticised waistband of his pajama trousers. Kaname's needy flesh swelled and throbbed. He nodded jerkily, almost embarrassing himself by thrusting his hips up to try to get that annoying finger to slide further down.

"Always, Zero. Always," he groaned. Then he was being pulled further up, shuddering as he felt Zero's stiffened nipples drag against his bare back. Capable if slightly shaking hands slid his pyjama bottoms swiftly over his hips and down his legs. Kaname tilted his head back to smile at Zero, not even a jot of shyness left in him as he felt hot, worshipping eyes on his proud, leaking erection.

"Beautiful," came the throaty whisper at his ear. "So perfect..."

Kaname leaned back, surrendering completely to Zero's touch. It was still slow and unhurried as though they had nothing else to indulge in but this one single activity. Zero moved slowly, almost painfully so. Kaname's blood was rushing inside him, awakening and energising but the lingering effects of the wine tempered that. It made him feel as if he were submerged in water - everything seemed a little distant and muffled. The physical sensations were there and felt as good as ever but the sharp edge had been taken off, allowing Zero a measure of control over his desire. He took hold of it with alacrity, using it to pleasure Kaname with a finesse he hadn't known he possessed.

His left hand reached out towards the nightstand, grabbing tissues from a handsome wooden box before coaxing the room light just a little bit brighter. Zero enjoyed himself thoroughly as he stroked and touched, alternating between fingertips, the palm of his hand and his knuckles, switching from a firm touch to light to teasingly light and back again. Kaname writhed about helplessly, long fingers clenching on the silk sheets, panting moans escaping from his open mouth as his long legs slid restlessly against the sheets and Zero's legs. He felt so boneless he was sliding lower down, his arms unable to support his weight. Zero paused for a torturous moment to pull Kaname higher up against his sweat dampened chest, both their breaths hissing out as the movement rubbed Kaname's back against Zero's stiffened nipples once more. Zero swooped down to capture Kaname's mouth and this time, the kiss was scorching. Kaname opened his mouth and received Zero's tongue happily, stroking it with his own and sucking it deep into his mouth again and again until Zero was shaking and muttering feverish curses against his lips. He finally tore his lips away from Kaname's sweetly intoxicating mouth and tightened his grip around the latter's leaking erection. Kaname moaned, his buttocks giving the most delicious friction to Zero's aching, leaking hardness even through his shorts.

The slow love making eventually became too torturous to maintain. Zero shuddered and stepped up the pace, fisting Kaname tightly and without mercy. One. Two. Three. Fou - Kaname's back arched up from Zero's, a choked scream tearing from his throat as he fell into a release that ripped through his body like a thunderstorm. Zero was ready for it. He captured each spurt of the creamy liquid neatly in the snowy folds of the tissues he had taken earlier, his other hand coaxing persuasively and relentlessly. Kaname's body jerked again and again, in tune with the helpless cries Zero was getting addicted to. A dozen convulsions later, Kaname fell back against him, gasping and shivering.

A smile of utmost satisfaction curled Zero's lips as he tightened his arms around Kaname and pressed a kiss to his cheek. His chest was still heaving and he was very, very close to exploding himself but he still waited, giving Kaname that moment of utter bliss. Absently, he balled up the soaked tissues in his fist and set them aside. He then told hold of Kaname's arms to ease him to the side, aching to go to the bathroom to see to his own need.

Kaname moved first. His body was still shaking with aftershocks of bliss and glowing with satisfaction but there was no time to rest. He spun around so that he was crouched beside Zero's hips, lifted the damp boxers carefully off the hunter's aching erection and slid them off his legs all in the space of one single second. Zero stuttered and made a belated and futile grab for his underwear which was already sailing gracefully over the foot of the bed.

"Kaname - I can -" he broke off as Kaname's head came up. The dark eyes were still soft with bliss but the word 'predator' suddenly struck Zero. Without a word, he recognised on a subconscious level that the balance of control had somehow shifted. Despite his experience as a married man and lover, Zero's cheeks flushed deeply at the intent way Kaname was looking down at his twitching erection. He felt an embarrassing urge to cover himself and forced himself not to. The low growl that just caught at the edge of his hearing didn't help either.

Zero shifted uncomfortably and Kaname looked up, not bothering to hide his intent.

"No. Kaname, I'm - I'll... just..."

Kaname shook his head gently.

"No more escaping to the bathroom," he admonished in the solemn tone he had used before. Zero stared at him. Where was that enchanting creature who had writhed about and made those adorable soft little mewling cries just a bare minute ago?

"Please, Zero. Allow me," Kaname whispered with just a hint of a teasing smile on his lips. He slid gracefully across Zero's thigh so that he was crouched between the hunter's legs. Then he bent over and Zero's mouth fell open.

"Damnit - aah...!"

Zero shifted wildly, thighs almost suffocating Kaname as he attempted to scoot away - unsuccessfully since he was already up against the headboard. The dark head came up again.

"No. Sorry, Zero," Kaname whispered. Zero felt the air around him shift and then he couldn't move his legs anymore. In a split second, his wide eyed stare turned into a narrowed glare.

"Kaname," he warned in a low voice, torn between shock, betrayal and arousal. Kaname had never _ever_ done this to him before.

"Never to hurt you, Zero," Kaname whispered and the earnest open look in his eyes rendered Zero speechless. "Never to hurt you just... please, please allow me..."

Zero clenched his jaw, annoyed at how fast his anger could dissipate in the wake of sudden overwhelming urge to say 'yes'. A second later, he was completely bowled over when soft lips and a wet tongue touched him.

"Damnit, agh, don't - you don't - you can't want to...!" Zero hissed raggedly, his hands fisting helplessly in the sheet. He could still twitch and shift about but his arms and legs were being held down by Kaname's will. He couldn't move them much and he obviously couldn't push Kaname away. His buttocks on the other hand, felt like they were glued to the bed. Zero should be spitting mad. He was and yet, this unexpected and unseen bondage only made him harder, partly because of how beautifully Kaname had worded his plea. Zero flushed in complete embarrassment and was mortified when he did so.

Kaname smiled at his predicament, leaving Zero speechless and almost fuming. The dark eyes now had a look of unmistakable mischief as they took in the pink flush on his beloved hunter's face.

"But if I do want to?" he asked gently. Zero groaned. Kaname momentarily lifted his will a little, allowing Zero to move his hands. The moment Zero realised this and reached for Kaname, the pureblood immobilised his arms again, not allowing those hands to go anywhere near his head.

"You can't _want_ to," Zero insisted, embarrassed when the words left his lips in a shaky whisper instead of the strident tones he had wanted. Kaname just nodded in reply.

"Hold still," he whispered. "I'm not very - I haven't.. but I think you'll... like..."

When he bent his head, Zero exhaled out a curse and squeezed his eyes shut. It wasn't the first time someone had gone down on him, Yuuki had done so quite a few times when her menses inconvenienced them both or during the advanced months of her pregnancies but - he cut off his thoughts. He wanted this so badly he was trembling and thinking of anyone else at this moment was just wrong. It was a good thing he couldn't last long because he was blushing hotly at the very thought of who was the one crouching between his legs with those dark silky tresses brushing his inner thighs. Barely half a minute later, he was thrashing about, or would have if he weren't being held down by Kaname's will. The pureblood was inexperienced but his mouth was hot and wet. He was oh, so _willing_ and that alone was enough to sweep Zero close to the edge.

"Kaname, g-get off! I - I'm going to.. arrghhh..."

If anything, Kaname only took him deeper, resolve and iron will allowing him to swallow Zero almost to the hilt. Yuuki had never - it wasn't possible - with a hoarse cry that Zero was sure had never left his lips before, he exploded magnificently inside Kaname's willing mouth, his heart pounding hard inside his chest as his body convulsed and shook in a release that seemed to go on forever. When it was finally over, Zero lay almost insensate for several minutes with spots dancing merrily in front of his eyes. He was unable to move as Kaname fussed adorably around him, wiping him clean and then pulling the sheets over his heaving, glistening chest. When he could finally shift his limbs, Zero reached for Kaname with hands that trembled, not sure if he should shake him or hug him or just whack him over the head.

"Kaname, you -" Zero broke off, chest still heaving. He shook his head slowly. "I'm not sure I liked how you held me down and damnit, why the _hell_ did you _do_ that?"

Kaname ducked his head, cheeks flushing softly. The confident and earnest smile had disappeared again. When he peeped up at Zero through his bangs, he looked like a child who had been caught doing something wrong.

"Sorry," he whispered. "I'm sorry, Zero, but you're always escaping. I don't want you to. "

Zero glared at him but it was difficult to maintain when those chocolate eyes looked so huge and earnest and those lips looked so rosy and swollen. In the end, Zero surprised them both by kissing Kaname. Hard. The pureblood's still tingling lips parted willingly and he heard the hunter gasp. Zero could taste himself. Kaname had swallowed but apparently not thoroughly enough. Zero squirmed in renewed embarrassment, kissing Kaname even harder as if to punish him. It wasn't... uhm, it wasn't as if he hadn't tasted himself before but oh God, this was _embarrassing_. Zero shut his mind to both his prudish sounding thoughts and the hysterical laughter echoing inside his head. He kissed Kaname again. Even harder than before.

Unsurprisingly, Kaname was sparkly eyed after those kisses, so happy he was near tears. Zero rolled his eyes and gave up. He wriggled a little lower so that his head was resting on the pillow, relieved about one thing at least. This session had ended quite cleanly since he had the foresight to use tissues on Kaname and the latter has used his, uhm... Well, the bed was clean, anyway. Zero huffed to himself as Kaname promptly nestled against him, feeling and sounding very content to curl into Zero's side with his head on the hunter's shoulder.

"I'm glad I did that," he whispered. Zero didn't bother to open his eyes.

"Bet you are."

Kaname gave another pretty yawn.

"Yes, I am. So we can cuddle," he replied with just a hint of admonishment in his voice. Zero sighed and realised he had a point.

"You could've just used your hand, you know," he mumbled. He had a feeling he should be worried about something but his brain wasn't working very well after that astounding orgasm. It was practically shutting down on itself.

"Not the same thing."

They were silent for a minute or so. Then Kaname roused himself.

"Zero?"

"Mmm?"

"Let me take care of you each time, OK?"

Kaname sounded like he was pleading. Or cajoling. Or just being the expertly wheedling pureblood Zero knew he was. He tried to think of an excuse, couldn't and decided it was useless to argue since Kaname had already pleasured him so intimately.

"I - all right but uhm, we should get up," Zero murmured to the ceiling although his fingers were still tracing small circles on Kaname's smooth damp shoulder blade. The pureblood shivered in delight, both at the caress and at Zero's words.

"We're on holiday," he murmured and cuddled closer.

"Yeah," Zero mumbled back, his body sated and still feeling remarkably boneless. His eyelids were feeling heavy again.

"Well, maybe half an hour more..."

In a few seconds, both had fallen back asleep.

- o -

The next time they woke up, it was way past breakfast. Zero escaped to his own room to shower before Kaname could say anything about sharing. When they went downstairs, they found Seiren waiting for them. She lost no time in asking Kaname if she should get them breakfast or lunch.

In light of the heavy barbeque dinner they had, Kaname requested for something light before they went to the first floor verandah again. Soon, they were served fresh strawberries, toast and butter together with piping hot coffee and tea. They ate in silence but it was a pleasant one especially with Kaname looking more than pleased with himself. Zero decided not to show the exasperation he felt inside. He finally remembered that in agreeing to Kaname's suggestion earlier, he was breaking his promise for the two of them to find sexual release separately, not together. Sighing, he carried his second cup of coffee and went to lean against the stone balustrade. He sipped at his beverage, ignoring the darkened scenery outside in favour of looking at Kaname who was now putting the last mouthful of toast into his mouth.

"You know something?" Zero asked suddenly. Kaname only raised his eyebrows as he chewed.

"You might actually get fat if you carry on like this," Zero said solemnly. "If you continue for the next fifty years or so..."

Kaname pouted at him. In spite of himself, Zero grinned. He came closer and placed his coffee cup on the table, intent on capturing that beautiful pouting mouth once more. The dark chocolate eyes started to sparkle and Kaname swallowed the rest of his toast as quickly as he could, taking a hasty swallow of tea to help it on its way. Zero's grin widened and he quirked an eyebrow at Kaname as he drew closer.

"What's the hurry?" he teased. Kaname blushed, vexed at himself. He was so sure Zero was going to kiss him. He dropped his gaze but a throaty chuckle made him look up again. This time, Zero's face was just inches away from his.

"You were right, you know," he whispered and closed the gap between them. Kaname tilted his head back willingly. He honestly didn't know how Zero could be so skittish one moment and so passionate the next but as long as this lasted, he wasn't going to complain.

_Perhaps I don't even need the wine..._

The kiss lasted a long time but it was as sweet as the ones before. Kaname sighed when it ended, his body humming pleasantly. He chuckled softly when Zero teasingly bumped their noses together before kissing him again. The painful moment when Kaname had shocked the hunter with his accidental confession already seemed a lifetime ago. He was right not to confess then with Zero looking so skittish and fearful. But Zero was looking straight at him now and smiling warmly at him and everything felt so right to Kaname, he couldn't believe it. It was time.

"Zero?"

"Yes?"

"Please sit down."

Zero blinked, looking as if what Kaname said was totally incomprehensible.

"What?"

Kaname gestured gracefully to the chair opposite him and inclined his head.

"Please - sit down."

Zero reached out and grabbed the back of the chair, sinking down into it.

"Let me speak, all right?" Kaname requested gently. His unexpectedly serious tone pricked a tiny hole in Zero's euphoria. Kaname took a deep breath and smiled. A calm and gentle smile, one strangely at odds with the look in his eyes, a look made up of peace and resignation and sadness and resolve. The hole got a little bigger and Zero had that funny feeling again, where his whole world was going to turn upside down again. When Kaname leaned forward, Zero just only managed to stop himself from leaning back.

"Kaname?"

"All these years, Zero," Kaname started, "when I watched you and Yuuki together, I felt... envy."

Zero shrugged. Kaname didn't have to remind him of how lonely he had been.

"Because Yuuki was the most wonderful person in the world? I was lucky, Kaname. I know it. I have always known it."

Zero's voice had turned a little husky with emotion. He didn't know why Kaname was talking about Yuuki now – just after they had kissed in fact - but he honestly didn't mind. Zero's words filled Kaname with both happiness and sorrow, opposing emotions that crowded his heart at the same time. He wondered how could he have survived so long like this.

"You were," he replied huskily. "But that's not why I was envious."

A tendril of uneasiness uncurled in Zero's stomach. He ignored it.

"Because I took good care of her and never even thought about anyone else?"

"Yes. You took very good care of her," Kaname agreed softly, feeling both pride and sadness. "Yuuki could not have chosen a better man."

Zero nodded, a frown drawing his eyebrows together. The uneasy feeling in his stomach increased a little. He should change the subject but he didn't. He had interrupted Kaname's two attempts earlier and didn't feel he should do it a third time. Kaname kept his gaze on Zero's face. He had vacillated over this so many times but it was gnawing at him and it wasn't ever going to stop until he said it. He felt as if he couldn't get past another day still holding it inside him. Zero was receptive now. Calm. In a good mood. There - there probably wasn't going to be a better time.

Now that he had made up his mind, Kaname felt as if he were walking steadily towards the edge of a chasm. He didn't know how deep it was or what was waiting for him at the bottom. He just knew that he was walking steadily towards it and that he was not stopping. He moistened his lips and swallowed, once again noting how it drew Zero's attention to his mouth.

_Yes. It is time to let you know how I feel._

"I didn't envy what you had, Zero. I envied what _she _had."

The uneasy feeling in Zero's stomach was making him very uncomfortable. Was this the conversation that Kaname had tried to have earlier?

"What are you saying?" he whispered. Kaname licked his lips again, noting the nervous look in those amethyst eyes. Perhaps he shouldn't. No, he should. Oh God, he didn't know - perhaps there would never be a perfect time and he just had to grab his chance and pray that it would work out in the end.

_Just don't hate me, Zero._

"I envied the love she had," Kaname blurted out in a rush, knowing that his usual eloquence had again deserted him. Each time he needed it the most, it vanished. Zero blinked.

"Kaname," he began carefully. "Are you trying to say that you want to experience the love Yuuki and I had with someone?"

_Oh God, how can you be so close and yet so far...!_

Kaname had reached the edge of that unknown chasm. The wind was blowing in his hair and he was all alone. There was no one to guide him or to let him know if his decision was sound or not.

_But I can't hold it back any longer. I - I don't want to._

"I envied her because she had the love of a wonderful man," he confessed. Zero went pale. He should stop Kaname. He should stop him _right now_.

"Stop. Enough, Kaname," he almost snapped at the pureblood. It was due to fear more than anger. Kaname shook his head doggedly, his eyes gaining a sheen that made Zero gulp. Kaname realised he was breathing erratically again. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

_For better or for worse. Come what may._

"I envied Yuuki, Zero, because..."

Kaname stared straight into the increasingly wide eyes of his beloved hunter.

_I want you to know this._

"Because I love the man who loved her," he said. He had taken that leap of faith. He was falling into the chasm with his eyes closed and his arms outstretched, trusting... hoping... believing in spite of all the odds stacked against him that that someone would catch him in his strong arms and keep him safe.

"I love you, Zero," Kaname finished quietly, his eyes holding Zero's utterly shell shocked gaze.

_I have loved you for years._

- Chapter End -


	24. Chapter 24: The Compromise

**Author Notes: **Hello, everyone! Thank you so much for your favs, alerts and especially your reviews! It took me two hours to get through them but I loved each and every one. My apologies for the delay in getting this chapter out and as always, I hope you enjoy it :D

- Chapter Start -

"You wh-what?" Zero stammered. He looked bewildered. Terrified even.

"I love you," Kaname repeated. "I'm _in_ love with you," he added, just in case his beloved hunter tried escaping down the path of denial again. He certainly didn't look like he was going to catch Kaname after his proverbial leap of faith. This was not good. Kaname felt his entire body flush, his heart pounding hard and fast. He drew a trembling breath and looked down, biting his lip almost viciously.

_What did you expect? That Zero would smile from ear to ear and declare the same thing back to you? That this would end in happily ever after?_

Kaname belatedly realised he had put too much stock in the tender kisses and erotic intimacy of the past couple of days. He was going to pay the price for entertaining such foolish hopes. With a resigned sigh, he bowed his head and waited for the inevitable explosion.

"You - me - what? That's impossible! How can you?" Zero demanded, sounding angry and frightened all at the same time. Kaname looked up bravely and lifted a shoulder in a shrug.

"Why not?" he countered. "You're so easy to love, Zero. Throughout the years, I've watched you with Yuuki. You've made her very happy."

Zero cursed under his breath, raking angry hands through his hair. He looked away, looked at everywhere except the earnest pureblood sitting in front of him. He knew there was a reason why he hadn't wanted to hear this before and he was right. Kaname had yanked the rug out from under his feet, turned his world upside down. So much so that Zero wasn't sure if it would ever right itself. How could it?

"You're insane," he muttered at last. However much he wanted to pretend that Kaname was only pulling his leg, he couldn't. Kaname had already left half a dozen rather obvious clues as to how he felt - from craving his bite, to crumbling under his stern words, to obeying his orders to the letter, to constantly touching him, to sleeping soundly in his presence, to confessing to his first kiss... the clues were there all along. Zero just hadn't wanted to notice. He supposed he already suspected Kaname's feelings for him were more than just brotherly. They were - in hindsight - kinda hard to miss, particularly in light of the activities they had indulged in and how... how vulnerable the pureblood let himself be around him.

"I'm insane? Why? For loving you?" Kaname asked, a wry twist to his lips. He was still shaking inside but immensely relieved they were still talking. Perhaps Zero wouldn't really freak out. Perhaps he had already known it seeing as how pathetically transparent his brother-in-law had behaved recently. Perhaps everything would be all right.

"Tell me you're joking, Kaname! This isn't funny, you know!" Zero shouted suddenly, glaring at him.

_I was wrong. He is going to freak out._

Kaname took a deep breath and shook his head slowly from side to side. Zero groaned, tilting his head back and jamming the heels of both hands into his eyes. If he could think rationally, he would know that it was insane to expose his throat in front of a vampire but he was in total shock. Justified shock. After all... Zero jerked his head back down and glared at Kaname again.

"You're Yuuki's brother! You can't love me. It's wrong!"

Kaname again shook his head, his heart crumbling inside him.

"I don't see anything wrong with me loving you," he said steadily. He already loved them all - Yuuki, Zero, Yuko and the twins. To fall in love with Zero was just taking it a small step further – Kaname was there before he even realised what had happened. As for it being wrong in the ways Zero hadn't even mentioned, then yes. There were a hundred obstacles against such a relationship. Pacifist and co-existance views had come far but not that far as to encourage a union between a pureblood and a vampire hunter that was based on love and respect rather than ownership and protection. This wasn't going to be easy and once Zero got over his shock – Kaname refused to think of any other alternative - they would have to be very careful. He refused to think of it as wrong though. It was more right than a whole lot of other things he could think of.

"I don't just love you, Zero. I am also in love with you," he repeated. "There is a difference."

Zero's hands clenched into fists as if Kaname was patronising him.

"I know what the difference is!" he hissed angrily, cheeks flushed bright pink. "And you are _not_ supposed to be in love with me!"

"Why not?" Kaname countered softly, keeping his hands in his lap to stop himself from reaching out to his beloved hunter who looked wonderfully adorable, all flushed and angry.

"Because! Because I'm your brother-in-law! A vampire hunter! Have you forgotten all that? And you never said a word!"

Kaname tilted his head, wondering which comment to respond to first. He decided on last in, first out.

"I told you before. I would never take Yuuki's happiness away, no matter what the reason," he replied steadily, holding those confused and angry amethyst eyes with his honest gaze. He didn't have to lie this time, he only had to state the truth and that was so much easier because he didn't have to think of ambiguous words or vague suggestions. Just the truth, plain and unvarnished. The words came easily to him now. Smoother. More persuasive. Hopefully more compelling.

"You were married to her, Zero. Your love belonged to her. All I could do was wait. I was resolved to wait because I knew that you would outlive her in the end. It - it was inevitable. She was human but you - you are not."

Kaname's eloquence deserted him at the end, the words felt as if they were sticking in his throat. Every time he thought about what his mother sacrificed for Yuuki, he wanted to cry. It had been a dual sacrifice. Yuuki had had to give up something in return and she hadn't even known it at that time nor for many years afterwards. Her immortality, her heritage and with it, the immunity against petty human diseases. In the end, that was what killed her. Kaname struggled to gain control of himself as his heart contracted in pain. It was several moments before he could speak again.

"I truly didn't expect her to leave us so soon, Zero. I thought that I would have to wait another thirty, forty years but I was prepared to."

Kaname blinked away the tears in his eyes, seeing the same grief in the amethyst ones looking back at him. He had surrendered every secret to Zero now. This had been the very last one. He had nothing left to hide now, nothing left to lose.

"Only she left sooner than we thought, while you - Zero, you have taken my blood for years now. It has lengthened your life span and kept you young. You don't look a day over twenty five."

It honestly didn't matter to Kaname how Zero looked. And it wouldn't matter in the end because the hunter would still grow old and die before him but Kaname refused to think of that now. He would break down completely if he did. All that mattered was the present - the next twenty, thirty, fifty, hundred years. As many as he could get with Zero beside him.

Zero stared at him with panic in his eyes. He was only hearing half of what Kaname said, the other half being occupied with not freaking out. All in all, he rather thought he was handling this situation quite calmly. Perhaps the fact that he had somehow - at the back of his mind- already suspected it made it just a little bit easier.

"Kaname, you know I love Yuuki and her alone," he began, his throat painfully tight. "I didn't even want to live on the day we - we lost her."

_I wanted to live even less on the day we buried her._

"I know," Kaname whispered. "I _know_. I know you loved her with all your heart. I am truly glad you shared your life and your love with her and with your children."

Zero made a small sound of protest and Kaname exhaled. He lifted his arms and reached out across the table, placing his hands gently on the hunter's shoulders.

"Listen to me, Zero. You have a wonderful capacity for loving. Please don't throw it away now that she's gone, now that Yuko and Ichiru and Isamu are already grown up."

The mention of his children's names made Zero's head snap up, amethyst eyes suddenly stormy. He shrugged Kaname's hands off his shoulders.

"So what do you want me to do - forget about them?"

Kaname hurriedly shook his head, horrified that his beloved hunter had misconstrued his meaning.

"No! No, not forget about them but I - they can manage. They're not alone, they have someone in their lives whereas I..."

Kaname swallowed convulsively and turned his head to the side. The enormity of what he was saying crashed down upon him and made him shudder. Right at this moment, he felt more alone than he had ever felt before.

"Whereas I don't. I don't have anyone," he whispered. He closed his eyes but a tear slipped out and Zero stared at it, speechless. He had no idea what to say. This was Kaname Kuran! How could he not have anyone he wanted? Yes, he knew what the pureblood was like but it wasn't fair to include him in this mess! Zero jumped to his feet and rounded the table in two long strides. He grabbed Kaname's arms and pulled him to his feet, heedless of the rough scrape of the chair legs against the tiles as it went skittering back.

"Listen to me, Kaname. You can have anyone you choose," he said steadily. Kaname started to shake his head at the accusing tone and then he nodded dejectedly. Theoretically speaking, Zero was right.

"Perhaps," he whispered. "But I don't want anyone except you," he added in the same, almost shy whisper. Zero blinked. He was deeply annoyed, embarrassed beyond belief and more confused than he had ever felt in his whole life.

"Why, for Pete's sake?" he asked exasperatedly. "Is it because you trust me? Well, there are other –"

Kaname shook his head as if he wasn't even listening to him.

"No. No one else. Zero, do you think you could? Love me, I mean. N-not now of course but... in time?"

Zero pressed his lips together. The distant thought that anyone would jump at this chance was not lost on him, nor was the incoherent shouting of the voice inside his head.

Could he learn to love Kaname?

It was... it was actually a distinct possibility. The fact that he could even come to this conclusion so fast terrified him. But it was true, wasn't it? How could he say no when Kaname's words didn't fill him with revulsion or disgust? How could he say no when he respected the pureblood and cared deeply for him? How could he say no after sharing so many beautiful, intimate moments with him?

But how could he say yes? It was insane! Kaname was just asking him this because - because of his craving, right?

"Is it because I've been drinking your blood all these years? Is that it?"

The pureblood shook his head slowly. Zero exhaled and glared at him.

"Well, is it because we've kissed and uhm - you know -"

Kaname shook his head, too despondent to even smile at Zero's awkwardness.

"If it were just sexual attraction, I would be tempted to think so," he murmured and the fact that he could reply Zero's question without any hesitation at all showed that he had considered the possibility before. Zero glanced away, his flush growing deeper.

"So it's not just - er, lust?" he mumbled. A faint smile appeared on Kaname's lips at last.

"I'm afraid not," he said, almost apologetically. "I don't just want to make love with you, Zero."

_Even though I already love what we do. Even though I want more. _

"I also want to be with you, to protect you and take care of you in every way possible. I also... I want so much for you to care for me in return."

Zero sighed, his expression gentling for a moment.

"I do care for you, Kaname," he replied wryly, his cheeks still hot. The hope that flooded Kaname's eyes almost made him wince.

"But I don't know what to think about this," he added, raking a hand through his hair. "I- I've never thought about you in _that_ way," he added rather dryly. Something seemed to flicker and die in Kaname's eyes.

"Never?" he murmured sadly. Zero shook his head resolutely, hating the fact that he was causing pain, hating the fact that he sounded like a real hypocrite after the things they had done to each other. Kaname opened and closed his mouth a couple of times. He took a deep breath and forced himself to continue.

"Do you think that - in time...?" he asked hopefully. Zero shook his head slowly, his eyes apologetic but decided. He did his best to tune out the voice that was loudly denouncing him as a liar. In the silence that followed, Kaname heaved a hopeless sigh and turned away.

"Perhaps it's too soon," he murmured sadly. Zero clenched his jaw, searching frantically in his mind for something to say, something that would make this situation less awkward… if it were at all possible.

"Perhaps it's because no one else has bitten me except for you," Kaname went on that same hopeless sounding voice, as if he were talking to himself. "Perhaps it's because you didn't take my blood to obtain my power but only to stabilise yourself. I grew to crave your bite, your fangs. I began to wonder what it would be like to have you love me the way you loved Yuuki."

_For so many years, I wondered until it was all I could think of. _

Kaname turned around slowly, his eyes hauntingly sad.

_Until you, Zero, were all I could think of._

"Has it never, ever crossed your mind before?" he asked wistfully. Zero opened his mouth to answer and changed his mind.

"This is why you never should have fed me after she died," he accused instead. "What we've been doing is wrong and you - you're her brother, for Pete's sake!"

The chocolate gaze turned surprisingly thoughtful. Appraising.

"Is that the only reason?" Kaname asked.

"Of course it is! Are you mad? We're brothers-in-law!" Zero exploded.

Kaname took a deep breath.

"And the fact that we're both males is - is all right with you?" he asked carefully. Zero blinked, taken aback. Wait - was he all right with that? He wasn't turning gay, was he? No. He was just confused as hell but he hadn't looked at anyone else or wanted anyone else except Yuuki, much less someone of the opposite sex. Zero's brow wrinkled. Then why did he enjoy kissing and pleasuring Kaname so much? That must mean something, he supposed uneasily. Either that or Kaname's physical beauty was just too appealing for anyone to resist. In any case, they were just giving comfort to one another. To want more, to even think of wanting more was still wrong!

"Did you know I stopped making love to Yuuki for the past six months?" he asked instead. "She was ill and I couldn't - it wasn't fair to make her-" he broke off abruptly, breathing hard. He wanted Kaname to know how much Yuuki meant to him even if he had force the words out past his embarrassment.

"There has never been anyone else _but_ her, Kaname. She was my first, you know that. We were each other's firsts. No one else!"

Zero swung around, trying to hide the fact that his face was on fire. Kaname stared at him, his throat swelling with both pain and pride. Zero hadn't needed to tell him that.

"I know," he replied, his voice quiet and sincere. "I've always known that."

Slowly, the silver head turned around. Zero's eyes were haunted with grief and pain.

"Then you know why I can't accept your..."

Oh God, what was he going to say? Offer? Proposal? Invitation? What the hell - it was just a confession!

"But you wouldn't be betraying Yuuki's memory, you know," Kaname persevered, a tiny flicker of hope still surviving in his crushed heart. "You've been loyal and faithful to her all these years and I know and respect that. That's why I... waited."

The sudden widening of Kaname's eyes and the look of dismay that crossed his face aroused Zero's suspicions once more, as did the way the pureblood quickly turned away. He hadn't meant to say that, Zero realised. Oh God. Did he really want to know anymore? He exhaled and realised he might as well since his world had already turned upside down.

"You waited? Since when?" he finally asked. An elegant shoulder lifted in an embarrassed shrug.

"Since _when_ have you waited, Kaname?" Zero asked again, his voice harder than before. Kaname glanced over his shoulder, the movement looking almost furtive.

"A couple of months after you two were married, actually," he whispered. He looked miserable as if he could already guess what Zero's reaction would be. As predicted, the hunter's mouth fell open.

_Dear God, that long ago?_

"You never said a word!" he accused. Kaname swung around to face him, his eyes blazing.

"How could I? You were already married to Yuuki! How could I say anything?"

If he had, he would have broken his sister's heart and Zero would have freaked out completely, since he did not know Kaname as well as he did now. Zero shook his head wordlessly, speechless. Wow. And he thought Kaname had turned his world upside down already.

"Anything for her," Kaname continued in a slightly softer voice. "The same thing you always believed in - _anything_ for Yuuki. For her and her alone. You of all people should understand this. I know you do."

"But all these years?" Zero found himself murmuring in a disbelieving tone. The depth of Kaname's patience and devotion absolutely floored him.

"How could you have stood it?" he found himself wondering. "It must have been -"

Hell. It must have been hell to put up a façade of a happy elder brother and favourite uncle for so many years, to pretend he had everything he wanted when it was his sister's husband he longed for. It must have been hell to visit her family and witness the happiness that wasn't his. It must have been hell to present tickets for the expensive holidays that he would never enjoy.

Kaname simply nodded, his arms going around himself in a purely defensive gesture. He had already said all there was to say. There were no more secrets to hide behind now. Zero could make him or break him, it was that simple. Kaname closed his eyes and prayed. He had to believe that he was still safe, he had to. He had to believe in this wonderful, wonderful person who had loved his sister unconditionally like no other. He had wanted Zero's love for his own so desperately he had been willing to wait. Willing to stand at the side of his sister's happy little world and bide his time as he watched her enjoy the love he craved for himself.

"Is it so very wrong to want what my sister had, now that she's no longer here to have it?" he asked, his voice shaking. Zero stared at him, his traitorous heart swayed by that haunting, unbearably sad tone in Kaname's beautiful voice.

"You'd - no, we'd still be betraying her memory," he said firmly even as the voice inside his mind shrieked at him. Kaname shook his head.

"Yuuki was never a selfish person," he whispered. "Zero, do you honestly feel that you do not deserve a second chance at happiness?"

"What makes you so sure that you can give me that?"

Kaname sighed, not in the least bit surprised at his beloved hunter's stubbornness.

"Because I love you. I would take care of you and love you and give you whatever it is you want. Please believe me, I mean what I say. Anything, Zero. I would give you anything. I know you..."

Zero's face burned Kaname's ardently voiced words. He scowled.

"What do you know of me?"

He regretted asking that when Kaname smiled at him, his eyes turning unbelievably tender.

"I know that you need to feel needed," he answered softly. "I know that you're truly happy only when you have someone to take care of."

It was only one of the many reasons that had made him fall for the hunter so many years ago.

"Please, Zero," Kaname whispered. "Now that Yuuki is no longer here, please let me be the lucky recipient of your love."

Zero's eyes filled with tears. The fact that Kaname dared to say that slammed home the fact that she was truly gone.

"I don't know," he said, his own voice starting to shake. "I miss her so much."

In a flash, Kaname had moved closed to him and wrapped Zero in his arms.

"I know," he murmured. "I miss her too."

Zero twisted aside, breaking Kaname's hold on him. He dashed a hand across wet but stormy amethyst eyes.

"Then you know why this will never work! Never speak of it to me again, Kaname – ever!"

Zero glared daggers at the stunned pureblood before he swung around and strode off, almost wrenching the door of the dining room off its hinges in his attempt to get away. Alone on the verandah, Kaname fought back hopeless tears and choked down the sobs that wanted to escape. He had carefully nurtured the flame inside of him for more than twenty years. He had come close to cracking, to giving up so many times but somehow, he had managed to survive.

And now that he had finally let go of his last secret, he wasn't going to give up. With Zero, it was always two steps forward and one step back but that still counted as progress, didn't it? Kaname firmly believed it did. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, palming away the streaks of moisture from his cheeks.

_No. I'm not going to give up. Not now._

- o -

Zero had his duffel bag open on the bed and was packing it frantically with no thoughts as to neatness or method. He simply pulled shirts, trousers and jeans from the closet and stuffed them inside the bag, thankful that he packed light. That was good, he thought distractedly. Less things to think of, to worry about, to wonder if he had left anything behind. Other than his sanity. And perhaps a part of himself he didn't want to think of.

Next was his stuff in the bathroom. Zero stuffed them into his toiletry bag and then crammed the bag into his duffel. The faster he packed, the faster he could leave. He needed to get away. One more minute of hearing Kaname's trembling voice and looking at that hauntingly beautiful face with those shimmering eyes and he would be kissing the pureblood again, desperate to erase every single bit of sadness he could find.

Zero yanked the zip of his bag closed and paused for a moment. Kaname had laid his soul bare, he knew that. He knew that, he told the incessantly growling voice inside his head. But it was a shock all the same. Surely he deserved a little space, a little time to himself to get over it? Zero didn't wait for the voice to answer. He crossed over to the door. He would get someone to take him down to the village. From there he would catch a bus or whatever transportation that was available until he reached Cross Academy.

And then what? demanded the voice. Zero didn't even flinch. Until I can think this through, all right? he answered it. There is nothing to think about, it came right back with. Zero ignored it. He yanked open the door and stopped short because Kaname was standing right there. The pureblood was standing right there and he hadn't even sensed his presence.

"Zero?" Kaname's voice was soft, hesitant. "May I come in? Please?"

Zero had to harden his heart.

"No. Don't, Kaname," he replied shortly. "You've said enough already."

He made as if to brush past him but Kaname blocked his way.

"Don't leave. Not like this," he begged breathlessly. "Just calm down. I know you're... surprised but I didn't expect you to - to come to a decision right away."

_I've waited for so many years. A couple more days, weeks, months - that's nothing!_

Zero glared at him.

"I've already made my decision," he said shortly. "Don't make it any harder for me."

The utter unfairness of his words got to Kaname. He took a few steps into the room, forcing Zero to move backwards. Kaname pushed the door shut with his foot and gave a small bitter laugh, unable to stop himself.

"Don't make it harder for you?" he repeated incredulously. "What are you saying, Zero? That it's been easy for me?"

When Zero only frowned at him, Kaname growled. In a split second, all the pent up feelings that he had kept suppressed for so many years bubbled up to the forefront of his mind, each one accompanied by a crystal clear image. A series of flashing snapshots made all the more tangible by the accompanying scents, tastes and emotions at that exact moment.

The giddy excitement that flooded him each time he set out to meet Zero, knowing that the hunter needed what only he could give.

The heart stopping anticipation that assailed him upon seeing those dear eyes red with need, those fangs sharpened with hunger, aching to plunge into his flesh.

The frantic beat of his heart deafening him as Zero pulled him close and tugged his collar to the side.

The delightful promise of a hasty tongue dragged across his sensitive skin before those fangs plunged in a bare second later.

The sheer ecstasy of being fed on as if he were the most delicious thing on earth.

And then the despair of knowing it was over before he wanted it to be, where he could do nothing but graciously receive his beloved's embarrassed thanks before being left alone to cope with nothing but those brief memories, a body that shook with longing and a handful of blood tablets to dull his own hunger.

Kaname just couldn't keep back his words any longer.

"How can you say that? Do you think it's been easy for me all these years?" he demanded raggedly. "To have you take from me and not be able to do anything about it? To feel you pressed close to me and to know that to hug you back would only freak you out? To know that confessing how I felt would mean never seeing you again? To feel you try to get away as soon as you could as if the very thought of being close to me disgusts you? To know that you'll go back to Yuuki after that and have someone care for you and that I'll be all alone?"

The outburst of angry words stunned them both. Kaname clapped a hand to his mouth, his eyes filled with pain. Oh God, he hadn't meant to say those things! The last thing he wanted was to make Zero guilty about something he had never wanted, something that brought nothing but pleasure to Kaname. In the tense silence that followed, Zero swallowed hard, guilt twining hot and sour through his heart, cemented by the naked pain blazing in Kaname's eyes and in the disturbed air around them.

"If that's all you want, then take my blood!" Zero finally shouted. "Take it! I'm giving it to you so that you'll know what it's like! That's what you want, isn't it?"

Kaname's mouth fell open in shock, anger fleeing in the wake of Zero's unexpected words. He shuddered with a mixture of longing and hurt. Yes, he wanted Zero's blood, he had craved it for years but to have it offered like - like this!

"No, Zero," he groaned and forced himself to turn around. "You don't know what you're asking! You'll create a bond between us, one that will only make you hate me more!"

Zero was too angry to care. He shrugged his shoulder impatiently, letting his bag fall to the carpet. Then he clamped his hand onto Kaname's shoulder and swung him around.

"Take it! Bite me – now!" he demanded, his eyes blazing angrily. "I owe you, I know it!"

Kaname squeezed his eyes shut, a small sob of despair escaping him. He shook his head without saying anything.

"Damnit!" Zero grabbed Kaname's shoulders and pulled him close. One hand went up behind the dark head, strong fingers spearing angrily through the silky locks. Without ceremony, Zero pushed Kaname's head into the crook of his neck, on the right side, jerking his head to the left at the same time. His heart had started pounding in remembered fear, suppressed for so many years but he fought it down. Kaname tried to pull his head back and found he couldn't - Zero's hand was immovable.

"Go on. Take as much as you want!" Zero said grimly, his body braced and tensed for the pain of the bite he knew would follow. He could both hear and feel the ragged breathing at the side of his neck and it made him both weak and angry. He had a debt of two plus decades to pay but never let it be said that Zero Kiryuu reneged on his debts!

"No, no..." Kaname struggled to get free before he gave in and did as Zero demanded. He shouldn't be this weak, he was a pureblood! But every time he found himself in Zero's arms, he found himself weaker than a baby.

"Don't, Zero, please don't. Please don't force me," he pleaded brokenly. Zero didn't react immediately and Kaname started sniffling. He was so torn he couldn't stop himself. Was Zero this angry with him that he wanted to punish him like this? Did he hate him this much?

Kaname slumped against Zero, no longer interested in the opportunity to taste his hunter's blood. Denial and self control weren't easy but Kaname had practiced both for more than twenty years. He could live forever without tasting Zero's blood if he had his love in exchange.

Zero's eyes closed and he swallowed, his breathing turning ragged. Kaname always did this to him. Always! Each time Zero got angry and lashed out at him, Kaname would pull his vulnerable act and it was so perfect that Zero would just cave in. It never failed. It certainly didn't fail now. And it won't ever fail, so just give it up already! cried the voice right on cue.

Zero shook his head in defeat. Was that voice right after all? It just wasn't worth getting angry over, was it? He would end up feeling wretched and apologise to Kaname who would smile at him and they would both be right back where they started. Honestly, chided the voice. Are you going to do this forever? Wouldn't it be easier to just say... yes? Zero sighed and dipped his head.

"I won't," he said quietly, his fingers gentling in Kaname's hair. "I won't, Kaname. I'm sorry, that was wrong of me. I know you never -"

Yup. He definitely felt wretched and he had just apologised. Right on cue. Kaname gave a gasp and then he started crying in earnest. Zero resisted the urge to roll his eyes but he did give in to another urge. He wrapped his arms around Kaname and held him close. Honestly, it was very difficult trying to stay angry with a tearful, clingy pureblood. But why should someone who had the world at his feet choose someone like him?

With a sigh, Zero realised that he now knew why. Finally knew why. He moved backwards, pulling Kaname with him until he was sitting at the edge of the bed with the distressed pureblood on his lap. No more words were said but that was fine with them. Both had already said too much.

Zero eventually shifted, his shoulders growing stiff and his back starting to ache. Kaname was quiet now with only the occasional sniffle to break the silence between them.

"Are you all right?" Zero asked softly. Kaname nodded, his head still down. Zero shifted him off his lap onto the bed and flopped backwards, groaning with relief as he stretched out on the bed, rolling his shoulders to work out the kinks. Kaname lay down as well, turning to his side so that he could rest his head on Zero's shoulder.

"Are you still going to leave?" he asked softly and lifted his head to look at Zero. The latter sighed, his lips tilting in a rueful smile. Kaname's eyes were red and swollen but he still looked beautiful. Zero reached up and tapped the pureblood's nose lightly with a finger.

"I need some time to think about this," he replied quietly. Kaname hesitated and then he nodded.

"All right. I'll get Akira to take you back," he offered. Zero nodded cautiously. Was Kaname really going to let him go? Just like this?

"How long do you need, Zero?" Kaname asked, still in that subdued voice. Zero sat up and ran a hand through his hair.

"A month?" he asked wryly, not surprised when the chocolate eyes widened in distress.

"A _month?_" he echoed. Zero raised an eyebrow at him.

"How long were you doing to give me?" he asked. Kaname offered him a winning smile.

"Two days?" he replied. Zero chuckled and reached out to chuck the pureblood under the chin.

"Every time I give you an inch..." he started. Kaname raised his hand and held Zero's hand in his, the twinkle in his eyes instantly fading.

"I take whatever I can get. I love you, Zero," he said solemnly. He shook his head slightly. "You don't know how long I've wanted to say that."

Zero sighed, his other hand going up to cup Kaname's flushed cheek.

"I have a pretty good guess," he replied. "How could you -"

He broke off and shook his head. Before he could talk himself into doing something that would confuse him even more, he swung his legs off the bed.

"I think I should leave now," he muttered. Kaname bit his lip, his heart heavy and aching. He never wanted Zero to leave but it was only right to give him some time to himself. He had waited this long, hadn't he? Zero was still talking to him, Zero could still smile at him... Kaname got off the bed gracefully, his back straight.

"I'll go call Akira now," he said and left. Zero stood there, wondering if he was making the right decision. Despite his duffel bag still lying on the carpet near the door, he didn't want to leave. He grabbed its handles and tossed it onto the bed before sitting down beside it. Two minutes later, Kaname came back to his room. He was holding an envelope in his hand.

"Akira just arrived to deliver some reports from the office," he said quietly. "He's outside now, waiting to take you back to Cross Academy."

Zero nodded and stood up. He lifted his bag onto his shoulder and walked towards the door. It was time to go, but Kaname was standing there and looking at him with so much hope and love that Zero didn't need the voice to tell him what to do. He cursed and let his bag drop onto the carpet for the second time. In a flash, Kaname was wrapping his arms around him and offering him his mouth without reservation. The kiss was sweet and scorching and desperate. It tasted of goodbye and thank you and I'm sorry and I'll let you know and I'll be waiting. When it ended, there was nothing left to say.

"Wow, some kiss," Zero managed at last, his voice shaky. Kaname willed his none too steady legs to hold him up. He should have asked Akira to have a cup of coffee so that he could have Zero all to himself for half an hour more. But that would only delay the inevitable, wouldn't it?

"Just a little something to remember me by," he whispered impishly. Zero smiled at that. He gave Kaname a gentle kiss on the cheek.

"As if I could forget you," he muttered. Before Kaname could say anything, Zero released him and took a step back. He grabbed his bag and went out of the room, his fast footsteps leading to the stairs and going down.

Kaname closed his eyes, his lips still tingling from their kiss.

_I'll be counting the days, Zero. _

- Chapter End -


	25. Chapter 25: The Decision

**Author Notes:** Hello, everyone and thank you once again for your lovely, lovely reviews for the previous chapter! This chapter was a challenge to write and I ended up tearing my hair out and rewriting it a number of times. Even so, my apologies for it being short and boring. I promise there will be more action in the next chapter. In the meantime, enjoy if you can *hopeful smile*

- Chapter Start -

Akira was respectfully silent throughout the five hour journey, speaking only to remind Zero to let him know if he wanted to stop to stretch his legs or get a drink. The older man hadn't missed seeing the unhappiness in Zero's eyes anymore than he had missed sensing the same emotions leaking from Kaname earlier but it wasn't his place to say or do anything, no matter how fond he was of both of them.

Zero told Akira as politely as he could that he was fine and just wanted to get back to Cross Academy as soon as possible. Right now, it was the only place that felt both familiar and safe to him. A place where he knew surprises wouldn't be lurking around in corners, waiting to jump out and strangle him with shock and guilt. After catching a couple of concerned glances Akira sent his way via the rearview mirror, Zero closed his eyes and feigned sleep for the rest of the ride.

Unfortunately, he couldn't control his thoughts from tumbling chaotically inside his mind. By the time Akira drove past the Cross Academy front gates, it was almost three in the morning and Zero's nerves were frayed. He quickly got out of the car and took his duffel bag from Akira who looked reluctant to hand it over. On the one hand, Zero was tempted to ask the man to stay for a while but on the other, he was afraid. Afraid that if he did, he would end up burdening the kindly man with his morose company or worse, with his problems. It would be unfair to Akira and unfair as well as extremely disloyal to Kaname. As the older man's employer, Kaname Kuran did not deserve such inconsideration; it would not only betray his trust but also destroy his image no matter how loyal an employee Akira was.

_Oh, God. I'm _still_ thinking of Kaname...!_

The dratted pureblood hadn't left his head for a single moment. Zero exhaled out a tired sigh as he closed his front door. He dropped his bag onto the floor, leaned against the door and closed his eyes. Taking a deep breath, he filled his lungs with the familiar scent of his home, hoping it would ground him. His supposedly relaxing vacation had been nothing but one surprise after another, one revelation following another. Every little thing he had learned about his pureblood brother-in-law had just built and built until a shattering picture of Kaname Kuran was formed, one that Zero Kiryuu had never before imagined.

That fact that Kaname loved - no, was _'in love'_ with him - was just the icing on the cake. Yes, it was true. Kaname Kuran was in love with Zero Kiryuu and – surprise, surprise! - had been so for the past twenty over years. Just a handful of words that conveyed a veritable mountain of incredulousness and implications. Certainly enough to make Zero hot and cold all over just trying to wrap his mind around it. How was it possible, even with all the reasons Kaname had stated? It wasn't!

So Zero was an exemplary husband, a great father, a vampire hunter with a conscience and an all around good guy with the best principles one could ever hope to hold. But so what? There were a million other people who fitted that description. Or at least, Zero was pretty sure he wasn't the only one. He didn't know what the hell was so special about himself that he alone had managed the unattainable and earned Kaname's love, without even knowing he had. He didn't know what was so unique about himself that Kaname was positive couldn't be found elsewhere and hence, hadn't bothered to even look.

Not that Zero wanted him to start now. And that only compounded the problem, didn't it? Zero was astute enough to realise that other than holding deep affection and respect for Kaname; he had also come to feel somewhat possessive of the pureblood. He definitely didn't want Kaname to start 'looking around' for other options now. It was all his fault, of course. If Kaname had just continued to keep his feelings to himself, everything would still be fine and Zero wouldn't be second guessing every single decision he made, every step he took. But now that he knew - what then?

Zero took another deep breath and let it out on a long sigh. Feeling strangely lost, he finally pushed off from the door only to wander over to the sofa and sit down on it, staring blankly at the TV. The school grounds outside were as quiet as his home. Although the Night Class lessons were in session, their classrooms were some distance away. All Zero could hear now was the somewhat eerie silence that pervaded his home and pressed down on him from all sides. Because no one else was at home. Yuuki was gone and their children were away.

_Yuuki..._

Zero's eyes widened. He had been home for at least an hour now and he hadn't once thought of her! Hurriedly, he jumped up and made his way past the dining room and the corridor leading to their bedroom. Throwing open the door, he looked around as if seeing the familiar room for the first time. After taking a deep, fortifying breath, he strode over to Yuuki's wardrobe and pulled open the doors. The sight of her clothes and the sweet scent that clung to them had been more than enough to make him break down in the past. Now, Zero found himself staring somewhat blankly at the dearly familiar attire. He was relieved to find his eyes growing moist and his heart hurting with that familiar, bittersweet longing... but he was otherwise shocked that he could still stand up straight without collapsing on the floor, overcome with grief.

The knowledge left Zero stunned and uneasy. Slowly, he closed the wardrobe doors and pressed the palm of one hand on the smooth wood. He then bent his head until his forehead rested on the door. Two days. He had been away for only two days but something had changed irrevocably. No, not changed exactly... but something was now missing.

It was a few minutes before Zero could put his finger on it. The sharp edge of his loss, his grief - it was gone. _Gone_, just like that. Shocked, Zero took a step backwards and ended up sitting at the foot of the large double bed he had shared with Yuuki. He dropped his head into his hands with a soft moan, despair washing over him. It was happening. It really was happening - he was starting to forget his beloved Yuuki and only after a few short months! He sat there, shocked and betrayed by his own feelings. He should be grieving for Yuuki still. He should be grieving for years to come! He should be prepared to spend the rest of his life alone, content with the company of his children and perhaps grandchildren, counting the days until he could finally be reunited with her again. Wasn't that how life was supposed to be like, after the 'happily ever after' had ended? Wasn't that the right thing to do?

Because if it was, then Zero hadn't gone down that route at all. He pressed his lips together, trying to tune out the voice that had started jabbering inside his head again, like a radio that just wouldn't shut up. He had made a one hundred and eighty degree turn. He had started to enjoy life and a certain someone's company. He had found pleasure in being with Kaname and biting him. Unfortunately, it had opened up a veritable Pandora's box. Kaname craved not only his bite, but his love as well.

How on earth had something so innocent morphed into this? Zero had been all right with giving Kaname what he wanted when he justified it as mutual trust, mutual comfort. He just hadn't expected it to affect the deep love he felt for Yuuki. They were supposed to be completely separate. One was physical and sensual, stemming from their vampire natures and the power of blood sharing. The other was pure and unconditional, stemming from vows to protect and cherish and a love that was as deep as it was abiding. Neither was supposed to affect the other but somehow, it had happened. Zero didn't know why. He trusted and respected Kaname, he cared about him deeply. He found the pureblood extremely attractive and sensual and enjoyed pleasuring the hell out of him... but it wasn't love. Or it wasn't supposed to be _that sort_ of love. It wasn't supposed to affect Zero's devotion to Yuuki. Both were supposed to stay distinct and completely separate so that - so that...

So that Zero could continue to enjoy what he was doing with Kaname without feeling guilty about it, without feeling as if he was giving something more than affection, without feeling as if it was wrong. Because honestly, it didn't feel at all wrong to him. Finally! exclaimed the voice, sounding as if it had thrown up its hands. Zero sighed and pressed his lips together, convinced that it would not leave him alone until it had driven him crazy. Well? it asked impatiently, ignoring his less than complimentary thoughts. You're finally going down the right track. Kaname doesn't think it wrong so why on earth should you?

Zero groaned. Then he leapt to his feet and went back to the living room where he started pacing up and down. The voice continued to jabber at him while pushing images at him, images Zero didn't want to look at. He found himself staring at them anyway.

The soft yearning in those wide chocolate eyes as Kaname requested to be bitten.

The set features of that pale perfect face as Kaname steeled himself to confess to a love he had kept secret for more than twenty years.

The haunting sadness that clouded his entire being as Kaname sought to digest Zero's negative reaction without breaking apart.

Zero clenched his hands into fists. Could this be wrong? This thinking of Kaname and wanting to soothe his hurt and wanting to please him and be with him? Was it wrong of Kaname to love him and want his love in return? Was this something that would make Zero burn in hell if he chose to accept it?

There was only one way to find out and Zero was terrified. He knew that he cared for Kaname. He found the pureblood articulate and compelling, honest and caring, attractive and sensual, vulnerable and enchanting and just... just perfect. But it didn't mean he was in love with Kaname! He was just... well, just attracted to him, that was all. Knowing that a gorgeous, charismatic pureblood was head over heels in love with you, adored your bite and took your word for law was an immensely flattering prospect. Zero just refused to let it go to his head.

Besides, the next steps which pointed to increased intimacy and eventual consummation of a physical kind only filled him with trepidation. He squirmed uncomfortably at the thought, steadfastly ignoring the decidedly evil snicker echoing inside his head. So far, he had been the one in control of their intimate moments, except for that one astounding toe curling session where Kaname had taken things into his own hand. Or mouth as it were. Zero flushed.

But what if they did take it a step further? What then? Zero knew the basic mechanics of physical intimacy between two men. He had been uncomfortably aware of it ever since he found out his late sensei and adopted father were lovers so many years ago. But that was it - he certainly had never thought further along the lines.

But now that he did, it brought up another problem. Kaname might behave very submissively to him all this while but it didn't change the fact that he was a pureblood. A pureblood male did _not_ give himself to his partner, regardless of the dynamics of that relationship. That was not how things worked, at least for them. Zero had a pretty clear idea of the power play between the different classes of vampires. A pureblood sat at the very top while a Level D was at the bottom. It didn't matter that Zero was a man and a father of three. It didn't matter that Kaname held him in high regard, took his word over his own sister's, poured him tea whenever he came to visit and adored holding his hand. Zero's place was still at the bottom of the pyramid and that was that. If he decided to carry on seeing Kaname again, if he decided to see where this whole crazy, upside down deal was going to take them both, then he was going to have to submit. Try as he might, Zero just could not feel comfortable about that. He couldn't even picture it.

He loved Yuuki! He still did... but he now had feelings for Kaname as well.

_Oh God, was this what married people felt when they cheated on their spouses? _

Well, OK, that was a tad dramatic. Zero grimaced. It didn't apply to him. Yuuki was no longer around and when she was alive, he had never even thought about _thinking_ of cheating on her - it was something so alien to him, it just didn't apply. And yet, the feelings of guilt remained. Zero was pragmatic enough to realise by now that a good part of it was self imposed. It just seemed too... well, too _soon_ to want someone else or to care for someone else. If it had happened to anyone he knew, he would probably think them shallow and insincere. So what did that make him then?

_A complete hypocrite, that's what._

Fine. So what do you think is an acceptable time frame then? asked the voice dryly. Two months? Two years? Two decades, maybe? Do you really think it would make any difference? Do you want to go tell Kaname to wait two more years so that you would feel less guilty about it? Zero flinched at the very thought. No, of course he wouldn't do that to Kaname.

But this was a whole new world! It would mean having someone in his life again. It would mean changing his life around! Kaname wasn't like Yuuki, content to devote her life to her family while harbouring an ambition no higher than running a school. Kaname Kuran was a pureblood and a business tycoon. Someone who helmed a conglomerate with subsidiaries all over the world, someone who dealt with vampire politics and business dealings everyday. Someone who flew from one end of the world to the other just to close a business deal. Someone who juggled blood cocktails and power plays with other purebloods and nobles. Someone who should by all rights be completely out of Zero's league.

And is that really all Kaname is to you? prompted the voice, sounding as if its patience were wearing thin. Zero sighed heavily, rubbing his hands over his face.

No. Of course not. Kaname was... well, he was also someone who - more than anyone else - needed something normal in his life. He craved something or someone that was constant. Zero bit his lower lip, automatically warming to the thought. Put simply, Kaname needed someone by his side, someone to come home to, someone with whom he could be himself. But that just made Zero think of a typical housewife, someone stripped of her identity and independence, her life and happiness bound to someone else's whims and wishes.

No. Really? the voice was being very sarcastic this time. Do you think Yuuki ever felt that way after she married you? Did you ever feel that way when you took care of her and your children? it challenged him.

Zero's frown deepened. No. He loved them and took care of them happily and without regrets. He had never felt chained or burdened by his responsibilities but this was different.

Why should it be different? demanded the voice. It's not as if Kaname would forbid you from doing the things you loved, it added.

But how could a hunter and a pureblood live together? Zero argued back. It was impossible! And still confusing as hell.

Says you, huffed the voice sounding as if it had crossed its arms and was glaring at the ceiling. All cut and dried and here you are, denying everything that's in front of your nose.

Zero ignored it and went to take a shower. He had thought enough for one day.

Try a lifetime, back came the snarky answer almost immediately.

- o -

_Two days later..._

Zero was again sitting on the couch in front of the TV. He wasn't going to need a month to come to a decision after all. Two days were enough, exactly as Kaname had predicted. Still, Zero decided he wasn't going to contact Kaname until a complete month had passed. He had pride too. And a stupid voice in his head that simply refused to let up.

Zero hung his head and started thinking about all the things Kaname had said, about how Zero's love for Yuuki was exemplary and how he had admired and craved it. Zero sat there for hours, mentally going through Kaname's behaviour over the past few months and comparing it to how the pureblood had behaved for the past twenty over years. He finally came to the conclusion that Kaname hadn't really changed, merely allowed his inner feelings to show. The one who had changed most was Zero himself. Even sleeping in the same bed that he had shared with Yuuki ever since they were married felt different... as if he was no longer the same person he used to be a mere handful of months ago.

- o -

_Another two days later..._

Zero had thrown himself back into work. He accepted whatever work assignments given to him by the Hunters' Association, whether by himself or with some of the rookie hunters. When he was back at Cross Academy, he spent hours working out in the school gym late at night, choosing to exhaust himself physically. The one thing that he couldn't change was his constant thinking of Kaname. Zero hadn't stopped thinking of Kaname ever since he walked out of the villa and into the waiting limousine that day. It got to the point where he became easily aroused if he happened to be thinking of Kaname while in the shower. The memories came unbidden and so easily to him then, especially how Kaname had looked like and sounded in the throes of ecstasy. Each time it happened, Zero bit his lip and stared straight at the wall in front of him. Shifting his legs apart, he gripped himself with a soapy hand and started stroking, focusing on how good it felt. Yes... but not as good as he knew it would feel if it were Kaname's hand wrapped around him. Or - or Kaname's... body... instead of just his hand. Or even his mouth.

Zero inhaled sharply, cheeks stained a bright pink at the vivid images that thought brought him. When a snicker of delight echoed inside his mind, he cursed under his breath. Then he wondered what it would feel like to be claimed by a male. It made him feel cold and uncomfortable, his erection softening in his fist. Zero scowled down at it. Then he started wondering how it would feel if it were the other way around. If Kaname were lying beneath him with those pale slender legs parted wide and lifted to welcome him in, those perfect lips emitting soft cries of delight, head thrown back to expose that long, graceful neck. Zero shuddered as a different set of feelings coursed through him. He was rock hard and throbbing once more. With another fervent curse, he stroked himself hard. It didn't take long for him to peak and violently at that.

- o -

The following day found Zero in his kitchen, adding a dash of salt to the pot on the stove. He swirled the golden liquid a couple of times with the ladle and tasted it. A perfect tomato soup, rich and tangy. Zero's smile turned wistful as he switched off the burner. He was willing to bet that even his late sensei couldn't have found fault with his signature soup. That reminded him yet again that both Yagari and his late father had been lovers. The thought had initially filled Zero with unease and disgust so many years ago but the knowledge that he himself might very well be embarking on the same sort of relationship left him embarrassed and chagrined.

Poetic justice was what Yuuki would have said. A tender smile curved Zero's lips and he put down the ladle with a soft sigh. His children were going to arrive for dinner in fifteen minutes. Everything was already ready. All he needed was a shower and fifteen minutes was plenty of time for that. He seemed to have plenty of time on his hands now. He had spent a great deal of that time brooding and arguing with himself as well as that dratted voice inside his head. A three way conversation of sorts. Centered on Kaname Kuran and his brother-in-law's impending loss of independence - what else?

He was a mental case, Zero decided with a groan. Shaking his head at himself, he walked out of the kitchen and headed towards the bathroom, wondering if Kaname spent half as much time thinking of him. Somehow, he already knew the answer to that.

- o -

The dinner went well. Zero was as pleased to see his children again as they were of him but he saw them with new eyes now and realised something else. They were no longer children. They were adults now, with their own dreams and hopes and lives to live out with someone other than their grieving father by their sides. Zero saw it in the loving way Tomi gazed at Yuko, and in the intent way his sons listened to their respective girlfriends' chatter. The signs were unmistakable. If Yuuki were still here now, Zero would have exchanged an amused look with her but now, there was only a bittersweet pang in his chest. Their children had all grown up... and left him behind.

During dessert, Yuko cleared her throat to get everyone's attention. Linking hands with a beaming Tomi beside her, she revealed to her father and brothers that she was just two months' pregnant. Amidst the surprised but boisterous cheers from Ichiru and Isamu, Zero swallowed the lump in his throat. He got up and went over to Yuko, pressing a soft kiss to her silvery hair, almost choked with sudden emotion. Yuuki - she should have been here to partake in the joy. She should have been here for Yuko to have someone to love her and guide her, someone to share pregnancy secrets and giggles and fears with. Zero struggled to hold back his tears. When Yuko saw his grief, she squeezed his hand hard, smiling through her own tears.

"I'm sure Mama knows, Papa," she whispered. Zero nodded, again fighting down the ball of emotion lodged in his throat. With an effort, he calmed himself and congratulated them both, offering the requisite you'd-better-take-good-care-of-my-baby-girl-or-else speech to Tomi before going back to his seat. No sooner had Zero sat down in his seat when Ichiru cleared his throat and offered a surprise of his own. He smiled at Hinata, his girlfriend of three years, before announcing to everyone that she had agreed to marry him just two days ago. More laughter and cheers followed his words. With a radiant smile, Hinata held up her hand and showed off the beautiful silver and emerald ring on her slim finger. Yuko was the first one to react, laughing and teasing her brother about how he had finally grown up before getting up to kiss him on the cheek.

Zero congratulated them both but he was the only one who didn't laugh. It wasn't that he didn't like Hinata, she was a lovely girl and a vampire as well. It was just that... no. He firmly pushed his feelings to the back of his mind but they surfaced again after dinner had been cleared away. Zero had made tea for everyone and when he carried the tray out to the living room, he found himself staring at his family. He was standing in his own home, in the house he had lived in for the past thirty something years. And yet, he had never felt more lost.

The twins left after dinner while Tomi and Yuko left the following day. Zero was too restless to sleep despite a punishing routine in the gym earlier. He found himself in his living room instead, staring at the blank TV screen long after the stations had stopped transmission. Once again, the quietness of his home pressed against his senses. How strange it seemed. Had it always been this silent? No, of course it hadn't. This home had known noise. A lot of it. Chatter and laughter, shouts and screams, pattering of feet and clapping of hands. The clattering of dishes, the quarreling over the TV remote. A family had lived and loved and grown up here. Three generations of it. But all that was left now was silence.

Zero closed his eyes and bowed to the inevitable at last. For the past few days, he had barked at his colleague and rookie hunters until someone suggested - with a falsely cheery smile - that perhaps he was due for some time off. Faced with that wordless hint, Zero dutifully applied for two days off that very day and wasn't surprised when it was granted even before he had finished filling in the form.

So here he was with one more day off and his family had already left after their visit. Zero gritted his teeth and went to change before hitting the gym. Again. He used the free weights and did multiple push ups and rope skipping, pushing his stamina to the limit, pushing away the task he needed to do. He knew what he should do, he just didn't want to do it immediately. Chalk it up to male pride or hunter pride or something just as silly because Zero actually missed Kaname. He missed Kaname so damned much. He wanted to see him again and he wasn't going to say no if the first thing Kaname asked for was to be bitten. Hell, he was going to kiss Kaname _and_ bite him _and_ give him a spectacular release whether the pureblood wanted it or not.

So what the hell are you waiting for then? asked the permanent resident inside his head. Zero groaned and stopped, letting the skipping rope fall to the floor. He ran a hand down his face, breathing hard. All right. He had made up his mind and he wasn't going to dwell on it. Enough dawdling already. He was going to shower and then he was going to drive into the city where Kuran Corp was.

- o -

Kaname's offices were certainly impressive. A tall building that was all glass and chrome and environmentally friendly features complete with wide open spaces and glass walls - expertly tinted to let in the illusion of light without stressing sensitive vampire eyes. Beautiful potted plants stood in corners and perfect tiny gardens peeped out from every space imaginable. Zero looked around him curiously, a little abashed to realised he had never visited Kaname's offices before. Well, understandable really since all the employees were vampires and most of them weren't supposed know they were brothers-in-law. Zero hesitated before heading towards the imposing reception counter. The two beautiful receptionists manning the desk were vampires, of course. Friendly and expertly groomed but vampires all the same. Only a brief flicker in their eyes betrayed the fact that the silver haired male in front of them was actually a vampire hunter.

Kaname's personal offices were on the top floor - the thirtieth - but of course, one needed the appropriate passes and rock solid appointments to make it up there. Having neither, Zero just squared his shoulders and hoped for the best. His initial enthusiasm for coming here was eroding fast.

- o -

The third project meeting of the day had ended three minutes ago and all the participants had left Kaname's office. As soon as the door closed behind Seiren, Kaname dropped his mask of calm composure. It was already so brittle and thin, he was sure she had seen right through it. Letting his shoulders slump forward, he rested his elbows on the table and dropped his head into his hands.

He was tired. So tired, bone achingly so. He hadn't slept or eaten much in the past week. A very faint smile touched Kaname's perfectly shaped lips. Were it not for Seiren's vigilance, he suspected he might have eaten even less. It wasn't a wise decision for his normally sharp mental acuities now felt dull and slow, his pureblood senses foggy and faulty. Had he been waiting for Zero's reply for only a week? If he was this pathetic after such a short duration, then how had he survived twenty over years without anyone being the wiser?

Kaname's lips twitched in another faint smile. It was because ignorance was bliss. He had survived then because he hadn't known the ecstasy of Zero's kisses and caresses. For so many years, he had gone on without placing a foot at Heaven's door... without peeping inside... without knowing the sheer heart stopping bliss that awaited him.

But now he had and God, it was _torture_, knowing where Zero was, knowing he only had to say a word to Akira to find himself deposited at his beloved's front door.

Kaname exhaled out a sigh that quivered with tell tale exhaustion. He should have insisted on giving Zero only two days to think this through. But more importantly, he couldn't go on like this. He should pull himself together. He should eat more, rest more. But he just didn't feel like it. Kaname had even asked the Hunter Association to stop keeping him informed on the outcome of Zero's hunter missions. He had a couple of trusted contacts there who knew that Zero was his brother-in-law and hence, believed his words that he wanted to be assured of his relative's safety. But now, Kaname told them he was reassured enough of Zero's skill to not need their updates any longer. It wasn't that he didn't care but because he wanted more.

Now that he knew what was at stake, now that he had had a taste of it, Kaname wanted more than Zero to just respect him. He wanted Zero to love him and trust him as well. That meant no more spying on his missions, regardless of how noble his intentions were. Kaname knew that Zero had gone back to work but he stuck to his decision, suffering from possibly the worst withdrawal symptoms ever for one Zero Kiryuu, the most stubborn and wonderful vampire hunter he had ever known.

Kaname uttered a soft, despairing chuckle, his head still hidden in his hands. He slid his fingers into his long dark hair and knotted them tightly in the silky strands. Could he last another three weeks like this?

Before Kaname could answer himself, he heard Seiren's muffled but familiar footsteps approach his door. He lifted his head immediately, fingers automatically gentling and combing through his tangled hair. Taking a deep breath, he squared his shoulders and smoothed out all signs of stress from his face. Every single action happened almost simultaneously, taking only a couple of seconds to complete. When the door opened, Kaname was already looking up enquiringly, hands resting easily on the table. He looked as composed as before.

"Kaname-sama, the revised agreements," Seiren murmured as she approached the desk and placed the documents in front of Kaname. He flipped through the pages marked with tags as Seiren ran through the summary status of all the projects they were currently handling. This short update was a weekly ritual for them every Friday night, and Seiren took pride in ensuring the figures were always up-to-date and accurate. Kaname had secretaries and assistants who could assist him in this just as ably but somehow, the task had fallen to Seiren since the beginning and neither she nor Kaname minded. Her final task of the day was to bring him any agreements or documents that needed his signature.

Ten minutes later, everything was completed for the week. Seiren gathered the documents into a neat pile with her usual economical, efficient movements. Kaname reached for the gold cap of his fountain pen, that all encompassing tiredness enveloping him again. A dull headache had started up in his temple, threatening to become a full blown one if he didn't rest. Try as he might, Kaname just couldn't summon up the energy needed for the rest of his day.

"One more thing, Kaname-sama. Kiryuu-san came by earlier," Seiren stated, a very rare ghost of a smile hovering on her lips.

Kaname's eyes blinked. And then widened. He dropped the pen onto the desk and stood up before he even realised he had.

"Zero? When? Why? Is anything wrong?"

Kaname automatically reached for his hand phone and scanned the screen even though he knew there were no missed calls or messages.

"He didn't say, Kaname-sama."

When did he arrive?"

"About an hour ago. You were still meeting with the lawyers then."

"Well, why didn't you show – I know, he didn't have an appointment. But in future, Seiren, if he –"

With an effort, Kaname stopped his inane babbling. Common sense told him that if Seiren had been the one to see Zero in person, she would have informed him immediately. Since she hadn't, it was safe to assume that the hunter hadn't run into her.

"Is he still here?"

"No, he left fifteen minutes ago."

Kaname sank back onto his chair, not bothering to hide the acute disappointment he felt.

"I'm sorry -" Seiren was quick to offer her apologies all the same. Kaname held up a hand and shook his head.

"It's all right, Seiren. You have nothing to apologise for."

Seiren bowed her head and waited silently. Kaname sat still, worry and elation singing in equal measure through his veins. Zero had come to see him! After only a week! This surely was the sign he had been waiting for! His wish had come true and Kaname felt a surge of much needed energy wash through his tired body, leaving him alert, energetic and most of all, deliriously happy.

Zero wanted to see him and hadn't made him wait a whole month! Only a week!

Kaname could have sung and danced for joy. He restrained himself with an effort. A brief glance at Seiren showed her with her head still bowed. Kaname felt some of his elation leave him. She had either turned into stone... or was trying to hide a smile at his odd behaviour. Both outcomes were equally unlikely so Kaname suspected it could only be the latter. He sighed soundlessly, knowing he had given himself away. Again.

"How many meetings do I have left today, Seiren?"

When Seiren looked up, her face wore its usual calm demeanour. If she was surprised at Kaname's forgetfulness, she didn't let it show.

"Three more. The next one starts in five minutes."

Kaname closed his eyes, a more audible sigh leaving his lips. More of his elation seeped away.

"I can reschedule the other two meetings if you like, Kaname-sama. You should be able to leave the office two hours earlier."

Kaname's eyes snapped open and he looked up sharply, torn between gratitude and chagrin. There was that almost smile from Seiren, the one that barely lifted her lips. Kaname gave up and smiled ruefully.

"Thank you, Seiren," he replied warmly. She gave another bow and picked up the documents.

"I will inform Akira to be ready with the car in one hour's time, to take you to Cross Academy," she murmured with just the barest twinkle in her pale violet eyes. Kaname waited until the door closed behind her before shaking his head ruefully at himself. Seiren was worth her weight in gold.

- o -

Zero was lying in bed, resting while his dinner simmered on the stove. His eyes snapped open when the doorbell chimed. When the wonderfully familiar presence brushed over his senses, goose bumps broke over his skin and his heartbeat accelerated. Kaname had found out he had gone to his office and now, here he was.

Zero was already hurrying barefoot down the corridor before he realised he had gotten out of bed. Then he was at the front door, twisting the lock and pulling open the door. Kaname stood there, dressed as if he had come straight from the office in a perfectly tailored suit. Despite the air of exhaustion that clung to him, his eyes glowed feverishly and the smile on his face was radiant.

"Kaname," Zero murmured, his eyes drinking in the pureblood and his mouth almost watering at the sight and scent of him. Oh God, he had _missed_ Kaname even more than he thought he had!

"Come in," he invited huskily and stepped back. When Kaname stepped inside, Zero noticed Akira standing by the limousine and lifted a hand in greeting. The jovial man smiled widely at him and bowed before getting into the car and driving away. Taking the hint, Zero closed the door and turned around. The first half minute was spent just staring at each other, feeling as awkward as two teenagers meeting on their first date. Ridiculous, considering the things they had already indulged in.

"Zero." Kaname was staring at him as if he hadn't seen him in years. It had only been a week. The longest week of Zero's life.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. Kaname smiled.

"You visited my office today," he said simply as if that explained everything. Zero looked down, his cheeks flushing.

"Yeah, well," he mumbled and shrugged.

"Why?" Kaname asked softly. Zero shrugged again. Kaname sighed and sniffed the air delicately.

"Are you cooking something, Zero?" he asked, still in that polite tone. They might have been newly introduced instead of almost lovers. Zero nodded.

"Soup. For noodles. Do you want some?" he asked. Kaname smiled again.

"It smells delicious. But not now, perhaps later," he answered, sounding almost dismissive. "Why did you come to see me, Zero?"

Zero swallowed, uncomfortably aware that Kaname would simply go on asking until he caved in.

"I don't know," Zero mumbled and could have smacked himself as the voice woke up and rolled its eyes at him. Loudly. If such a thing were possible.

"Why are you here then?" he countered and winced. It was he who had gone to see Kaname in the first place.

"Because you came to see me and I wanted to know why," Kaname replied, his tone just a tad breathless. "It's only been – "

"A week. I know," Zero mumbled, flushing in chagrin. "I uh, just wanted to see if you were all right."

The wide chocolate eyes blinked in surprise. A small smile hovered on Kaname's perfect lips but he held himself very still.

"Is that the only reason, Zero?" he asked softly. "Why you came to see me?"

Zero stared at him, his heart starting to accelerate again. Of course it wasn't! But did he dare to name the other reasons?

Kaname stared back at him, painfully aware that Zero was once again teetering on the brink of a decision, one that would definitely affect him for better or for worse. He held his breath and prayed silently in his heart.

_Don't say yes, Zero. Don't you dare say yes to my face..._

- Chapter End -


	26. Chapter 26: The Assurance

**Author Notes:** Hello again! Thank you once more for your wonderful reviews for the previous chapter. As promised, here is the next chapter and earlier than usual too. Enjoy! :D

- Chapter Start -

Zero stared at Kaname as silence swelled between them. Anyone looking on would inevitably think him the dominant party given Kaname's adorable clinginess and open vulnerability, but Zero knew better. He was nothing short of complete putty in Kaname's elegant hands. Even now, he was captivated by the pureblood's trepidation displayed so obviously in those soulful eyes, in the tense set of those slender shoulders, in the absolute stillness of that regal figure.

Slowly, Zero shook his head. Not in answer to Kaname's question per se, but in realisation that it was time to face the music at last. Time to admit he was well and truly caught. Time to accept the fact that this person standing in front of him now was what he wanted. Yes, he wanted Kaname Kuran. He wanted to _be_ with Kaname. Zero found that he could admit that freely to himself now. He wanted to eat his meals with this enchanting creature sitting opposite him, beguiling him with liquid eyes and happy smiles. He wanted to watch TV with Kaname's dark head resting on his shoulder and those long, elegant fingers entwined with his. He wanted to wake up in bed with Kaname's sleep soft body beside his, waiting to be roused with kisses and caresses until the pureblood thrilled him with soft gasps, incoherent cries and ecstatic screams.

He wanted to be with Kaname. Full stop.

Feeling the familiar longing tingle through him, Zero's lips thinned in resolve. He had made his move by going to see Kaname earlier. It was absurd to back down now, especially when he didn't want to.

"No, Kaname. That wasn't the only reason," he stated quietly. He was admitting that they were more than just brothers-in-law related by marriage. He was admitting that he wanted more out of this than just an arrangement of mutual comfort. He was admitting that he wanted to be... _involved. _

Kaname started breathing again, quick and shallow drawings of breath that did nothing to slow down the frantic beat of his heart. Cautious relief replaced the anxious expression on his face, his stance relaxing just a little.

"So why else did you come to see me?" he whispered. Zero took a step closer, listening intently to the resultant hitch of that soft breathing that suddenly seemed more important than anything else in the world.

"Because I missed you," he admitted in a low voice. Kaname's eyes fluttered closed in relief. Zero didn't need the voice in his head to tell him just how much Kaname was clinging to his words because those chocolate eyes had opened and the pureblood was again staring at him as if nothing else in the world existed.

"Zero, what did you - I need to know - what did you miss about me?" he asked. A small frown drew Zero's brows together - what was there _not_ to miss about Kaname?

"Was it my blood?"

Zero blinked in surprise, hearing the thread of apprehension in Kaname's voice. Then he shook his head. He loved Kaname's rich blood, he was addicted to it! But it wasn't the first thing that jumped to his mind. Zero frowned. Biting Kaname now seemed less like a necessity and more of a prelude to a delightfully sensual make out session. Geez, he was either one hell of a stabilised Level D... or one crazy anomaly of a vampire. Zero ignored the surprised giggle sounding in his head.

"Was it my body then?"

The apprehension in Kaname's voice had given way to barely concealed hurt. Zero blinked again. He found Kaname's physical form alluring and unbelievably sensual but although his body certainly was one of the reasons, it wasn't the most important one. When Zero shook his head again, Kaname's eyes widened a fraction. He started worrying unconsciously at his lower lip, drawing Zero's immediate attention.

"My... kisses?"

Kaname's voice dropped to a whisper on the second word. Zero shook his head in sheer disbelief. How could Kaname sell himself short like this, thinking that the only things he had to offer were his physical attributes? Kaname clenched his hands tightly by his sides. His composure was crumbling once more and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

_Zero, I can't take the suspense anymore…_

Seeing that silent plea in those eyes, Zero knew he had denied them both long enough. The reward was right in front of him, if he only dared to reach out and grab it with both hands.

"No - yes - all of them but they're not what I missed the most!" he groaned in frustration. It was Kaname's turn to blink, the tip of his pink tongue coming out to moisten his lips. His heart was about to burst right out of his chest from the suspense.

"What then?" he breathed. Zero glared at him before giving up with a loud exhalation. He was going to hear more nonsense in his head in just a few moments, he just knew it!

"I missed your smiles, OK? I missed every single, perfect one of them," he ground out. Kaname's eyes widened in surprise in the same instant that a soft 'Oh!' sounded in Zero's head. He ignored it.

"I missed your eyes, the way they light up when you look at me," he added. His voice had softened a little despite knowing he was well on the way to waxing lyrical. Kaname's perfect mouth fell open and another 'Oh!' sounded in Zero's head. He ignored that as well.

"I missed your lips, the way you pout them when you want your damned way," he went on doggedly, his cheeks already burning. That little mannerism of Kaname's actually annoyed him as much as it entranced. Oh my, whispered the little voice in his head in seeming awe before following up with a tiny giggle. Zero gritted his teeth, almost developing an eye twitch.

"I missed the way you blush when you're embarrassed," he continued flatly, his voice increasing in volume to drown out all unwanted sounds. It was a close call as to which gasp he heard first - Kaname's or that dratted voice's.

"I missed the way you're always chasing after me to bite you." In just a heartbeat, Zero's voice had gone from strident to soft, from flat to earnest. Kaname's lashes lowered almost shyly to hide his eyes, fanning against creamy skin that was imbued with the most enchanting flush ever. Was the voice inside Zero's head blushing as well? He took an impulsive step forward, arms already aching to drag the pureblood into his arms.

"I missed the way you always wait on me even though you needn't. I missed the way you treat me like I'm someone important to you. Someone _special_," Zero continued, his voice now starting to shake. Kaname's vision blurred immediately in response. He wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.

_Someone special? Just someone special? Zero, you can't still pretend ignorance...!_

A soft thud echoed inside Zero's head, rather as if something had fallen over. Hoping it was that voice and not part of his unraveling brain, he shook his head - not to awaken the former - but because he was so frustrated. The feelings inside him were growing and escalating, while words were so... so _useless!_ They couldn't convey what he really wanted to say, the sheer depth of how _much_ he had missed Kaname. The groggy grumbling inside his head wasn't helping either.

"All of you, Kaname! All right? I missed every single thing about you!"

That did it. Kaname sucked in a sharp breath but his eyes welled up anyway. By now, Zero's chest was aching so hard it hurt to even breathe. He just held out his arms and Kaname uttered a little cry as he threw himself into them. The resultant hug was needless to say, much too tight for comfort and precisely because of that, absolutely blissful.

"God, this past week's been hell!" Zero groaned, his face buried in fragrant silky hair, his arms happily full of Kaname at last.

"T-tell me about it," the pureblood choked out, his face pressed to Zero's shoulder. He was a right mess now but it was hard to really care about unimportant things like propriety or pride or even the fact that he was ruining Zero's T-shirt when he was this deliriously happy. He just soaked up the solid warmth of Zero's embrace and his beloved scent, feeling it wash away the stinging loneliness of the past week. No, not just week. Months. _Years_.

Zero was supremely content to just hold Kaname as the latter choked back his sobs but as soon as Kaname raised his head, he swooped in for a kiss. A deep and thorough kiss that lasted just half a minute before Kaname tasted his own blood. It was followed almost immediately by a regretful groan vibrating into his mouth, Zero having realised that one of his fangs had dug into the inside of Kaname's full lower lip.

"Sorry," he mumbled. The unexpected taste was bright, sharp and oh so delicious that sudden hunger rushed through him. Unbearably tempted by that tiny taste of heaven, Zero rubbed the tip of his tongue almost compulsively over the healing cut, causing Kaname to shudder delightfully in his arms.

"I was wrong," Zero said huskily, his words causing his lips to slide erotically against Kaname's. The pureblood squirmed in delight.

"A-about what?" he demanded in a shaky whisper that created yet another kiss. With another muted groan, Zero pulled his head away. Kaname opened his eyes, mesmerised as he always was by the sight of those crimson eyes staring fixedly on him. He was mesmerised by the promise of those needle sharp fangs, mesmerised by the lust for blood he could see painted on Zero's face, lust for _his_ blood.

"About not missing this," Zero growled, his hungry gaze flicking to Kaname's neck before returning to his eyes. Kaname reacted instantly, throat going dry, heart rate speeded up, blood rushing in a swift downward flow, every adrenaline filled molecule seemingly determined to reach its destination first.

"Bite," he managed. "Bite. N-now."

Hardly the most eloquent thing Zero had heard coming from Kaname but certainly succinct enough to convey what they both wanted. Ignoring the triumphant squeals echoing in his head, Zero all but dragged the pureblood down the corridor. Before Kaname's bedroom door had closed fully, Zero was already whipping his tee shirt off of his head. He tossed it down onto the bed before pushing Kaname's hands away, dealing with the shirt buttons rapidly. As soon as Kaname was done shedding tie, jacket and shirt in a frantic blur of action, Zero tugged him close. Kaname obeyed willingly, head already tilted to the left, a radiant smile blossoming on his lips.

Hurriedly, Zero ran his tongue over the familiar bite area again and again, heedless of the torment of his ragged breathing buffeting pale, sensitive skin. Kaname whimpered and pressed even closer, eyes sliding shut in sweet anticipation. It seemed an eternity before those beloved fangs staked their claim on him and he moaned his relief, legs going weak almost immediately.

Zero's feeding was almost lacking in gentleness after a week's abstinence. He wasn't injured or starving but he _was_ aroused and he felt different. Consciously admitting to himself and to Kaname what he wanted made for a strangely liberating sense of freedom and relief. His resolve in confessing how he felt, the lack of guilt accompanying his words, Kaname's charming uncertainty, the sweetness of his response culminating with that unexpected burst of Kaname's gorgeous blood on his tongue just made everything _that much_ better, the sensations amplified multiple fold.

Zero was lost the moment his fangs found refuge deep inside Kaname's neck. The warm coppery nectar flooding his mouth tasted like the sweetest ambrosia, he literally groaned in pure vampiric bliss. There was so much power, so much love imbued in that silky warm liquid that he was suddenly and rapidly ravenous for it. Kaname was unsurprisingly ecstatic, his mouth opened in a soundless moan of never ending delight, his eyes tightly closed as if to better savour the utter bliss of his beloved's almost rough bite.

Zero rocked his hips forward, thrusting aggressively against Kaname's, thrilled to find a mirroring hardness against his own. The breathless, hitching gasps going past his ear left Zero in no doubt of Kaname's reaction. He loosened his hold around Kaname and slid his hands downwards over a slender back, worshipping impossibly silky smooth skin as he went. The two faint indentations at the base of that graceful spine soon alerted Zero to his destination. Reverently, he trailed his fingertips past the charming dimples, causing an adorable shiver from Kaname. Zero paused only to gulp another mouthful of that sweet, rich blood and blinked in somewhat dazed surprise when the waistband of Kaname's trousers prevented his hands from moving any further. It wasn't Kaname's fault of course but Zero retaliated with an almost harsh suck that pulled a surprised yelp from the pureblood.

With a triumphant smirk, Zero pushed Kaname's hips just back enough to get his hands between their bodies. In the blink of an eye, belt buckle and trouser zipper were both undone. In the blink of another, Kaname's trousers and underwear had been pushed down to his ankles where he stepped out of them instinctively. Zero growled as he slid his hands around to the pureblood's taut buttocks, fingers splaying wide against the taut, rounded cheeks with nothing between them at last.

Kaname's current moan turned to a choked off cry as Zero held him fast and ground their hips together with a total lack of shyness. He pulled his fangs free and plunged them back into the unsuspecting neck, making Kaname jerk violently as he let loose a delighted shriek. The feel of their hard lengths rubbing and sliding against each other defied description. Kaname clutched desperately at Zero's arms and when he felt his body slide further down, he grasped the hunter's shoulders instead.

"C-can't stand..." he gasped into Zero's ear.

With superhuman effort, Zero dragged his fangs out, his chest heaving as he tried to control himself. He had obviously taken more than he intended. Drawing deep gulps of air into his lungs, Zero ignored the arousal pounding through his body and focused on licking the puncture wounds closed instead. He knew what was coming next but he would get to that soon enough.

"Put your arms around my neck," Zero rasped. Kaname obeyed instinctively and Zero somehow managed to shove and wriggle his own track bottoms down, stepping out from them. When he straightened up, Kaname froze upon seeing the sensual intent in Zero's face.

"Together, Kaname?" the hunter whispered, the husky tone of his voice sliding over Kaname's highly strung nerves like raw silk.

"Y-yes," Kaname nodded his hasty agreement without quite knowing what he was agreeing to. He just knew it wasn't something he was going to regret. When Zero saw the slight bewilderment on the pureblood's face, he gave a tantalisingly slow grin.

"Hold on then," he murmured. He shifted even closer to Kaname, boldly wrapping the fingers of both hands around their erections. Kaname blushed furiously, eyes darting to Zero's in shocked comprehension, mouth falling open.

_T-together. I - I see..._

He was only just in time to suck in a breath before those strong fingers were in motion.

Massaging.

Stroking.

Rubbing.

_Fisting._

The glorious, thrilling friction that resulted sent need tingling along their nerves and desire burning through their veins, muscles almost cramping in response. A soft gasp escaped Kaname's lips as he hung onto Zero's neck for dear life. He looked down between their bodies, enraptured by the unbelievable sight of his pale length in Zero's grasp, right next to the hunter's own erection. He was almost undone by the unbelievable sight of their flushed, sticky heads sliding and rubbing together as Zero fisted them both with tight, mercilessly sharp jerks. He wasn't in the mood to tease, titillate or torture Kaname this time. He just wanted to ride the shortest possible path to release and drag the pureblood along with him.

Their breathing left their parted lips in an increasingly ragged cadence in time to Zero's almost frenzied movements. With their emotions roused to fever pitch by the weeklong wait, it took only moments before soft cries started spilling uncontrollably from Kaname's lips, cries that escalated to near wails as Zero brought them closer and closer to an earth shattering release.

"Ze –Zero!" Kaname sobbed as he pressed his face into Zero's shoulder, eyes watering at the unbearable pleasure of knowing Zero was undoing them both at the same time. His insides were clenched tightly with tension and Zero had taken a lot of his blood, leaving him lightheaded, shaky and unbearably aroused. With a deep groan, Zero tightened his grip and almost immediately, Kaname's cries escalated to beautifully abandoned screams, the sweetest of sounds to Zero's ears. They both erupted just seconds later, Kaname a screaming, sobbing mess of ecstasy as milky liquid spilled out from between Zero's fingers, marking their heaving chests and abdomens.

Gasping for breath, his body wracked by violent shudders, Zero continued fisting them nonstop. Kaname's legs gave out completely, almost pulling them both to the carpet. Too breathless to curse, Zero hurriedly moved them onto the bed, falling onto it and twisting sideways as Kaname collapsed onto him. He released his hold on their spent flesh at last and scooped the shaking pureblood into his arms, listening with utmost satisfaction to the soft cries still tumbling from those flushed, parted lips.

Kaname always, _always_ made everything worth it.

- o -

It took a long while for heartbeats to slow down and shivers to recede. Zero eventually opened his eyes and smiled, breathing in the heady scent of their passion lingering in the air.

"Well, was that as good as you remembered?" he asked teasingly. He had never really thought of doing it simultaneously like this but coming at that same instant - wow. Zero could still feel the small, pulsing echoes of Kaname's bliss within him, as if his body was rendered sensitive by his donor's gift over the years. In answer, Kaname looked over his shoulder and nodded, a shy smile dancing about his lips. He turned around fully and pushed Zero onto his back before crawling on top of him. With his hands braced on either sides of Zero's head, Kaname lowered his head and gave Zero a kiss - a deep, lush and bold salutation that left no part of the hunter's mouth unexplored. When he finally raised his head, Kaname smiled into Zero's somewhat stunned eyes.

"It was better than good, Zero. It was amazing," he said huskily. "I love you."

Zero's smile turned a little shaky.

"You said that already," he mumbled. Kaname hunched a creamy shoulder in a shrug.

"Oh, I plan to say it a lot more from now on," he promised Zero seriously. He saw the 'why' in the soft amethyst eyes and smiled.

"I've kept it inside me for so long," he murmured softly, his gaze turning unbelievably earnest yet almost sad. "Waiting for the day I could finally tell you how I feel. Now that I can, Zero, I - I'm not going to stop saying it. I love you. I love you _so much_."

Zero stared up at him, his throat closing up. How could taking care of this bewitching creature be wrong in anyway?

"It's all right if you never say it back to me," Kaname said. "I'll say it for both of us."

Zero's glance flicked away.

"It's not fair to you," he mumbled. A soft laugh brought his gaze back to Kaname who smiled at him.

"Not fair?" he echoed softly. "Zero, I'm finally with the person I love! What's unfair about that?"

Zero's eyes turned anguished. He reached up to grasp Kaname's shoulders, shaking him slightly.

"Because I don't know if I can ever -"

In an instant, Kaname's slender fingers were held to Zero's lips, hushing the hunter.

"I'll say it for both of us," he repeated. "I know you care for me, Zero. I - that's good enough."

A few moments passed before Zero nodded and offered Kaname a crooked smile, his eyes smarting.

"I do care," he mumbled. "I... all right."

He settled back on the pillows with a sigh. Kaname sat up and scooted to the side of the bed, returning with a handful of tissues which he used to judiciously clean them both up.

"Shower," Zero mumbled a half hearted suggestion. He cracked open one eye to see Kaname shaking his head adamantly.

"Later," he said. Placing the used tissues on the night stand, he lay back down and pillowed his head on Zero's shoulder in the determined manner of a child demanding to be indulged. He didn't care about the lazy chuckle above his head - it was too small a price to pay for the incredible cocoon of sleepy wellbeing he found himself in.

"Kaname?" Zero asked after a while. He felt the pureblood stir, silky hair brushing his chin. A soft yawn sounded.

"Yes?"

"Did you... touch yourself? I mean, in this past week?"

Zero fought not to squirm as Kaname quickly sat up, eyes wide at his words.

"You mean, did I masturbate?" he asked with a confused frown. Zero averted his gaze, allowing the soft rise and fall of Kaname's chest to catch his attention. The suggestion of ribs under that pale skin was more pronounced. Despite himself, a tendril of guilt curled through Zero. It was obvious Kaname hadn't been eating well, to have lost noticeable weight in just one week. Zero's mouth twisted ruefully. He was going to cook spaghetti tomorrow. With seafood. And cream sauce. Extra parmesan too, he decided absently. And it would be grilled eggplant the next day... probably with -

"Zero? Is that what you meant?"

Zero looked up, jerked out of his planning this weekend's menu. He nodded at Kaname's innocently enquiring look.

"Yeah," he muttered. "Did you?"

A delicate flush suffused Kaname's cheeks but he nodded readily.

"When I was showering and if I happened to think of you," he confessed.

_Which was only each time I showered, every single day..._

Kaname dipped his head, peeping up through his lashes at Zero as if confessing to something naughty. Zero chuckled at the sight, pulling Kaname back down to kiss him soundly on the lips.

"Good to know I wasn't the only one," he said dryly. Kaname's soft laugh made Zero smile in spite of himself. With a happy sigh, the pureblood shifted closer, lifting a leg across the hunter's thigh. He hummed in utter contentment as Zero's arm curled around his shoulder, the hunter's soft scent surrounding him, making him feel loved and safe. He adored Zero's sensual attentions of course – the mere memory of what had happened just minutes ago was enough to make him blush - but as far as Kaname was concerned, the quiet bliss of cuddling up after really was the best part of it all. It was the only thing which could negate the profound loneliness that had been his one companion for so many years.

"Let's go visit Yuuki this evening?" he murmured sleepily after a while, unable to keep his eyes open. Another soft yawn followed. Kaname was well on his way to dreamland by now.

"If you like," Zero replied softly, his fingertips moving gently over Kaname's impossibly smooth shoulder. The pureblood shifted closer with a sound that a satisfied cat might make.

"'Course I do," he mumbled and promptly fell asleep. Zero was tired too. He had gone for a long run around the campus after coming back from Kaname's office but the pureblood's words left him awake and just a little uneasy. He had visited Yuuki's grave three times in the past week but each time, he found himself withholding certain information from her... information pertaining to her beloved onii-sama. Zero had never kept secrets from his dearest before. He sighed, pressing a kiss against the tousled curls resting on his shoulder.

Was Kaname going to tell his sister the things her husband couldn't?

- o -

The cemetery was quiet at half past ten. It was technically closed but the old caretaker making his rounds recognised Zero from his dutiful early morning visits and just waved the two vampires in. Kaname had brought white roses to accompany Zero's daisies and the two of them slowly walked past the many tombstones shining in the light of the half moon. When they came to the one they sought, they knelt down beside it and placed their offerings upon the grassy surface.

"Hello, dearest, Kaname is here," Zero murmured. He was used to the grief that clouded his eyes and tightened his throat each time he came here. But this time, he felt something else as well - something... something new, something sweet. A poignant tug at his heart that was somehow separate from the familiar ache of his grief. It felt almost as if... well, as if something had changed. Zero frowned to himself, wondering if it was due to Kaname's presence beside him but it couldn't be. Kaname had accompanied him here before.

It was only after ten minutes of silence that Zero realised that Kaname hadn't said anything beyond a hushed greeting to his sister. He had never run out of things to tell her before but when another ten minutes passed by in the same soft silence, Zero grew concerned. Gently, he nudged Kaname's shoulder.

"Are you all right?" he asked softly. Kaname nodded but kept his head bowed. Zero shrugged and turned to look around them. There was nothing remotely frightening about being in a graveyard at night. It was cool and comfortable without the heat of the sun. As he feared neither ghosts nor spirits nor the long deep shadows cast by the moon shining on the marble slabs, Zero was able to appreciate the quiet serenity of his surroundings. He almost didn't hear Kaname's words a minute later, so softly were they whispered.

"Forgive me, Yuuki."

Before Zero could say or do anything, Kaname had risen to his feet with his usual grace. Zero found himself torn between wanting to ask... and wanting to pretend he hadn't heard those words. Even if Kaname had wanted him to hear them, Zero knew they were meant for Yuuki and Yuuki alone.

- o -

Akira arrived at Cross Academy late Monday evening, pleased to find a much improved in disposition employer than the one he had driven there three days ago. Kaname was as composed and approachable as ever but he looked so much more relaxed. The dark eyes seemed to sparkle with good humour and his lips were more often than not lifted in a smile. Akira happily stowed Kaname's bag in the car boot before letting Zero pull him in for coffee. The hunter was in just as a good mood as the pureblood was - both of them a far cry from the subdued, unhappy vampires he had ferried to different destinations just ten days ago. In minutes, Akira found himself comfortably seated at Zero's kitchen table with a steaming cup of coffee and a thick slice of warm chocolate cake awaiting his delectation. He breathed in the heavenly aroma and grinned to himself in satisfaction.

Half an hour later, Akira was back behind the wheel and Kaname was settled in the backseat of the limousine, lips still tingling from Zero's passionately delivered kiss. He couldn't wait for their relationship to develop further, but right now he was content... happy... no, _thrilled_. Thrilled that Zero seemed to have finally let go of his mountain of unwarranted guilt. With a contented sigh, Kaname fished out his hand phone and started reviewing his schedule for the next couple of months. He would try to keep Friday nights free from now on. Or failing that, Monday evenings.

- o -

The next couple of weeks passed quickly enough, with intensely satisfying weekends spent at Cross Academy. As Zero seemed most comfortable at his home, Kaname travelled to his previous school each weekend without complaint. He never failed to bring gourmet take out despite Zero's somewhat resigned protests. Kaname's charming reply was inevitably the same - that he didn't want Zero to cook for him when there were better things the hunter could occupy his time with. Or his fangs? Zero would deadpan, bringing forth a familiar smile from Kaname. Zero would then shake his head and give in, imbibing his appetizer of fresh pure blood right there and then, followed by a tugging of hands towards Kaname's bedroom for more delicious activities. It would be an hour or so later before they reappeared to unpack the food and have an intimate supper before dawn arrived.

The rest of the weekend would pass in the same relaxing manner. Zero would cook for Kaname, fussing over the pureblood and making sure he took second helpings of everything from soups and stews to chicken pies and casseroles to spaghetti and rice, making Kaname feel as if he was being fatted up for a reason. Good thing his clothes still fit.

Kaname refused to think of work during those weekends, refused to think of anything except Zero and how much pleasure he could bring him. They even made out on the couch one early Sunday morning since the Headmistress was not around. Most of the time though, they ended up in Kaname's room and would doze off in each other's arms after bringing blissful release to each other. Kaname was growing equally adept at employing his hands or mouth or even both as he made Zero blush and moan his way through a series of shattering orgasms. More often than not, another sensual session would occur after lunch with a quick catnap following that one.

Kaname would then arrive back at his office with a smile on his face and a spring in his usually sedate step. This was the life he had dreamed of for years - the knowledge that he was no longer alone, that someone was thinking of him, that someone cared for him. He was ecstatically happy with how much Zero had changed as well. There was no more talk of guilt over what they did, Zero was openly willing to pleasure him. The only thing that remained was the fact that Zero never seemed interested in... well, in going further. Having longed to be in Yuuki's place for years, Kaname was more than ready for added intimacy, but Zero seemed perfectly content with what they indulged in.

It was on their third weekend that Kaname brought up his next plan. Seiren was once again overseas to overlook a couple of problems one of his subsidiaries was facing. She wouldn't be able to fly back in time to accompany him to a dinner party but perhaps it was just as well. Kaname wanted to involve Zero more in his life and this dinner was the perfect excuse, seeing as how Zero had posed as his bodyguard before and even better, had garnered Seiren's rare trust.

A small smile tilted Kaname's lips. Seiren hadn't missed the marked difference in his behaviour these past two weeks either. It wasn't her place to comment on his personal life but she seemed satisfied over the outcome. In fact, when Kaname left his office last Friday night, Seiren had given him her almost smile with a most unexpected 'Enjoy your weekend, Kaname-sama'. Kaname had smiled all the way to the car.

He loved Zero and he wanted Zero in his life everyday, not just on weekends. He wanted the hunter to be more comfortable in his world. That would of course take some time but getting him to stay at his penthouse in the city was the first step.

- o -

_A few days later…_

"Do you have to attend this dinner, Kaname?" Zero sighed. Kaname gave a casual shrug, stirring the tea in his mug. They were rounding off a lazy lunch of sandwiches and Caesar salad with the pureblood happily dressed in one of Zero's shirts and jeans, his hair still damp from a recent shower.

"This is one of the few I can't avoid," he said softly. Zero shifted uncomfortably knowing how much Kaname valued his privacy.

"I wouldn't actually have asked you," Kaname began with a perfect amount of apology in his soft voice that had Zero squinting at him suspiciously.

"But?"

Kaname's enchanting smile could charm a bird right off the tree. Or a hunter from his home.

"Seiren is overseas. You're the only one she trusts."

"Riiiight."

Kaname wasn't the only one who could control how his voice sounded - Zero was quite proud of the perfect amount of polite sarcasm in his. Well, whoop-de-doo, intoned the voice inside his head with a dollop more sarcasm than his. Zero ignored it.

"My penthouse has a stunning view of the city and an indoor pool," Kaname added, the invitation in his eyes blatantly innocent.

"I can swim here. We have a lake, you know," Zero returned as casually.

"The bed in my penthouse is much larger than the one I have here and very, very comfortable," Kaname pouted, the invitation in his eyes morphing from innocent to sensual in an instant.

"Why would we need such a large bed?" Zero managed that whole question without blushing but a sudden sharp pain in his temple left him wondering if voices could kick.

"The kitchen is outfitted with every known convenience but sadly, they've never been used." Kaname murmured, the invitation in his eyes now unapologetic and determined. He knew that in Zero's eyes, having a kitchen like that but eating out every night – or not at all - was nothing short of a crime. One more sharp pain in his other temple and Zero found himself caving in with embarrassing swiftness.

"Fine."

That voice was pure evil and its snicker was sure to drive him mad one day.

- o -

_The next weekend…_

The dinner party was everything Zero expected. He had attended enough of them in the past to know what they were like - exquisite homes, sumptuously prepared food and drink, the works really. It took Zero almost twenty minutes to realise that he hadn't once felt like whipping out Bloody Rose and that his eyebrows were behaving like distant acquaintances tonight. In other words, everything was as it should be. Every single person in the mansion was a vampire of course, from the only pureblood guest, to the nobles that made up both hosts and guests, to the Level C servants... but they were all on their best behaviour. A bit disconcerting, but true.

Zero squared his shoulders under the plain but immaculately tailored black jacket he wore. It was his 'bodyguard suit', his uniform to such outings. Kaname had had the suit tailored for him many years ago. As Zero could still count on two hands the number of times he had worn it, he hadn't needed another and bluntly told the pureblood so.

Speaking of Kaname...

Zero looked around, craning his neck to catch a glimpse of that familiar head. Topped with the softest, most lustrous locks of dark silky hair, sighed the voice in his head which had up until now held its tongue. Zero sighed and took another sip of fine champagne. He was very well acquainted with said hair, he told the voice righteously. He had spent enough hours in bed with those lustrous, fragrant strands tickling his nose and chin, thank you. Zero scowled into his drink.

After a moment, he resumed his searching. Ah - there was Kaname in one corner of the ballroom, conversing easily with Lord Hideyoshi and Lady Hikaru, their hosts. Kaname seemed genuinely interested in what the elder, distinguished looking vampire was saying. Looking at him with those gorgeous, melted chocolate eyes framed with lashes that should be outlawed, helpfully supplied the same voice, obviously deciding that it had remained silent long enough. Zero wondered if it had inhaled invisible fumes from his champagne each time he took a sip. Well, he was very much acquainted with said eyes too, he told the voice dryly. He had been on the receiving end of that limpid, open gaze more times than he cared to count, and knew how they could melt his heart and the trousers off him faster than he could say his own name. He gave the contents of his glass another scowl.

When Kaname threw his head back to laugh at what had to be the punch line of a joke, Zero pressed his lips into a thin line. Don't even think of it, he told the voice grimly. He knew that beautiful, perfect, succulent mouth very well by now. Knew of its temptation and its taste, its teasing and its talents. Zero groaned into his drink when he realised that the voice hadn't actually said anything this time.

_Right. I walked right into that one._

Ignoring the peals of hysterical laughter echoing inside his brain, Zero tossed back the rest of his drink, hoping that _something_ would choke on it. It was a good thing Kaname was dressed in that perfectly cut suit otherwise... Zero took a deep breath and squared his shoulders again.

Fine. He had had enough of this dinner, as polite as everyone was. He was going to grab Kaname and head back home - to that swanky penthouse, he meant. He was going to sweep the pureblood up into his arms and carry him past that gleaming kitchen with all its conveniences, past the windows with the stunning views, and toss the pureblood onto that ridiculously enormous bed of his. Zero was going to fall right on top of him, and then he was going run his fingers through that lustrously silky hair, smile into those gorgeously melting eyes and kiss that beautifully perfect mouth.

Right after that, he was going to strip the pureblood of his suit, expose his long, graceful neck and - and -

_Stop. Get him out of here first._

- o -

Kaname blinked when he noticed a very determined looking Zero Kiryuu making his way towards him. The hunter's face was lightly flushed but his eyes were focused, the amethyst colour brilliant and intense. Kaname saw Zero place his empty wineglass on a passing waiter's tray without even looking at it. A part of him was impressed but the other was busily wondering if that attractive flush was due to alcohol or something else. Something that could make his heart accelerate, for example. Kaname's pureblood control instinctively kicked into action, causing him to stand straighter while forcing his body's involuntary actions to resume their normal pace. At a place like this, anything out of the ordinary would instantly garner attention, and Kaname was the only pureblood here. The other guests might keep a respectful distance but not their attention especially when he had arrived with a well known vampire hunter.

Kaname knew his hosts would not be insulted in any way if he had turned down their invitation but he had accepted due to a number of reasons. He had a good working relationship with Lord Hideyoshi, the parties the elder vampire threw were decent and lacked the more traditional vampire customs Kaname and Zero detested. Besides, the invitation had come at the right time - Seiren's absence provided the perfect excuse for Zero to accompany the pureblood.

"Kaname-sama, you have an appointment in fifteen minutes," Zero murmured as soon as he approached Kaname. He stood at a discreet distance with his stance perfectly deferential but the brief look he gave Kaname was anything but submissive. Kaname stiffened his spine, instinctively stilling the shiver that had started to snake up it.

"Thank you, Kiryuu-san. I confess the company so pleasant, I had almost forgotten," Kaname gave Lady Hikaru a charming smile, lifting her hand to his lips.

"Well, you certainly know how to make your excuses, Kuran-sama," the older lady replied, her smile almost motherly as she regarded him fondly. "I didn't realise you had another appointment but please don't let us keep you. We have been honoured by your presence."

"Thank you, my lady," Kaname murmured. He made equally gracious excuses to Lord Hideyoshi and left the mansion swiftly with Zero a step behind. Heads turned to see the dashing pureblood and his equally eye catching bodyguard leave but Kaname did not stop, merely nodding to those he recognised. In less than two minutes, they were comfortably ensconced in the backseat of the limousine.

With the partition safely up, Kaname turned to Zero. The intent amethyst gaze alone was enough to ensure him of another sensual session as soon as they arrived home. Kaname couldn't help smiling. Perhaps Zero could be persuaded to try the hot tub this time.

"So," he said softly as he edged closer to Zero. "This appointment I'm supposed to have in fifteen minutes..."

Zero didn't even blink.

"Thirteen."

Kaname swallowed, familiar tendrils of arousal curling through him. His blood hummed expectantly in his veins, warming his body.

"And what happens in thirteen minutes' time?" he asked innocently. Zero's eyes flashed.

"I'm going to throw you on that enormous bed of yours and have my wicked way with you."

Shocked out of his teasing, Kaname's mouth fell open. Zero stifled a groan. Oh God. That wasn't him, that was the champagne talking! All right, so he had thought about ravishing Kaname, who in their right mind wouldn't? But it was one thing to want something, it was another thing to know it was just... well, just wishful thinking. Oh, for the love of heaven! groaned the voice.

"You will? Really?" Kaname's smile was almost bright enough to warrant sunglasses. Zero's gaze skittered away, his brashness vanishing immediately.

"No, of course not" he muttered evasively. Brought down to earth with a silent thud, Kaname's heart almost stopped beating.

"Why not?" he asked. Zero glared at him. Was Kaname deliberately pretending ignorance?

"I was only kidding," he said shortly, turning to look out the window. A hand clasped his shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze.

"But I'm not," Kaname said calmly. Zero twisted around to face him.

"About what?" he asked warily. Kaname narrowed his eyes. Was Zero deliberately pretending ignorance ?

"About you ravishing me," he said evenly. Zero's eyes widened in shock.

"Are you serious? Kaname, you're a pureblood!"

"Who's in love with you," Kaname reminded him steadily. Zero shrugged and turned away again.

"That doesn't change a thing," he muttered. The slim hand on his shoulder tightened, forcing him to turn around.

"It changes everything!" Kaname insisted. He sighed a moment later, a deprecating smile playing about his lips.

"Well, in public, you know that -"

Zero snorted, cutting him off.

"I don't care what goes on in public, Kaname. I care about when it's just the two of us."

_Just the two of us. _

Kaname's mouth went dry at the incredibly tempting words. Zero took a deep breath. He wanted to know where he stood. He wanted more out of this - this relationship they had. But Kaname was a pureblood and while Zero wasn't, he had his own pride too. He wanted more... but he wanted it on his own terms, as selfish and illogical as it sounded.

"I'm ready for more intimacy, Kaname," he said quietly. The back of the limousine might be completely sound proofed but Zero knew his face was hot. Kaname swallowed again.

"Me too," he whispered. Oh God, Zero wanted more... Kaname's mind was a mess of mindless, shrieking happiness, of jumping up and down, of every manner of celebration possible.

"But I won't - I _can't_ submit, not even to you. I don't care how it goes in public but when it's the two of us, I want to be the one to – to claim, to take. Always, Kaname."

Zero tried to sound confident but his words came out sounding rather forced. Hard. Demanding. Surprising really, considering how damned skittish he had acted for so long. He tried retracting a little.

"Uh, I mean - well, I know you've always been -"

Kaname shook his head, a wondering smile trembling on his lips.

"I've never thought of it as 'submitting', Zero," he said softly. "I've always thought that making love with someone is just expressing your feelings with that person. _For_ that person."

_Which is why I've never wanted anyone else._

Zero stared at Kaname, feeling horribly embarrassed after that outburst, especially in light of Kaname's calm demeanour. He stared at the pureblood and was once again, enraptured by his smile.

"I've always envied Yuuki for being able to give herself to you," Kaname continued, holding Zero's stunned gaze. He slid closer and put his lips next to Zero's ear, his hands reaching for the hunter's.

"I've always wanted to give myself to you the same way," he whispered shyly before drawing back.

"Zero, I want you to claim my body when we make love. Every single time," he said solemnly, holding the hunter's shocked gaze with his calm one, holding his shaking hands with his own surprisingly steady ones. Zero's breathing turned shallow at those surprising words, a blinding rush of blood and arousal flooding through his body. In a heartbeat, he found himself hard with desire and humbled almost to the point of tears.

"Why...?" he choked out. When Kaname's eyes started to shimmer, Zero knew there was no escaping this astounding, entrancing creature. Not that he would ever want to.

"Because I'm yours."

Zero's breathing hitched in his throat. He shouldn't be surprised - no, he wasn't surprised. He just hadn't thought it possible.

"Because I love you. So anytime you want me, Zero, I'm yours," Kaname added softly, his eyes glowing with the promise of his words.

_I've always been yours. Even when you didn't know it._

- Chapter End -


	27. Chapter 27: The Surrender

**Author Notes:** Hello and thank you once again for your amazing reviews! *bows* Here at last is the long awaited lemon and an utterly sappy one it is :D Hope you enjoy it!

- Chapter Start -

Zero found it hard to breathe. It felt as if all the oxygen had been sucked out from the air. Of all the words to have escaped Kaname's lips so far, this had to be by far the most erotic. He had just promised Zero his _body_ and on terms that coincided perfectly with the hunter's own. It was mind blowing.

_...I've always wanted to give myself to you the same way..._

It wasn't really _what_ Kaname had said, it was _how_ he had said it. Zero had to clear his throat and even shake his head a little - those words had quite floored him. Of course, the fact that most of the blood in his body had also flowed downwards might have helped a bit.

"Kaname," Zero began huskily, staring into those luminous eyes. There was a readiness in them that made him wonder if he really wanted to ask the questions crowding inside his brain. But he had to. He didn't want to blindly forge ahead and hurt this gentle soul with his ignorance, for the hundredth time. While he hesitated, Kaname squeezed his hands again, offering silent encouragement. He had an inkling of what Zero was going to ask and he hoped that the hunter wouldn't back down as he so often had in the past. Kaname _wanted_ Zero to know and yet, something in him feared the truth would bring nothing but ridicule. Or at best, pity.

"Have you ever been taken before?" Zero finally blurted out, cheeks hot at his own forthrightness. He knew the answer was no. Stupid question really, of course the answer was no! How could it be otherwise?

When Kaname shook his head mutely, Zero nodded. All right, so this was going to be the pureblood's first time _that_ way. Being taken. The very thought of it was enough to make him tremble with awe. He would have to be very careful, go very slow. Partly because it would be his first time as well _that_ way. Taking a male. Zero's heart continued to pound erratically inside his chest. He didn't know if it was due to a sharp increase in desire or trepidation. Perhaps a mixture of both. Or perhaps it was simply a lack of oxygen - the air in the backseat suddenly seemed rather stuffy.

"But you've had sex before?" he persevered. The question came out sounding more like a statement. He wasn't stating his opinion or passing judgment, he had no right to. He just wanted to know how things stood. Stupid question again, of course the answer was yes! Kaname was - well, everyone knew what he was.

And by that statement, it's obvious you don't have a clue, declared the voice in Zero's head, all folded arms and foot tapping exasperation. A tiny, irritated shake of the head was all Zero could spare it. He was still staring at Kaname, entranced and taken aback by the flush slowly suffusing that pale, creamy skin. A tendril of amazement took root in Zero's stomach, growing swiftly as Kaname lifted one shoulder in a hesitant shrug.

"If you count what we've been doing so far as sex, then the answer is yes," he admitted, the look in his eyes and the tone of his voice shyly deprecating.

_Not that I would ever consider what we did as just sex. It was so much more than physical gratification._

Zero's eyes widened.

_Oh God. No. No, Kaname can't _possibly_ mean that those make out sessions are the extent of his..._

"But if you mean whether I've ever been sexually intimate with anyone else other than you, Zero, then the answer is no. No, I haven't," Kaname finished in that same deprecating tone, confirming the hunter's thoughts. The look in those dark eyes was too open to misread, even for someone as expert in denial as Zero was. His heart felt like it had leapt up to his throat and was trying to escape, still pounding madly. The stuffiness in the air seemed to have increased. Yes, there was a definite lack of oxygen in the car. They were probably suffering carbon monoxide poisoning right now, which was why Zero was hearing such impossible things coming out from Kaname's mouth. They would both pass out in a moment, he was sure of it. And when he woke up, Kaname would be chuckling at him and saying of course he was a worldly and experienced pureblood who had had his fill of hundreds of willing males and females. And Zero would punch him in the shoulder and agree that it was a good joke, only the mere thought of Kaname being intimate with anyone else was enough to turn his eyes red with rage. Not jealousy. Just rage.

Kaname read the changing expressions passing swiftly over Zero's face. He gave a little smile, his own eyes showing nothing but beguiling innocence.

"You will be my first, Zero," he confessed, his voice turning a little husky. "You might as well know this."

Zero looked as if he were turned to stone. A statue with an expression of utter shock forever captured on his handsome face.

"You were the first one to bite me, the first one to kiss me and now, you will be the first one to make love to me."

_I can't believe I actually achieved all three! Or will soon. Hopefully, very soon._

Kaname didn't really care that he hadn't been the first one Zero had bitten or kissed or made love to. It was Yuuki who had gotten all three. Kaname was glad it had been her instead of someone else, glad that love and affection had been involved. Well, not that first bite, he had to concede. He had been furious all those years ago when he found out that Zero had finally given into his vampire instincts and bitten Yuuki. But she had never been afraid of Zero and proved it by continuing to give him her blood, even when he tried to resist. To Kaname, that made all the difference in the world. That and the fact that he needed the hunter to protect her when he couldn't.

Zero finally stopped impersonating a statue. He blinked and opened his mouth, but closed it again without saying anything. Kaname smiled and squeezed his hands once more.

"Zero, I want you to. So much. For so long," he added, just in case the hunter tried to renege on his promise. Zero just shook his head in disbelief.

"Why?" he asked in a hoarse whisper. Kaname's smile grew radiant.

"Because I love you," he said simply.

- o -

A few minutes later, they were standing in the dimly lit hall of Kaname's penthouse apartment, Akira having bade them goodnight before driving off to his own home. Zero was still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that Kaname had passed almost half a century without being kissed and without surrendering his innocence. The first was understandable in a way, since a pureblood was justifiably particular over who he kissed. The second was completely incomprehensible. Zero was perfectly fine with the fact that Kaname had never let anyone claim him before, being a pureblood male, but to have never made love or had sex with anyone before? To have just... _waited?_ For him?

_Yup, completely mind blowing._

Even Zero whom many would deride as a hopeless prude if they had known his stance, had indulged in some pretty heavy petting with Yuuki before their marriage. They had only given their virginities to each other on their wedding night, but there had been many delightful occurrences of expressing their love for one another while they dated.

Zero stared at Kaname who was now arranging and rearranging his hand phone, keys and wallet on the console table placed against the wall. He could see the pureblood's embarrassed reflection in the mirror above the table. He was aware of the tension holding that slender body rigid.

"I'm sorry," Zero said quietly. Kaname didn't turn around. His slender, elegant fingers continued fussing with his keys, carefully spreading each piece on the polished surface of the table.

"Why?" he asked in a barely audible tone. "Why are you sorry? Is it because I'm pathetic for not wanting anyone except you? Is it because I'm pathetic for waiting for you to be free? Is it because I'm -"

"No!" Zero groaned. He grabbed Kaname's arm and swung him around. "It's because I -"

He broke off, stunned. Wait. Why was he sorry? That Kaname was apparently - as astounding as the idea may be - exactly like him in this regard? Completely hopeless at separating the needs of his body from the desires of his heart?

"Because what?" Kaname asked. The hopelessness in his eyes was painful to see. Zero sighed and brought his hands up to gently cup the pureblood's face.

"Because you've had to wait so long," he said simply. "Only because of that, Kaname, I swear. Nothing else."

Kaname's shoulders slumped in relief, his eyes glowing now with hope and love.

"And do you..." he paused to lick at his dry lips, drawing Zero's gaze down to them. "... do you think I've waited long enough?"

The plaintive tone made Zero's throat close up. He nodded.

"Yes," he said, pleased that his voice sounded strong and confident. "Yes, you have."

Kaname sucked in a trembling breath, blinking hard.

"Are you saying -" he couldn't get the rest of his words out. There was a lump in his throat. Zero nodded again, holding his gaze.

"I'm saying that I want to make love to you, Kaname," he said steadily. "I want to make love to you right now."

How strange. All the denial of the past... the shyness... the fear... the embarrassment... all of it had fled in this single perfect moment, leaving Zero to fully appreciate the beautiful smile flowering on those perfect lips. Kaname looked as if he had been given the greatest gift of all. Zero was seized by a silly urge to high five that annoying presence in his head. He would have too, if the damned thing weren't squealing madly and sounding as if it were turning cartwheels all over the place. Zero blinked and refocused his attention on the blushing, radiant creature in front of him.

"I'm saying that I want to take you in the most intimate way possible," he added, his voice deepening. "I'm saying that I want to bury myself inside your body and feel your legs wrapped tightly around me."

Zero had no idea where these suggestive words were coming from. He certainly had never before spouted such erotic things to - no. This was about him and Kaname. No one else, not even - no. No one else.

The tears in Kaname's eyes spilled over, turning Zero's predatory look to one of dismayed concern.

"No, please," he whispered, whisking away the liquid with gentle thumbs. Kaname inhaled a shaky breath.

"Don't -" he choked out. "Don't say things you don't mean. Please, I don't think I c-could bear -"

He broke off as Zero dragged him into his arms and silenced him with a deep, thorough kiss.

"I _am _going to make love to you tonight, Kaname!" he whispered fiercely. "Make no mistake about that."

It was right about then that the pureblood broke down completely, sobbing in unrestrained joy. It was a far cry from the seduction he had planned for Zero which consisted of, but was not limited to, a bubbling hot tub, scented candles and fresh satin sheets strewn with rose petals. Still, after spending so many long and lonely years dreaming of this moment, Kaname knew he would take whatever he could get. Everything else could wait. Even thoughtfully prepared seduction scenes. Even being suave and confident about his first time.

- o -

A good half hour passed before Kaname grew quiet again. He kept his face firmly buried in Zero's broad shoulder and had to be coaxed to lift his head to accept a kiss. Zero backed him slowly against the wall as he dropped light kisses onto the closed eyelids, the perfect nose and the most perfect mouth. Kaname smelled utterly divine even with the salty tang of tears. His scent had grown on Zero over the years. It might elicit the utmost longing and respect from other vampires, but to Zero, it was a scent that brought associations of generosity, graciousness, beauty, love, desire and sensual bliss.

He reverently kissed his way from Kaname's quivering mouth to his jaw, moving ever so slowly downwards. Kaname tipped his head back with that sweet willingness that never failed to move Zero. It said more clearly than words that the pureblood was his, that he had _always_ been his. Zero pressed a grateful kiss to those parted lips as he undid the smart bowtie and slid it off. Next were the buttons – those on the jacket, the embroidered vest and then the white silk shirt. Zero bent his face to the long, graceful neck as it was uncovered, paying homage to every single inch of creamy skin exposed. Tasting... smelling... teasing.

Kaname's breathing shallowed considerably, his body wracked with tiny delightful quivers. Even with his eyes closed, Zero was stunningly aware of the rapid flickers of the pulse under that pale sweet skin. Each frantically fluttering beat whispered to him, called to him, invited him to come indulge and drink his fill of the elixir that ran beneath. To add to the temptation, Kaname's head lolled to his left, eyelashes resting against flushed skin. Zero gave in. He touched his tongue to the fluttering skin as if tasting the finest dessert, making Kaname's thighs tremble. He then blew gently on the area he had moistened and Kaname's legs buckled. He grabbed at Zero's arms and blushed when a darkly amused chuckle whispered across one cheek.

"Ask me."

Kaname told himself to resist. This time, he would not beg for those fangs. Zero had already indulged him a few hours earlier, he shouldn't expect him to do so again so soon.

"Kaname, ask me."

The pureblood shook his head at once, vexed at how predictable he was. The same amused chuckle brushed by his ear.

"You know you want it."

Gritting his teeth, Kaname shook his head again, more violently this time.

_No. I won't beg._

Zero simply ran the tip of his tongue across Kaname's bite area again, exerting just enough pressure for the pureblood's sensitive skin to register the butterfly light caress. He heard the soft moan and smiled to himself. After pausing for a tantalising moment, Zero followed up with a light kiss on the same area. Another moan sounded.

"Ask me," Zero whispered persuasively. Kaname squeezed his eyes tightly but a tear slipped out anyway. He was complete putty in Zero's hands.

"Bite me! Please, I - I beg you..."

Kaname ducked his head, but a hissed expletive made him look up again. Zero was glaring at him.

"I wanted you to _ask_ me, Kaname. Tell me. Even order me," he scolded the surprised pureblood. Then he sighed and shook his head.

"Just don't beg, all right?" he whispered. "You don't ever have to beg me to do something so wonderful."

Kaname's eyes shone like stars.

"I love you," he whispered. Zero sighed again.

"I know," he murmured. Kaname saw regret in his eyes but before he could say anything else, Zero dipped his head. He sucked on Kaname's bite area and held him firmly as he plunged his fangs in, thrilling to the scream of pleasure that followed.

- o -

Zero didn't drink much this round but the outcome was still the same. By the time he licked the puncture wounds closed, Kaname was panting and clinging heavily to him. Zero merely placed an arm behind the pureblood's knees and swung him up in his arms.

"W-what are you doing!" Kaname protested, sounding more delighted than anything else.

"Carrying you," was Zero's offhanded answer as he made his way through the darkened penthouse. He had carried Yuuki like this even before they were married and had carried her every night since then. Despite the bittersweet memories, Zero refused to relinquish the person in his arms.

"I can walk," Kaname mumbled. He made a token and embarrassingly half hearted attempt to get down. Oh God, Zero's shoulder was _heaven_ to lean against. The hunter had shed his jacket in the car and Kaname happily enjoyed the warmth of the fine linen shirt, rubbing his cheek against it.

With an effort, Zero shook off the melancholy enveloping him. He didn't want to look back. Not tonight. He had made a decision and he was going to stick to it. He glanced down and quirked an eyebrow at Kaname who was now sniffing happily at his shirt.

"Really?" he drawled. "I get the feeling you'd rather be carried bridal style like this."

"Uhm..."

Kaname's cheeks were a most becoming shade of pink. He had _never_ had anyone carry him bridal style before. It was actually one of Kaname's pet dreams come true, as embarrassing as it may seem. He had seen Zero scoop Yuuki up in his arms a few times in the past when he stayed at Cross Academy. The soft laughter that floated back to him as they made their way to their bedroom had always stayed in Kaname's mind. It seemed like the ultimate gesture of romance to him. To be carried by the person you love, to be held close their heart as if you were someone they treasured. Cherished. And loved.

"Will you carry me like this, Zero? Every day?" Kaname asked impulsively. Zero's confident stride faltered a bit, but he recovered quickly and gave the pureblood a startled look.

"What did you say?" he asked, sounding incredulous.

"I just – never mind," Kaname mumbled. He was being too presumptuous. He had no right to demand to be treated the same as Yuuki regardless of what Zero felt for him.

"Kaname, is it because of how –" Zero hesitated then continued. "Because I will, you know... if you want me to."

His solemn gaze stole Kaname's breath away.

_I want it. Oh God, Zero, I want it everyday!_

Too dazed to speak, Kaname just nodded. When he saw Zero's smile, he knew it was as close to a promise of forever as he was ever going to get. For now, it was enough. It was more than enough.

- o -

Zero didn't switch on any of the room lights in Kaname's bedroom. A half moon hung in the sky and with the heavy drapes already pulled open and fastened to the sides of the French windows, he had all the illumination he needed. Moonlight was the only thing he wanted Kaname to wear tonight.

Zero strode over to the bed, eyeing the covers pulled taut over the wide expanse. A brief tilt of the head and a silent quirk of one eyebrow alerted Kaname to what he wanted. In an instant, the covers were caught up as if by an invisible hand and flung to the foot of the large bed. Zero nodded his thanks and placed a knee on the mattress. Carefully, he lowered Kaname onto the smooth satin sheets and followed almost immediately, bending over the pureblood to press a reverent kiss onto those softly parted lips. Kaname's hair looked inky black against the cream of the sheets, his expressive eyes liquid pools of surrender. He was rendered unbelievably beautiful in moonlight. Zero had to take a couple of deep, fortifying breaths to ground himself before proceeding.

Reverently, he started undressing the enchanting creature lying before him, lifting Kaname's shoulders one at a time to remove the tailored jacket and the vest. Next were the solid gold cufflinks and then the silk shirt. Kaname was pliant and obliging, his worshipping eyes fixed on Zero. He could undress himself of course, but why should he when he was being seduced with such tenderness? He was finally going to know what it was like to be loved, to be claimed, to be ravished by his silver haired hunter, and enjoy every moment of it he would.

Kaname shivered as those lightly calloused fingertips traced the graceful curve of his collar bones. He arched his back in silent invitation and was rewarded a moment later when they trailed lower, teasing his taut nipples with the same feather light touches. Zero was quite acquainted with Kaname's body by now, but it felt different tonight. Everything felt different tonight, including himself. He was going to claim Kaname's body and quite like how his wedding night with Yuuki had gone, the mere knowledge of it made everything startlingly, wonderfully, sparklingly _new_. It was as if he were seeing Kaname's body unclothed for the first time, hearing his adorable responses for the first time and touching every inch of it for the first time.

Zero enjoyed himself, mapping Kaname's heaving chest and arms with his hands, lips and tongue, rediscovering the delights of silky skin and lean muscle. Kaname was so responsive to his touch, all soft gasps and involuntary twitches and moans. It made Zero feel powerful, confident and knowledgeable. He undid the expensive leather belt swiftly before divesting Kaname of his trousers, underwear, socks and shoes, leaving him completely bare to his eyes. Naked, breathtakingly beautiful under the glowing spotlight of the moon... and utterly his to claim and adore.

Zero sat back on his heels. For a long moment, he simply looked his fill. Past memories arose in his mind, superimposing themselves on top of what he was now seeing. Kaname and Yuuki. The same lustrous, silky locks of hair in a colour that the word brown could not begin to do justice to. The same wide set eyes of the most beautiful chocolate ever that no amount of determination or obstinacy could withstand. The same soft skin that felt like pure silk, imbued with a sweetness that came from within.

But along with the similarities were the unmistakable differences. Kaname's chest was flat, while Yuuki's had curves. Kaname's stomach was lean and almost concave when he stretched out on the bed, while Yuuki's had been softly rounded, a testament to motherhood. And of course, the most obvious difference of all - Kaname's proof of masculinity lay proudly visible between his legs, while Yuuki's feminine folds had remained shyly hidden between hers. Zero possessed intimate knowledge of both. He knew how to exact the sweetest of bliss from both brother and sister. Right now though, it was Kaname's body that captured and held his attention, particularly the thick length that lay against that flat stomach. Engorged, heavy and rigid, it was a silent declaration that its owner was one hundred percent virile male despite all that silky hair and soft skin and rose pink nipples.

Zero swallowed at the sight. Perhaps it was because he had never before thought of Yuuki while pleasuring Kaname. Perhaps it was because he had never before given much thought to what lay underneath that tantalising proof of male beauty. He would have to do so now though, if he wanted to continue with this. The lack of experience in that direction left Zero floundering for confidence. All of a sudden, his mind was a complete blank with no idea of what to do next.

"Zero? Why are you stopping?" Kaname whispered. Zero shook his head.

"I don't know," he whispered, feeling an insane urge to laugh. This was probably the millionth time he was second guessing himself from the moment he first learned of Kaname's obsession with his fangs to the time he learned of his love. But this really _was_ different. Different from biting, different from feeding, from pleasuring, from touching. This was _possessing_. Possessing someone's body, penetrating them, marking them as his. This was a degree of involvement that would forever bind him to that person, regardless of what happened afterward, regardless of whether or not vows or rings were exchanged. Zero knew himself, he wasn't the sort of person to change partners on a whim, he stuck with them until the very end.

He was going to make love to a male, to Kaname Kuran. While he was barely managing to get his mind around that fact, he was also almost freaking out at the act itself. Fears continued to grow in his mind, feeding vicariously on his inexperience, blowing away logic and theoretical knowledge. What if he was the only one to get satisfaction out of the act while Kaname suffered in silence? What if the pureblood found it painful and humiliating and repulsive, being spread under someone, feeling helpless and trapped? What if Zero botched the whole darned thing and showed Kaname that his patience and devotion over the years weren't worth it, and that he should have just gone around getting laid at every single opportunity instead of waiting for a straight hunter who had no experience with men, let alone a pureblood?

What if... Zero sucked in his breath. What if he bumbled things enough to make Kaname's love turn to hate or disgust?

Oh, such rubbish! cried the voice, sounding both horrified and shocked. Zero hung his head. Logically, he knew it was rubbish. Kaname wouldn't hate him even if it turned out to be an awkward, unpleasant encounter. But the heart wasn't a logical organ. Zero didn't even know what he was saying. Why was he talking about his heart? It wasn't involved. It wasn't his heart, it was just his conscience that needed to be reassured. Not his heart. He just feared letting Kaname down after all the hype and build up over the past few months. Everything had more or less been leading up to this very moment.

"Zero?" Kaname's voice started to shake. Zero's shoulders slumped.

"I don't know if I can do this," he whispered. Kaname's eyes widened in dismay.

"What? Why not?"

Yes, why not? demanded the voice shrilly. Zero gestured helplessly to Kaname' pale body, laid out in front of him, spread wide and welcoming as he knelt between those long legs, those slender thighs.

"Because I'm a male?" Kaname guessed.

Zero started to shake his head and then he nodded. Actually, he wasn't even sure where this was coming from. Well, I am, declared the voice, back in full foot tapping mode. A clear case of cold feet with a generous dose of wedding night jitters. Zero scowled at it. Darned perceptive... thing!

Kaname raised himself onto his elbows, dread growing inside him. The first time was never the right time. The first time Zero had pleasured him had happened only after he had shouted at him. The first time Zero had kissed him was almost ruined after Kaname had blurted out that it was his first kiss. And now that Zero was going to make love to him... it was only a given that _something_ would stop it. Bad luck came in threes. It always did. Kaname would have chuckled if he weren't feeling so depressed. Slowly, he levered himself upright and gracefully got off the bed.

A quick glance at Zero's erection told him that it mirrored his own - both were flagging. Kaname reached for his discarded shirt at the foot of the bed. He pulled it on as he walked to the door, heedless of the fact that he wasn't wearing anything else. There were no thoughts crowding his head this time. Just a numb emptiness. A bleak resignation that he would never get the love he craved.

"Where are you going?" Zero sounded surprised. Kaname paused at the door. Slowly, he looked around, looking uncharacteristically lost.

"I don't know," he admitted. He turned back to the door and found himself staring at the doorknob with absolutely no idea how to work it. A long drawn out sigh sounded behind him, followed by the soft whisper of the satin sheets.

"Kaname?" Zero's voice was soft. Hesitant. Kaname blanked out every expression of hurt from his face before turning around.

"Do you really, really want this?"

Kaname's eyes widened in shock. Did Zero still think he was kidding? How could he even look surprised?

"Yes!" he answered. He nodded his head vehemently. "Yes, Zero, yes! A _thousand_ times yes!"

Zero didn't even blink.

"And what if I bungle it up?"

It was Kaname who blinked. Was this what Zero was afraid of?

"There is no way you could ever bungle this up, Zero Kiryuu," he said, a note of exasperation creeping into his voice. Zero sighed again, his head dipping forward.

"I've never done it this way," he mumbled.

"I know," Kaname reassured him. The tables had changed again and none of them noticed. "But I also know I have nothing to fear... and everything to look forward to."

"How can you be so sure?" Zero demanded. Kaname just smiled.

"Because I love you," he said simply. Zero wondered if it was worth the effort of dredging up a glare - Kaname's optimism rivaled that of a child sometimes. In the end, he just extended his hand.

"Then come here," he said softly. "I might still botch it up but I'll try my best."

Kaname's radiant smile was back once again, eyes sparkling with anticipation. He walked gracefully back to the bed and lifted a hand to thread his fingers with Zero's, bringing the hunter's hand up to his lips.

"You won't botch this up," he promised. "I know you won't. And even if you do..."

Kaname paused tantalisingly, his eyes sparkling with impish mischief. Zero's lips quirked again.

"Practice makes perfect?" he suggested dryly, ignoring the happy squeals ricocheting inside his skull. Kaname's smile was brighter than the sun.

"Exactly," he whispered. Zero kissed him, ignoring the fireworks going on inside his head that were making him slightly cross eyed. He watched as Kaname shrugged off his shirt before climbing into bed once more. Then it was his turn to watch as Zero removed his own clothes. The moonlight was kind to Zero too, playing on the silver strands of his hair, lighting the smooth skin on his muscled frame, granting those beloved amethyst eyes a soft, ethereal radiance.

"You're beautiful," Kaname whispered, trailing reverent fingertips along Zero's chest, enjoying the hard muscles shifting under his touch. Lightly, he brushed a fingertip over a stiffened nipple and heard Zero gasp. Kaname pushed himself up onto one elbow and coaxed the hunter to lean down, allowing his lips to close around the same bud. A gentle pressure tugged it into his mouth and Zero shuddered as the tip of a skillful tongue started its teasing dance. He tried to resist as best he could, supporting himself with both elbows on either side of the pureblood's head, but the teasing was too much. With a groan, he surrendered and lowered himself onto Kaname. The pureblood obliged with a softly triumphant laugh that made Zero's face burn, and a hard suck that had him crying out in pleasure.

"You're going to pay for that," Zero gasped when Kaname finally released him. The threat was somewhat negated by the tremor running through his voice. Kaname merely lifted an eyebrow as he surveyed the swollen nipples in front of him with satisfaction.

"Oh?" he asked innocently. Zero nodded grimly.

"Oh yes," he promised before looking around. Damn - he needed lube. Kaname saw his gaze and smiled. The top drawer of his bedside table slid open and a small object soared out, landing neatly in Zero's hand. He chuckled, shaking his head.

"You think of everything," he said wryly, unscrewing the tube and squeezing some of the clear gel onto his fingers. He remembered what to do now, having read up enough on this topic. He just needed to find out if it was really as good as those 'experts' claimed it was.

"Ready?" he asked quietly. Kaname nodded and bent his legs, obligingly spreading them apart. Zero bent his head and squinted, gingerly spreading the gel around tender, puckered skin. He wasn't going to insult Kaname's eagerness by asking 'Are you sure' since the pureblood had already made that abundantly clear. And then some.

Kaname arched his back with a soft gasp as Zero pushed in a gel slicked finger. He paused once the first knuckle had gone in. It wouldn't hurt at this point, but he paused anyway. A whisper of uncertainty cut through his confidence and Zero looked up to find Kaname's wide eyes on him. How could the pureblood let this be done to him? Just the thought of inserting his own finger into himself was a disturbing idea to Zero. It was a place where something came _out_, for Pete's sake!

With an effort, he forced his thoughts to stop before Kaname sensed his agitation.

"How does it feel?" he asked instead. Kaname wriggled his hips a little.

"Good," he whispered breathlessly. "D-deeper, please..."

Zero swallowed. He forced himself to move, pushing the rest of his finger in until it could go no further. A big part of his squeamishness was due to the fact that he kept expecting his finger to come up against an obstruction – he pointedly avoided putting a name to that 'obstruction' - but there was none. The only thing that stopped him from going deeper was the length of his own finger.

_It seems Kaname has excellent bowel habits._

Well, that's good, isn't it? whispered the devious voice with a giggle. Voyeur! Zero hissed at it. He had grown somewhat used to that annoying presence by now, but he felt as if he were making love to Kaname with an observer looking on.

Oh, carry on! Don't mind me, chirped the voice happily. Zero ignored it in favour of sliding his finger in and out of Kaname. Despite his trepidation, he found he enjoyed seeing the pleasure on Kaname's face. When a shaky moan escaped those lips, Zero found himself greedy for more. He added a second finger and blinked when Kaname grimaced briefly.

"Sorry," Zero whispered, his hand stilling. Kaname's hand clutched at his arm, the pain was already fading away.

"No – again," he gasped out. Zero obeyed, sliding his fingers in and out of that incredibly tight opening. Kaname was all hot, tight silk. Incredibly warm, unbelievably tight. Zero immediately began wondering what it would feel like to have another part of him - the one that was throbbing very palpably - enjoy this heat instead.

Carry on and you'll know soon enough, promised the voice. The realisation that it was right sent a rush of arousal sweeping through Zero. He took a deep breath and continued stroking Kaname. The pale thighs quivered as he pushed his fingers in deep, then drew them almost completely out before going back again. After half a dozen movements, Zero finally remembered something else he had to do. He scissored his fingers tentatively, offering a gentle stretch, hushing that other part of his body that was begging to participate.

When Kaname clutched at his arm, Zero bent down to kiss him.

"You're doing great," he praised.

"You sound so experienced," Kaname praised in return, only half teasing. Zero quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Are you sure?" he asked dryly. "I've never done it this way with - " he broke off with a silent groan, darting a guilty look at Kaname. To his surprise, the pureblood only smiled at him.

"I'm glad," he whispered. Zero smiled back.

"Me too," he whispered. "Glad that I have something new to offer you."

When the dark eyes brimmed again, Zero felt his own eyes smart. He straightened up and squeezed more gel onto his fingers. He needed to use three fingers to ensure that Kaname was well stretched. This time, no pain showed on that beautiful face. Zero paused all the same, unsure if Kaname was just controlling himself.

"Are you OK?" he asked. Kaname nodded eagerly. Pureblood psychology and his own eagerness worked in his favour. Zero could have stretched him faster and harder at this point and Kaname would have enjoyed it all the same.

"I'm fine, Zero. It feels good," he murmured. Zero grinned in relief, pushing all three fingers inside with a harder thrust. To both their surprises, a wanton sound escaped Kaname's lips at that swift entry. Cheeks flushing with embarrassment, he clapped one hand to his mouth. That sound had endorsed his words like nothing else could have. A surprised chuckle from Zero had Kaname blushing harder and a repeat of that same swift motion had him gasping out another moan.

Zero's enthusiasm grew in spades. Kaname was obviously enjoying himself and that just made the whole experience so much more pleasurable for him as well. Zero gave himself up to the moment, relishing the tight, hot channel squeezing his fingers, drinking in the sheer pleasure stamped on Kaname's flushed features. The sight of him squirming and panting on the sheets with his damp body glowing under the moonlight was enough to make Zero groan with anticipation, desire thickening and warming his blood.

"Ze-Zero, please," Kaname pleaded. He clutched at Zero's broad shoulders, trying to pull him closer. He hadn't realised how sensitive his insides were and feared he might actually climax before being claimed. That would be nothing short of mortifying!

"Enough. I – I want you inside me," he panted. Zero grinned and withdrew his sticky fingers. He looked at them curiously and to Kaname's consternation, brought them up to his nose. To the pureblood's relief, Zero merely uttered a 'hmmm' before reaching for the gel again. He spread more cool liquid onto his erection and shifted closer. Kaname's breath lodged in his throat when he felt strong hands sliding under his thighs, lifting and spreading them. This was the moment he had been waiting for. This was the moment when he would finally know what it felt like to belong, body and soul to the one he loved.

Zero looked at him and was instantly lost. Kaname looked so darned _beddable_ right now, dark hair tumbling over his shoulders, eyes wide with desire, face flushed with need, body moist and ready, pale slender legs bent at the knees and spread invitingly wide – Zero had to close his eyes to force a measure of control on himself. He had never before taken Yuuki before making sure he was in control of his body and before making sure she was ready for him. He wasn't about to do any different with Kaname. The pureblood deserved the same concern, the same regard. In fact, he deserved... _more_.

More care? And why is that? asked the voice slyly. Flustered, Zero tried to justify his thoughts. Well, this was Kaname's first time. Zero just wanted to be careful, that was all. He wanted it to be good for Kaname. That was all. Right, muttered the voice, sounding as if it had given up on him altogether. Zero ignored it. He took a deep breath and shifted closer. Kaname's breath hitched as something hard and blunt probed intimately at him. Instinctively, he lifted his legs higher and hugged Zero's hips with his knees.

"I can guess what - unh!"

Zero had given another push. He was in, but just barely. Kaname was... oh God, he was hot - tight - _squeezingly_ tight. Zero shuddered and gave another push. Kaname gasped. He ran his trembling hands up the hunter's arms and cupped his face.

"Kiss me, Zero," he urged. "Fill me."

Zero lowered himself, indulging Kaname in a swift kiss before straightening up again. He wanted to see how the pureblood looked as he claimed him. He jerked his hips forward and almost lost himself when Kaname's tight heat yanked at the tenuous threads of his control. Zero gritted his teeth, his chest heaving with effort. No. Go slow. It was worth it to see those eyes widen in wonder and knowledge, to see those lips part in a gasp of joy, to see pleasure in those eyes. Zero didn't want a rushed blur of emotions on that flushed, sweetly expectant face. He wanted to see each individual expression, he wanted to know how each of his movements would affect his lover.

"Zero," Kaname panted. "I can - you don't have - I can, I - I want...!"

Kaname could have cringed at such inarticulateness but that would come later. Much later.

"Can't," gasped Zero in return. "Hot, too tight – can't - don't want - hurt -"

Well, it helped that they were both equally inarticulate, perhaps they could cringe together later. Kaname's random thought evaporated when Zero inched forward again. The stretch was starting to burn, but Kaname had waited for this for so long, pain was the last thing on his mind. All he wanted was Zero. All of him. As many inches as he had and with that firm round head buried so deep inside him, neither of them would ever be able to pull it out again.

Kaname gave a frustrated sob, tugging at the hunter's strong hips with his knees, pulling at his shoulders.

"Inside," he panted. "Inside...!"

Zero thinned his lips and shook his head at Kaname who looked dismayed. Was Zero still going to torment them both with his misguided sense of chivalry? Kaname had had _enough_. He crossed his ankles behind Zero's back, determined to bring him closer. There was no sense of being invaded, no fear of submission, no feeling of uncertainty. Kaname's body was screaming at him to just hurry up and complete the joining already.

Zero groaned again, his back bowing in an effort to hang on onto this control. Kaname would have none of it. He tugged insistently at Zero's hips again. With a deep groan that sounded as if he was in pain, Zero surged forward with a thrust strong enough to seat him completely inside Kaname.

Both of them cried out at once, lost in the incredible sensations of a rigid, velvet coated length delving deeply into tight, moist heat. It stole their breaths away and left them frozen to the spot with Zero's hips pressed up against Kaname's bottom. Damp chests heaved against each other's, eyes squeezing shut. Kaname was trembling at that sudden, amazing stretch while Zero was shuddering at the tightness that engulfed him. He fell forward and buried his face in his lover's neck, arms sliding underneath the pureblood to hold him closer.

_Stay still, Kaname. Oh God, please stay still. I - I just need a moment..._

It had been too long. Zero had forgotten what it had felt like, the sheer bliss of driving himself into a willing body that squeezed and rippled around him. It had been too _darned_ long.

Kaname didn't move a muscle, he couldn't. He was breathing in hitching pants, absorbing the incredible feeling of being intimately joined with the one he loved, savouring the moment of finally belonging to someone, thrilling to the stretch that spoke eloquently of Zero's considerable size.

"Hey, you OK?" came the muffled whisper at his neck. Kaname shifted his hips experimentally. No pain, no discomfort. Just an amazing sensation of being filled, of being warmed, of being... completed. Was this what Yuuki felt each time? This incredible feeling of connectedness to Zero, of belonging to him, of sheltering him? Because Kaname would _never_ give this up. He would never give up the privilege of feeling Zero's warm weight pressing down on him, of feeling both protected and wanted and loved.

"No," Kaname whispered, praying he wouldn't sniffle. "No, I'm not OK."

Zero's head jerked up so fast his forehead almost hit Kaname's chin. He scanned the pureblood's face with worried eyes.

"Why? Are you hurt? Did I go too fast? You said -"

He tried to wriggle backwards, but the long legs around his waist stopped him. Zero stared at Kaname and finally realised he was smiling.

"Not OK, Zero," the pureblood whispered mischievously. "But incredibly and wonderfully happy!"

He laughed as Zero's mouth fell open before he frowned, glared and kissed Kaname in rapid succession.

"So, what's next?" Kaname whispered breathlessly against Zero's lips, wriggling his hips meaningfully. Zero chuckled and raised up a little, supporting his weight on his elbows. He pulled his hips back, making both of them shudder at the sensation. Zero inhaled and rocked his hips forward again. A hard and fast motion that seated himself satisfyingly deep once more. They both groaned in unison. Zero did it again, pulling almost completely out before pushing forward again. This time, Kaname met him halfway with his hips raised. The simple actions quickly became too much, their movements gaining speed and strength. Thinking of going slow was a much too hard process for them to sustain. Feeling took much less effort.

All Kaname could do was feel as he clutched wildly at Zero's shoulders, his fingers slipping on the sweat slicked skin, hips thrusting against the hunter's again and again. The familiar cries were falling from his lips and he was past caring that they would soon increase in both volume and pitch. Zero was equally lost. All he could do was feel as he kept his fingers hooked around Kaname's shoulders from underneath to anchor him while he rocked into him again and again, seating himself deeper and deeper with each thrust, praying he would last long enough to secure Kaname's bliss first.

Kaname couldn't get enough. He shifted his legs wider and the next time Zero drove into him, Kaname let out a scream of shocked delight.

"Zero!" he cried out, desperate to feel that startling, electrifying jolt again. His eyes rolled to the back of his head as Zero continued thrusting into him. Each movement hit something that made Kaname's body spasm with unexpected bliss. All of a sudden, he found himself swept to the very edge of what promised to be an explosive release. He dug his nails into Zero's biceps and tried desperately to hold on, but it was too much.

Kaname came with a strength that shocked them both. The violent shudders ripping through his body pulled a prolonged scream from his throat, far louder than any he had ever uttered. He tipped his head back, screaming with abandon as his body jerked of its own accord, his seed splattering both their bodies.

Zero growled at the sound and surrendered the last shreds of his control. Kaname's magnificent scream combined with the incredible sensation of his wildly convulsing body both inside and out threw Zero right over the edge. He cried out in turn, his body jerking with the force of his orgasm as it emptied itself deep inside Kaname. They finally collapsed onto the bed, trembling and shaking in each other's arms, Kaname still uttering soft cries of bliss.

Eventually, Zero blinked open his eyes. While utterly sublime and gorgeously satisfying, it wasn't quite the gentle seduction he had planned for Kaname. He raised his head with an effort, gazing down at the beautiful, flushed face below his. Kaname looked as if he had blissfully passed out. It was a sight that reassured Zero more than he wanted to admit. He raised himself further on shaking arms and grimaced at the sticky feel of their bodies squelching apart.

"You all right?" he asked anyway. Kaname's eyes slowly blinked open to reveal dazed chocolate depths.

"I don't know," he whispered, a sudden twinkle rendering his eyes mischievous. "Perhaps if you made love to me again?"

Zero grinned and collapsed onto Kaname for the second time, ignoring the indignant gasp and even louder squelch that followed.

"Practice makes perfect, you mean?" he mumbled tiredly. He felt replete, boneless and much too satisfied to do anything about the incoherent gurgles going on inside his head.

"Uh-huh."

Zero moved higher up and felt himself slide out of Kaname, pulling a shiver from both of them. He kissed the pureblood gently.

"In a while, all right?" he suggested with a deprecating smile. "I uh, can't feel my legs right now."

Kaname's laugh was pure joy even though the strange sensation of something warm trickling out from between his legs was a new one. He no longer had to wonder what love making felt like. He knew now. He knew it intimately. He knew that with the person you loved, it was the most wonderful experience in the world, well worth the years and years of waiting. Well worth every single moment of heartbreak and loneliness.

"I love you, Zero," Kaname choked out. Yuuki had been incredibly lucky to have Zero love her and now at long last, it was his turn. He tried to contain the happiness he felt at the thought, but it kept swelling and swelling until it was just too big for him to keep inside. Zero shook his head as the tears spilled over, a tender smile playing on his lips at the pureblood's predictable reaction. Zero's first time with Yuuki had ended in bliss and giggles, but his first time with Kaname ended in tears instead. Still, who was to say that one experience was less satisfying than the other?

Zero sat up and pulled his sniffling lover into his arms.

"Let me hold you first," he whispered. Kaname nodded and gave himself up to the most secure feeling in the world - that of being held in Zero's arms.

_Don't let go, Zero. It's my turn so please... don't let go._

- Chapter End -


	28. Chapter 28: The Revelation

**Author Notes:** Hello and thank you once again for your marvellous reviews! We are nearing the end of this story, just two more chapters to go. My apologies for making Kaname more and more uke-like. I hope he's still endearing to read _*guilty smile* _Enjoy this chapter!

Each time I write of a certain 'position' I have to mention the great **Blackened Wing** for immortalising it in her **Crimson Door** and other stories :D

- Chapter Start -

To Zero's relief, there were no heartrending sobs this time. There was just a long series of soft sniffles and warm hitching breaths muffled against his shoulder and the tickling sensation of droplets sliding down his chest. There was just a trembling creature cuddled up on his lap with the softest of sweat dampened skin and the silkiest of bed tousled hair.

Oh, isn't he the _sweetest_ thing ever? simpered the voice in Zero's head, sounding as if it were patting Kaname on the shoulder with tiny, adoring hands. Zero privately agreed but he didn't reply. Although he was quite content at first to sit cross legged on the bed with his arms around Kaname and one hand stroking that slender back, he felt progressively less confident as the minutes ticked by.

"Shush, that's enough," he eventually said and sighed when Kaname didn't move.

"Hey, surely it wasn't _that_ bad?" he teased next. That made Kaname lift his head. He saw the half smile on his lover's lips and thrilled to the realisation that they truly _were_ lovers now, in every sense of the word.

"If that's bad, Zero," he replied huskily. "I don't think I can survive any improvement!"

Zero's smile widened. He used his thumbs to gently wipe away the moisture from Kaname's cheeks before cupping that perfect face.

"Is that a challenge?" he asked wryly. Kaname immediately sat up straighter, his sparkling eyes belying his demure smile.

"That depends. How are your legs feeling now?" he asked with an admirable attempt at nonchalance.

"Slowly growing numb from having someone sit on one of them," Zero returned solemnly.

Kaname quickly scrambled off, cheeks warming at the deep chuckle that followed. He felt his buttocks slide against some wetness and looked down to see moonlight reflecting off a long, moist smear on the strong thigh he had been perched on. Kaname's eyes darted up to Zero's face, cheeks going from warm to hot in an instant, mouth opening in an 'o' of dismay.

"Excuse me!" he blurted out. Zero only quirked an eyebrow at him and reached out to snag the tissue box on the nightstand.

"Why are you apologising?" he asked with a straight face as he wiped the residue off his thigh. "I believe that came from me."

Zero couldn't believe he had actually said that with a straight face. The voice in his head blushed hotly - Zero felt a tiny implosion of heat somewhere behind his right eye - and Kaname's adorable 'o' of dismay turned into an 'O' of outright embarrassment. The pureblood hoped his fiery blush didn't show up in the moonlight. He closed and opened and closed his mouth again without any sound coming out. The legendary Kuran eloquence had fled off into the night, as speechless and red cheeked as he was.

"Uhm, right," he finally mumbled.

_This is going to be a regular occurrence so deal with it. Or just suggest using a condom next time._

But Kaname didn't want Zero to use one. He didn't want anything between them when they made love. He wanted Zero to release inside him. He wanted to feel the hunter's warmth and be marked as _his_.

"And yours is all over us," Zero continued, his tone less assertive now. He was starting to blush in spite of himself. Still, it was fun to tease this enticing creature who was a world away from the composed and self assured pureblood he had known for so long.

Kaname's shoulder lifted deprecatingly as he shot a furtive glance at the tissue box lying nearby. He could feel Zero's passion still slowly leaking from him.

"Just uhm, don't spill so much next time," he mumbled.

Oh, isn't he just the most _adorable_ thing ever! trilled the voice rapturously, in full squealing and cheek pinching mode. Zero didn't hear a word this time. Kaname's embarrassed mumble had brought forth the sharp ache of a memory that was more than twenty years old, yet as clear as if it had only happened yesterday. His wedding night with Yuuki and her innocent remark that had made him blush that night.

Kaname stared as Zero's eyes unfocused, lips twisted in a strangely bittersweet smile.

"Did I say something wrong?" he asked worriedly. Zero blinked and then he shook his head.

"No, you didn't," he said huskily. "It's just that... never mind, I'll uhm, try not to."

Was that even possible? Well, perhaps if he made love to Kaname for the third time tonight. Zero's gaze rested assessingly on the naked form kneeling in front of him, the moonlight playing up its clean, slender lines. The sight of the rapidly firming length lying against one creamy thigh caught Zero's attention and stirred his blood. Kaname swallowed when the amethyst eyes flicked up and caught his gaze. His hunter wanted him again... and Kaname had no intention of refusing.

"Come here," Zero growled. He shifted onto his knees and tugged at Kaname's arm, pulling him closer.

"Sit on me."

Never before had those three words sound so erotic to Kaname. He was eager to have Zero claim him again and the change of position was an additional delight. Shifting closer, he half straddled Zero with his long legs on either side of the hunter's waist. Holding onto the muscled shoulders, Kaname slowly raised himself. Zero held his own arousal upright in one hand, using his other to shift one of Kaname's thighs until the pureblood was perfectly positioned over his flushed, round head. Kaname then linked his fingers behind Zero's back and looked down into those hungry amethyst eyes. His pureblood healing had left his body free of any lingering aches and he was longing to take his lover inside him again. Slowly, he lowered his head and pressed a tender kiss on the hunter's lips.

_I'm completely yours, Zero. Completely._

Zero kissed him back and smiled when Kaname raised his head.

"You're still moist," he stated meaningfully. He rubbed against Kaname's sensitive opening and the pureblood tipped his head back with a soft cry. He sank down and took Zero's firm head into himself, thrilling as the hunter's breathing turned instantly harsh. There was no need for additional lubricant this time for either one of them. Kaname discovered that whatever was left of Zero's spent passion inside him was more than enough to ease their joining. He looked down and saw the same wonder and pleasure he felt reflected in Zero's eyes. Kaname dropped himself lower... and lower... and lower still. The stretch was still there but in Kaname's mind, it meant that he was being filled and completed.

"Oh God, Kaname," Zero whispered, eyes fluttering close as he was torturously sheathed inch by inch. And just like that, Kaname's vision blurred. He bit his lip and blinked the moisture away, not wanting to lose even a second of seeing Zero lost in wonder.

"You feel so perfect, you _are_ perfect," Zero praised, his voice sounding ragged. Kaname could feel his heart thudding loud and fast, the same as his own. With a tiny sob, he pushed down the rest of the way and forced Zero completely into him in one long, continuous slide. They clutched each other and shuddered, but otherwise stayed still.

"I love you," Kaname whispered. Zero cupped his face with his hands again.

"Thank you," he whispered. Kaname smiled tremulously and tilted his head to the left.

"Bite me, Zero?" he requested, his voice shaking. "I need to feel you feeding from me."

It was a request Zero was only too happy to comply with. He slid his arms around the pureblood and pulled him close. They were now as physically close as possible except for one more thing. Zero licked the sweet tasting sweat from the patch of fluttering skin at Kaname's neck and tenderly claimed him. The soft cry that greeted his fangs splintered his control. With a groan, Zero dug his fangs in deeper and thrust upward with his hips at the same time. Kaname convulsed in his arms, almost sobbing at the intense pleasure of double penetration. Zero growled his approval. He swallowed a few mouthfuls of blood, spreading his thighs apart at the same time to open Kaname more fully to him. Slowly, he pushed his fangs deeper into Kaname's neck and echoed the subtle movement with an upward shift of his hips. Kaname's shuddering gasp and the way his arms tightened around his neck told Zero he had found the right spot.

They didn't move much on the bed, their arms were too tightly wrapped around each other for that. But each movement Zero made was enough. To Kaname whose entire body was singing with pleasure from being bitten and claimed simultaneously, it was _more_ than enough. Each tiny shift of Zero's fangs sent delightful tingles rippling into Kaname's bloodstream that spread throughout his body with each pounding heartbeat. Each minute thrust of Zero's hips rubbed the head of his arousal against an ultra sensitive spot inside Kaname that sent wave after wave of electrifying pleasure up his spine, enriching the shudders already wracking his body. It was too much, having Zero claim his neck and his body at the same time. It was _way_ too much pleasure. Kaname was starting to sob with the utter bliss of it all. His stomach was already tied in knots and sexual tension was coiled so tightly inside him that the inevitable explosion was going to be nothing short of spectacular. Kaname was going to erupt again and soon.

Zero himself was struggling to hold out. Kaname's body fitted so tightly over his own but now he also had to contend with the exotic and powerful blood he had just imbibed. It sharpened his senses and amplified _everything_ he was already feeling. With his heightened hearing, the desperate rasp of Kaname's hitching breaths was unmistakable. The divine blood pulsing into his mouth smelled extra sweet when breathed in together with the scent of their earlier passion and perspiration. Even the clear liquid leaking rapidly from Kaname's arousal that was trapped between their bodies smelled intoxicating. Zero glanced down distractedly and tried to free one hand in order to grip that rigid length. The tingles at the base of his spine told him he was dangerously close to his own release and he wanted Kaname to come with him. Zero didn't realise that the choked out sobs from the pureblood had already changed in both pitch and volume. He found himself staring bemusedly down at Kaname's erection as it twitched and pumped creamy fluid in generous spurts. Then he realised his ears were ringing with delightfully ragged screams and finally caught onto the fact that he didn't need to hold back any longer.

With a triumphant groan, Zero slid his fangs free and drove them into Kaname's neck again and again. With each plunge, he thrust his hips upwards sharply until he finally exploded deep inside the screaming, writhing body on his lap. They held on tightly to each other, bucking in each other's arms until the pounding waves of orgasm finally faded and they found themselves tangled together on the bed. Zero was still deeply buried inside Kaname who was sprawled on his chest, trembling and uttering blissful little cries against his shoulder. It was a few minutes later after their heartbeats had slowed down that Zero heard the sleepily voiced words of love. He gave a bittersweet smile.

"I know, Kaname," he whispered. "I know."

Zero held the drowsy pureblood as tightly as his trembling arms would allow. He would never get tired of making love to this utterly enchanting creature. Kaname may be the one trapped in his embrace right now but Zero knew he was the one who was well and truly caught.

- o -

Zero had applied for two days' leave to follow that weekend. He ended up spending all four days at Kaname's apartment. It was the best time of the pureblood's life as the days and nights passed in an ecstatic blend of love making, showering, biting, sleeping and eating. In every possible combination and order. There were times when Kaname fell asleep under Zero as soon as the main shudders of an shattering orgasm faded and other times when Zero got off the bed only to wobble unsteadily on his feet after another intense bout of love making. Neither of them complained.

They spent almost every waking minute with each other, either making love or eating or watching TV or relaxing in the hot tub which inevitably led to more love making sessions. During one rather enthusiastic session, Kaname sustained bruises on his back while at another time, Zero got them on his knees. Neither minded too much since Kaname healed almost instantly and happily ensured Zero did too with another offer of his blood. By the second day, they ran out of clean bedsheets and switched their action to the bathroom. Zero pressed Kaname against the shower stall tiles and claimed him passionately while the sound of the running water drowned out the pureblood's ecstatic cries.

When real life finally intruded in the form for a hunter mission for Zero, Kaname went back to his office looking radiantly happy and already eagerly anticipating the next weekend.

- o -

Unfortunately, it didn't quite happen as planned. Zero's children came back to Cross Academy to spend some time with him. Tomi accompanied Yuko as usual while Hinata came with Ichiru. Kaname hid his disappointment as well as he could. He was genuinely happy over Yuko's pregnancy and congratulated her with an affectionate kiss on her cheek. Then he shook a proudly beaming Tomi's hand before giving him a lecture that was similar to Zero's. The younger vampire was ecstatic to hear it and promised to be a doting father to the point of spoiling his child. Kaname also congratulated Ichiru and Hinata on their engagement and enquired about their plans for a wedding. In short, he played the part of loving uncle to perfection.

Only this time, it wasn't good enough.

Yuko had started to suffer from morning sickness and ate very little at mealtimes, despite her father's excellent cooking. Without food to distract her, she was more observant than usual. Zero sat in his usual seat at the head of the table with Kaname on his right. Yuko sat directly opposite the pureblood and noticed the stolen glances and brief touches between the two males. Soon, she found herself interpreting the meaning behind casual words and secretive smiles. It wasn't difficult for her to pinpoint the possible reason especially after she recalled how Kaname had stared so longingly at her father a while back.

Ichiru, Hinata and Isamu left soon after dinner, but Yuko wanted to spend the night in her old home. Tomi was as usual only too happy to indulge her. Yuko had lost a little weight due to her morning sickness and her worried husband hoped that Zero's cooking skills would tempt her appetite back.

"Papa?"

Zero was seated at the kitchen table, sipping his usual after dinner tea. Kaname had gone to his room to shower.

"Yuko, I thought you were following Tomi to town?" he asked. Yuko smiled and shook her head.

"I've had enough travelling for one day," she declared and waved Zero back when he started to get up.

"I'll make my own tea. You just sit right there."

Half a minute later, Yuko sat next to her father with a steaming mug of green tea.

"How are you, papa?" she asked softly. Zero smiled at her.

"I should ask you that, you hardly ate anything earlier," he chided gently. Yuko smiled.

"The doctor said it's normal," she reassured him. "Just give me a couple more months, I'll be eating everything in sight!"

Then she sobered up and fixed him with a concerned gaze.

"Truly papa, how are you doing?"

Zero's smile was softer. It held a hint of happiness as well as sadness and guilt.

"I'm coping," he said quietly and knew it was a lie. That was what a grieving widower would say but he wasn't really that, was he? He looked down at his tea and grimaced. Yuko eyed him thoughtfully.

"I can see that," she said quietly. Zero stared at her, feeling somehow tense. Yuko had been observant even as a child. It made him wonder if he and Kaname hadn't been as discreet as they should have. He knew his gaze had wandered to the pureblood and lingered on him more than once during dinner. Kaname had done the same and then there was the moment when the pureblood had reached for his hand under the table...

"Yuko, what do you -" Zero began only to break off when he sensed Kaname approaching the kitchen. The pureblood appeared a moment later, dressed in a new T-shirt of a rich brown shade, paired with casual cream slacks. With his hair dampened from the shower and his face lightly flushed from the hot water, he looked gorgeous. They hadn't had the chance to make love for the past two days since Kaname had worked late and then Zero's children had arrived. The latter couldn't help the sudden flare of hunger in his body as his eyes raked Kaname from head to foot. Kaname froze for a second, his eyes widening. Then he forced himself to move to the counter to take down a mug. Zero dragged his gaze back to Yuko only to see her staring at her oji-san with that tiny frown between her eyebrows, the one that always appeared when she was trying to puzzle out something.

But nothing more was said.

- o -

Two weeks later, Yuko called Zero to say she was coming for dinner the following weekend and begged her father to cook some of her favourite dishes. He promised to do and a delighted Yuko declared she would get her brothers to come down as well. When Zero broke the news to Kaname over a lazy breakfast, he half expected him to be disappointed but the pureblood looked thoughtful instead.

"I think we should tell them," he said quietly. Zero put down his coffee cup abruptly.

"Tell them what?" he asked.

"That we're lovers," Kaname replied. Zero saw the pride in his eyes and heard it echoed in his voice. He would have smiled if not for the worry suddenly twisting in his stomach.

"No, it's too soon," he said, frowning. "I don't know how they'll take it."

Kaname was undeterred. He reached for Zero's hand and lifted it to his lips, his eyes never leaving the hunter's.

"They love you and so do I. I'm sure they won't begrudge us our happiness," he assured.

"I don't know, Kaname."

Zero looked as troubled as he felt. He was fine with keeping this whole thing under wraps. He had already known what a relationship with a pureblood would mean and to be honest, he didn't really mind the secrecy. Zero had always been a private person even with Yuuki. They had lived a quiet life for the most part and both were perfectly content with it. Neither of them had felt the need to join the giddy social whirl other couples their age indulged in. A quiet dinner spent at Cross Academy with their children and their late adopted father and Zero's late sensei meant more to them than any public dinner ever could. Kaname was also careful to ensure that very few people from his social circle knew Yuuki was his younger sister. It would have rendered her vulnerable to his enemies since she was a human.

In truth, Kaname was also worried about what Zero's children would think of his relationship with their father, but a part of him still wanted them to know. He wanted to be himself and not keep up pretences, which he found awkward and irksome, especially around people he considered his family. At the last family dinner, Isamu's innocent question of 'What have you and oji-san been doing in town last weekend, papa?' had been enough to make Zero almost choke. Ichiru's teasing comment a few minutes later of 'You look great, oji-san! Dare we hope you've embarked on a new love affair then?' had made Kaname blush despite his best efforts. Yuko's strangely observant gaze at the two of them in the kitchen later had only made things worse.

"Zero, I don't want to pretend anymore," Kaname said. "I've pretended for more than twenty years. I don't want to hide the truth. Not from you and not from your family."

Zero gave a crooked smile.

"They're your family too, Kaname," he murmured. He reached out to gently tuck a lock of silky brown hair behind a perfectly shaped ear. Kaname turned his head to press a kiss to Zero's palm.

"Then I want them to know that I love you," he whispered with an apologetic look. "I'm sorry. Even if you don't want to hear it, I have to say it. I _want_ to say it."

Zero closed his eyes for a moment, his smile turning bittersweet.

"I know how you feel, Kaname," he said. At the pureblood's look of surprise, Zero gave him a reproving look.

"I fell in love with Yuuki before she fell in love with me," he admitted freely. He could speak about her more easily now. Perhaps he was meant to be with Kaname, for Zero couldn't think of anyone else who would want his love and yet be able to smile when he spoke of his late wife. Kaname nodded. He wasn't all that surprised. Yuuki had been very innocent and child-like. He suspected she didn't even know she was in love with Zero until the day he had forced her to choose between them.

"I would tell her almost every day that I loved her even when she apologised for not being able to say the same thing back in return," Zero continued, his solemn gaze holding Kaname captive. "She didn't want to lie to me. She felt it was unfair to receive my love when she thought of me as an older brother, but I didn't mind at all. I was so happy she knew I loved her after I'd kept it inside me for so long, thinking I didn't have a future, fearing she would reject me or worse, not know how to reject me."

Zero smiled at Kaname, his throat tight. He reached for the pureblood's hand and squeezed it softly.

"So I do know how you feel, Kaname," he said softly. "And it's all right. You can tell me that as often as you like. And know that I deeply appreciate it each time."

Kaname stared at him, eyes wide with wonder. Each time he thought Zero couldn't possibly get more perfect than he already was, the hunter would surprise him. Always.

"I love you, Zero," he choked out. "I really do."

He truly didn't mind saying it. It was liberating to give voice to something kept hidden for so long, it almost drove him mad with longing. Zero smiled again. He stood up and went over to Kaname, pulling the pureblood up from the chair and into a hug.

"I know you do," he murmured against Kaname's lips. "And I hope you won't be the only one saying that all the time."

Tears of gratitude welled up in Kaname's eyes. He had thought that Zero's honesty would perhaps hurt, but it didn't. Not really. Because there were no secrets between them now and Kaname infinitely preferred that to half truths, no matter how sweet they might sound.

_It's OK, Zero. Even if you don't love me, you've already made me the happiest man on earth._

- o -

When next weekend arrived, Kaname was a nervous wreck and had almost succeeded in making Zero the same. The hunter knew he didn't need his children's permission to do anything, but somehow... he felt he did. He had never loved anyone else except Yuuki and their children knew it. Memories from their past would return to haunt Zero and although they were sweet and romantic, some even humorous, they made him wince.

Whenever Yuko and the twins caught him kissing Yuuki or hugging her from behind or whispering sweet nothings in her ear, they would inevitably tell their parents to go to their bedroom (since they already _had_ a room) or when they were younger, the twins would react with sounds of mock disgust. Later on, Yuko would sigh and hope that Tomi would prove as devoted to her as her papa was to her mama. Each of those memories had filled Zero with pride and joy then... but now he was conscious of shame. It wasn't really because he thought himself unworthy of love, but because he still felt it was too soon to get involved with someone else, especially a someone who wasn't a stranger to his children.

Lunch seemed quieter than usual. Later on, Kaname would realise that it was because Ichiru was annoyed over his lover's tiff with Hinata and that Isamu was grumpy after failing his first job interview and that Yuko was more interested in tucking into her favourite dishes than talking. Her appetite had finally started to improve and Tomi was equally occupied in keeping her plate filled. Nevertheless, the lack of usually exuberant dinner conversation affected Kaname's mood. Normally, he would have stepped in with pleasant anecdotes to fill the gaps, but his mind had gone distressingly blank. The realisation crumbled his fragile confidence and left him worried to the point where he could no longer eat or think of anything to say. His nervous glances at Zero showed that the hunter also seemed tense, staring down at his plate when he wasn't talking.

By the time the rather subdued meal was over, Kaname was a veritable bundle of nerves. He felt torn between wanting Zero's children to know and wanting to break down in the privacy of his room. Preferably in Zero's arms. Instead, he found himself seated in the living room with the four young adults as Zero washed up in the kitchen. The hunter insisted it was faster if he did the dishes himself and promised to bring everyone tea once he was done. He didn't realise that all hell would break loose just ten minutes later.

When the sound of raised voices reached Zero's ears, he put down the plate he was drying. It actually took him a few seconds to realise what the sound was since no one had raised their voice in anger in his home for quite a few years now. With the dish towel still hanging from his fingers, he strode out of the kitchen. The dining area overlooked the living room and he stood rooted to the spot at what he saw. Instead of sitting around calmly watching TV, everyone was on their feet and staring at Kaname who looked like a thief who had been cornered. Ichiru and Isamu looked particularly furious as they glared at their uncle.

"You and papa are _lovers?_" asked Isamu, looking both bewildered and angry.

"Yes. We are," Kaname said quietly. It would have gone down much, much better if he had put on the mask of implacable calm and used the voice of complete authority, the combination which never failed to send his employees scurrying to do his bidding. The barely hidden uncertainty lurking in his eyes was one Zero's children had never seen or heard before. Coupled with the bombshell he had just dropped on them, it brought the opposite reaction instead.

"You're joking, oji-san," Ichiru accused flatly. "It's not funny. You of all people should know that!"

"I'm not joking," Kaname protested. It was another mistake. He should have stated it as an irrefutable fact so that it would never be challenged. After all, he was used to the highest form of respect from his business associates and employees. Unfortunately, he was equally used to the casual familiarity with which Zero's children treated him, having insisted upon it years ago. It now left him vulnerable to their disbelieving looks and hurtful words.

"So it's true then?" Yuko asked softly. She darted a glance at her husband beside her. Tomi was staring speechlessly at Kaname, his blue eyes round with shock.

"How dare you – what about mama?" Ichiru demanded. It was obvious he considered it a betrayal to his mother's memory. Kaname almost blanched.

"Ichiru! Wait a minute," Yuko said sharply. Ichiru gave a rude snort and crossed his arms across his chest.

"Why should I wait?" he snarled. "Since when, oji-san? Since when have you seduced papa?"

Kaname's eyes widened in distress.

_Seduced... never!_

"How could you do this?" Isamu cried. "Papa loved mama! He's never even looked at another woman! How could you do this to him?"

"No! I never... I - " Kaname started. His heart was pounding painfully inside his chest, spreading nothing but bewilderment and pain.

_Why is this happening? Why are they looking at me like this?_

"Then what the hell are you playing at!" Ichiru yelled at him, his face now red with anger.

"You're our uncle! You betrayed us!" Isamu added, mirroring his twin's stance.

"That is _enough!_"

Everyone swung around to see Zero standing there with his eyes blazing furiously, the dish towel gripped in one white knuckled fist.

"Ichiru! Isamu! Apologise to Kaname-oji-san immediately!" he ordered.

The twins stared at their father in shock. They hadn't been yelled at in years and even then they had never ever seen him this angry.

"Papa, did you hear what oji-san said?" Ichiru demanded, still sounding outraged. Zero shook his head grimly.

"I don't care. Apologise to your oji-san now! Both of you!" he bit out through tightly clenched teeth.

Ichiru and Isamu were completely stunned. Kaname saw that instead of refuting their words, Zero's demand that they first apologise only confirmed it. Kaname swallowed past a raw throat. His head was reeling and the rest of him a seething mass of white hot pain. He had bungled it up. He should have waited for Zero to come out so that they could say it together. And he was wrong. He shouldn't have insisted on telling them. So this was why Zero had been so reluctant to let his children know – he had known it would tear his family apart.

_I was so happy I thought everyone would see that and understand..._

Half a minute of silence passed, the worst thirty seconds Kaname had ever experienced. It was a thick, heavy silence that seemed entirely made up of burning guilt, stern insistence and betrayed anger. Kaname felt all the emotions closing in on him from all sides, suffocating him, drowning him. He felt like a condemned man.

No. He felt like a scarlet man. If there was ever such a thing.

"Uhm... oji-san?"

Yuko's sweet voice sounded worried and uncertain. It made Kaname want to curl up and die. Yuko had always worshipped the ground he walked on. He had always been her favourite oji-san, but oh God, she must hate him now. She and the twins. Why had Kaname ever thought that his niece and nephews would greet his news with open arms? They had lost their mother less than half a year ago! Of course they would object to anyone in their father's life now. They would see it as an attempt to take Yuuki's place. But because it was _him_, a trusted member of the family, it must look like betrayal of the very worst sort. Their beloved oji-san. Their mother's _brother_.

Kaname couldn't stop heaping guilt onto himself. Why hadn't he seen it that way? He never should have forced Zero's hand. He never should have thought that just because Zero treated him so wonderfully that the rest of his family would automatically do the same. He had no right to demand anything more than what the hunter had already so generously given him.

Kaname forced himself to dig deep, to find strength from goodness only knew where to push down all the hurt and anguish. It was harder than anything he had ever done when he just wanted to bolt and hide somewhere to lick his wounds. Somehow, he managed. Kaname took one more second to erase his face of all emotion and take a deep breath before turning around. It wasn't until he had registered the shocked looks of dismay on their faces that he suddenly realised he hadn't quite succeeded in hiding his emotions, however belatedly. Yuko clapped a hand to her mouth and both the twins' mouths dropped right open.

"Oji-san...!" Yuko whispered. From Tomi there came only a strangled sound of disbelief, his eyes almost popping out of his head at a sight never before imagined.

"Oh man," Ichiru muttered, looking slightly guilty now.

"Oji-san, you - you're crying!" A stunned Isamu stated the obvious. Kaname's hand whipped up to his face to encounter incriminating wetness on his cheeks.

_Oh. Shit. Hell. Could this get anymore embarrassing? _

Kaname's mind was an absolute blank as he stared back at them. It was bad enough that he had shown his weakness to Zero repeatedly, but now he had caused the rest of his family to lose whatever respect they still had for him. He swung around to look at Zero, seeing the grim expression on that beloved face. Kaname barely managed to suppressed the sob rising in his throat. He couldn't, he just _couldn't_ hide the hurt and anguish ripping his heart apart. He thought he would be happy enough once Zero was his lover, but now he knew he had been wrong. He wanted more than that, he wanted Zero's family as well. He was selfish enough to want their respect. He was greedy enough to want their approval. He was desperate enough to want their love.

"I - I never wanted - " he murmured brokenly. Oh God, now he didn't even know what to say. His humiliation was complete. How could any of them respect him now? Kaname turned back to Yuko whose face was pale and silent, her wide eyes showing shock and pain and an understanding that he never thought he would see again. At that moment, despite having Zero's colouring, Yuko looked so much like her late mother that Kaname had to press shaking fingers to his lips to suppress the sob that was trying harder to escape. He would have given anything, _anything_ to know for sure that Yuuki would look at him like this if she knew. Like she understood. Like she approved. He swallowed again, mortifyingly aware that he was just a hairsbreadth away from a complete breakdown.

"Would you mind waiting in the car, Kaname? I'll take care of this," Zero said evenly, the forgotten dish towel still gripped in one fist.

Kaname nodded numbly and turned around. He had botched everything up and now needed Zero to fix things. Somehow, he managed to walk to the front door. Somehow, his hand managed to find the doorknob and turn it. Somehow, he managed to make his way to the limousine where a very concerned looking Akira was already holding open the door. Somehow, he managed to whisper a request to the man and climb in before the tears fell in earnest.

- o -

_Some fifteen minutes later..._

Tomi had excused himself as soon as Kaname left, choosing to sit alone in the study while Zero talked to his three children. The young blond's steadfast declaration that this was a private family conversation that didn't involve him endeared him even more to Zero. He was the mirror image of Hanabusa but he had inherited not only his patience from Sayori, but also her sense of propriety.

Yuko made tea for her father and brothers and they all settled around the coffee table. Zero took a sip from his mug, aware of his children's confused eyes on him. It was difficult to speak of his relationship with Kaname to them, but it wasn't as difficult as the pureblood had found it. Zero and Yuuki had always been completely honest with their offspring. They were the very rare set of parents in whom their children confided most of their problems and secrets, including poor school grades and teenage crushes. The only thing that made it uncomfortable for Zero was the knowledge that his children had never expected him to be involved with anyone except Yuuki.

He first started his explanation by firmly stating that there were to be no more accusations leveled at Kaname who had already been hurt enough by their words earlier.

"I'm sorry, papa," Yuko was the first one to apologise, her eyes shimmering with tears. Zero shook his head and sighed.

"Not you, Yuko," he said. "I didn't hear you say anything bad to your oji-san."

She gave a small shrug and smile.

"I'd already suspected something like this a few weeks back," she admitted.

"When did this happen?" Ichiru asked abruptly, his young face still set in angry lines.

"When mama was still alive?" Isamu added, his eyes wide at the implications. Zero glared at him and then he shook his head emphatically.

"No. Everything only started after your mama passed away," he said firmly. He took another deep breath and briefly outlined what had happened, stating that Kaname's feelings for him had initially stemmed from their blood sharing sessions. Zero was the sole recipient of his blood and since Kaname wasn't involved with anyone else, he had become emotionally vulnerable to the hunter. Zero added that it had taken him some time to accept Kaname's feelings as the truth.

Yuko and the twins were silent for a minute or so. No doubt they were trying to reconcile the uncertain man with the haunted eyes they had confronted earlier with the composed, confident uncle he had been all their lives.

"But didn't you reject him, papa?" Isamu finally asked, breaking the silence. Zero returned his gaze steadily, knowing that this was what was important to his children.

"I wanted to," he said honestly. "I loved no one but your mother, you all know that. But I couldn't. He means a lot to me and no, not just because of his blood. I have always cared for your oji-san."

Zero pressed his lips together. He realised it wasn't fair to force them to accept a bombshell like this in such a short time. He had had months to get used to the idea of Kaname's feelings and the attraction between them. His children hadn't.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "I agree it was a shock. We shouldn't have broken it to you like that."

Yuko heard the 'we' and realised what it could possibly mean. She moved first, her small hand closing over her father's.

"But now? Do you love him, papa?" she asked softly. Zero stared at her, aware that his face was growing hot. Yuko as usual, had cut right to what truly mattered to them all. He could see so much of his dearest Yuuki in her.

"I care for him very much," he replied carefully. He knew it wasn't the answer Yuko was looking for, but perhaps she had read the uncertainty in his eyes because she smiled and nodded. Zero returned the smile, covering her hand with his. Then he looked at his sons.

"Do you think he really loves you, papa?" Isamu asked. He had always been a sensitive soul, more so than his older twin.

"Yeah, he could just be... playing you," Ichiru added with a concerned frown. He may not show it all the time but he loved his father very much. Zero's lips quirked a bit at their words.

"Let me ask you something," he replied. "Ichiru, if Hinata were already involved with someone else, say, Isamu, when you met her. Would you still wait for her? Just in case she was free to love again?"

"I would. For as long as it takes," Ichiru declared immediately. Before Zero could answer, Isamu turned to his twin.

"Are you sure?" he asked. "You'd wait that long?"

When Ichiru nodded stubbornly, Yuko spoke next.

"Without dating any other girl or even thinking of anyone else except her?" she probed shrewdly. "You'd wait how long? A year? Five years? Ten?"

A glimmer of doubt entered Ichiru's brown eyes. He frowned at his sister and half glanced at his younger twin before nodding stubbornly again.

"But you'd see her often because you're still family. You'd see her being happy with your brother and raising a family with him. Would you still wait?" Yuko persisted. Zero's lips quirked again although his throat felt tight. Yuko had already put Ichiru in her oji-san's position - how well she knew him - and Zero was grateful that he didn't have to say this himself and betray Kaname's trust in him.

Ichiru blinked. That would hurt. _Really_ hurt.

"I wouldn't want to see that," he said flatly.

"Not even if it made her and your brother happy?" Zero put in softly. Ichiru looked at him, comprehension dawning on his face at last.

"Is that... is that how long oji-san has loved you, papa?" he asked reluctantly. Zero nodded.

"For as long as I've been married to your mother," he said quietly. He saw their shocked looks and shook his head, a glimmer of his previous frustration showing itself.

"I never wanted him to. I never asked him to love me. Hell, I didn't even know he did until..." Zero broke off. Yuko squeezed his arm.

"Until mama died," she whispered. "Because that's just how oji-san is."

Zero nodded.

"He didn't tell me immediately. He'd kept it a secret for so long, but with the arrangement we have, it just... well, it just slipped out."

Zero knew he was blushing. What his family viewed as a generous yet taboo offer from a pureblood was now irrevocably burned into his mind as a prelude to something very different. He shook his head again. Hearing Kaname confess to his craving and then his love was a shock by itself. Hearing himself say the same thing made it even more profound.

Honestly, how had Kaname done that? Forced himself to visit his sister's home again and again over the years to share in her love and joy knowing that he was only subjecting himself to the worse pain imaginable? How on earth had Kaname been _so strong?_

Zero wasn't fooled by the shy looks and the quivers and the blushes or even the submissive behaviour. Very few people would have had the strength to hold out for as long as Kaname had. He had put so much faith in his love and devotion that nothing else mattered. He had waited as very few people would have. He had _believed_ as even fewer could have.

"For more than twenty years. I don't think I could have done that," Ichiru mumbled at last, looking more than a little uncomfortable. Isamu slung an arm around him.

"I definitely wouldn't have," he declared. "And don't worry, Hinata's like a big sister to me," he added with a grin. Yuko smiled as Ichiru scowled at his younger twin.

"All I know is that I'm lucky to have Tomi love me ever since I can remember," she said and sniffled.

"And all I know," Zero said steadily, looking at each of his children in turn, "is that I'm very lucky to have another person love me as much as your mother did."

Yuko exchanged a meaningful look with her two younger brothers. Reluctantly, they nodded at the silent question in her eyes and she turned back to Zero.

"Then I think you should tell oji-san that he's lucky too, papa. He's just as lucky to have you love him," she said. "Besides, we're all grown up now and with mama gone... you shouldn't be alone forever, you know. It might be sooner than we like, but it's up to you. Not us."

Another hand covered hers.

"I owe oji-san an apology," Ichiru said bluntly with the ruthless streak of honesty he had inherited from his father. Another hand covered his.

"Me too. He's never done anything but look out for us," Isamu added.

Zero's eyes smarted. After so many years, he now knew how Kaien Cross and Touga Yagari must have felt like when they realised Zero and Yuuki had found out about their relationship. Some people might have just brushed off the need to have their own family's support but not Zero's late adopted father and sensei. They had treasured the value of family and they had wanted the acceptance and blessing of the two people they most cared about. Zero felt exactly the same. He could survive without his children's love and acceptance, but it would be like living with only half a heart, no matter how happy Kaname made him. He knew that the two of them would only be truly happy if they knew they had their loved ones' blessing as well as each other.

And now that he had finally gotten it, Zero finally realised something else. It was so obvious now that he couldn't believe he hadn't known it before. He couldn't believe he had pushed it away each time, denying himself and Kaname the truth. In explaining their uncle's behaviour to his children, Zero finally understood his own feelings for the pureblood. He didn't just care for Kaname and he had to let him know. He didn't want to keep the pureblood waiting any longer. He also wanted Kaname to know that everything was all right, that Yuko and the twins were on their side.

"Go tell him, papa," Yuko urged. "Tell him we all want him back here. I think... I think mama would approve."

"Tell him he's family," Ichiru added. Isamu smiled and nudged his brother in the shoulder.

"Tell him he'll always be _our_ family."

Zero's throat closed up completely at their words. Wordlessly, he hugged each one of them in turn, his eyes as wet as theirs. Yuko's words about Yuuki meant so much to him, so did his sons'. Their support made all the difference in the world now and he couldn't wait to tell Kaname what they had said.

"We'll go find a place to stay in town, papa," Yuko promised. "I'm sure you want to be alone with oji-san tonight."

"We'll drop by tomorrow to apologise," Isamu promised on behalf of his brother. Yuko went to collect Tomi from the study, but all of them stopped short at the front door.

The black limousine was no longer parked out front.

- o -

A lone figure huddled next to a tombstone, shoulders hunched and miserable. Tears were sliding silently down Kaname's face as he knelt beside his beloved sister's grave. He had no idea how he managed to even find it in the state he was in since he had left a worried looking Akira at the main gates of the cemetery. All Kaname knew was that the brief happiness he had experienced for the past few weeks after more than twenty years of waiting was over. There was no way he could continue clinging onto a dream that would never come true. There was no way Zero would ever choose him over his own children's wishes.

_I was wrong, Yuuki. They will never accept me as anything but their uncle._

- Chapter End -

**A/N: **I hope you enjoyed all that angst :D Just to let you know, Zero and Yuuki finding out about Kaien Cross and Touga Yagari being lovers is documented in my fic Brief Reflections Chapter 10.


	29. Chapter 29: The Reassurance

**Author Notes:** Hello everyone! Thank you for all your lovely reviews and encouragement! We have come to the second last chapter of Hold Me Now. The last one will be the epilogue :D

I have to mention a very beautiful and heart tugging scene in **Blackened Wing**'s Blood Moon story because I had already written a similar scene at that time. It appears here at long last. Yes, I tend to write most of my stories backwards! Enjoy this chapter.

- Chapter Start -

Zero stared at the vacant spot where the limousine had earlier occupied, his stomach churning uneasily. He had a pretty good guess as to _why_ Kaname left, but where could he have gone?

Where could he have _gone?_ repeated the incredulous sounding voice in his head. Where _else_ would he go? it hissed at him. Zero exhaled. OK, so he had a fair idea where, but it was better to make sure. He fished his hand phone from his jeans pocket and dialed a number. A male voice answered after two rings, greeting him by name.

"Akira-san, could you let me know where Kaname is right now?" Zero asked. He listened to the answer and nodded.

"I thought so. Thank you, I'll be there shortly."

Zero hung up and turned around. Yuko, Tomi, Ichiru and Isamu were all staring at him anxiously.

"Kaname-oji-san's at the cemetery," he said quietly.

All four looked perplexed at first. Then Yuko nodded, her eyes soft with compassion. Her brothers and Tomi continued to sport confused looks which only cleared up after she murmured 'Mama's grave'.

Ichiru stepped forward resolutely, one hand digging in his jeans pocket for his car keys

"I'll take you there, papa," he stated firmly. "Akira-san can bring you and oji-san back later."

Isamu said he was coming along. Zero nodded at them.

"All right. Thanks, Ichiru."

"Bring him home, papa," Yuko said quietly. Zero smiled.

"I will," he promised.

_And this time, I'll hold on to him._

- o -

Kaname's limousine was indeed parked outside the gates of the silent cemetery. Akira was leaning against the car bonnet. He straightened up when he saw the headlights of the approaching car. As soon as Ichiru pulled up, Zero stepped out from the passenger seat. Ichiru and Isamu waved to Akira before driving off.

"Kiryuu-san."

Akira's bow and greeting were strictly professional, but he was deeply worried. He considered himself more than an employee of Kaname's and more than an acquaintance of Zero's, having earned their trust and friendship after many years of loyal service.

"Akira-san, thank you for telling me where Kaname is," Zero said although he had already thanked him earlier through the phone. Akira bowed his head.

"You're welcome, Kiryuu-san."

Zero nodded. His eyes slid to the cemetery gates which were slightly ajar. He could feel Kaname's presence in there. The pureblood must be too distraught to hide his aura. The anguish Zero could sense told him that Kaname was probably crying his heart out. Well, hurry up then, hissed the impatient voice in Zero's head. He shook his head at it. Despite his anxiety over Kaname, there was something he wanted to confirm first.

Zero squared his shoulders and turned back to the waiting driver who returned his gaze steadily. Akira was more than just Kaname's driver who provided excellent service, absolute discretion and unquestioning loyalty. He was also Zero's friend and a sort of father figure as well.

Zero took a deep breath.

"Akira-san, if I were to tell you that I hold Kaname in the highest regard, that I have recently come to care for him as more than just my brother-in-law, what would you say?" he asked, his words coming out a little more quickly than he had planned. It looked like he was not only a hopeless prude, but a die-hard family man as well. Why else would he be seeking approval from everyone who mattered to him?

Akira gave a genuine smile. He didn't seem surprised at all.

"I would say that love can be found with the most unlikeliest of people, and that anyone lucky enough to find love should treasure it."

"Thank you," Zero murmured. He didn't really expect Akira to pose any objections, but he was relieved all the same. Then Akira stepped forward and placed a fatherly hand on his shoulder.

"I would also say that if one has found such love the second time around, then he is doubly blessed. And if he has the support of his loved ones, then that blessing is tripled."

Zero stared at him, conscious of a lump swelling in his throat. He's right, cried the voice in his head jubilantly.

"Thank you," Zero replied, his voice turning husky. He meant it. Akira's sincere words somehow made him feel as if he had gotten approval from a representative of Kaname's family, as ridiculous as the notion might be. Akira might have already guessed that they had become lovers, but hearing his support voiced out loud made it more meaningful, more tangible. It mattered to Zero and he was sure that it mattered to Kaname as well.

Zero had already known what a relationship with a pureblood would be like. It was fine with him if the world at large thought he was just Kaname's bodyguard... or even someone obliged to warm his bed. After all, Zero was old enough to determine how he wanted to live the rest of his life. He only cared about what the people closest to him thought. His dearest Yuuki. Their children. The nobles of Kaname's inner circle whom he had befriended. Akira. Even Seiren.

"You'll be good for him, Kiryuu-san and vice-versa," Akira stated, his eyes showing his approval. "No offense to your dear Mistress Yuuki."

Zero smiled. A real smile that no longer held haunting grief, just wistfulness.

"She wouldn't have taken any, Akira-san, and you know that."

"I do indeed. She was a very kind woman. You were, and are, a lucky man."

"Thrice blessed - I know," Zero added. "I'll go get Kaname."

Akira nodded readily. Zero walked up to the gates and noticed that the iron padlock was broken, wrenched apart through sheer force. Without a word, he pocketed it and made a mental note to bring a new one tomorrow to the elderly caretaker. He then made his way swiftly to Yuuki's grave.

It was around three in the morning and everything was still and quiet. There wasn't even a breeze to stir the cool night air. The silent tombstones seemed to watch Zero as he went past. He dimly realised he hadn't brought an offering for Yuuki this time, but it wasn't important. He was more concerned with finding the pureblood who was projecting those feelings of bitter anguish that cut at his heart. Zero's strides quickened. He soon came within sight of Yuuki's grave... and the figure kneeling beside her tombstone, the pale shirt showing up in the darkness. Kaname's dark head was bowed and his arms wrapped around himself.

Zero's steps slowed down. Kaname's posture was reminiscent of the time he had knelt penitently on the cold tiles of the shower with icy water spraying down on him. Zero felt the lump in his throat swell again. He didn't know how Kaname could still love him with all the hurt he had caused him, whether accidental or deliberate, whether from himself or from his children.

_But never again, Kaname. This I promise._

Then Zero hurried forward and dropped to his knees in front of Kaname. He held the shaking shoulders and heard the hitching sobs tearing through that slender frame.

"Kaname?"

Slowly, the dark head lifted and red rimmed eyes blinked hazily at him.

"Z-Zero?"

With a soft cry, Kaname threw himself into his lover's capable arms. It was a good thing Zero was expecting this otherwise he might have fallen backwards. As it was, he cradled the distraught pureblood in his arms, tucking the dark head into his shoulder and closing his arms around him.

"I - I was wrong..."

"Shh."

"I was wrong. Never s-should have t-told them."

"No, Kaname."

"They blame me."

"No. No, they don't."

"They h-hate me."

Zero had heard enough. He sighed and dragged Kaname's head up to face him, cupping his face firmly in his hands.

"_No_, Kaname. No one hates you. No one blames you for anything. This is something _I_ want just as much as you do."

Kaname swallowed, his chest still heaving with suppressed sobs.

"I never should've told you how I felt," he choked out. Zero gave him a little shake.

"No. I'm glad you did," he said. "We both would be miserable if you hadn't."

Kaname stared at him.

"But you have your children to think of," he whispered. Zero's lips started to twitch. This was going to take some time, he thought wryly to himself. Why, do you have somewhere else to go? asked the little voice caustically. Zero ignored it.

"Yuko and the boys have their own lives to lead," he said firmly. Kaname had actually said that to him before, but apparently had forgotten.

"But they..."

Zero shook him again, a little harder this time.

"I want us to be together, Kaname," he said. The pureblood shook his head despondently.

"It will never work out," he said sadly.

"Yes, it will!" Zero insisted and shook him a third time. The tables had changed again. It was his turn now to persuade and convince.

"You saw what I couldn't see at first, Kaname," he continued earnestly. "That I can't keep on living in the past. That I need someone to take care of to truly be happy. That I'll never be whole without someone special by my side. I lost that special someone and you know that. But guess what - I've found someone else, someone just as special."

Kaname stared at him as he hung onto every word. Zero smiled at him, his amethyst eyes tender.

"Or rather, he has found me," he whispered. His thumbs gently wiped away the tears from Kaname's flushed cheeks. The pureblood continued to stare at him, his chest still heaving with softly hitching breaths.

"But you have your children to take care of," he pointed out. Zero had to laugh, he couldn't help it. Don't laugh at him, hissed the voice angrily. Zero ignored it and whisked away two more teardrops from Kaname's face.

"They're all grown up now, remember?" he reminded the pureblood before kissing his nose.

"But - but -" Kaname floundered for a reason, dark eyes darting all around the silent graveyard. Zero sighed.

"Are you trying to get rid of me now?" he teased. No, don't give him any ideas, moaned the voice in a panic. Before Zero could hush it, Kaname's eyes widened and he quickly shook his head.

"No, of course not!" he protested. Zero ignored the exaggerated sighs of relief echoing inside his head.

"Then why are you fighting me on this?" he asked Kaname, his brow wrinkling.

The dark gaze skittered away once more. Then the tip of a pink tongue came out briefly, capturing Zero's attention.

"I don't know," Kaname murmured uncertainly, his gaze fixed on the ground.

_Actually, I do know. It's because I don't want to hide my love for Zero from those who also love him._

Kaname believed that what he and Zero shared was something beautiful and precious. It was something he had waited for years to have. It was something that Zero had finally confessed he both wanted and needed. To have to conceal it from those who would not understand or those who would use it against them was bad enough. To have to hide it from those who cared about them and could be happy for them... was unbearable. It would feel like they were going behind their backs, doing something illicit and shameful.

Resolute fingers found Kaname's chin and lifted it so that he was forced to look into those amethyst eyes again.

"I know why," Zero said firmly. "It's because you've waited for so long. And you want their blessing - Yuko, Ichiru and Isamu's."

Kaname wrenched his face away, his breathing suddenly harsh.

"I'm being greedy. I shouldn't wish for so much," he mumbled. Zero exhaled, his frustration showing briefly.

"You're not being greedy, Kaname," he said patiently. "I want the same thing. I don't want to pretend in front of my own children."

He lifted a hand and gently tucked a lock of Kaname's silky hair behind his ear.

"Besides, they love you and you know that," he added softly.

"As their uncle," Kaname mumbled, but he didn't resist when Zero turned his face back.

"And as their father's lover."

Kaname shook his head and stubbornly looked down.

"No," he breathed. "They will never accept that."

Zero rolled his eyes. He jerked Kaname's head up again, less gently this time.

"Listen to me, damnit!" he snapped. Kaname's mouth fell open.

"They've _already_ accepted you!"

Kaname froze.

"But they said -" he broke off when he realised how much his voice shook.

"They told me to find you and bring you home," Zero said, his voice softening. "They said you're part of our family and that you always will be."

Kaname clutched at his arms.

"As what?" he whispered. It was suddenly hard to breathe.

"As their favourite uncle," Zero repeated and pressed his lips to Kaname's forehead. He heard the pureblood sigh.

_I'm their only uncle..._

"As my lover," Zero added and kissed each moist eyelid, feeling the long lashes tickle his lower lip. He heard the quivering breath Kaname took.

"As my friend," Zero murmured next and planted a kiss onto that perfect nose. He felt Kaname give a resolute nod.

"And as the person I want to spend the rest of my life with," Zero whispered before claiming those trembling lips. Kaname moaned softly and clung to him. Zero kissed him soundly before drawing back, gently combing his fingers through the dark, tousled hair. The voice inside his head was squealing happily at him, but he managed to ignore it. He had had plenty of practice by now.

"Come back with me, Kaname," he requested softly. His heart leapt when he saw warm hope slowly replace the heartbreak in those eyes. Kaname looked like he was on the verge of nodding when his glance slid to the picture of Yuuki embedded in the white marble.

"What if _she_ doesn't approve?" he asked softly. It was followed up by a sniffle.

"She will," Zero replied. He knew he was right. He _knew_ it, more than anything in the world. How could the most generous and loving soul in the world not want her own brother to find happiness?

And suddenly, there it was - the proof he needed was unfolding in his mind. It was a memory more than fifteen years old. It had been there all this while, biding its time and waiting for his feelings to evolve to the point where he would not only accept the memory, but welcome it with open arms. It was finally time to remind Zero of Yuuki's wish, voiced many years ago. They were curled up in bed one night, talking about the haunting loneliness they had seen in Kaname's eyes during dinner earlier.

_Yuuki didn't say anything and Zero cuddled her closer. "He has us, Yuuki... and he'll always be welcome here, you know that."_

_His words made Yuuki blink back sudden tears. She loved the fact that the two most important men in her lives no longer had any enmity between them. "You're right, Zero. But I do hope that he won't remain lonely forever... that there will be someone to love him some day."_

Zero remembered smiling at her innocent words then, but now they took on a whole new meaning that left him stunned. Was that just wishful thinking on her part... or had she somehow known? He wouldn't be in the least bit surprised if it turned out to be the latter. Yuuki was special that way. She always had been. Zero's eyes smarted. He took a deep breath, smiled at Kaname and quoted that conversation word for word.

"She - she said that?" Kaname whispered shakily. More tears appeared and Zero finally fished for a handkerchief from his pocket.

"She did," he confirmed as he gently blotted the beloved face. Kaname sniffled again, his eyes darting again to his sister's sweet face.

"But I'm sure she never meant for you – for me -"

Zero shook his head, stopping Kaname's words with a kiss.

"I'm sure she would rather it was someone she knew and loved than a stranger."

Kaname smiled and ducked his head. Hadn't he thought of a very similar thing not too long ago? That he was glad Zero had given his love to Yuuki, someone Kaname loved rather than someone else?

"So Yuko - and the boys..." he started, peeping up at Zero with absolutely adorable uncertainty. Zero kissed him again. Hard this time.

"Want to apologise to you for what they said," he reassured. Kaname frowned at that.

"Yuko didn't say anything bad," he said. Zero chuckled.

"I said that too, but you know what she's like," he said wryly.

"Yes, I do," Kaname whispered, his eyes glowing with relief. Zero hugged him close for a moment.

"So will you come home? With me?" he murmured.

"Always, Zero," Kaname whispered. His heart was so full, it hurt. "But first..."

He pulled away and Zero released him. Kaname shifted around and placed a hand on Yuuki's tombstone, looking earnestly at her picture.

"Thank you, Yuuki. I will love Zero for as long as he lives," he promised. "I will make sure that he and your children and their children will want for nothing."

Zero reached for Kaname's hand, his eyes searching out the same face.

"Thank you, dearest. I don't feel guilty anymore about loving Kaname," he said softly. "I will make sure he has as much love as he wants from me and Yuko and the boys."

Kaname felt his eyes overflow with joy at Zero's words. He held onto the hunter's hand tightly and didn't realise that Zero was making another confession to Yuuki, for this one was silent and came directly from his heart.

Although neither of them expected a reply, they still received one. A soft breeze rose and blew around Kaname and Zero, bringing with it a faint scent and a soft tinkle of laughter that were achingly familiar to both of them. The breeze swirled playfully around them, spreading warmth, love and laughter.

Hardly daring to believe their senses, Kaname and Zero turned to each other. Then the pureblood gave a soft laugh of pure joy and threw his arms around his lover. The kiss that followed was infinitely sweeter than the first one they had shared; for this time, it was witnessed by a very special soul who wanted nothing more than their happiness.

A few more minutes passed before Kaname and Zero finally left Yuuki's grave with a promise to return soon. As they slowly made their way to the gates hand in hand, Zero told Kaname of what Akira had said earlier. The pureblood wasn't surprised since he had grown to rely on his driver's discretion for some years now, but the hunter's almost shy relief still made him smile.

As soon as Akira saw them, he gave a deep bow. He offered nothing beyond his quiet greetings, but his wide smile signified his pleasure at their obvious closeness. The ride back to Cross Academy took only a few minutes to complete. Akira then wished them both a very good morning before driving off to town. He would spend the night there and return tomorrow night to take Kaname back home.

Zero locked his front door and took a deep breath before turning around. It was time to let Kaname know of the confession he had made to Yuuki earlier. It was time for a confession and a request, both of which he thought would never happen, but for love's intervention.

Love had transformed Zero once before from an angry and hopeless teen to a confident and assured young man. It transformed him again from someone who thought he could only love once to someone who vowed to spend every day from now on appreciating his second chance at love. And if that meant giving as well as taking then Zero wasn't going to complain. Not anymore.

You said it, piped up the voice suddenly, in a tone that bordered on hero-worship. Zero had to stop his mouth from twitching. Silently, he held out his hands to Kaname, palms facing upwards. The pureblood smiled and put his hands into the hunter's without hesitation.

"Kaname, will you make love to me tonight?"

Zero's quietly voiced question made Kaname blink in surprise, wondering if he had heard wrongly.

"What? Why? I thought we agreed that -"

Zero shook his head.

"I've changed my mind," he said steadily, ignoring the heat creeping up into his face. "I want to know what it's like, to be claimed by the one you love."

Kaname only stared at him.

"I'm saying that I love you," Zero added. He could see that his lover hadn't grasped what he was saying, but the voice certainly had. It was squealing just inside his right ear.

"I know," Kaname agreed softly. Zero sighed.

"I'm saying that I've fallen in love with you," he said clearly. His eye twitched as the high pitched squealing moved to his left ear instead. The dratted thing was running all over the place. Hopefully, it would fall out of his ear one day and that would be the end of it.

"Wh - Oh!"

This time, Kaname's eyes opened wide and his mouth fell open. Zero made a small grimace.

"Yeah, it shocked me as well," he said dryly. "I don't know exactly when this happened. But when I talked to Yuko and the boys earlier after you left, I just - I just knew."

Then he smiled, a slow smile that made Kaname's heart beat faster and melt at the same time.

"I just knew that I had fallen in love with you," Zero said, his voice low and husky. He was relieved to hear the small thud inside his head. With any luck, that dratted voice had swooned and would leave him in peace for a while.

Kaname's eyes filled up again. He seemed to have done nothing but weep for the past few hours. Only a few months ago, he was curled up at the back of his limousine after Yuuki's funeral, torn between despair and grief and hope as he wondered if Zero would ever grow to love him even a tenth as much as he loved her.

And now, Zero did. Perhaps even almost as much as he had loved Yuuki. Kaname didn't think he could stand anymore happiness. He tried to hold back a tiny sob and failed.

"I love you, Zero," he said, his voice shaking.

"I love you back," Zero replied solemnly. His heart was thrilling at finally being able to say those words back to Kaname and mean them from the bottom of his heart.

Kaname nodded. He gave another sob... and another one... and Zero sighed and gathered his lover in his arms again.

- o -

_A long while later..._

"You don't have to, you know," Kaname said softly. He was still warmly wrapped up in Zero's arms with his cheek pillowed on one strong shoulder. "I can't be any happier than I already am."

"I want to," Zero said earnestly. "I - I don't know if I'll like it, but at least I want to know. And it's not fair to expect you to give -"

Kaname shook his head.

"I never thought of it as unfair," he protested.

"Why not?" Zero's bewilderment was obvious in his voice. Kaname laughed softly, snuggling closer to him.

"Because I've longed to be in Yuuki's place for years, Zero. Whenever I watched the two of you, I always imagined what it would be like to receive your love, to be loved by you. I guess... that led to the idea of being made love to by you, being taken by you. You never make me feel like I'm submitting to you, or being forced in any way. I want to give you everything I have, Zero. My body is only one of them."

Zero swallowed, humbled beyond words. But he had offered and he was prepared to stand by it.

"And you never thought of claiming me? At all? It's not like you lack the equipment," he said dryly. He gave a meaningful nudge of his hips. Kaname immediately felt his flesh stir with interest. He hesitated. Not because of his body's reaction, but because he _had_ wondered what it would be like...

"All right. I have thought of it," he admitted. He pulled slightly away so that he could look Zero in the eye. "And I will do that, one day. But I want you to make love to me tonight."

_I need you to, Zero._

Zero read the silent plea in Kaname's expressive eyes and nodded. He was more relieved than he wanted to admit, but he would still stand by his word and allow Kaname to claim him when he wanted to. Who knows, he might end up liking it after all. But for now... Zero grinned and scooped Kaname up in his arms. The suddenness of his action pulled a soft cry of surprise from the pureblood.

"Yuko - the twins -" Kaname twisted his head, expecting to see their heads popping up from various hiding places all over the living room.

"They're all staying in town tonight. They'll drop by tomorrow for lunch."

"Oh."

Zero started making his way to Kaname's room.

"Yup, they probably know what we're going to do tonight and don't really want to see or hear anything," he offered casually. He grinned when Kaname blushed immediately.

"So, I get to carry you like this every night?"

"Only if no one else is around," Kaname's pureblood pride briefly and very belatedly asserted itself.

Zero chuckled.

"Fine with me," he said. "Uhm, does Seiren count?"

When Kaname's mouth fell open, Zero laughed again. He wouldn't do that of course. Seiren might faint from shock... and kill him as soon as she woke up.

Kaname glanced at his room door as they approached and it opened silently. The scent of fresh roses wafted out in welcome. Zero stepped inside the room and stumbled to a stop, tightening his arms around Kaname to avoid dropping him from shock. The gorgeous scent was courtesy of the fresh rose petals lavishly strewn on the large double bed, where the coverlet had already been neatly turned down. The wall lamps were switched on just bright enough for them to make out the white, pink and red velvety petals lying against the soft cotton sheets.

"Who..." began Kaname wonderingly. Zero grinned and shook his head, his face warming despite himself. Then their eyes met and they voiced the same name at the same time.

"Yuko."

The thought of making love to Kaname on a bed of rose petals made Zero's body tighten in anticipation, but it was tempered a little by Yuko's loving if unexpected gesture.

"I'm embarrassed," Zero confessed. He wasn't entirely surprised when Kaname smiled up at him.

"I'm not," he said. I'm not either, piped up another voice. Zero closed his eyes on a silent, long suffering sigh. Then he squared his shoulders and nudged the door closed with his foot. He walked over to the bed and gently lowered his lover onto the fragrant sheets. After removing Kaname's shoes, socks and clothes, he leaned back and just enjoyed the sight before him. Kaname was beautiful in all settings, but the carpet of soft petals rendered him almost ethereally lovely.

"Please don't waste Yuko's effort, Zero," Kaname whispered, his hands sliding over his lover's arms and shoulders to frame that beloved face. He pulled Zero down for a kiss.

"She went to so much trouble," he murmured against the hunter's lips. Zero raised his head and smiled.

"She did and we won't," he agreed.

And they didn't. The sun was well over the horizon when they finally fell asleep with Kaname's head pillowed on Zero's shoulder and contented smiles on their faces. Each and every rose petal was well crushed amongst the rumpled sheets under their damp and sated bodies.

- o -

It was late afternoon when Kaname and Zero finally dragged themselves out of bed. They shared a shower which took almost thirty minutes before making it to the kitchen for breakfast, their skin glowing from hot water and more love making in the bathroom.

Before they knew it, it was time for Zero to start preparing lunch. Kaname had just placed the last dish on the dining table when the doorbell rang. Yuko, Tomi and her brothers had arrived.

Zero held Kaname's hand firmly in his as they went to open the front door.

Ichiru and Isamu approached them first. They greeted their father briefly before turning to their uncle. Ichiru gave Kaname a deep and formal bow with his right hand over his heart, which stunned the pureblood speechless. He then followed it up with a sincere apology that surprised his father as well. Isamu was next. He repeated his elder twin's bow and offered his own, just as earnest apology to an increasingly embarrassed Kaname.

Zero just watched in silence, biting his lip to keep from smiling wryly. He had no doubt his sons' apologies were sincere, but they seemed to be enjoying their show of contrition just a bit _too_ much. A quick glance at Yuko's raised eyebrows told Zero she thought the very same thing. Behind her, Tomi was already grinning and shaking his head.

As soon as Isamu was finished, Kaname accepted his nephews' apologies by giving them a hug and a smile. He quickly pre-empted Yuko's apology by enfolding her in his arms and kissing her forehead.

"Thank you," he whispered to her. Then he turned back and graciously accepted his nephews' further apologies. Zero finally had to cut in before his irrepressible sons could take things further by going down on their knees, which he suspected was to be the next stage of their 'performance.'

In a short while, everyone was happily seated around the dining table. Zero had prepared stir fried vegetables, sweet and sour chicken and beef in black pepper sauce, accompanied with steamed white rice.

This meal was far more jovial than the subdued affair of last night. The knowledge that their beloved uncle was now a closer family member than before somehow brought a greater feeling of togetherness to Yuko and her brothers. The three of them had had a long talk last night and agreed that their father's happiness should also be theirs as well. After all, it wasn't too long ago that they were worried for his sanity after their mama died.

As for Kaname-oji-san, he was radiant with happiness. Yuko was actually tempted to start asking her uncle for more details on their romance, but she held her tongue. She loved him dearly, but she still missed her mother very much. Perhaps a few months later... when the sharp ache of loss had lessened and when her papa wasn't around, she would tease her uncle for his side of the story.

Halfway through the meal, Zero paused and looked around the table. He couldn't help remembering his late father and late sensei's relationship once again. It was Yuuki's love that had enabled him to be more understanding of the two older hunters. Zero was sure that neither of them expected to find love with their best friend and one time partners. Just as he himself never expected to find love with his one time rival and brother-in-law.

Zero saw Kaname's eyes dart around the table and rejoiced to see them glowing with a joy and contentment that made his heart swell with pride. He had found love again and no longer felt guilty or unworthy of it.

Kaname took in the happy faces seated around the table. He felt a familiar pang that his beloved sister was no longer here, but those who were almost made up for it. There would be others as well – Ichiru's fiancée, Hinata, and perhaps someone for Isamu. And babies – Kaname smiled fondly at Yuko who was happily polishing off her second bowl of rice. Then his eyes went to his precious, beloved hunter whom he somehow knew was thinking back to the same night he was.

Kaname remembered sitting at this very table so many years ago and envying his sister. He finally had what he had waited for so long to have - a family that he belonged to, and a love to call his own.

_You left your treasures behind, dear one, but I will take good care of them. This I promise._

- Chapter End -


	30. Chapter 30: The Epilogue

**Author Notes:** Hello everyone and Happy New Year! Here is the final chapter to a story that I started more than 2 years ago. I have enjoyed writing this story despite it eating up all my free time and hope you have enjoyed reading it as much.

**Appreciation:** My grateful thanks and appreciation to all my faithful readers and reviewers. Thank you once again for taking time to share your thoughts with me, they have been my primary source of motivation for each and every chapter.

- Chapter Start -

It was almost ten o'clock now, a mere two hours before the year officially ended. Kaname and Zero had arrived at the former's country villa an hour ago and enjoyed an early meal of fresh mussel broth in white wine and superbly grilled lamb cutlets served with an exquisite, slightly spicy mint sauce, wild rice and buttered asparagus. Not typical breakfast fare perhaps, but delicious all the same.

Zero inhaled deeply, pulling the cool fresh air into his lungs and letting it out with a sigh. He was leaning his forearms on the stone balustrade at the first floor balcony, wineglass in hand and enjoying the incessant song of the crickets. He didn't move when Kaname came to stand beside him, mirroring his stance exactly so that the tip of his left elbow touched Zero's right one.

Without blinking, the hunter switched his wineglass to his left hand so that he could continue sipping at the full bodied red wine without breaking contact with his lover. He was relaxed and contented now, but something continued to gnaw at his conscience, something that had caused two butterflies from goodness knows where to end up inside his tummy where they were now merrily chasing each other amongst the lamb and asparagus, and taking playful dips in the small pools of red wine and broth here and there.

A week ago, Zero had cooked Christmas dinner for his family at Cross Academy – roast turkey, glazed ham, mashed potatoes and mini chicken pot pies with light, flaky pastry and a delicious filling of chicken, carrot, onion and celery. A heavily pregnant Yuko, Tomi, Ichiru, Isamu and Hinata were there, together with Hanabusa Aido and Sayori. And Kaname, of course.

Zero took another sip of wine. His Christmas gift to Kaname was an understated, solid gold tie pin. The pureblood had exclaimed prettily over it and thanked him with a heartfelt kiss in front of the others. Although Yuko and the twins' enthusiastic cheers had rendered Zero red with embarrassment, he was secretly gratified with Kaname's response. After all, the pureblood already owned half a dozen tie pins, each more gorgeously crafted than the one he now held in his hand.

Kaname's gift to him had been an equally understated yet expensive pair of white gold cufflinks. Zero had chuckled when he examined them closely and found a tiny engraving of a skull on each one that was the mirror image of one of his ear piercings. Kaname had an eye for detail all right. The hunter had thanked him with a chaste kiss on the cheek, much to the disappointment of all those watching.

And yet, it was the _other_ gift that Zero had not given Kaname that occupied his mind now. And getting older by the minute, reminded that pesky little voice in his head. It hadn't fallen out of his head yet, worst luck, but it was thankfully quieter now, only popping up now and again to squeal at something or other.

I know, Zero replied it absently. He had no intention of going into the new year without delivering on this particular promise first. His lips twisted wryly at the happy squeal that followed.

The past few months had flown by faster than Zero could ever have thought possible. He felt as if he was finally living again and no longer just dragging himself from day to day as he had in those earlier months when his world first collapsed around him. He still missed Yuuki of course, and he always would, but what he had now was so much worth living for.

Zero continued his hunter duties with zeal, whether it was going out on missions or tutoring the younger generation of hunters at the HA. He enjoyed his weekends and days off that he spent with Kaname and with his children, whether together or separately. He cherished each day that passed and never failed to tell his family that he loved them. Zero sometimes thought he told Kaname that more than he told his children, but that was because he saw or spoke to the pureblood almost every night. Besides, as he confessed wryly to Yuuki during one early morning visit to the cemetery, her brother made each and every declaration worth it... and then some.

Zero had kept his vow never to hurt Kaname again very close to his heart. He was pleased to see a return of the more confident and suave pureblood he had known before. In front of those he trusted, Kaname's behaviour towards him was composed, loving and respectful. The pureblood only displayed his delightfully submissive side when he was alone with Zero who treasured those moments. It reminded him of their earlier months and the promises he had made to himself, to Kaname and to Yuuki – to be thankful for each day granted to him and to fully appreciate his second chance at loving someone and being loved in return.

Hence, Kaname had never been happier. He felt completely appreciated, wholly accepted and wonderfully taken care of. He felt so loved that he wore a smile on his face each morning before he slept and woke up with another smile. In front of Zero's children and their trusted spouses, his inner group of nobles, Seiren, Akira and his loyal personal assistants who would rather die than betray him in any way, Kaname showed his feelings for his lover openly and without reserve. He got up to greet Zero with a kiss and a smile whenever the latter visited his office, which was admittedly rare.

Seiren never failed to interrupt any of Kaname's meetings when Zero called and Kaname never hesitated to answer no matter what he was doing or where he was. Someone whom he had waited twenty years for was, in his book, infinitely more important than anything related to his business.

When Zero escorted Kaname to the occasional vampire galas and dinners, he played the part of respectful and fiercely protective bodyguard to perfection. For some reason, his deferential manners and submissive 'Kaname-sama's' sent a thrill up the pureblood's spine especially when he knew that later on, he would be pinned under his hunter or pushed up against a wall while being thoroughly made love to or fed from or both. Kaname found the contrast in Zero's behaviour deliciously erotic.

Right now, he was longing for one such encounter.

"Zero? Shall we go upstairs?"

Zero turned at the light nudge of Kaname's elbow against his own, smiling as he read the invitation in those dark eyes. Yes, it was way past time to deliver his second gift.

- o -

They held hands as they made their way upstairs. Zero was used to his lover's gracious manners by now; he wasn't surprised when Kaname opened his room door and gestured for him to go in first. Zero took a couple of steps into the room and stopped short at the sight that greeted him.

The wall lights were switched on low, allowing him to see that a fireplace had been built into the wall directly opposite the bed. A small but cheerful fire crackled invitingly behind a fine mesh screen that served a dual purpose in keeping the ash out and muting the bright glare of the flames. The cream coloured carpet had been replaced by hardwood flooring which showed up a large, silver fur rug lying in front of the fireplace.

Zero's eyebrows were well up when he swung to Kaname who smiled happily at him, his eyes twinkling mischievously.

"When did you do all this? And is that real?"

"A month ago. And don't worry, no silver minks were hurt in the production of that. It's not real fur," he reassured.

Zero smiled and turned back to look at the inviting scene.

"I never would have thought of this, but it's beautiful, Kaname," he admitted.

The pureblood's dark eyes glowed with pleasure. He raised their joined hands and pressed a kiss to Zero's fingers.

"Shall we?" he murmured, tilting his head towards the rug. Zero grinned and nodded. They slipped off their shoes and socks, leaving them on the floor and enjoying the smooth feel of the varnished wood under their feet. By the time they reached the rug, they had dropped their jackets on the bed along with Kaname's silk tie.

Zero couldn't help shaking his head when he spied the silver ice bucket resting on a folded towel nearby. Beside it stood two delicate champagne flutes, the cut crystal reflecting the light of the fire. Next to them was a silver platter of fresh strawberries.

Zero sat cross legged on the rug and arched an eyebrow at Kaname.

"Are you planning to seduce me?" he teased. Kaname sank gracefully onto his knees and lowered his gaze, long lashes lying against creamy cheeks flushed with a hint of colour.

"Perhaps," he murmured. Zero chuckled and reached for his hands.

"I'm all for it," he assured Kaname who just blinked at him. They stared at each other in silence, long enough for Zero to start worrying. Then Kaname smiled.

"Sorry," he murmured. "I was just remembering..." how adamant Zero had been when he first stated his requirements. How firm and immovable he had sounded in the back of the limousine one night on their way back from a dinner party.

_"I'm ready for more intimacy, Kaname."_

_"But I won't - I can't submit, not even to you. I don't care how it goes in public but when it's the two of us, I want to be the one to – to claim, to take. Always, Kaname."_

At that moment, the pureblood was so ecstatic over Zero's words that he hadn't minded at all. He still didn't.

"How stubborn I was back then, you mean?"

Kaname blinked, brought out of his reverie at Zero's dry tone. He gave a small shrug.

"I didn't mind then and I still don't," he assured him.

"But I changed my mind, remember?" Zero prompted him, his eyes determined.

"I know," Kaname said with another smile. "I remember..." how equally adamant Zero had been when he had changed his mind, just before he confessed his love.

_"Kaname, will you make love to me tonight?"_

_"I've changed my mind," he said steadily, ignoring the heat creeping up into his face. "I want to know what it's like, to be claimed by the one you love."_

"And yet you've never reminded me," Zero prompted dryly. Kaname ducked his head, but not fast enough to hide his blush.

"It doesn't matter," he mumbled. Just as he expected, strong fingers tipped his chin up.

"It matters to me," Zero said, his tone now matching the fierce look in his eyes. "I made a promise, damnit!"

Kaname gave a jerky nod, looking strangely nervous.

"I know," he said, his tongue coming out briefly to lick at suddenly dry lips.

"Good," Zero said firmly, his eyes following the darting movements of that talented pink tongue. "Because I want to deliver on that promise right now."

His hand moved to cup Kaname's cheek, thumb brushing over the full lower lip.

"Make love to me, Kaname," he whispered persuasively. "I've been waiting."

The words made Kaname's eyes smart. He hadn't wanted to remind Zero before partly because the hunter had never brought it up again, and partly because Kaname enjoyed having his lover claim him. But now...

"All right," he agreed. Then he darted a shy glance at Zero, "and perhaps you shouldn't bite me this time, otherwise I might not last long enough!"

Zero chuckled.

"It's a deal!"

But even with that delightful possibility hanging in the air, Kaname wasn't in any hurry. He expertly opened one of the bottles of chilled Dom Perignon and poured the sparkling drink for both of them. They made themselves more comfortable on the silver mink, stretching out on their stomachs and facing each other. After toasting each other, they sipped champagne and fed each other strawberries, filling a delightful half hour with sips and nibbles interspersed with teasing kisses and loving whispers.

Eventually, Kaname placed their empty glasses aside. He captured Zero's mouth again in a full and lush strawberry scented kiss, sucking the hunter's tongue into his mouth. Simmering desire flared immediately between them, flashing through their veins, warming their blood and setting nerve ends alight.

Without the need for words, they rose up onto their knees with their mouths still fused together, fingers busy with each other's shirt buttons. Kaname swiftly divested Zero of his top, his nimble fingers then undoing the hunter's trouser button and zipper with equal swiftness. He pushed the trousers down and cupped the taut buttocks, squeezing the firm flesh with delighted appreciation and pulling the hunter close at the same time.

Zero growled as he felt his lover's aroused body against his, faintly annoyed that he hadn't gotten Kaname's shirt off yet. He gave up and went for the fine wool slacks instead, almost tearing off the leather belt in his haste.

Almost absently, Kaname held out a hand and summoned the lube from the nightstand drawer to his hand. He continued nibbling his way along Zero's jaw line to his ear, licking at the silver accessories he found there.

Zero had just pulled Kaname's stiffened length from his slacks when he gasped – a finger slickened with gel had slipped between his buttocks. It was the first time Kaname had ever touched him there. The sensation made Zero squirm, his attention now divided between the rigid flesh in his hand, the hot mouth at his ear and the searching finger circling his entrance. When it started pressing into him, Zero's breath hitched.

Kaname pushed his finger in as far as it could go and then held still as Zero leaned back to look at him.

"How does it feel?" Kaname whispered.

"S'OK," Zero mumbled. _Weird_ was more like it, but at least it didn't hurt.

Kaname nodded. He pulled his finger almost completely out and slid it back in. Surprised pleasure flashed momentarily over Zero's features.

"It feels -"

"Good?" Kaname suggested with a smile. Zero offered a tentative nod.

_Still weird, but not so bad..._

"You've given me pleasure, Zero," Kaname said softly. "I want you to give you the same."

Zero swallowed, touched at the promise in those dark eyes. So many times, he had been the one controlling their intimate sessions, setting the pace with Kaname willingly following. It was a bit disconcerting to realise that he was the one following the pureblood now, moving into territory that was as familiar as it was unknown. Zero clenched his muscles again around Kaname's finger and saw the dark eyes widen.

"Don't - you're tight enough as it is," Kaname protested softly.

To his chagrin, Zero flushed. He was pretty sure he had said something similar to Kaname before, but having it said to himself made him feel... well... uh, not quite manly_._ In other words, _girly?_ Cackled the evil voice inside his head. Zero's eye twitched, but he ignored both eye and voice.

"Go on," he said, the words sounding a bit more abrupt than he had intended.

Kaname obeyed, wriggling another slickened finger inside his lover. Zero grimaced and shifted his hips a little. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and forced his muscles to relax, knowing - or hoping, rather - it would help. True enough, the sharp stretch started to ease up. He exhaled and took a deep breath and then held it as those slender fingers started moving in and out of him, slow and sure.

"Still good?" Kaname asked. Zero nodded cautiously, his hands tightening on the pureblood's bare shoulders.

_Feels strange, but kinda good too..._

Kaname's smile turned tenderly knowing as he twisted his hand from side to side. Zero gave a violent shudder, his breath left his lungs in a gasping rush. He dug his fingers into Kaname's flesh tightly enough to bruise.

"Unh! What the -"

Kaname stopped as he stared into startled amethyst eyes that had snapped open. Zero squirmed a little before pressing down on those fingers, intrigued by the strange mixture of both pleasure and pain.

"Don't stop," he said breathlessly. "I - it feels -"

"Great?" Kaname's soft voice contained a small laugh.

Zero made a tiny grimace before nodding once. There was an annoying chorus of 'I knew it! I knew it!'s' going around inside his head, but he tuned it out.

Kaname's smile deepened.

"I know how good it feels, Zero. You make me feel that each time," he confessed.

Zero stared at him, his chest heaving quickly. Part of him was exulting at how pleased Kaname looked, but the other part was squirming in embarrassment at the physical location of those fingers.

Oh, hush, you've done that yourself, admonished the voice sternly. Zero was about to snap at it when his focus splintered. Kaname's fingers had gone deeper inside him. They twisted again and brushed up against something that made Zero's body go rigid, muscles clamping hard around those fingers and breath whooshing out of his lungs. Absolutely flabbergasted amethyst eyes stared into knowing ones that gleamed with pride and shimmered with moisture.

"Now you know," Kaname whispered. "Now you know some of the pleasure you've given me."

Zero swallowed past a throat that was suddenly, inordinately painful as two tears slipped from Kaname's eyes despite that beautiful smile.

"No, Kaname," he groaned. "Not as much - as you've given - unh!"

Zero broke off and shuddered again as Kaname's fingertips rubbed and stroked and teased. He lifted himself a little and shifted his knees wider apart, still squirming and panting. The flickering light of the fire danced off the faint sheen of moisture on his skin. Kaname was teasing him relentlessly now.

"Oh God!" Zero choked out. "It feels - I - ahh...!"

He groaned again, shifting his knees even wider. Kaname obliged happily, thrusting the tips of his fingers harder against that small bump whose precise position was already burned into his memory. He was aching with need, but his beloved Zero made an absolutely riveting picture, all flushed and helpless at his touch. Why on earth had he waited so long, Kaname found himself wondering. He should have pleasured Zero like this months ago!

To Kaname, making love was never a question of possession or submission. It was always an intimate and precious act that connected him to the one he loved, which was why he had never sought it with anyone else before. At Zero's groan, Kaname cupped the back of that tousled silver head with his free hand and guided his helpless lover forward until Zero's forehead was resting on his shoulder. He curled his arm around those strong but trembling shoulders, reveling in the tightness of his lover's body. He was already longing to see the final bliss in Zero's eyes when he joined their bodies together.

Slowly, Kaname worked a third finger inside Zero who tensed in his embrace, hips jerking in protest and breath hissing sharply past his teeth. Kaname froze immediately.

"Are you all right?" he asked worriedly.

"Give... a moment," Zero gasped, still keeping his head down. Kaname pressed his lips to the damp silver hair, his other hand sliding down to slowly stroke the hunter's softening length.

"As long as you need," he murmured soothingly.

It was several moments before Zero's flesh stiffened again in his grasp. The hunter slowly lifted his head, looking flushed and rather embarrassed. Kaname read the silent question in those amethyst eyes and quickly shook his head.

"No, Zero. You've never hurt me," he promised. "My body adapts faster than yours."

He captured Zero's mouth in a gentle kiss.

"I love you," he breathed and felt Zero's lips smile against his.

"Love you back," the hunter said and then he grimaced. "Although I feel a bit like a girl now..."

Kaname laughed softly, his eyes limpid and tender.

"Are you telling me that's how I feel most of the time?" he teased. To his surprise, Zero only shrugged instead of laughing it off.

"Do you?" he asked solemnly.

"Never!" Kaname protested, shaking his head. "Just loved and cherished and very happy," he vowed. "But if you would rather stop..."

Zero shook his head as well.

"No," he said, his eyes determined. "I _want_ this, Kaname. I _want_ you to claim me." Claim him, Kaname! shrieked the voice ecstatically. Zero ignored it and held the pureblood's gaze. This really wasn't about being in control or submitting, but about learning... and sharing, feeling and trusting.

Kaname smiled. Ignoring his growing want, he started fisting Zero again, his other hand thrusting and stretching with relentless patience as his lover panted and shivered in his arms. At length, Kaname pulled out his fingers. They took a moment to shed the rest of their clothes before Kaname squeezed out more lube to coat himself as he had seen Zero do countless times before.

"Ready?" he asked with a smile. Zero took a deep breath and nodded. He shuffled forward on his knees. Kaname sank onto his heels, one hand balancing himself on the fur rug, the other hand holding his erection in place. Zero positioned himself over Kaname, their breaths coming out shakily as the tip of a flushed head nudged against a rosy, well stretched entrance.

"Slowly," Kaname whispered.

And slowly it was. Zero finally allowed his pureblood lover to breach him where no one else had before.

"You - are the first one... to make love to me - like this," Zero reminded Kaname, his words breaking in parts as he started to impale himself.

"I know," Kaname gasped, finding Zero's body exquisitely warm and wondrously tight. The fire continued to crackle and burn, reflecting off moisture slicked skin as their bodies slowly moulded to one another's.

Zero persevered, forcing his muscles to stay relaxed even when it started to seriously hurt. Kaname had always welcomed him wholeheartedly into his body and Zero wanted to give the same thing back to him - complete surrender, complete trust.

"Slowly," Kaname reminded him again. He let go of his erection when it was half buried, both hands going to support Zero's waist instead. "We have all the time in the - aah!"

Zero had pushed himself down with a hard jerk, groaning in agonised pain as he took Kaname fully inside him at last. They froze in place with their chests heaving against each other's. Kaname's eyes fluttered closed as he stopped breathing for a moment, commanding his trembling body to hold out in the wake of all that gorgeous, pulsating heat surrounding him. Then he took a deep breath and opened his eyes.

Zero was already watching him. The expression in his moist amethyst eyes was defiant and proud and vulnerable all at the same time. Kaname found his vision blurring almost instantly, his throat tight with emotion. He leaned forward and captured Zero's mouth in a tender kiss. His heart was overflowing with so much love, it almost hurt. When he pulled back, Zero looked concerned.

"Are you all right?" they both asked at the same time. Then they blinked in surprise. The smiles came after that, tentative and even strangely shy that an intimate moment like this could bring a touch of humour.

Zero braced his hands on Kaname's shoulders again and shifted his hips, relieved to find that it no longer hurt as much. Kaname's hard length inside him was impossible to ignore, but not unwelcome. Zero offered another smile to Kaname and got one in return.

Then Kaname was pushing his hips upwards and Zero was pressing down. Their movements grew more decisive, Kaname's upward thrusts increased in strength and speed. With Zero spread wide open over his lover, the head of Kaname's erection rubbed insistently at his sensitive core - he cried out sharply as they started bucking into each other. Tension had coiled tightly in their bellies for some time now and there was no letting up.

Kaname started fisting Zero hard, almost sobbing at the incredible joy of feeling his body sheathed inside his lover again and again, seeing the proof of bliss indelibly stamped on Zero's face.

With the delicious friction fueling the passion already burning inside them, everything soon came together in an explosion of sheer unadulterated bliss. Zero reached ecstasy first, splashing creamy fluid over their stomachs with a hoarse cry as he rocked himself mindlessly back and forth on his lover's rigid flesh.

Kaname followed him mere seconds later, hips still thrusting frantically as he screamed out his own orgasm, expelling his seed deep inside Zero. The hunter's muscles were contracting wildly, making Kaname shudder as his flesh was ruthlessly and exquisitely squeezed.

They finally collapsed in each other's arms, trembling and gasping for breath, their senses full of the intoxicating scent of their mingled passion. Several minutes passed before Zero finally opened his eyes. Kaname was leaning over him, his face flushed and his dark eyes sparkling and joyful.

"I -" Zero shook his head, a rueful smile appearing on his lips. "That was... that was amazing, Kaname."

Oh, you can _definitely_ say that again, declared a very satisfied sounding voice inside his head. Kaname uttered a soft laugh and bent down over to kiss Zero who was steadfastly trying to ignore the strange sensation of warm liquid trickling out from his rather sore body.

"Do you need my blood?" Kaname murmured softly.

Zero shook his head.

"Not right now," he assured. Then he frowned a little.

"Did you enjoy that, Kaname?" he asked. The pureblood nodded, giving a slightly embarrassed smile.

"I did, actually," he confessed. "But it's OK if you prefer -"

Zero stopped his words with his fingers.

"I'm fine with it either way," he said firmly. Then he grinned. "But I prefer taking you."

Kaname just seemed to enjoy himself more when he was being claimed, if the volume of his screams were anything to go by. Zero found he was well and truly addicted to those blissful cries. Not that the pureblood had remained silent earlier.

"I prefer that too," Kaname replied solemnly. Zero pulled him down for another kiss.

"Good. As long as you know..."

And found Kaname's fingers pressed against his lips in turn.

"I do know, Zero. Thank you."

Zero gave a relieved smile. He had made good on his promise at last. A quick glance at the wall clock told him he had done so with only minutes to spare. He pulled the still smiling pureblood into his arms and enjoyed the plush feel of the faux fur against his skin. Making love on a bed of fresh rose petals was good, but this was even better.

As they lay nestled together, Kaname directed his power towards the windows, unlatching one of them and pushing it open a few inches. Soon, their keen hearing caught the faint sounds of the countdown to the new year from the staff downstairs.

As the choruses of 'Happy New Year!' reached their ears, Kaname turned around and bumped his nose teasingly against Zero's.

"Happy New Year," he murmured.

"Happy New Year," Zero echoed. He touched their lips together in a gentle kiss that soon turned into two and then three. With a groan, Zero tightened his arms around Kaname and rolled them over. He winced as a sharp pain made itself known. Before he could open his mouth, Kaname arched his neck with a smile.

"Bite me, Zero."

The hunter obliged with a sigh and a grateful smile. He fitted his face in the graceful curve of Kaname's neck and gave a teasing lick. In minutes, his lips and fangs had rendered the pureblood quivering with need and the sting between his legs had almost completely disappeared. Zero was happily mouthing a pert rose pink nipple when his hand phone rang.

Kaname pouted at the interruption, but by the time the short call ended, neither of their minds were on making love anymore. A wonderful New Year's present had just been delivered.

Zero disappeared into the bathroom for a quick shower as Kaname dug his own hand phone from his pocket and called Akira, telling him to get the car ready.

- o -

_An hour and a half later..._

Kaname turned from the window of the private hospital room. The sight that met his eyes deepened his smile and caused the soft, sweet ache in his chest to almost overflow.

Zero was cradling his first grandchild in his arms. Yuko had given birth to a healthy baby boy just one minute after midnight. The infant had inherited his father's irrepressible blond curls, but the eyes were pale amethyst. They were also staring curiously up at Zero.

Kaname's eyes lingered on the sure way his lover was holding the baby in his strong, capable arms. For a moment, the ache in Kaname's chest sharpened to actual pain. He quickly turned back to the window, eyes squeezing shut. He wanted children as well, sons and daughters. He could have them any time he wished, he knew that. There were many eligible young pureblood and noble class females whose families would only be too happy to merge their blood with the famed and pure Kuran line.

But none of them would be Zero Kiryuu and for that reason alone, Kaname always pushed away the longing each time it surfaced within him. That was one of the reasons why he travelled to Cross Academy as often as he could, to assuage that ache by partaking in his niece and nephews' childhood years. Still, seeing Zero holding his first grandchild was extraordinarily painful. It was a reminder of something that would never happen.

Kaname took a deep breath and squash that longing back down. He was a pureblood, he was almost immortal. But Zero wasn't, as much as Kaname tried not to think about it. He wouldn't have forever with Zero, only a century or two with the help of his powerful blood. So why the hell was he thinking of a family now? He should be thinking, as he did every single day, of how damned lucky he was and how he had vowed never to let an hour go by without cherishing the happiness he now held in his grasp.

After all, Kaname had already obtained something that he thought was impossible a year ago – Zero Kiryuu's love. Zero loved him enough to risk telling his children, enough to surrender his body, enough to embrace a love that could never be made public. Kaname vowed again to cherish every moment of what he had and live life to the fullest. Anything less was completely unacceptable.

"Oji-san? Would you like to carry him?"

Kaname took a deep breath and made sure the only emotion displayed on his face was joy before he turned around to smile at Yuko.

"I would love to," he said softly and meant every word. He was a grand uncle now and surely the happiest one in the whole wide world.

- o -

_Two hours later..._

The black limousine had left the main roads fifteen minutes ago and was now on the narrow road leading up the hills to the country villa. Akira had already conveyed his warm congratulations to Tomi and Yuko before going back downstairs to await Kaname and Zero. Their visit to the private hospital had lasted a little longer when an excited Hanabusa and Yori arrived.

Akira negotiated the winding curves of the road expertly, ensuring the smoothest possible ride for his two passengers in the backseat.

"What are you thinking of, Zero?"

Zero was looking down at his lap where his fingers were entwined with Kaname's. He looked up and smiled.

"Yuko's son," he replied unhesitatingly. "I wish Yuuki were here to see him and hold him."

Kaname was also guilty of recalling the sweet, innocent scent of his grand nephew and the precious slight weight in his arms earlier. He squeezed Zero's hand, offering silent comfort.

"I wish that too," he whispered.

Zero smiled and pressed a kiss on the back of Kaname's hand.

"No, you don't," he said with a touch of wryness. "Because then –"

The slender fingers trembled in his.

"Because then you two would still be together," Kaname murmured. "I know, but I miss her too."

Zero blinked hard, knowing that their loss would continue to haunt them for a long while yet. After all, only a year had passed since Yuuki died. But because he was now with the one person who would never mind talking about her, Zero knew he was thrice blessed. He raised Kaname's hand to his lips again and pressed a gentle kiss on the soft palm.

"Thank you, Kaname," he said softly. "For knowing that I would need you. For loving me and believing in me and waiting for me."

Kaname's eyes sparkled with unshed tears, but his smile was beautiful.

"Thank you, Zero," he choked out. "For giving love a second chance. For loving me and sharing your family with me."

_It's finally my turn now, to be held and loved._

- Story End -

**A/N:** Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed the story, please take a moment to review and share your thoughts with me. It would be most appreciated. Thank you again!

The sequel to this story is **Gift of Trust**.


End file.
